Hi there. I am a 27year ols female. I have been married for 6 years. I have cheated on him about 2 years ago so i told him about it.. Now the past few months i have been fantazing about other men and flirting with my boss. do i have a problem
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Anonymous
ANSWERS: 25
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Well let's see. You said you cheated. If you didn't refer to it as such, then you probably wouldn't. The fact that you did, indicates that you do know within you- it's wrong.
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Yes. You need to do an assessment of your situation. If you really love your husband, you should be able to resist any urges to flirt or cheat. Think about how you would feel if he cheats and flirt with other women.
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You only have a problem if your husband has a problem. I survived an open marriage for 12 years. And the reason we broke up had absolutely nothing to do with our sexual activities. I know that's probably not helpful, but there it is.
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You do have a problem, you obviously are not totally committed which is the most important part of a marriage or any relationship for that matter. Try fantasizing with your husband by mixing up your sex life ie. role playing go out to some new places, make love in more positions, buy some new toys etc. Try communicating more. I would not want to be him now. I hope you work it out.
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Maybe there is something in ur marriage that is making u unhappy, which might make u notice other men more. Maybe u see in those men what ur missing at home. There is nothing wrong with fantazing and a little flirting as long as it don't go any further than that. Flirting can make a person feel good about themselves and make others feel good. I used to do it all the time at work to some of my customers and it made this feel good and they knew that it wasn't anything to it. And some of them would flirt back which made me feel good. I am sure there are alot of people that fantisize about other people and just don't won't to admit it. I fanatisize all the time about a certain person even though i'm in relationship. But that doesn't mean anything is gonna happen..
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you do have a problem let the man know the truth about who you are tell him everything. And then let him decide if your worth staying with. Only after knowing the truth
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yea i would say you have a problem.
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Yes, you do have a problem. You lack two basic things that a good spouse brings to a marriage: empathy and character. If you are okay with who you are, then don't change a thing. If you want to be a better person, you'd better start working on it ASAP or you might as well never be married again. Because once you tell someone the TRUTH about who you really are, they are going to run like the wind.
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Yes, you have a problem. You don't seem to have much respect for your husband. I sure hope you do NOT choose to bring children into this marriage you seem hell bent on destroying.
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Well, what perspective are you coming from? From a religious perspective yes, you have a problem. For some people what you do is fine. I think you have a problem.
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This could be considered a problem but there are ways to work through this IF you and your husband have a trusting marriage now. You state you had a situation 2 years ago and it seems your husband has forgiven and worked past the situation. With this said, and with the feelings you state you have would it be possible to talk with your husband about a non-monogamus marriage with your husband? This is also known as swinging, sex with no sustained relationship or polyamory, sex with a few select couples or people inwhich there is a relationship often involved. Look through this web site and do a little study. http://www.libchrist.com/poly/contents.html If you would like more information I have a great deal please email me my address is in my AB profile. I try to help with these type things and have a great amount of information. I am here to help. What you desire is not wrong nor adultery nor cheating IF you have permission of your husband and are in agreement.
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My ex cheated on me 1 time that i know of, that is why she is my ex. When i found out, it broke my heart and i wasn't going to give her a 2nd chance to break it again. I'm remarried now and my ex is in her late 30's living on her own doing favors for men much older than her and giving us a hard time. I guess she thought the grass was greener on the other side.
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No...it just means that monogamy is not for you, or at least monogamy with this guy isnt for you. You need to be a grown up here and leave this relationship if your partner isnt happy with you sleeping with others. Why would you choose to hurt someone so badly becuase you arent able to face the reality of who or how you are. There is nothing wrong with not being monogomous - so therfore you do not have a problem, many people lie to themselves trying to live up to societys ridiculous rules. What you clearly need to do is define your own relationship. Your problem comes when you try to do this in a realtionship with another who is not of the same frame of mind. Be an adult babe. Recognise your needs and take a view on your relationship. You both deserve better.
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Yes you do have a problem. It's obvious you don't care about your present relationship and want a new one with somebody else, and that's ok - it happens all the time....sad but true. Since you can't be faithful to your mate - your best bet is to end your relationship with him - and go and follow your dreams. This is for the best. Your unhappy and I can imgine he's unhappy too - and with you lusting after other men as you do - it's certain it's not going to get any better soon. Take care!
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Yes. you have. you have married a guy that you don't love as much as you thought you would. Be fair, tell him it's over, get divorced and continue your journey
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You don't have a problem, your just ready to be in a different place in your life, but be a stand up person and tell your husband and don't cheat on him wait til your divorced, he did'nt do anything but love you so atleast give him that respect and wait til you divorced before act on impulse. Good Luck to you both
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hmmm i think you are not satisfied with your husband thats why you are looking for other guys
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At the least your marriage has a serious problem. Bottom line is, if the relationship was good & you were compatible mentally & physically you wouldn't have cheated in the first place. I don't honestly think having fantasies is a problem, but if they're something you actually want to follow through on then you seriously need to get to the bottom of what’s wrong with your marriage. Could well be that you two are just not a good match.
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Your not inlove with your husband..I suggest that you go on a weekend trip alone somewhere and think..no phone calls or friends just by yourself. I feel you should leave the marriage its not working, for you to cheat there is something missing in your marriage.
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Yes i think you do have a problem. Not being a very good wife.
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Once you told him you "cheated". That means you felt bad about it. You are going to feel bad again. Don't do it. A good world needs to have rules. One of them, is "being true to your partner."
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you are just being yourself and trying to get the best out of life ,,go for it girl ,
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sounds like you are not marriage material. But thats ok. Sometimes people arent meant to stay together. I think before you venture out and begin a life of deceit you should at the very least tell your husband how you feel. Maybe start a dialogue with him about why you are feeling this way. You know, talk about your fantasies. Put it all on the table. You owe him that much. Maybe there is something missing between you and he. Maybe you and he dont communicate enough. You know getting married young isnt a good idea. You change over time. What you want at the time of marriage is not what you want in your late 20's/30's. Just be careful. Remember, you are playing with fire. Eventually you will get burned.
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You only have a problem if you don't let him know about this. In the long run, it will hurt him less if you just be honest. If he has to find out himself, that will be tremendously painful for him. Please be fair, he deserves to be with someone who wants and needs him, and him only. You may need to let him go. I wish you the best, and your husband.
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well as long as u dont cheat again i think its ok to fantasize i mean its only ur imagination and ur dreams but dont live out of them,ull regret it....
Moongrim 
Azlotto 
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