ANSWERS: 4
  • The fact that you're asking the question is promising -- it shows that you realize that your own attitude has something to do with the issue. If you study your own attitude (thoughts, feelings, etc.), you'll probably find that you harbor harsh judgments about not only your girlfriend, but everyone -- including yourself. You may have moral (possibly religious) views which are very strict, and you're finding it hard to avoid self-righteousness about them. This is very often the case with people who hold morality as a strict set of rules to be followed, rather than as a set of general guidelines designed to be helpful. Holding morality as a strict set of behavior rules is a sort of 'adolescent' level of moral development: most people grow out of this and find a more mature way to relate to ethical issues which includes the ability to forgive, to understand the complexities of "gray areas", and to appreciate that nobody is perfect. If your girlfriend is behaving herself at this point in her life, your challenge is to learn some mental flexibility and generosity of spirit. Doing so will help not only your relationship with her, but your relationship with yourself and everyone else.
  • Its not anything to do with her at all. Look at the judgements that you carry and their affects on you. Go within and sit with the anger and disconnection feelings. There is a gift from this. Own it as yours.
  • Because you are a judgmental dullard who doesn't want to understand her troubled past.
  • probably cause youre afraid she will do all that again

Copyright 2023, Wired Ivy, LLC

Answerbag | Terms of Service | Privacy Policy