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  • Listen to your wife. Such relationships are just asking for trouble. If you start down this road, then where will it end? More and more sex partners, which means more and more opportunities to catch some nasty diseases. Keep your relationship monogamous.
  • Dude you're venturing into dangerous territory. You don't know how you will react when you observe her in front of you getting satisfied by another man. It's a ticking time bomb of emotions you don't want exploding in you. If you have that kinky fetish just verbally share the fantasy with some role-playing but don't go there. It will break up your marriage.
  • She says it's cheating because she believes that. You aren't respecting her boundaries. Give it up or leave her.
  • Man you're SICK! You're THE DEVIL!! Hey can I bring a camera crew and tape it for posterity? Just kidding, look I wouldn't force this. Your wife has already used the *cheat* word, which indicates she ain't down with it. If you force this, it will ruin you two in the long run.
  • Sex is always okay... if it's agreed upon by all parties. The fact that your wife isn't down with it, should be a big warning sign that she isn't happy with the idea. Push her into this and you will probably live to regret it. Hope this helps.
  • Menage a' trois can be a good thing for a relationship, IF ALL PARTIES are on the same page. If your wife is in ANY way uncomfortable, going through with your fantasy can only bring harm to your relationship. There are many other things you can do to bring excitement into your sex life - perhaps you can find something you BOTH would like to do together.
  • Cheating requires deceit, and since you both know about it, it's not cheating. But, it's recommend and often leads to problems in the marriage.
  • If you both agree, it's not cheating, but it sounds like her conscience won't let her...
  • consent or no...out of question...u may not have any qualms , but i would... i would not want to SHARE my husband and i love him to the point i would not want to be with any other.. actually, i would be quite devasted and hurt that he would want too. no...feeding his sexual perversions could backfire and they would get worse ..... the next thing would be him wanting a FMF ENCOUNTER! to me it is immoral... NAH...i'd pass..
  • Wow, you should take it as a compliment that she doesn't want to "cheat" on you with another man just because you want her to.
  • It is not cheating if you give your wife permission to have sexual relations with another person. It is not adultery either. Open marriages have so real benefits provided you and your wife truly love one another and work at keeping your marriage within the confines of Biblical marriage. Read the book "Divine Sex" by Darwin Chandler. It can be purchased from Amazon books or you can download it from
  • Not sure that my opinion counts as I am not, strictly speaking, married. My gf and I have lived together for 10 years and have three children together - ages 7, 6 and 4. We adore each other but we don't want to be married. It may sound strange to say, but we are, for the most part, pretty traditional, but we just believe that we want the bond between us to be about us. Natural and elemental in a way, to use those words. With all that as premise so that you know where I am coming from, I can say that in the early years of our relationship. my gf and I did some things. She wanted to watch me have gay sex, so, very long story short, I had a gay relationship for a while. She would watch. (Not really my thing, but it felt pretty good and was not as bad as I thought it would be.) We also briefly had a three way relationship with another woman. Then you know what? The novelty wore off. A little guilt crept in, maybe. We wanted each other more than anything else. So we started doing things with just us. We went on vacation and had sex on the beach. It was great. We did things that were just about us. Not just in the bedroom to spice it up, but just the two of us. It meant more. It felt better. It was more fun, frankly. Then my gf got pregnant. It was unplanned but we were thrilled - only our third child was planned - and now we would not dream of having anything other than monogamous sex. Listen to your wife. It is not, strictly speaking, a violation of your marriage vows if it is consensual, but what you are thinking of sounds better than it will be in fact. I won't lie, some of the sex was amazing - and it was a turn on to see my gf being banged by a guy. Until it wasn't. Luckily it never seriously strained my relationship with my gf in those years. However, I can also tell you, looking back. it was lost time and lost intimacy. Not worth it.
    • officegirl
      Why don't you all like marriage?
  • If she is happy with your relationship as it is then she wants to preserve that happiness. Which is probably why she does not want to go there. Now think about why you want that. If it is just because you think it will turn you on then don't you want to use her for porn? Are you ready to share her affection and enjoyment with someone else? If she acquiesces she might well resent you for pressing the issue. Perhaps even if she does not. Also she might become interested to a greater or less extent in someone else. We are not made of stone but we are very susceptible. So please think about such things.

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