What is the proper way to refer to an ex's family members?
by 
Cathy Mathews
ANSWERS: 7
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Good question, here is an example of how I would do it: brother in law - "my ex-brother in law" or "a previous brother in law"
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You divorced your EX so he/she is your EX but you didn't divorce your in-laws so they'd still be referred to as in-laws.
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Good question, here is an example of how I would do it: brother in law - "my ex-brother in law" or "a previous brother in law"
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I would use the phrase 'my former brother-in-law, sister-in-law, etc.'. This establishes the fact that the exact family connection has been severed, but 'de-links' it in a way from the actual divorce; you have divorced your ex, but not necessarily his/her relatives. I am still very close to my ex-husband's sister and consider her a good friend. When I speak about her to others, I don't like to refer to her as simply a friend; she also used to be a relative.
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My mother is still on good terms with my father's parents, 13 years after they divorced- she refers to them as the 'out-laws' :)
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If you have children, it is easier to use them as the link - for instance Johnny's grandmother, Johnny's aunt, Johnny's father (instead of my ex-husband). This sounds less negative than ex - especially when you still have a good relationship with them.
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Whatever their names are. For example, if their names are Jack and Jill, refer to them as Jack and Jill. They don't have or need any fancy official titles.
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