ANSWERS: 14
  • No, it doesn't excuse it. Nothing does. People are responsible for their own actions, whether they are sober or drunk. (Any light browsing of law will show you this.) After all, he is the one who chose to drink. You can choose to FORGIVE him for his act, of course. You can also choose to continue the relationship. This is entirely up to you, and I think you should give yourself some time before you decide how you feel about it. Please take into consideration whether or not he is willingly accepting full responsibility for his actions before you decide whether or not to trust him again.
  • I guess that depends if the admittance is followed with correction. Is he in treatment for alcohol abuse? If not, it is just a lame excuse and a great way to avoid responsibility for his actions. You must also consider, what happens next time he drinks?
  • DaNg tha sucks but yeah he knew what he was doin its na like he got hipnotized he could of stopped if he truly like you.
  • No, it does not make things right to admit to having a problem. Being drunk, you are still aware of your actions, but lose sight of your ambitions and character. Even if he is sincerely sorry, he needs to do more then blame some problem, you can still love him, but he needs to prove to you that he is sincerely sorry.. he can not blame drinking.. and then ask you to love him again, Im sure people who drink, will tell you, that they are still aware of the things going on around them.. Nothing just happens, people make them happen, don't blame the alcohol, blame the weak mind. You need someone who loves you even when he's intoxicated.. and i know people who have drinking problems but still maintain a good sense of themselves to control themselves.
  • First off, don't let HIS actions make YOU feel inadequate. You are not inadequate. When my boyfriend cheated on me, it is easy to think "if I was _________, he wouldn't have cheated" However that was me internalizing HIS issues.. Love yourself, and don't let his actions change the way you feel about yourself. Alcohol can cloud the brain, leading to do something you regret the next day. But it is not an excuse. The ONLY way you two can work through this is if he takes responsiblity for his actions 100%! You will have a hard time trusting him, so he will need to show you through his actions that he is trustworthy. If he stops drinking and stops putting himself in situations ( like hanging out with other women while intoxicated) I would think he is sincerely trying to regain trust. Good luck!
  • No, No, No. Oldest excuse around especially when it comes to a cheating incedent.
  • Alcohol removes inhibitions so that you do things you actually want to do but don't usually have the nerve for. One man may cheat under the influence, but would never steal or get violent. Another might get violent but would never steal or cheat. And people often drink heavily to give themselves permission or an excuse to do things they actually want to do.
  • I've noticed something about people who blame things on alcohol....I'll discuss that a little later on. First of all, alcohol is NOT to blame. Why? Well, everyone I know remembers what they do while they are drunk. Also, if you are so drunk that you CAN'T remember what you did, you probably can't get an erection to have sex anyway. So, why don't you tell him that if he's going to lie or make up an excuse, tell him to say something remotely plausible or credible...then perhaps it would be even worth staying with this guy. You mentioned he's sincerely sorry....I'm sorry too that you have to deal with this person; however, people who blame things on alcohol will end up blaming EVERYTHING on alcohol and other things...alcohol is just really easy to blame. "I didn't mean to hit you, I was drunk." or "I didn't mean to gamble all of my money away, I was drunk at the casino." or "I'm really sorry that I yelled and cursed at you, I was drunk and out of control." Wow, what a lame excuse. If he's the kind of person that's going to be untrustworthy in this way, nevermind the alcohol-blaming, but just his character as a person, a man, and a boyfriend (even something possibly more serious in the future), I suggest you reevaluate yourself (as in don't feel inadequate and devastated), reevalute the relationship, and reevaluate him, objectively. So, NO the alcohol shouldnt be even a subject of the conversation and you need to understand that you should NOT feel inadequate or devastated. You're better than that....so much better than that.
  • If he was drunk then you really can't hold it over his head...you said you feel that he was really sorry then you should forgive hi. I'm not saying his not to blame but it is alot harder to put it all on him when he wasn't sober...I mean if you were drunk and got mad and broke up with him...wouldn't you want him to take you back?
  • well this exact thing happened to me about a year or so ago. my boyfriend went to a party and got drunk, and kissed some chick. he didnt even remember what had happened, his friends had to tell him the next day. i am glad he told me, instead of keeping it a secret like some men do. honestly the thing that PISSED me off the most is that he got drunk enough to the point where he didnt even remember what had happened the night before. NEVER once did he use the alcohol as an excuse. he did not say "I was drunk, i am sorry." he just said "I am sorry, i am an asshole, and i swear i will never do it again." so i told him i wanted to go on a break. after a few weeks i decided to give him a second chance. i think that little break really helped a lot for both him and i. it gave me a chance to think things through clearly, and it gave him a chance to miss me, and really realize what it would be like to lose me. he still goes to parties, but he will only drink one drink. im not going to lie, it took a LONG time to work through it, and it was VERY hard, and i felt like giving up at times. it was very hard to trust him again, but after some time i did. and i know he will not do it again.
  • I'm not sure if i have the right answer, but, if a person uses alcohole as an excuse,then they will always have an excuse to do it again,correct? also,find out why he cheated on you.and no,alcohole is not the answer.Was she/he goodlooking and came on strongly? maybe he has a fetish he's to ashamed to tell you?
  • It would only (maybe) be a valid excuse if it was the first time he ever tried alcohol. As it is, you shouldn't feel bad about dumping him. Good luck.
  • No its not an excuse, really there is NO excuse for cheating. I had the same thing happen to me last month, he said he was drunk and expected me to forgive him straight away..he also is sincerely sorry, I know how you feel..it does take a while to overcome, but you will get there, if you need any further advise on what to do you can email me. gimme_cookies69@hotmail.com Hope your feeling better soon. =]
  • It explains, it does not excuse. If someone misbehaves under the influence of alcohol, they will do it again and again unless they give up alcohol. You have three choices: 1. Live with it (bad idea, IMO), 2: Get him to give up alcohol, 3: Dump him. Up to you.

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