you should make her s

You must respect your daughters wishes, she is old enough to make a choice of her own, and if she does not want to go to his wedding and would rather spend her birthday doing what she wants to do then she should be able to do so, after all it is HER day, your Ex had 364 other days in which to have his wedding and I think he is very thoughtless and selfish to chose his daughters birthday as his wedding day...I think it is a bit weired!! I would also advise that you have a word with his new wife about her attitude towards your daughter, kids are not stupid and they know when someone doesn't like them...all I can say is congratulations for getting away from this selfish man!! Good luck to you and your lovely daughter!

Keep the child away from That woman if she dislikes her.Be with her.Give her the Love she wants with proper attention.

And you listen to a 10 year old. Look I am not sticking up for the new woman nor am I saying your ex isn't a bit of a creep for choosing his daughters birthday to decide to marry his new girlfriend However have you even given any thought to the possibility that your daughter is a spoiled little brat who is upset that your husband isn't getting back with you so she's making up stories about his new wife. I am not saying you should force her to go to his wedding if that isn't what she wants but have you even thought to ask your ex about what is going on that she feels like this woman is mean to her? Maybe it's something to think about before jumping to conclusions.

I think I'd do a little investigation before I decided what to do. You are going to have to make decisions civilly with your ex and his new wife if you don't want to spend your life in misery. Why don't you ask her to lunch in a neutral place and get to know her a little bit? I wouldn't take your daughter along, as you know the new wife is going to try to make herself look good in front of you. Just get to know her a little yourself. Then maybe do it again in a couple of weeks with daughter along and see how they interact. It will put the two of you on better footing together to make parenting decision together. Like it or not, she's going to have an influence on your daughter. But if you get on good footing together and even become friends, it will be easier. I've seen truly horrible stepparent/parent relations. I've also seen situations where the stepmother and mother became friends. The stepmom was there for every school event and every recital and picked up the slack when mom couldn't be there. They respected each other and got along. Trust me, that is a much better place to be than in court or mediation every other week.

I think you need to let your ex-husband deal with this. Perhaps he can smooth it over with his daughter. If not, let him deal with her hurt and wrath. I wouldn't get involved between them.