I wouldn't necessarily "force" manners on them, but I would try to do my best to instill manners in them while I had them with me.

My house, my rules, they will follow them or face the consequences, it is our job, to teach them, not force them.

If it is only two weeks out of the year, trying to make up for 50 weeks of bad behavior I think is impossible. I would be gentle, kind and try by example to show her "this is the way we do it here". I would be loving. Trying to "force" anything on anyone is a mistake I think..you'll only get resentment and that isn't going to be helpful. Good luck! :)

you can influence this child just as much as his parents can.. you're related by blood after all. in my family, the elders have the last say. if his mother or father, your own child, can't enforce proper behavior on your grandchildren, then i would calmly suggest to the parents that there's something to be done. the child not only reflect on his own behavior, but the behavior of his parents as well, which also reflects on the people who raised his parents. it's your house, your rules. if you're doing your family a favor by letting your grandchild stay with you, then they should return you the favor by reaching a compromise. i would not let this go.

i think i would definately try my best to get her to be saying please and thank you. dont be too hard on her or you wont be able to enjoy your 2 weeks with her, but try your best to teach her things in a fun and caring way x

Yes, its your home and they better listen to you..its for respect.

I would insist on manners while at my home. She might learn something!

"I'm sorry, but when you are in my home, you follow my rules."

Make them understand when they are at your house you have guidelines. Set them and insist they are followed.

My grandchildren all understand that while I want them to have fun at my house, they have to follow my rules which include good manners. It was difficult with the oldest because he wasn't at my house much when he was small, but after a couple of visits he understood and has been great ever since.

If you love your grandchild you will try to teach her some manners while she's with you. Otherwise, her social life is going to be very limited. Someone needs to help her.

Force or teach? Big difference! and the mentality that may have attributed to her lack of manners in the first place? Its all about the mindset... Turning force into teach would make a world of difference. Don't you think?

yes i would force manners on them! everytime i had to go to my grandma's house i had to be on my BEST behavior or else i would have gotten turned on her knee. i still use my best manners for my grandma's house and i'm only 22!

WHen in someone's house, you obey by their rules. A 6 year old with few manners is typically the one who gets glared at even though it is the parent's fault. Maybe your loving firmness will lower the glare count!

instead of FORCING anything of them. i'd try and set a good example.

Force manners its your house! and having manners is better then having none at all!

GOOD question. I would first of all talk to Mommy and Daddy about this behavior. They are SUPPOSED to be the primary source of discipline to any child. (NOTE HERE: Discipline means "Training expected to produce a specific character or pattern of behavior, especially training that produces moral or mental improvement." Discipline is NOT punishment.) Now, the discussion with Mommy and Daddy should be straight forward and address your concerns. Don't beat around the bush. Find out what they think is acceptable and what is unacceptable for their child's behavior. Having them put this into words will focus them on the issue at hand...the acceptable behavior of the child. You don't want this to devolve into an argument, after all. After determining what THEY think is acceptable behavior, you should tell them what YOU think is acceptable. This should come as no surprise to at least ONE of the child's parents, because I'm making this assumption that one of them was raised by you. Now, there are two choices from here on what to do: 1) Establish what YOU expect will happen with respect to enforcing YOUR standards in YOUR house. 2) Establish what YOU expect will happen if these standards cannot or will not be met. You can work these out together (ideally, this is what should happen), but the bottom line is that if you get no help from them in this matter then you will have to step up to the plate as Queen of your Castle and enforce your standards. Good luck! I hope things work out OK.

At first, I wouldn't say anything -- give it a day or so after she arrives to see how she's doing. If she's not minding her manners, then you sit down with her and tell her that you love having her visit and you want to have fun together, but here is the short list of things that you expect in your house. Make your list a short one, correcting the worst of the mistakes she's making. (Let the more minor things slide for now). Tell her that if she really works on those things, you'll have a special surprise for her at the end of the two weeks. Then, save your biggest and best treat (nice dinner out, amusement park, shopping trip with you, trip to the toy store or whatever) until that last day. Remind her during the week if she starts to slip that she has that surprise coming if she'll mind her manners. And, praise her when she does well. Don't expect a miracle in two weeks, but I am pretty sure you'll see an improvement

"Force" manners on them? No. But I would want my grandchild to understand what was expected of her in her grandma's house. But not at any stage make it personal by way of comparing your expectations with those of her parents.

I appreciate the suggestions that are kind. We ended up watching some youtube videos on manners. While she argued with me about why she would need to do them, who does and does not do them, etc. (not nasty arguing, just a not understanding arguing) while we were watching them, when Papa came home from work, they worked like magic. She started calling us on anything we did that wasn't exactly what the videos showed, ie, elbows on the table. lol She's doing better. She's a lovely little girl, just has not learned table manners and other things like that.

Establish that the rules are different at Grandma's house now.....let her know what you expect, then see that she abides by those boundaries. She will love you for it and hopefully will follow your example and will enjoy her visits more. Teach her in a nice Grandma way, and you won't need to force anything.