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  • go rent a canoe - pack a lunch. it's different and you 2 can talk the whole time.
  • At one time, I made candlelight breakfast-in-bed AND candlelight dinner-in-bed about once every two to 3 weeks. It didn't have to be any special occasion. It worked fine "Just because . . ." If you never did it before, PLEASE DON'T "experiment" the first time or two. NOTHING ruins any kind of meal faster than thinking of and treating your partner, spouse or significant other as a "guinea pig". AND you don't even have to know how to cook! How? Get take-out from that favorite restaurant or fast food place OR Serve your favorite convenience foods: pizza, pasta, etc. Frozen waffles or pancakes - cooked according to the package's directions. Frozen dinner entrees - cooked according to the package's directions. AND serve it as though you made it at home: On THE BEST of everything - using your BEST china, linen, silver and glassware, DON'T forget to "set the mood"! When it's just the two of you, something as intimate as breakfast or dinner in bed: With flowers. Candles - yes, even in the daytime! Your (as a couple) favorite music! or the one you're serving the meal to. AND each other! For the sake of the younger folks who might read this, I won't get very graphic. You can use your imagination. You never make love TO that person. You make love WITH that person. I AM A VERY fortunate man. I had the wonderful experience of seeing my parents, both sets of grandparents and all my aunts and uncles behave as though they were constantly on their honeymoons with their spouses. They would hold hands, cuddle, hug, kiss, whisper things to each other, say, "I love you, _____!" and carry-on like many young people, who are in love, do in public. They would smile at each other and tell each other How beautiful, wonderful and thoughtful she was! AND How thoughtful, wonderful and handsome he was! WOW! What a great set of romance and romantic role models! No, I never watched as they were making love in the most intimate way, but I DID see and learn from their examples and inter-actions with their spouses! As far as I know, no one ever cheated on the other. That being said, one day my mother's father asked me to take him to the track. He "LOVED those ponies"! He was well-aware of the relationship I had with the lady I was dating and who would one day be my bride. He said words similar to these: I know your father told you what to do, but did he ever tell you how to do it? I answered, "No". He went on to say, "I'm going to tell you some things I don't think you'll learn from any one else. When you have sex, make love or whatever you want to call it, you don't behave like most other men. Most men are just interested in one thing and one thing only - satisfying their own selfish selves. That's NOT the way to do it. You have to make absolutely certain she is satisfied. No matter how long it takes or what you have to do, you have to do whatever it takes to make sure she does what she likes to do best. You HAVE TO satisfy her first. Your brain is the most important sex organ. Your brain controls what happens downstairs. When you aren't sure about what to do or how to do it, ask her what she wants you to do. She'll tell you or she'll show you. When you're making love, you think of other things - not what's going on at that particular moment with that particular lady. When you think about what you're actually doing, I guarantee you'll never satisfy the lady in your life. He went on to explain about holding hands, hugging, kissing, caressing and taking things one step at a time. He described a lot of things I heard of but wasn't sure about. During that ride, one of the last things he said was: When you are absolutely sure she is satisfied, then you can do what you know is best for you - but not one minute before. Thank you, Gran'pop. I love you, Gran'pop. I miss you, Gran'pop! Rest in Peace, Gran'pop! Some afterthoughts: You could also buy a book, on-line, called "Kama Sutra." You could also go on-line and make the investment in some "adult sex toys" or movies to stimulate and arouse. There are LOTS of sites. The following true story might give you a few ideas: TRUE STORY - as told to me by my friend, Joe B.: Joe: work, work, work, work AND work some more! He was ALWAYS tired. NO time to spend with his girlfriend, who later became his bride. One evening he came home from work. Flowers were on the table. Candles lit. His favorite music was playing. His favorite dinner ready just for him: pizza from his favorite pizza shop. Flowers and petals going up the stairs - a sort-of "path" leading to K.D., his beloved. He walked in the door and noticed ALL those nice things (except the pizza, which was in the fridge). "Honey, I'm home." K.D. 'sang', "I'm up hereeerrrrrrree." He "didn't stand an ice cube's chance in Hades"! He walked-up the steps and she "ambushed" him. He didn't go right to sleep that night or for quite a few nights after that. Following their romantic interlude, within the next few days, they talked about those things which were bothering them about their relationship. Having a very frank discussion and "pulling no punches", they "opened the door" to, with and for each other. When an impasse was reached, they got a few trusted friends (I was one) and their minister involved. Eventually, their differences were straightened-out. Thanks for asking your Q! I enjoyed answering it! VTY, Ron Berue Yes, that is my real last name! Sources: My wonderful family! My friends, J. B. & K. D. Was in the Food and Beverage business over 26 years. "THE University of Hard Knocks" also known as ("a/k/a") "life's valuable lessons"

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