ANSWERS: 5
  • You husband feels used and betrayed - YOU BLEW IT. Your husband is hurt and feels used. He's moving on to someone who can appreciate him in the good times and the bad.
  • Sometimes life is just very painful, sorry. Of course, nobody here can solve your circumstances... you have to sort that out for yourself. But, I suspect that you're looking in the wrong place for your basic sense of being satisfied and whole. You can't always solve the circumstances, but you can -- at least in theory -- always return to the source of your own self and be released from the torment of anxiety, pain, longing, and desperation. If you were married 25 years, you're now at an age where developing a deeper understanding of this topic can appropriately become a priority.
  • It sounds as though it's time to get satisfaction from your own company. To be your best friend, and find all the things you really like to do. Perhaps in the pursuit of this, you will meet people you can safely love.
  • I'm wondering which man that you are most depressed about. It sounds like your estranged husband was your second choice but since I don't have more detail, I don't know. Maybe your estranged husband thinks this, also. You say that you love him in a way. What I think that you should do is to spend some time to get to know yourself better and to look into your own heart to try and understand what you want. We can't make someone else's heart love us but we can learn to love ourselves more.
  • A distorted mindset (that's how I describe such things as anger / sadness / depression) comes from not getting what you expect to receive. When people say 'let go,' it means to stop expecting so much or expecting anything at all. Not that you might not deserve it. You may very well deserve a lot. But things are as they are. Refocus your attention on you, on someone you may be able to help, or on the best of what you have to offer anyone anywhere at any time. And you can offer a lot no matter what anyone might say. Also, it's hard to not to allow thoughts of someone - especially one you've been with for so long - to become aggressively cyclical, or what everyone else might label as 'obsessive.' You might want to try and get help with that, or maybe find some on your own via books or support groups. I'll send you a prayer. god bless.

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