It ultimately depends on the attitude he presents to any perspecitive employer, as well as his education and / or life experience. If your boyfriend is willing to work hard, has a desire to succeed, and wants a better life for himself, then that's half the battle. If it's all about him being negative, and giving up without trying, then he's already settled into proving himself right by failing and having less. It will help him to regularly attend Narcotics Anonymous meetings to hear others speak out and for him to express his own misgivings about his future. If this is a relationship you intend to remain in (for now or forever), it's would be worthy for you to attend meetings too. Look into a Co-Dependants group to start to learn your own limitations in being with someone who's abused alcohol or drugs, where you're likely to make excuses for their behavior. You don't say how old he is, but there's certainly nothing wrong with being a waiter. If he's older, he'll have a tough time competing with the younger people who typically work that kind of job. As a waiter, he has to be on his feet and on the go, sometimes work double shifts on command or out of necessity when bills are due. He also has to be happy about everything that happens in order to bring in the tips required to make a living on what is an otherwise lowly salary. If he takes his life path seriously, he will learn how things work, then take advantage of moving up when other opportunities become available. The restaurant or hotel service industry has plenty of jobs for anyone willing to work their way up, and those that start at the bottom make the best managers because they know the jobs below them. Perhaps one day he could look to own his own establishment, after doing it for a period of time, and learning what's involved to make it work. Anything is possible with a dream. If he has no plans, he's doomed to return to what he knows, regardless of the risk. It's important that you understand, it's not up to you to take care of him or make everything all right. He has to come to that decision on his own. If you're riding him to do better, or "bitching" as men like to call it, it will only serve as an excuse he'll use to blame you later for his short-comings. I am not accusing you of doing this, just be careful how you support his efforts, because your dominance might cause him to slip into "take care of me" mode, which you'll gladly accept. That is, until you're tired of it . . . Next thing you know, you're the only breadwinner, cause he's given up trying to meet your hight standands. Not that you should lower yourself, but be clear now, before you find yourself in a position with limited choices, and unable to leave easily - pregnant before it's time, or financially tied to him. Know what you'll willing to put up with and stick to it when it comes up. Otherwise you being the only one willing to make it work will kill your soul . . . I'm sorry for writing so much, but I speak from my own life experiences. I have no regrets really, but I feel deep remorse from having lost so much life and love over the years by "being there" for those who never had it in them to return that emotion back to me. Just YOU take care of YOURSELF! It's all you've got and can depend on.

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