Arkansas state trooper pulls over a pickup truck on I-40. He says to the driver, "Got any ID?". The driver says, "'Bout what?"

how about these?

http://www.boreme.com/boreme/funny-2007/conan-the-interrupter-p1.php

http://www.explosm.net/comics/1282/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/1269/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/346/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/603/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/777/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/1271/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/1245/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/357/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/1006/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/1012/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/1021/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/1022/ http://www.explosm.net/comics/492/ So I went just a tad crazy....

Blonde In First Class There is a blonde on a plane to New York. She is sitting in the first class section, but her ticket says that she should be in the coach section. A flight attendant realizes the blonde's mistake and asks her politely to move. The blonde won't move. All she says is, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York." The flight attendant goes and tells all of the other flight attendants. They all try to persuade the blonde to move, but she won't move. All she says is, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York." The flight attendants go and tell the pilot about the obnoxious blonde. They tell him the only thing that she says. He puts the plane on auto-pilot and whispers something in the blonde's ear. Immediately, she gets up and moves to her normal seat. Then the pilot goes back to fly the plane. The flight attendants are all very curious about how the pilot made the blonde move so quickly. They ask him and he says, "Oh, it was easy. All I had to do was tell her that the first class section wasn't going to New York!"

Funniest GIF compilation... LOL http://www.ibeatyou.com/competition/0b4fa9/funniest-gif

http://funny-stuff.fateback.com/ Hilarious photos

What does every Tickle Me Elmo get before it leaves the factory? Test Tickles.

The Fishing Trip Barack Obama was out jogging one morning along the parkway when he tripped, fell over the bridge railing and landed in the creek below. Before the Secret Service guys could get to him, 3 kids who were fishing pulled him out of the water. He was so grateful he offered the kids whatever they wanted. The first kid said, 'I want to go to Disneyland.' Barack said, 'No problem, I'll take you there on my special President's airplane.' The second kid said, 'I want a new pair of Nike Air Jordan 's shoes.' Barack said, 'I'll get them for you and even have Michael Jordan sign them!' The third kid said, 'I want a motorized wheelchair with a built in TV and stereo headset!' Barack was a little perplexed by this and said, 'But you don't look like you're handicapped.' The kid said, 'I will be after my dad finds out I saved your ass from drowning!'

... browse this ... http://www.joe-ks.com/ __________ A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Wyoming when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?" Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?" The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP Laser Jet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves." "Well, that's the exactly right number, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" "You're a Congressman for the U.S. government," says Bud. "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?" "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you, you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are, and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. Now give me back my dog."