21 is a bit young IMO, you haven't even begun to experience being a adult yet. Having a child these days requires a little planning if it can be done. That said, your not even married yet the benefits at this point are minimal for you and your child. Basically if things don't work out your boy friend can just walk away from you and your child and life as you know it will change for the worst/difficult. I would think long and hard about this before have a child. People are always better off being settled down and established before having a family....good luck.

You didn't tell your boyfriend that you're not on the pill anymore??You're not mature enough to have a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship and you want to raise a child???Good luck with that.

It is not a matter of age! Don't bring a child into a your false world.

So you are telling your boyfriend a lie, correct? Anything that comes from telling lies is going to be fraught with many problems..say, for instance, he leaves you because you lied to him? I'd tell him exactly what you are doing immediately. :( As for whether you are too young, you should have grown out of the stage of telling lies to get what you want and you haven't done so..so yes, I think you're too young! :(

The question should not be on age but whether or not YOU can support this child adequately if your boyfriend left you. The fact that you cant tell him you are not on the pill shows a lack of maturity and dishonesty - not a good start to a relationship that is suppose to handle the difficulty's of raising a child. Are you able to give your child the best childhood with what you currently have - regarding job or education. If not I would say YES you are too young and need to develop some life skills before trying to raise a child .

You're not too young but you are definitely not mature enough. Your bf says, "If it happens it happens." When does he say that? After you've got him 'worked up' while he thinks you're on the pill?????? Okay, now I've let off steam I'll try to say something more useful. Women think "Cute little babies". Men think "Need feeding, clothing, schooling = lots of money = lots of hard work and no guarantee I'll have time to see the baby anyway = little time or money for myself even though I am working very hard for many years to come." Why don't you think marriage is important? What is marriage (besides a piece of paper)? Can you describe what marriage is good for, without mentioning the words 'love' and 'commitment'? Okay, can you elaborate on the word 'commitment'? If you really value the baby (and a good relationship with the (defacto?) in-laws, you'll hold off from having a baby for a year or two, and you'll also spend some time with his parents finding out exactly why they think the way they do. This will not be easy, of course, but they will appreciate sincere enquiries. Have a cuppa with his mum every now and again, ask questions, say very little, just shut up and listen to what she has to say. Take it slowly, do not rush. Make sure you are the one that puts the kettle on and makes the cuppa. You might even want to ask your mum why his mum thinks the way she does and find out whether or not your mum is accurate. (She might be, I don't know.) That'll do for starters.

Maybe i should have said that we have been together for 3 years and lived together for 2 years, we are very happy, an both want children sooner rather than later, Yes he does not know that i have come off the pill, but at the end of the day he never wanted me to be on it. As for his parents, they think we should wait till we are in our 30's which i think is far too late i want to be able to enjoy them. I also want my mum to be able to enjoy them!

I don't think you're too young but I do think you're being stupid. No offense. A baby deserves to be born inside a loving marriage with parents devoted to each other enough to want to make a life-time commitment of marriage. Also, you're lying to your boyfriend and what kind of trust and respect will that gain you? Wouldn't it be wiser to discuss marriage, let his family and yours bond and THEN have a baby that will have two sets of loving, doting grandparents? Get your priorities in order.

I personally believe that it is maturity issue. Now if you have thought it out, have the money, the job, the education then I think you are ready. But raising a child is 24/7 job and children are not cheap. If you havnt gotten your education complete of your money in order I would think again. I would sit down and have a long talk with your boyfriend. Personally he should be your husband, not your boyfriend when you have your baby.

I think you are playing with fire. Lying to your boyfriend about birth control is likely to destroy your relationship. Are you ready to have and raise a child on your own? Even if you are do you think it is fair to your boyfriend or your child to start out dishonestly? You won't be "falling" pregnant. You will be tricking and scheming to become pregnant. Big difference. The first thing that having a child will require of you will be to give up your own selfish needs and to put someone else's first. You aren't demonstrating a high degree of proficiency for this by putting your wish for a baby above all else.

lol... your lying through your back teeth to the one your suppose to be in love with and want to have a baby with... correct?... thats the way to go!

I assume you have a trust fund with which you will support your child and yourself and that you will use it to send him/her to college.

Basically; you are LYING and DECIEVING your boyfriend .. almost as bad as CHEATING ... IF you were to get pregnant by TRICKERY like you are trying ; it will probably RUIN your relationship and you will be alone to raise the child. Do you even know or care about the expense of having a baby OR are you just planning on having welfare take care of the cost at taxpayer expense ... NO OFFENSE; just wondering .... With the world in the shape that it is today .. the economy etc ... unless you can really AFFORD to make a really good life for a child ... put it off until things are better financially ... AND; your boyfriend wants a child also ... +5