It is possible, but if the abuser is not willing to get help with his/her problem (and I mean seriously willing) then I would not wait around for him/her to change. Even if he/she is willing to change, I would recommend a separation while the abuser is getting the help. No being alone with him/her until they can show that they can control their temper and violent inclinations. Also verify that the abuser is actually receiving the treatment and not just lying to you about it. (Many abusers will do this if they are not serious.) In short, abusers don't usually admit that they are doing anything wrong. It is always someone else's fault (usually the victim's). Unless the abuser is willing to take responsibility for their own actions and really change, then it is up the the victim of the abuse to get out and do what ever is necessary to protect themselves from the abuser. This often means going to the authorities and pressing charges. If the victim is not willing to do this then the cycle will continue and could keep getting worse until the abuser kills the victim.

Sure, but it's rare and few who will change. It takes admitting the problem and most don't see it as their fault in the first place, because it's how they've grown to accept having to live their life. It's deep within them, something they're accustomed to using to deal with their difficult emotions, and it will take intense therapy to help them learn how to better resolve their conflicted emotions. Again, most are not willing to accept it as their problem, but instead find it easier to blame someone else for them having to be violent, saying they've been made to be violent or that they wouldn't leave them alone or listen to them. If this person's family suffered with anger and violence, it's what was learned. Although it didn't work and they know that, it's also what's comfortable to them to do - because it's all they know. They can't be loved enough to make them stop fighting themselves. This only causes more pain for them, because they don't feel worthy of love and will resist it. It just causes more conflict for them. It's best to not try to help them. Sorry, but it will only attach you to the problem in the worse way. This kind of pain is a killer . . . Really! In addition, if alcohol or drug abuse is part of the problem, this adds another layer to be dealt with. It's just one more excuse to be used by them when they're violent or abusive, because they don't want to admit that's a problem big enough to give up, and in their mind it's not causing the problem anyway - they believe it's making them feel better about their life.

sure, but it will take some serious work. The first step it to make it known to them that it cannot happen (jail,or getting hit back). if someone is abusive to you then tell someone who can step in. The best thing to do is to stop ignoring it and get some profesional help.

Only if they want to. You can't do it for them.

Please, Please If you are asking because you are in an abusive relationship please walk away, it doesnt matter how much you try you can not change the abuser. PLEASE WALK AWAY

They will change once you start being submissive

Ok...If you are in one walk away but yes they can be changed. It just depends on how hard they try.You have to knock sense into them.They don't realize they are hurting you.Personally it is VERY hard to change them.you may love them a lot but that doesn't matter if they don't back. I'm Sorry!

Sometimes, not often. There are help groups and anger management groups. If you can convince the person that they need help without getting busted up. In the meantime if you are in this kind of relationship are you willing to stick around and take the abuse and punishment on the off chance that the person will change? If you have children this danger is even more something you should remove them from mentally and physically. Seeing their mother abused is a lifelong memory

They need to be separate from the one/s they are abusing and get long-term professional help.

Barring a miracle from God (which does happen sometimes), I would say no. By their own volition, no. Cannot happen. Has to be a radical spiritual change, or not at all.

it can happen if they admit what they doing and see that they have a problem and get help but i my personal experience no they dont one an abuser always and abuser.

Yes, but it is something they have to constantly work at so they don't fall into old patterns.

Yes, it is possible. It is not likely, though. As long as you stay with him/her, he/she is learning that he/she got away with it. You will never change the situation through enabling. Tough love might work. Often, the person doesn't learn the lesson until they've lost the person they abused. That's pretty much what happened between my ex and I. (Actually, come to think of it, I don't know that he ever did learn the lesson...) If you are interested in seeing the ways that abusers are treated, I highly recommend Dr. Steven Stosney's work. You do need to protect yourself by removing yourself from the abusive partner's presence (physically, as in physical separation) until he/she can ensure your safety. www.compassionpower.com

With a lot of counseling and therapy there is hope.

Never had one, so I don't know.

No. They cannot.

Very few exceptions.

not without something big happening. I think if the person they were abusing all the sudden flipped and just kicked the shit out of them, this might trigger a change.

2 of my sisters have been abused by their husbands.. the other one only stopped after my sister has given birth and my sister scared him by telling him if he ever hits her again, he wouldn't see his son coz she's running away. the other one stopped when i shouted & threw a pillow at him (the 3rd time he hit my sister) and told him that i'd ask my parents to tell my sister to leave him and that he had no right whatsoever to hit her coz even our own parents never laid a hand on us.

Yes-they escalate.

No. It's just a vicious cycle 1. violence 2. asking for forgiveness 3. then violence again 4. then asking for forgiveness again

In order for an abusive person to change 2 things need to take place. First the abused needs to realize they are worthy of being treated so much better than they are and make a concious decision not to tolerate the abuse anymore. If that means leaving or fighting back or whatever is necessary so be it. The abuser has to understand their behavior is no longer acceptable or tolerated. That however is just part of the solution. The next part is the abuser has to come to terms with the fact that they are wrong in what they are doing. Once they realize how wrong their actions are it will be much easier for them to accept the fact they need to get professional help if they ever hope to change the pattern of abuse. Once both of these things have taken place there is a good chance the abuser will change. Of course there are some who can not change but only because they choose not to change. If someone really and truly wants to change a bad behavior they can do do.

I don't know, I wouldn't stick around to find out.

The person has to WANT to and then they have to willing to seek help and stick with it. Otherwise, NO!

If the underlying issues are addressed then yes, otherwise no.

Everyone has a chance to change their lives, but the question is are they willing to and what steps are they taking to do so. Are they getting counseling, anger management, and working through some of their issues or are they just saying they will change with no real effort. Too often it is the latter, and no real change is made. You can tell when someone is committed to actually changing something major in their life or not.

NO NO NO NO!!!!!!! BTDT...almost lost myself along the way

I suggest you pack up your stuff or their's, somebody has to leave. One more thing, stop by the police department or dial 911. =)

I think anyone can change, but they have to want to change. No one else can force them to change their ways. It has to come from within and they have to seek professional help.

NO- It is always someone else's fault. His explanation will be YOURS, but it's NOT!!!!! GET OUT NOW!!! That is from experience!

Everything is possible only if you believe and pray very hard about it