I am in love with my brother-in-law. I am married but am in love with the brother-in-law. What do I do?

Move to West Virginia. That kind of thing is expected of people in that state

Get over it.

Please I have cousins who did this to each other and the family broke up...Stay the F---K away from him..you need to stay away and find someone else..You will destroy yourself,sister and so forth..You will not have a family....And he will have a laugh..Go to church and talk to a clergy and see a therapist, they will help you..

I am in the same situatin, I am married 14 years, I have been in love with my brother in law over 8 years, never told anybody, but each time he is around, I don't see anybody else in the room but him. he understands and listens to me, but that is it.

I am in love but can't do anything about it. it will just remain inside of me. I think that he is in love with me too, but doing the same thing.

when we are together, some times we couldn't hide our feelings and everybody could see how happy we are.

my daughter once told me " mom you look more happy with my uncle than with my father"

that is when I told my self that it is time to stop. and stopt talking to my brother in law.

no matter how much you love with your brother in law, you are not going to be as happy as you think you would be with him.
go back and keep the one you have and make as a best brother in law with him.

get a divorce because if you love someone else other than your husband, its not fair to him. then move away as far from them as possible. thats just my advice. start over. do you really wanna be responsible for destroying a family? cause thats what could happen.

Wow, 6 billion people on the planet and it just so happens "the one" for you is taken, and by your own sister at that. What are the chances?

It may feel as if you cannot choose who you love, but actually, we make these choices on a subconscious level. People want what they cannot have simply because difficulty makes achievement so much sweeter psychologically. This man would not be nearly as interesting or amazing to you if he were divorced and living alone.

You realize you are intentionally creating suffering in the life of your husband and in the life of your sister. Is that the best you've got? If you are a religious person, you are breaking a commandment. If you are not a religious person, you might want to talk to a shrink about your deep-seated sibling rivalry.

I have been in love with my bro in law (husband's brother) for over 2 years, and had an affair with him for 2 years. My husband and i were seperated (after 7 years married) when it all started. His bro was going through his own divorce at the same time. Some time AFTER my divorce, my x husband found out about the affair. He was really angry with both of us at first. Ironically, my x husband has since forgiven me, and has rekindled a relationship with me. He said it's my "last chance." He has made me promise not to stray. And he says we will get remarried. Well, it has been really difficult because I love his brother, and his bro loves me. His bro calls me often, and turns me on with just the sound of his voice. When I am with my x husband, i picture myself with his bro just so i can get off. His bro keeps trying to get with me, even though he knows that i am back with his brother (my x). What i have done is committed myself to one man, my x husband, because i made a promise to him. I explained to my B-I-L that this affair must stop, and that we have to be strong. When i become tempted, i think back to the time when my hubby was drunk, trying to eat pizza, and was crying his eyes out... it's a visual thing that breaks my heart. I promised myself that i would never hurt him again. and i know this is my last chance, and i don't want to blow it. I just hope that i can continue to be strong. Just the other day, his bro about beat my door down trying to get me to answer. And i had to pretend i wasn't home, all in effort to keep from cheating. Also, when i get tepted, i just run to my hubby and give him all the affection that should be his and only his.
My advice is, don't become involved sexually, because that only complicates matters more, and will make it even harder for you to figure out your feelings. Take it from me, i have been in love with two men for a long time. At this point, i'm trying to keep us all from getting hurt.

So why did you marry the wrong brother in the first place ?

Wake up!! Chances are you aren't in love with the brother in law. You are just having a fantasy about him. He seems oh so perfect compared to your husband. I am not sure if this is your husbands brother or your sisters husband either way you would be a total home wrecker if you were to persue anything with this man. Get a divorce if you don't love your husband and then start dating but leave your brother in law ALONE!!!

Spend some time thinking about the best case scenario if you make a move with this guy. What do you think the impact will be on the family - that's two marriages in one family that you will be destroying.

Also, what is the situation in the family? My BF's brother-in-law flirts like crazy with me I think cause he has some kind of competition going with my BF. I have no idea what would happen if I responded to the B-I-L, but frankly, it's a family situation that I don't get involved with (beyond reassuring my BF that his B-I-L's flirtation has no significant meaning to me).

Are you kidding?

You really need to talk to your hubby first and then go from there.

This question makes me feel sad for you and your family.
:(

Divorce your husband and marry the bro-in-law. Nothing changes, you keep the same last name, the same old in-laws, same driver's license, same old sister-in-laws, if there are kids, the kid's uncle will be screwing their mamma, kids don't have to change last names, keep the same old monogrammed towels and dishes. Man, it don't get no more redneck than this!

is he in love with you? that being said, if you do not love your husband enough to be faithful to him you should not be with him...i would give this some deep consideration because chances are if you divorce your husband for his brother it most likely will not work out...'the grass is never greener on the other side'...you may lose them both and cause a lot of heartache in the process...if you leave your husband do it for yourself and your husband and forget the brother

Sounds like a really bad soap opera. When does the evil twin come in?

Screwed! lol News at 11:00!

call jerry springer!

I love my brother-in-law as much as I love my husband. He is probably one of the reasons why my marriage is still together.I have been married 28 years.The last 2 years have been a no sex at all marriage.My brother-in-law has never dated nor married nor is he gay.As far as I know he could still be a virgin and we have not nor will never have an affair with each other.My husband and his older brother are very close and I know how much he loves my husband.All three of us spend time together going out to eat,to the movies or staying home watching TV.He is very different than my husband most of the time and it is refreshing to have someone be attentive and courteous.Also,there are times he even sets good examples for my husband as to how to communicate and treat others. When my husband is too self-absorbed,I can rely on my brother-in-law for good conversation and a joke now and then.Our children are grown up and have their own families,leaving my husband and I to do our own things.My brother-in-law has become an important part of our marriage.We don't talk to each other without him.We don't go places together without him.And this is mutual,I have been out with my husband alone and hated it,couldn't wait for it to be over and he acted the same.My brother-in-law seems to fill an emptiness my husband and I both have.And as we get older,we are all over the age of 45,I hope we will strengthen our bonds.

Listen leave you brother in law away from you, there are two families in this situation..do not break two families.Just ignore your feelings it can be just a crush and not love

You need to face reality. Even if you were to get a divorce, chances are you'd never have a chance with the brother-in-law. Even if you had a chance with him, it would probably be a fleeting, sweaty chance that you'd later regret. Oh, and just think what his mother would say. If you respect your mother in law, you won't try to destroy her family, even if you no longer want to be a part of it.

Move to West Virginia. They have state laws there that require all of the residents to be in similar relationships. In other words, everything in WV is a family affair

You are flirting with disaster.

Stay away from this person, do not be tempted.

How can you do this to ur sister ?!Do you know anything about morality?You love him,he loves you,that's fine but why do you cheat on your husband/spouse ?! Get divorce first and then let your husband/spouse find someone they deserve and go to have a new life.But for God's sake how can you cheat on ur husband and ur sister at the same time?!

Be grateful for the man you have, the one you are married to. An attitude of gratefulness will help more than anything. Your feelings for the brother-in-law may pass soon. Also, consider the moral issues. It's just wrong to covet another's spouse.

give up, you are in a totally hopeless situation. unless of course you sleep with him and decide you hate him which is what will most likely happen if you do, but then your marriage will be completely ruined. so decide.

Divorce your husband and marry his brother.

Oh boy, I totally know what you're going thru!!! I'm in love with my brother in law as well..The only possible difference with you is that he knows about it, and feels the same way about me... So we're both just kinda kickin back and seein what happens...We haven't done anything, we've only kissed a couple times, but it feels way to perfect....

Your sister's husband or your husband's brother? I would be very careful.. The "forbidden fruit" is always the sweetest, but there will be fall-out. Your use of "Love" instead of "wanting to fuck" is a concern.

But wow, that is hot to think about.

Since you are a married woman, you may "love" your brother-in-law only as your brother-in-law and that is all to it. He is the husband of your sister and all you can do to give him your respect and regard and give them your blessings for a happy live together. Therefore your fantasy must end immediately. It is good for all the parties concerned.

How does HE feel?

you are an idiot, why didn't you marry him instead? you have a choice. if you are a weak person to who commitment means nothing then get with his brother... if you are a strong person who stands by her commitments then distance yourself from him as best you can.

That's something for a shrink. I hope that doesn't offend you. I feel for you. That's something you really need to work through with someone.

Best of wishes.

Is it your sisters hubby or your husbands brother?? Either way its so bad!! people are so selfish today.. be happy with what you have already or leave and let the person you are lying to live his life with someone who truly loves him...

I know the situation you are in...I am in the same place as you...does he feel the same for you?

well if you are in love with him and he is with you then get divorced and be with him

You have to think long and hard about your life with your husband, as oppssed to a life with your brother in law. It's not all about who we love it's the ramifications too. I myself is in the same position but would rather live a lie for the childrens sake, I gave birth to them after all so it's my duty to look after them. My B-I-L isn't married and has grown up kids and a granchild but agrees with me.

It's not what we want it's what we have to do for others we chose our paths we have to follow them and not go down a wrong turn.

Forget about it. Do something to keep your mind from even thinking about him, or that way. Make sure you do not ever tell him that you are in love with him. I don't know if kids are involved too, but just think of all the damage and pain you would cause if you were to act on those feelings. Keep it to yourself and look at your own husband; either in a new way or remember the reasons you loved him enough to marry him; again. Whenever you start to think about your brother-in-law, stop it by thinking about your own husband by doing something with him or nice to or for him.

WOW. I am Super sorry for you.... you are like a soupsandwich......which is a big'ol'mess

argggghhhhh i so feel for u. i am in the same situation and i love both of them (they are brothers) in different ways. we both have kids (and grandkids) to consider and our affair has been going on for over 20 years but its the whole tearing the family apart thats stopping us leaving our partners. i want my b.i.l
near me 24/7 but i still love my hubby 2 and its not just lust b4 u all say it

It is my sister's husband. We have been together several times and the more I am with him, the deeper I fall in love. He is an amazing person inside and out. Very respectful of me and he really is a good man.

Stay loyal, if you TRUELY want your brother in law then you need to get a divorce. dont cheet on your husband. PLEASE dont cheat. he dznt deserve that, it will just cause drama for everyone. :(

sounds like your about to open up a can of worms....nothing good will happen if you act on this. You would be best to stick to your vows, or get a divirce and go somewhere else...what you are looking at here can not only be devistating on the entire family, but it can also be deadly dangerous!!

well i think that you are right to love him, you have to let your love lead you but as you are married and so is he it will be best to keep your enotions to yourself

You shouldn't have gotten married then. No. NO NO NO NO NO. If you are in love with someone else you shouldn't be married to his brother. Divorce and move on.

What is wrong with you? that is your SISTER'S HUSBAND!! I do hope you realize eventually that your love for him will only destroy your sister's relationship and your relationship to your husband as well. Screwing around behind their back is consider to be a betrayal. Blood is thicker than water and when men come and go you have no one but your family! Leave your sister's husband alone and stay with your husband.