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I am in love with my brother-in-law. I am married but am in love with the brother-in-law. What do I do?

By Anonymous Asked Apr 18 2008 9:02AM
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Top Answer out of 45

by Mrs Anonymous -HM on Jan 14, 2009 at 7:07 am Permalink

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Get over it.
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Avatar vera city Jan, 16 2009 at 06:26 AM
exactly!! fall in love with your own husband and stay away from the man you are crushing on.
Avatar Mrs Anonymous -HM Jan, 16 2009 at 06:30 AM
Agreed!
Avatar Dave2222 Jan, 24 2009 at 12:33 AM
TAKE A COLD SHOWER

Answer 2 out of 45

by Catherine on Jan 16, 2009 at 6:27 am Permalink

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Please I have cousins who did this to each other and the family broke up...Stay the F---K away from him..you need to stay away and find someone else..You will destroy yourself,sister and so forth..You will not have a family....And he will have a laugh..Go to church and talk to a clergy and see a therapist, they will help you..
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Answer 3 out of 45

by Twisted Taco on Jan 14, 2009 at 7:05 am Permalink

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Move to West Virginia. That kind of thing is expected of people in that state
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Avatar vera city Jan, 16 2009 at 06:27 AM
twisted taco!!! that is so ... geographically biased and unfair and wrong and dead on! ha ha

Answer 4 out of 45

by CluedOut on Jan 14, 2009 at 7:27 am Permalink

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This answer was last edited on: Jan 16, 2009
Wow, 6 billion people on the planet and it just so happens "the one" for you is taken, and by your own sister at that. What are the chances?

It may feel as if you cannot choose who you love, but actually, we make these choices on a subconscious level. People want what they cannot have simply because difficulty makes achievement so much sweeter psychologically. This man would not be nearly as interesting or amazing to you if he were divorced and living alone.

You realize you are intentionally creating suffering in the life of your husband and in the life of your sister. Is that the best you've got? If you are a religious person, you are breaking a commandment. If you are not a religious person, you might want to talk to a shrink about your deep-seated sibling rivalry.
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Avatar CluedOut Jan, 14 2009 at 07:38 AM
Thank you. I sometimes wonder if people are making this stuff up. Is it really that difficult not to screw over your own family?
Avatar Sanguine Visions is wearing ninja garbs Jan, 24 2009 at 12:33 AM
Trust me, it's difficult for some people. My brother started dating my ex when I was trying to get back with her.
Avatar JND...IsHappy Jan, 26 2009 at 07:05 AM
It looks like people are just desperate.

Answer 5 out of 45

by niznj on Jan 14, 2009 at 7:30 am Permalink

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get a divorce because if you love someone else other than your husband, its not fair to him. then move away as far from them as possible. thats just my advice. start over. do you really wanna be responsible for destroying a family? cause thats what could happen.
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Answer 6 out of 45

by sassyj on Jan 24, 2009 at 12:14 am Permalink

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I have been in love with my bro in law (husband's brother) for over 2 years, and had an affair with him for 2 years. My husband and i were seperated (after 7 years married) when it all started. His bro was going through his own divorce at the same time. Some time AFTER my divorce, my x husband found out about the affair. He was really angry with both of us at first. Ironically, my x husband has since forgiven me, and has rekindled a relationship with me. He said it's my "last chance." He has made me promise not to stray. And he says we will get remarried. Well, it has been really difficult because I love his brother, and his bro loves me. His bro calls me often, and turns me on with just the sound of his voice. When I am with my x husband, i picture myself with his bro just so i can get off. His bro keeps trying to get with me, even though he knows that i am back with his brother (my x). What i have done is committed myself to one man, my x husband, because i made a promise to him. I explained to my B-I-L that this affair must stop, and that we have to be strong. When i become tempted, i think back to the time when my hubby was drunk, trying to eat pizza, and was crying his eyes out... it's a visual thing that breaks my heart. I promised myself that i would never hurt him again. and i know this is my last chance, and i don't want to blow it. I just hope that i can continue to be strong. Just the other day, his bro about beat my door down trying to get me to answer. And i had to pretend i wasn't home, all in effort to keep from cheating. Also, when i get tepted, i just run to my hubby and give him all the affection that should be his and only his.
My advice is, don't become involved sexually, because that only complicates matters more, and will make it even harder for you to figure out your feelings. Take it from me, i have been in love with two men for a long time. At this point, i'm trying to keep us all from getting hurt.
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Avatar local_lad Jan, 24 2009 at 12:18 AM
Thats a good answer! and looks like its straight from your heart. I hope that it works out for you, good luck!

Answer 7 out of 45

by Waiting for Illumination on Jan 14, 2009 at 7:24 am Permalink

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Spend some time thinking about the best case scenario if you make a move with this guy. What do you think the impact will be on the family - that's two marriages in one family that you will be destroying.

Also, what is the situation in the family? My BF's brother-in-law flirts like crazy with me I think cause he has some kind of competition going with my BF. I have no idea what would happen if I responded to the B-I-L, but frankly, it's a family situation that I don't get involved with (beyond reassuring my BF that his B-I-L's flirtation has no significant meaning to me).
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Answer 8 out of 45

by Anisa on Jan 16, 2009 at 6:24 am Permalink

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I am in the same situatin, I am married 14 years, I have been in love with my brother in law over 8 years, never told anybody, but each time he is around, I don't see anybody else in the room but him. he understands and listens to me, but that is it.

I am in love but can't do anything about it. it will just remain inside of me. I think that he is in love with me too, but doing the same thing.

when we are together, some times we couldn't hide our feelings and everybody could see how happy we are.

my daughter once told me " mom you look more happy with my uncle than with my father"

that is when I told my self that it is time to stop. and stopt talking to my brother in law.

no matter how much you love with your brother in law, you are not going to be as happy as you think you would be with him.
go back and keep the one you have and make as a best brother in law with him.
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Answer 9 out of 45

by Froggy on Jan 24, 2009 at 12:19 am Permalink

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So why did you marry the wrong brother in the first place ?
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Answer 10 out of 45

by VS Angel aka Mrs. Stealth Intelligence on Jan 14, 2009 at 7:10 am Permalink

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Are you kidding?

You really need to talk to your hubby first and then go from there.

This question makes me feel sad for you and your family.
:(
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I am in love with my brother-in-law. I am married but am in love with the brother-in-law. What do I do?

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