My boyfriend texted his ex-girlfriend to congratulate her on her pregnancy, but he was secretive by not telling her who the text was from, just "an old admiring friend who misses you..." Is this flirting or any reason to be angry at him?
by 
savannah21
ANSWERS: 25
-
Thanks, Auntie Em, for your response to my question. I wasn't able to add more details to my question, but no, he did not tell me about the text, which is why I thought it a bit odd.
-
I recently found 2 texts sent to my boyfriend, from a female friend of 20 years. One stated that she loved him and the other implied that they should just have sex and "get it over with and stop playing games."His explanation was that she's been misinterpreting his attempts to help her with personal problems as flirting or sexual;this was not his intent.She will not leave him alone and calls and texts him constantly even though he told her to leave him alone. How do you deal with people like his "stalker"?
-
You shouldn't be angry as anger will not help your situation at all. It does sound like your boyfriend is quite the compliment giver, though. I also think he's lying to you about that friend of his. 20 years? Yeah right he told her to leave him alone. You honestly believe that crap? Are you kidding me? He is a charmer, a flirt, or whatever you want to call it. You might as well face it.
-
No maybe he didn't want to stir up any old memories or sentiments but genuinely was happy for her and her new life? I would not be upset by this If he were speaking with her on a regular basis then I would have a talk with him
-
It sounds like he loves attention, and not only from you, from anyone that will give it. It is possible that it is just harmless flirting, but it may lead to more at any given time with any given girls. Odds are, most girls he meets don't know you even exist. If I were you, i wouldn't waste my time on a man that cannot fully commit. Unless you can put up with that kind of BS forever, walk away befor eyou get in too deep.
-
Calm down, I hate girls that get all caught up with their BF's ex's. I hang out with my ex's alot, and my GF can get over it.
-
May be he is seriously missing her. That is natural. Take it easy. Friendship can not go away that easy.
-
I think it is a reason to be angry at him, but not a reason to break up or end the relationship. He was probably not correct to text the ex-gf (depending on their relationship and how you fit in), but saying it secretively and in a suggestive manner is definitely wrong. I would make my position very clear to him, tell him exactly what you think, that you think it is wrong and flirty, and then leave the issue to die. This isnt something to end a relationship over. How did you know he texted her? Were you searching through his phone? If yes, that is also wrong as you are invading his privacy also. Tread carefully, but make your position clear. Then move on.
-
If you are in a long term relationship, simple flirting has to be expected. Like it or not. Either make it long term, or focus on non- important things that will never happen!! Good luck savannah 21!!
-
The fact that he misses her would upset me if I were you. You need to talk about this with him.
-
Him saying he is an old admiring friend that misses her would bother me.
-
I dont think its a problem, why do girls always get pissy about this stuff, damn are men not suppose to have any female friends...omg!
-
yes I think it is flirting. A lot of guys will do that even if he doesn't like her. My brother did that a few months ago and i told him that that was wrong. Sorry honey
-
Oh my! I would not be happy about that!
-
No one can tell you how you feel about a situation. If you are angry at him for doing it then sure be angry at him. If you don't really care then don't fake anger for effect. Honesty works the best. If you are angry at him though, yelling won't do anything good. Just let him know why, and then tell him what he can do to fix the problem.
-
"An old admiring friend who misses you"? I would be upset. Do you know about this ex girlfriend? If it was out of the blue that he contacted her, or you didn't even KNOW he was talking to her, I would question this. Either way, the way he responded when she asked who it was is upsetting. Him saying that is not a good sign.
-
sounds like he needs the confidence boost.
-
What are you doing on his cell? Trust issues here.
-
I would be extremely angry.... if they weren't on a long-distance friend-only basis.
-
Aw how stupid, shoot if he doesn't tell you and communicate, and he does that, its probably his baby in the first place. You need to communicate, and by communicate you need to be blunt and to the point that that is not ok. And yes, absolutely do you have a right to be angry. However, when you talk to him, be respectful and understanding for your own sake, because it could be something unknown. But if he doesn't spill the beans about everything regarding this, then by all means kick him to the curb.
-
I sware women will try to find anything just to be able to fuss with their boyfriend or husband. Could you just lend out a little trust to him and give him a break maybe he was trying to be nice!
-
Actually I would think the girl would think the guy is either creepy, because the guy doesn't id himself and she could think it's a guy who liked her and didn't do anything before and/or desperate, if she figures out who it is because it'll probably sound like he wishes he had a life with her. Is she marrying the sperm donor? Does she know who it is? It's weak flirting and you should be mad at him not for flirting but that he seems to think your relationship isn't up to par. Does he want a closer relationship? Does he want your babies?
-
i wouldnt get mad because he text her because my ex used to text me but the fact that he said he missed her. my ex tells me all the time that he miss me and shit he would always try something i think thats exactly want your boyfriend is trying to do or maybe im wrong
-
I think theres more to this story on your part then his part. Tell us again how u inspected his cell phone and found out this text again. That'd be nice to hear. Oh and while ur at it, remind us why he shouldnt be angry at u for invading his privacy. U really shouldnt be too angry, but then again its a text so the true intention of what hes saying is unknown. He could be flirting... but flirting with a woman that got pregnant over another man?? idk that sounds to sketchy, i think it was just a congrats thing.
-
I wouldn't describe this as flirting. To me it seems a fairly human reaction to finding out that someone you were once close to is expecting. & the fact that he deliberately didn't say who he was shows he wants to maintain a distance. Of course, if she has his number on her phone already that’s all a little bit pointless. I would say to him that 'you would have appreciated it if he'd told you about it.... as he has nothing to hide (in that tone of voice only a woman can do)'.
RELATED QUESTIONS
Copyright 2023, Wired Ivy, LLC