Why is it so hard to love after being hurt so many times? i want to love him but i cann't
by 
Anonymous
ANSWERS: 6
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I dunno: Self-preservation? Respect for yourself?
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maybe you get bored form him and you know that he is going to hurt you again, i think you want something new in ur life......
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I don't think loving someone is something that happens because you "want" to..I think you either love someone or you don't. I'd say you just haven't found the right someone so far. I've never tried to talk myself into loving someone because I don't think it works that way! :(
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Your defense mechanism kicked in. You are trying to protect your heart from being broken again and it's tough to get over that when it continuously happens - and it WILL continue until you let go of the hurt (fear). You are going to attract pain because you'll subconsciously react to certain situations cautiously and not openly and authentically. Trust yourself that you can pick a partner that will treat you good and trust yourself that you WILL bounce back from being hurt and trust yourself that you're not afraid of personal growth. Eventually, your fear will subside.
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because you've lost trust. you can;t have love without trust, you need to learn to fully trust him.He needs to earn your trust. You feel vaunrable and are starting to expect the worst, youre waiting to be messed about, you feel if you love/fall in love with this man then youre open to be hurt, letting someone in is risky and takes time. It will work if its meant to, you will love him, say it when youre meant to. It'll be natural.
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I think it helps to see the things as they are, to remember the times when someone hurt you with hurtful words or lies, and see them just for what they were, hurtful words, thoughtless behavior, nothing more...
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