I have developed a process for punishment that I think works well, what do you think? Child requires punishment I allow them to reach into a hat and whatever is written down is their punishment. Grounding, No TV or video games, laundry, cleaning bathroom.
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Epistaxis
ANSWERS: 17
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Sounds pretty good to me.
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Sounds kind of like "The Wheel" in Beyond Thunderdome. Not that I'm complaining, it's a good system.
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Sounds really good. Do you keep the punishment out till all of them have been gone though then put them all back, or do you just keep recycling them?
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That is a good idea,and you can decide what would be the best punishment for each one.
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Sounds like a good system to me. Do you think that turning laundry and cleaning the bathroom into punishment might be a bad thing, though? Like to where the kids get the message that doing laundry and cleaning are things they'll avoid in the future? That would concern me.
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I don't know how that accomplishes anything more than just giving out a punishment on your own. Does it make it easier for you or something?
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Instead of Answer Bag you have Punishment Bag. I don't think it is a bad idea, but I do think some infractions require a discipline method specific to the behavior.
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I really really like that. I not a mother but I gonna pass it on to all my mates who are...thanx
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It could work, but as Scubaduba said some actions do require certain punishment. A friend of mine has a system/chart that shows what type of punishment for each type of action that she uses and works quite well for her. With this her children know what will happen if they break any rules and so on and each type of punishment is designed for each child. One loves playing driveway hockey, it's his absolute favorite thing in the world so he knows if he does something wrong that it will be taken way from him, where as if it was taking tv away he wouldn't care either way as he'de rather be out playing.
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First you have to decide what is punishable. Dr. James Dobson urges, and I think rightly so, that you don't punish for irresponsibility and think twice about doing it for giving in to temptation, but that you do punish for defying your authority. One good thing about the hat is that it makes it unpredictable so they can't calculate in advance whether the costs will be less than the benefits. I had a kid who was always doing that so I always had to keep one step ahead of him by being creative in thinking up penalties that fit the crime and were unpleasant in unpredictable ways. Eventually he realized he couldn't outsmart his old man and gave up trying. When my five kids started hitting junior high, I did not have to raise my voice once to one of them in ten years. Thank you, Dr. Dobson! His book is "The Strong-Willed Child" and he has a radio program. Lots of other good books, tapes, and videos, too.
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This sounds reasonable at first glance, and might actually work, but my only concern is that the punishments would all have to be pretty equal in severity, thus meaning that the crime or act would all have to be equally bad. We all know that kids do all levels of bad things, therefore punishments should equal the crime and vary in severity. If they do something really bad, getting the same punishment they would get if they did something not-so-bad wouldn't seem like very much incentive to curve behavior. Otherwise I think it's very interesting.
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actually, I think that has its merits !
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the punishment should fit the crime
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Good idea. Then when they even *start* to act up, you could say "Don't make me get The Hat"! :)
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umm well isn't that like letting them play a game instead of having a structure of you break this rule you get this punishment? well, try it if you do not see it is working after 8 or 10 weeks then maybe trying a punishment chart would work better. but laundry and cleaning bathrooms should be chores in some way if the child is old enough.
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they're not punishments. what about walking barefoot on glass slamming a hand in a door breaking a beer bottle on their head. Now, they are punishments. :p
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I don't think that chores should be used for punishment. I got punished if I did not do my cleaning chores but cleaning chores were never punishment. If we did not do our chores then the next time we were not allowd to watch t.v or listen to the radio while doing the chore. We also had the punsihment fit the crime and they were different for each of my siblings. talking friends and the phone away form my sister was horrible.
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