Have you ever encountered a "sociopathic sex addict"? If so, what was the situation like?

the sex was wonderful which made me hang around for a long time. during sex i was made to feel like the most beautiful person on the planet but it was all a game.

I was dumped and emotionally abused continually and drawn back in by his loving words which meant nothing. Just out of it after four and a half years.

feel abused depressed and taken for a ride but i will get over it never get drawn in by this type of person they will wreck your mind, make you question your sanity and leave you not knowing how to trust someone again.

My situation was a bit different. The sociopath that forced her way into our lives went after my husband. She started by befrending me, through our children and their school. Before I realized it she was practically living in my home. she called and texted me constantly. There was always an issue, a problem, a tradegy. Being a nieve, giving person, I always fell for it and let her tag along where ever our family was going or doing. She was either extremely happy and energetic, or very depressed and needy. She would tell me what a wonderful friend I was, that I was the only one that truly understood her. She didn't know how she could get through her difficult times without me and my family. (she was getting over a supposedly devistating one time affair with a married man) Turns out she would have atleast one major affair a year, with lots of sex partners in between. The game was the main focus of her existance. She often times didn't even work. She would spend her days planning the affairs, sending out porn of herself to intice the men, etc.

Then I found out she had be having an affair with my husband. I was crushed beyond words. My husband and I had been having a down time in our marriage. I believe now that we still loved eachother, but neither of us was feeling the closeness or spark that we once had. she was extremely bold in her hunt for him. she knew exactly what to say and do to get him, he was blown away by her actions and fake feelings for him. He fell for it. But after a few weeks, he changed his mind. After 8 weeks of trying to break it off with her, it finally came crashing down. After some therapy, some time apart, and an enormous amount of self examination, we are back together adn things are going well. I still have a hard time with the betrayal. Regardless of who the affair was with, my husband is still responsible for his actions. It is something that I hope someday I can fully forgive. But I do understand how we got to that point. We have spent the past year focusing on the little things that had made our marriage great for so many years. As far as our nasty sociopath - She is still living a few miles away, focusing now on other families in the community. I have found out since my experience, that she has done the same thing to dozens of families. but no one seems to want to talk about it. I actually had one man tell me he was afraid for his families safety. She was a master of getting personal information from you. She would start up conversations with the intention of getting dirt out of you. But you didnt realize what she was doing. she would then blackmail you into keeping your mouth shut if you tried to expose her. With me, she would come to me sad about her husband (yes there is some poor soul that has been married, unmarried and re-married to this horrible person for 15 years) I would tell her about a difficulty that my marriage was going through and then try to help her see the bright side. But she would then take the information, alter it and tell it to my husband. She had him convinced I couldn't stand him and that I was leaving him as soon as the kids were grown.

Living around this woman is extremely difficult. Being the focus of whispers is hard. I never did anything cruel to anyone here. But I have learned a lot about what friendship really is. I know who my true friends are. I am harder now. Much colder and less caring of others. But I think that is ok. I have been walked on by many people in my life. It is about time I hardened up. I save my heart for only those who truly deserve it.

I pray every day that she will pay for the heartache she ahs casued me, and my family. As well as the endless list of others she has hurt. I am not sure if carma exists, or that good always wins on earth. But I do believe that one day she will be held accountable for her actions, and that she will spend eternity in agony. Of course knowing that her daily life is in constant turmoil helps too.

To all of you who are battling everyday to keep your head high and feel good about yourself remember, your strength and sucessful future means you have won and the sociopath has not. Learning about what a sociopath is, and how they manipulate people had helped me a lot. Educate yourself, spend time on sites like these. Knowing there are so many of these horrible people in the world is hearbreaking to me. But it helpes to know I am not alone.

I have encountered the very person depicted on this page, much to my dismay. I saw all the warning signs (those of the sociopath) early on, but chose to ignore them. It was same as described above. I was sucked into a FANTASY and once there, happy and content, I was cruely cast aside... only to be yanked back in at his whim - when he was bored with other women.
I was married, and lonely, and he charmed me into believing that I was sexy, special, and alive - "the one" for him. We met at exciting places and had secret sex at first, even in his office at work, then we escalated into a pseudo relationship and he made me feel that if I left my husband we would be together.(Yes, he said he wanted me, only later I realized that meant just for sex.) But soon he started setting up his background plan and making comments as to why we could never be together... his family would never allow it, etc. Our relationship went on for about a year, I left my husband in that time and am now almost divorced.
I don't regret the divorce, or really the relationship with the "idiot stick figure with no soul" - because I guess I needed this idiot to come along to help me realize that I can live without a man. The problem now is that he won't get out of my life. Even after I found out he was engaged to another woman in another city, had slept with multiple women in my city (at places we frequented)he still contends that he "loves" me. As we know, they are incapable of love, guilt, or remorse - so I know it's all a lie. I know that I don't ever want to see him again. What is tough is remembering the actual fun times we had. All the ways he loured me in by taking me fancy places, singing songs to me, sending me notes, etc. I can't go anywhere in town with being reminded of him in some way. I can't hear music without being reminded of him. It's horrible. he's moved back to the city where his intended fiance lives, probably married the poor girl (who also knew about me and what he did) and is continuing to email me every month or so.
I see his email in my inbox and cringe. It makes me physically ill and yet I still sort of want to see him - for the fantasy. I know I'd get sucked back in and nothing good would come of it. So. I've blocked him from email. Changed my phone number. I'm trying to find other music, places, and events that don't remind me of him. I'm creating new memories with friends and loved ones in places that we used to go. It's going to take a lot of time to get past this, but I will. I'm already starting to feel like my old self, and get back into my social life. I'm reading, exercising, and eating healthy.
And as for him - karma catches up to this type. He lives in misery every day not being able to feel real emotion like the rest of us. He's a fake and a loser, and he has to live with himself for the rest of his life - never satisfied. That must really suck.

There is no such thing as an encounter with a sexual sociopath. It's an all-consuming life experience that destroys your optimism, selfworth and ability to love. I was profiled, really profiled, many questions, so much attention, he was so interested in me...he was designing the minefield that would render my life HIS entertainment. The sexual perversions were endless, the implication of a real relationship was constant and full of clever disclaimers for later use in blaming me for expectation. I was submissive to his dominant, then I was nonexistent, then I was the submissive again, then a fuck buddy, then just friends, then forgotten for a while, then submissive. I spent 2 years off and on trying to anticipate what he wanted from me, what would make him love me. Two years blaming myself for his manipulation and indifference. Two years being slowly divided from what little self esteem I had at the start. Two years trying to get some validation but only getting phone or online or (rarely) real time misogynistic, abusive fuck which I believed meant something. I had no idea I was dealing with an empty vessel. I had no idea I could be abused and bent away from my own boundaries until I was spending all my time starving myself, taking pills, falling into intense depression while sitting in front of a computer screen waiting for an IM from a man to whom I was the "tree falling in the forest". I did not exist to him unless he was bored with other women, in the mood for me or looking to satiate his sadistic appetites.

I have been a risk taker, a wild girl living in a subculture where dying or going to jail was standard, the way being late for work or losing your glasses are standard for others. That life behind me, and it came at a price and with unbelievable effort, I stepped into a relationship with sociopathic sexual abuser that makes me wish for the "sweet life" of my felonious youth.

I don't know how long it will take me to get past it, but I will most certainly arrive there hardened, fearful and distrusting. Was the sex, or mostly mutual masturbation via technology, good? Who gives a shit. It broke me, left me rejected and obsessed with something that will never, ever have closure.

That's what it's like.

You can't win with sociopaths cos they charm you and they're clever and reckless with people. I'm charming and clever but I care too much to trample people in my wake. All I'd say on this is don't ever fall in love with a sociopath. It'll stain your life for a while and they're really sticky - like, even if it ends, they find ways to leave burrs in yr life and reopen the door
I didn't want to leave mine - I kept hoping he'd change and see the error of his ways. I believed he loved me but it was all a fantasy and I was blind to the realities...what a f*ck up.
Sex was amazing tho!! And I think I'll always love him a little...I can't help that. Won't go back tho...

Wow, from these answers it looks like all these posters dated the same exact guy I dated. From this I would say these sociopathic sex addicts are exactly the same person. The good news for us humans is that this would mean that they are VERY predictable, so we can watch for the signs and dump this guy/gal at "Hello".

Wow sybil, sounds like you met my husband...lol...I just realized tonight he's sociopathic along with being a sex-addict (I already knew about that part) I feel so stupid and I can't believe it took me this long to realize what sociopathic actually meant, and that people like this existed. He was charming in the beginning--made me feel like nothing could ever go wrong...then he started going out more, I was catching him running around with young girls, lying all the time, stealing my money, picking up streetwalkers, I had a daughter already when we met, and he was showing signs that she would have been his next victim. He had already perfected the art of convincing me to go to sexual extremes by the time I met him when he was 31--we started out swinging because he convinced me it would be fun to try; said he loved seeing me with other men...I hated it, and it made me sick to my stomach that I never even saw a flicker of jealousy in his eyes. I think it was the ultimate for him because he could experience my sexual satisfaction and see the degradation all at the same time. Once he got bored with me, he just started going in online chat and meeting girls to masturbate with him--if they were close enough he would meet them in real life. Cheating is one of his favorite games, and he loves getting caught. He would leave every single night as soon as I fell asleep, and try his damndest to be home and hide the evidence just before I awoke. OMFG it used to drive me CRAZY wondering why he would always end up leaving one piece of semi-obvious evidence. I knew he was smarter than that, just couldn't accept that anyone could get off on hurting someone so badly. And I had to make him love me. I couldn't figure out how he didn't when I gave him so much. Now that I have spent the evening researching this; it feels like my eyes have just been opened for the first time in 6 years. I finally know what I'm dealing with, and it's not my fault!!! I'm not a bad person, or un-loveable!!!!!!! I'm devastated that there's no cure because I have a son with him well as my daughter, but my son is only one and he's been a very happy baby and pretty affectionate, so I think he's more like me than his father. I hope for his sake that I'm right.

I fell for a socio-path two years ago. I too was taken in by his charm, charisma and the elusive promise of being together. I left my husband--and almost left my small children--to try to make it work; even though he lived in one country and I in another. Yes, the sex was great, but over time it escalated in a sadistic relationship with him wanting more extreme sex. I confused his desire for me sexually with love. I did not have a loving father and I'm sure that I believed that I could change him, mold him into the man who would make me happy. Two years on and he still swings like a pendulum between wanting us to work out and calling me very nasty names and telling me that his getting fired; not seeing his kids; getting a divorce is all my fault. I know that I am the architect of my own emotions. I choose to stay in the relationship b/c I am scared to be alone. The irony is I am alone. He lives an ocean away and I only see him on average about every two months. I changed my life for him; I am in debt; I have had to rebuild my relationship with my sons; and I am incredibly depressed and angry at myself for not being strong enough to tell him to Fuck OFF! I know intellectually that he is bad for me; when I envisage a future with him it is always, always black. But then he'll email me or call me and charms me back into his misogynistic world. I am fed up. I want to leave him. But, I am scared.....

No I haven't but I live in hope.

Wow... all of these answers sound similar to the sociopath that I met. It was my first year at college and I met what I thought was the most amazing person. He charmed his way into my heart within a few weeks. He was seemingly perfect. We started hanging out all the time and talked n. He made comments about traveling to where I live to meet my folks. One evening when he was walking me back to my apartment he mentioned that he already had a girlfriend, back where he lived. I was really surprised... but he insisted on continuing hanging out altho I was hesitant. When I asked him about it, he told me that she was not at all what he wanted and that I was so incredible and wonderful that he wanted to be with me. So, we started dating with me under the assumption that he broke up with her. He was absoultely perfect and I was so happy for a few months, he took me to meet some family over Thanksgiving break... It wasnt long before he started talking about marriage. He made me feel like I was the only thing that mattered to him. When we finished up our first semester at college we made plans for christmas. He was going to return to his familys house and then fly out to meet mine in a week. Over the one week that he was at home he got back together with his (Semi)-ex girlfriend and slept with her. I latter found out that she never thought that they broke up and was waiting for him to get home. Well, he was so amazing at hiding it that when he flew into MN to see me, I never suspected anything. He hid it so well, met my family and acted like his charming self. Over a nice candel lit dinner he plans on marrying me and staying with me forever.
We start the new semester and I still have no idea who I am really dating. Everything was going along perfectly when I get an email from his ex. Then little by little bits and pieces start to come together. I should have read the signs and ran. If you are reading this, never ever stay with someone who has cheated on you. It will happen again. You can imagine my shock and surprise when I found out. He made me believe that it was all a mistake and that he would " do anything for our relationship.". Once again he manipulated my compassionate tender heart into believing that he wanted me only. He said the sweetest and most touching things. So I stay with him and we finish out the semester. Now summer is upon us and I am getting really nervous about us being in different states. I let him know how worried I was about it. He would hold me and stroke my hair and tell me "you'll see you have nothing to worry about." He was so utterly convincing that I started to believe that everything would be fine. We went to out seperate homes for summer. I stay super busy working 2 jobs and taking summer classes. He plays the dutiful boyfriend role and calls me every single day and texts all the time. We talk on ichat every night. He bought me a plane ticket to come out and see him. That trip was so amazing...we had the best time. He took me to a jewlery and buys my engagement ring complete with wedding band. We start making wedding plans for the summer. We tell his family and friends. I was beyond ecstatic. I had never been happier... I never thought about what happened over christmas break because I believed that he had changed. I go back to my home state. He was in the ROTC and had an air assault school event that he went to towards the end of summer and drove 22 hours overnight to ask my parents for my hand in marriage.
It wasn't long after the start of our third semester at school that I found out what had really been going on. He had managed to start a pursuing a new relationship over summer. He picked up this girl and took her on dates, and latter admitted to flirting with her. Altho he never claims to have slept with her. He led her on for months without ever telling her that he was practically engaged. The point is emotional cheating is just as painful as physically cheating. When I confronted him initially he denied everything. Over about 2 months he finally tells me the real story, that he "has a problem with women." He is a self-proclaimed womanizer. I am sure that all men struggle with sexual fantasys but he had an exceptional case, he honestly couldnt tell what was the truth any more. He said that when he met me, he truly wanted to change but he just couldnt. He told me that he had never really loved me, it was all a game. He wrote me 2 letters telling me that he was a lie and a joke and that he knew it.
I am telling you all this so that you can understand that sociopaths are real. They are so good at lying that they dont know what is reality anymore. I know that my ex-boyfriend is miserable with who he is. He told me on multiple occasions that he wishes he could change but he cant and this is who he is. He told me that he would "wait for years for me to come back" after i broke up with him. He immediately started a relationship with a coworker. I honestly believe that he cannot help himself. He left me feeling crushed, betrayed and abused.

I know that this isnt as horrible as some of the stories posted but I felt that I could relate and decided to share my story.

I am severely broken after breaking up with my sociopathic bf. I new him from school. He moved back to town and I saw him at a restaurant. From that moment he later admitted that he was going to finally "get me."  from then on he stalked me, got me alone with him and manipulated me into thinking he was so nice and head over heals in love with me since highschool. Im 24 now. I was depressed at the time and i thought he was trying to help me. He was so lovely and caring and thought I was so beautiful. He said he had always loved me and thought i was amazing! Constant msgs, calls, emails, cooked me dinners, helped me with uni, long dmcs through the night - the works! I had a bf at the time and it wasnt really working so I left him and went out with the new guy thinking he might be "the one"! He also told me that he wanted to marry someone like me. 

I have always had strong christian morals and for 7 yrs would not have sex until I was married. But with him, the very first night, I said "no" to him feeling under my underwear and he kept doing it until i got up and he completely flipped out and said I "have fucked up boundaries" and he's confused and he turned over an wouldn't talk to me. That night I had sex with him. I didn't want to do it so soon but i didnt want to make him mad. I wanted him to still want me and think I was beautiful not be mad at me. I wanted him to desire me. So i thought, well "Maybe I do have stupid boundaries?"

The relationship from then on was about him dominating me. Holding me down while he had sex with me, trying to do anal sex with me when I didn't want to, trying to drug me to do anal sex, pinning my arms behind my back and trying to do anal, nagging me to sleep with him (normally) until I couldn't take it anymore. I cried during it once. He said it was my fault and I should have left and he thought my "no" actually meant "yes". He said anal turned him on cause I have never done it and would never do it. He wanted to be the first to conquer it. He tried to make me have threesomes with this other girl he fanticised about and constantly bragged about models that he manipulated and slept with. How he almost fucked his girlfriends step mum while his gf was in the house and said it was the gfs fault for being so naieve. He also bragged about How he gave them insecurities so he could bring down their confidence and have a chance with them. He hit on my sister and felt her up in front of me. It's like he didn't understand boundaries at all. He was tempted and the more difficult it was to get the more fun it was for him.

I don't know how I was so blind and listened to his never ending excuses for his actions. The warning signs were all there but I ignored them. I wanted to feel special and desirable and he used to make me feel like that. But his actions after he got what he wanted, made me feel jealous, insecure and inadequate. He got bored fast and told ppl he couldnt believe how easy i was to get And how it's just routine now. He was telling his ex the whole time that he still loved her and i meant nothing. I saw his phone before he locked it. He made out that i was the problem, too insecure and depressed and my negativity bothered him.  But i was always positive around him cause i could tell he didnt care about my feelings. He cheated on me with the girl he had been fanticising about. I left him and he's now with that girl. I am devastated. So hurt that I was used and he is just happy and moved onto the next victim. I know he will use her as well. Just another challenge. 

I think it's all because he was a loser in school and never had a girlfriend and never had sex. Then he got hot and muscly and now it's like he's getting revenge on women or something. I have suicidal thoughts but I am getting therapy and trying to hold it together. I am such a nurturing person and any physical thing i do is an act of love and my body is like giving my heart to someone. I only ever give it to ones i really love and possibly want to marry. He used it and threw it away. I think his step dad is a sociopath too and has been suspected of murdering his wife to be with one of the students he taught.

I am so mad at him! I dont kniw what to do. and want to get him back somehow. Do I act happy like I don't care? Show im Hurt? Get another guy? Tell the new gf about his personality disorder? Then I realized, he never did, nor will he ever care about me.