Ask a Question
or
Create a Poll
  1. Home /
  2. Questions /
  3. Relationship Advice
  4. / Marriage
  5. / Marriage Traditions

by mollyfriend on December 11th, 2007

mollyfriend

Question

Help answer this question below.

My husband and I had no beliefs when we were married. Now he's a passionate born again Christian who only wants to talk about God. I don't relate at all and feel we have nothing in common. I dont want conversion. We have three kids. Stay or go?

  • Like
  • Report
Share:
Other

Answers. 18 helpful answers below.

  • by weeniemuffin on December 11th, 2007

    weeniemuffin

    wow i don't know how i could handle that, but if you have other common interests or if he's still the same person, i'd try to work it out...if he's trying to push his new found religion on you, try to talk to him about it...

    • Like
    • Report

    3 comments | Post one | Permalink

  • by American idle on December 11th, 2007

    American idle

    It seems like people are always "passionate" about christianity..at first. If it doesn't die down, get moving. Nothing worse than a religious fanatic.

    • Like
    • Report

    3 comments | Post one | Permalink

  • by anonymous on December 11th, 2007

    anonymous

    Try couples counseling before you make any decision. It's worth a try.

    • Like
    • Report

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by peterpam on December 11th, 2007

    peterpam

    You should speak honestly to him, appeal to him with the bible which teaches us to care for our families correctly. Speak to the Pastor of his church and ask him to calm your husbands evangelical fervour down. He should prove his faith by being the best husband and father there is not by being a big mouth.

    • Like
    • Report

    1 comment | Post one | Permalink

  • by Meg is exhausted on December 11th, 2007

    Meg is exhausted

    It's hard when couples grow apart, and not together. If he's more interested in and concerned about converting you than seeing you as his wife and the mother of his children, that could potentially be an insurmountable problem. It's worth trying a counselor, though. However, I recommend seeing a secular professional couples counselor versus a religious figure, which he may push for. It needs to be neutral ground where both of you feel equally able to share, and if you are not religiously inclined, that will not happen at his pastor's office.

    • Like
    • Report

    3 comments | Post one | Permalink

  • by Anonymous on December 11th, 2007

    Anonymous

    You are unhappy, he is not respecting you as a person or your views...it is all about him, the kids know things are not right in the home..and it is unfair to them. Leave...get on with your life. You deserve to be loved and respected. The kids will be happier once they see you are happier. :)

    • Like
    • Report

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by HelloRe is anxious on August 27th, 2008

    HelloRe is anxious

    Try not to worry so much about his conversion. Look at it positively, he could be doing something to destroy your marriage. If you give it a chance you will probably find that what he is doing is definitely a good thing and maybe once you get past his change it will be easier to just listen to him. Ask him questions talk to him. Remember this is your husband who you looked at with loving eyes all this time. You have three beautiful children who deserve to see their parents happy. Converting your life to Christianity is like cleaning up your act and learning to live with humility and discipline. Things will work out great!

    • Like
    • Report

    1 comment | Post one | Permalink

  • by APACHEmeansENEMY on December 12th, 2007

    APACHEmeansENEMY

    Stay and try to make a compromise? maybe him talking about it all the time is just because its a new interest...he could mellow out in a bit...

    • Like
    • Report

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by buxtonite ..slowly losing my mind on December 11th, 2007

    buxtonite ..slowly losing my mind

    tell him to shut up!... really try it if he still carries on then tell him again to shut up as you DO NOT want to hear it ....if he starts again tell him if he doesn't shut up you and the kids are out the door... sorry but you must be firm and stand your ground ... tell him your fine with his so called born again stuff so long as he keeps it to his self because you do not want to hear it ... be strong and stand firm because he will become even more over bearing if you don't

    • Like
    • Report

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by allie on December 11th, 2007

    allie

    i agree with hawaii.jake. COunciling. It is always worth a try. And sometimes you don't realize but it is really hard on the kids to get a divorce.

    • Like
    • Report

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by Musterd21 on January 21st, 2008

    Musterd21

    Stay if for no other reason....the kids!

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by BrokeDog on December 11th, 2007

    BrokeDog

    I've seen this happen many times. The first thing is, do you still love him? Usually, if the couple truly loves each other, they can work this out, (thru counseling, compromise, and understanding). And, yes, the counseling does need to be on neutral ground, (tho' that may not be possible, you think religious counseling is in his favor, he will think non-religious counseling will be slanted toward you). But, it does need to be non-religious counseling. A good counselor will point out advantages of both sides.
    I am a Christian, but I do know what you are going thru. Try to realize that he just truly LOVES you and wants you to believe as he does. But, he MUST give you breathing room and allow you to make your own decisions. If he is absolutely not willing to compromise, it just may not work out.
    But, LOVE can find a common ground! Try to find that place, if not for y'all, then for your children. But, do realize, it will be tough at first. Just try and give it a little time, for your family's sake.

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by Anonymous on September 5th, 2011

    Anonymous

    I would stay and talk to your husband or better yet become a born Christianity as well.

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by lissy on April 23rd, 2008

    lissy

    I am in the same exact situation......he said to me he has to continue to try to convert me....he said he "can't just stand and watch me walk into an in coming train" I am tripping on the whole thing....it's like I don't even know him anymore and its actually pretty creepy......I am very torn and dont know what to do.....i am going to try counseling....but he wants to go to "religious counseling" as I call it......I feel like I should go. We have 2 children

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by kaylee on April 26th, 2008

    kaylee

    woah! calm down sweety! did you marry this guy because he was a non-christian or because of the person he is?! Even though he's a christian now it doesn't change the things that you had in common with him before hand. He's still the same man, just with a faith as well! Don't throw away your marriage over this!

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by woggy on October 11th, 2008

    woggy

    Take a look at this board; There are folks of both genders asking how to deal with a cheating spouse, an abusive spouse, one who does not seem to love them any longer.
    Ask yourself this: Would I rather be married to one of the guys that some of these ladies are stuck with, or with a man who has found a faith that teaches him to forgive even when it hurts?
    Would you rather he talk incessantly about sports? How about a guy that has a weekly diet of strippers or porn?
    A guy who digests a weekly sermon will make you and your kids better off.
    In time, you may feel an ability to relate when life takes an unforseen turn. In time, he will become more adept at explaining his faith to you.

    Give the man a chance; Give his faith a chance.

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by pleasant on August 27th, 2008

    pleasant

    You should definitely stay! That is so good that he is now leading you into a life of faith and trust. Thank him for living a clean life. If you loved "him" then, you still do now. Get on board with what he is doing now and your family will be much much happier.

    Trust me on this one.

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

  • by stepback123 on May 3rd, 2010

    stepback123

    It's not that simple folks. He's NOT the same person she married. That's the point. Religious belief and fanaticism are quite different. Often with male/husbands/fathers, the religious conversion takes on a very predictable self righteousness that invariably leads to condescension and condemnation of anything that is not godly "IN HIS EYES". Your opinion can only be the same as his from now on because he is right and you are wrong. Chances are 'religious counseling' will come from the church that got him to this fanatical state, and you'll find yourself in some black and white movie being told to submit to your husband's wishes by some TV like evangelist preacher with politician hair. It's always creepy when this happens.

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

Want to attach an image to your answer? Click here.

Did this answer your question? If not, then ask a new question or create a poll.

More Questions. Additional questions in this category.

You're reading My husband and I had no beliefs when we were married. Now he's a passionate born again Christian who only wants to talk about God. I don't relate at all and feel we have nothing in common. I dont want conversion. We have three kids. Stay or go?

Follow us on Facebook!

Related Ads

Related Questions

Professionally Researched

ANSWERBAG BUZZ

My fiance is a religious fanatic
Husband becomes religious fanatic
Married to catholic fanatic
Husband suddenly is religious fanatic
Married to a religious fanatic
What if i dont marry the person god wants me to
How do i explain to a born again christian i don t want to be born again
Success rate with marriage counciling
Non christian spouse born again
My husband wont work and he is a religious fanatic
Religious husband
My husband is a religious fanatic
Husband religious zealot
How to get divorced from a religious fanatic
My spouse religion fanatic
My wife is a christian fanatic
My husband has become a religious fanatic
Dealing with religious fanatic spouse
When souse becomes really religious
Can a person stay married to a religious fanatic

Answerbag

a Demand Media company