- NEW!
by sloroller on November 28th, 2007
Flatulence would be the only weapon I have right now.
by POLICE...IN HOT PURSUIT on November 28th, 2007
I would start with this....
by Voodoo on December 6th, 2007
I would stab him with my pen!
by little miss s on April 15th, 2008
my art history textbook .. he'll be out for days :)
by Babycakes on November 28th, 2007
My laptop.....whack right across the face....if I wasn't frozen in place with fear.
by Bob Vila 956 on February 19th, 2008
I would shoot my stapler at him then force feed him floppy disks, then shove my usb cable in his nose. And then when he stumbles around I'd shove his head on the copier and start slamming the lid down while I reached for the phone to call 911
by I'm a ginger on December 6th, 2007
The hammer that is under my desk?
by Mustache Wonder on April 1st, 2008
A rubber band.
by JTP on April 12th, 2008
I have my pick of:
a bronze statue thingy about 6 inches tall that is hard as a mofo.
my folding knife I keep clipped to my jeans.
a titanic model that took weeeeeks to build
or my fist
I'll go with the statue.
by Takei-Shihan on November 28th, 2007
I try to never strike first ... I would lure him into making the first move, then use a destructive defense that traps and breaks his arm (if he tries a hand attack) or I would evade while kicking and breaking the knee of his standing leg (if he tries a foot attack) ... if he has a weapon, I am surrounded by my sword collection, as well as knives, combat canes, and many other martial arts weapons, all within reach.
by Zack on November 28th, 2007
A good old fashion Chuck Norris roundhouse.
by peterpam on November 28th, 2007
Sunday mornings sermon, that should send him away pronto or he might fall asleepa nd then the police can have him!
by LeeLee Chickybabe Avenger SLAB on December 6th, 2007
I'd have to use my keyboard... I don't think my coaster or my pen would do any damage.
by Keanu on December 6th, 2007
My keyboard, and mind you its not a modern feather weight Keyboard, its an ancient heavy weight one.
by Anonymous on November 28th, 2007
One hell of a right hook for starters .
by alien on June 15th, 2008
my fists.
im manly.
by Mr n Mrs M... on March 22nd, 2008
A huge, drawn out, lawsuit...
by Rude Bear Ready for Winter on December 6th, 2007
My Rapier Wit.
by Vampyre Bat on December 6th, 2007
My 350 pound electric wheelchair.
by Talimze on December 6th, 2007
If the burglar were behind me, I don't think he'd be the one getting hit.
by LOLA says... on March 6th, 2008
I just learned this yesterday!
Elbow strikes are best. Although few people use them in self defense because they don't know how to effectively, they generate a lot of power and impact. Aim to strike in the cheekbone, jawbone or nose area; avoiding the mouth since teeth can injure youre elbow.
by ...... on November 28th, 2007
well i was hanging a picture just a while ago and have a hammer right here sitting about a foot away from me so a hammer.
by ELMO on April 15th, 2008
Hmmm...my Laptop. The Chair i'm sitting on. The Suitcase on the floor. The Vase with Roses on it.
by davoomac on February 29th, 2008
I'd empty a packet of Emergen-C in his eyes.
by HungryGuy on February 17th, 2008
A heavy antique brass lamp on the top shelf of my computer desk...crack his skull open and electrocute him at the same time :-)
by VIOLENT DAVE IS A VIKING PIMP on January 28th, 2008
My seething hatered! And a rolled up porn mag!!
by Sketchy Mess Jeoffory on December 6th, 2007
My knuckle sandwich! Put 'em up!
by Popestick on December 6th, 2007
I would use the only two things next to me..my empty glass bottle of starbucks mohca or my huge honk'n calculator...oh, I guess I could stab my heel in his/her eye?!! Haa
by ThatGuyTed on October 2nd, 2009
A 6'7" long 350 pound mass of pent up agression who just found out he's gettin' laid off.
Oh, and he's seen this wrestling move on TV he wants to try out on someone.
by CaptainHarley adores his life penguin on June 15th, 2008
That depends upon how he is standing. The neck is a vulnerable spot, what with all the arteries and nerves, so an open hand with thumb extended would work well. The center of the torso has all sorts of vulnerable nerve ganglia and organs that a flat hand with fingers curled to extend first and second knuckles could damage. The lower torso, with its sexual organs makes an inviting target for an upthrust with the heel of the hand. If he's off balance, a sweep with the lower legs should topple him. There's more than one way to skin a burglar! : D
by spiff on February 29th, 2008
I guess I would have to pick an eye out. All I have in my hand is my pen.
by labeeb xaman on February 17th, 2008
either the back of my head to his head, or (since I'm sittin on floor) I'd lie down b/w his legs and knee him in groin from lyin position. Or I'd spray his eyes. I always have this room freshner since I have er naughty cats :)
by Jewel on February 17th, 2008
The teeth of my dog who is laying right next to me.
by soren on December 6th, 2007
my fists of fury
or my coffee mug
by Snowman on November 28th, 2007
Either elbow, either one of my feet. I also could turn around and strike him with either hand or throw a knee strike, but that might require too much effort... LOL!
by gammyleglady on November 7th, 2008
My laptop, why worry about breaking it, they'd be stealing if not anyway! :0)
by BethRiot on October 22nd, 2008
My lamp!
by advracer on October 14th, 2008
a lawsuit
by Blondiee81 on October 13th, 2008
The knife, that is on the plate, that I just ate my dinner off of... haha!
by bri-ann on June 15th, 2008
a dr.pepper can or a laptop
by Jecks on April 1st, 2008
my coffee cup
by Sasuke Uchiha on March 6th, 2008
i would back-flip off my chair and smack him in the face, then i would run up the wall and run across the ceiling and land on him and hope he pushes me into a wall. then i would use the force of his push to fire me back at him, deflect any attack with 1 foot and attack with the other. then i would carry on going and run up a wall and fire myself down to him and i would go for the neck.
by sm00z on January 21st, 2008
I would throw my hot cup of coffee in his face and kick him in his family jewels and run like hell to call the cops.
by MRSHINYSHOES on July 21st, 2009
My shoe. It has a very hard heel and a good weight to it. Lol.
by iPodaholic on October 17th, 2008
a revolter in my desk drawer. or the one under my chair, or the crowbar hanging from the wall. and this candle, mmm hot wax
by Worzel on September 11th, 2008
I wouldn't have to hit him if he was behind me because he would be embedded in a wall :o)
by C-Bunny Ninja BOC Princess on September 11th, 2008
My computer monitor. It's huge cuz it's from like 2001.
by bigdada on September 11th, 2008
Probably my best shot then I'd fire away.:)
by Nasiswand on September 11th, 2008
There's a sword on the wall in front of me. It wouldn't cut warm butter but I could swing it like a bat.
by shammers still slogging along on June 15th, 2008
The scissors on my desk . . . stab right in any vulnerable spot I can reach.
Do you need an export license for stun guns in the United States?
by Answerbag Staff on August 12th, 2010
| 1 person likes this
Can a minor wear a bulletproof vest?
by Answerbag Staff on July 21st, 2010
| 1 person likes this
Is pepper spray legal in New York City?
by Answerbag Staff on July 22nd, 2010
| 1 person likes this
During a fight, is it possible for a man to just stop? Or does adrenaline generally make him go too far?
by leely on January 1st, 2012
| 1 person likes this
If a burglar was climbing in through your bedroom window, would you punch him in the face and let him fall to the ground?
by Kenz the Frenz on December 26th, 2011
| 1 person likes this
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Comments
lol... *chuckles*
by Mimi..smiling...there is no Option Two.. on November 28th, 2007
Heh, the perfect weapon. And it's already lined up.
by Shavale is very happy on June 15th, 2008
lol i would sure feel bad for the burgler! lol jk
by starsjs1 on September 13th, 2008
my t-shirt would be the ideal clothing - 24 hour farty people pffff ;-}
by Mimi..smiling...there is no Option Two.. on September 14th, 2008
We all learn to work with what we have!! 4+
by Over and Out on December 1st, 2008
I have suffered enough in this life;and no one wants to attempt to take advantage of me. I am in good shape and full of dirty tricks. when someone tries to rip me off.
Last Holiday season some jerk tried to sneak up behind me in the mall. I looked in his face and smiled. He walked away. I am not anyone's fool.
I am always nice unless provoked. I win because I never stop until I destroy people that attempt to hurt my Family. I hate to fight but if given no choice I am near insane. Not an easy victim.
I trust no one and will not let anyone in my house unless I know them.
by philosopher on August 20th, 2009
oooo... cold.
Best get to know you then - starting with your name! lol ;þ
by Mimi..smiling...there is no Option Two.. on August 27th, 2009
Actually, that was what I just thought of!
by JohnnyH73 on April 30th, 2011