by 
biteme
ANSWERS: 10
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um.. this is very hard becuz im 13 and i would hate to have another man in my mothers life so i have to say this. if they like you then they would lissen to you or if there like 13 or 14 u gotta take em places and make them look up to you and maybe they will think what u do is right and lissen to you take them paintballing or deer hunting MANLY stuff
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I am a new step-mother and my husband's teenagers live with us. They listen to me better than they do to their father. I believe the reason is because I ask their opinions and listen to them. Also, when I ask them to do something, I ASK, I don't TELL them to do it. At the beginning I asked for a family meeting and told them how hard this was going to be for all of us and we talked about what our pet peeves were, what we expected from each other, and what we hoped for in the long run. We also laid down family ground rules such as, no yelling at anyone. If you have something to say, then say it nicely and explain your position and listen to opposing opinion, and we compromise when applicable. It works for us and I hope it will work for you. Give them some time and lots of respect and it will pay off.
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Now here is one where I can help. My mom has this boyfreind who I hate! Before he came along my mom was relaxed about the rules. Not all of them just a few. Like if we are at freinds house and need to be home by 5, and we call to stay for a few extra minutes she would be fine with it. Since her boyfreind has come into our lives, He controls everything we do even though he is not our dad. I would suggest talking to your husband about what he allows with his kids and take the back seat with them for a while. Still do stuff with them but see how he punishes them and pick it up. They will like you for that. Also, teens are hard to get along with (i am 16 my self). I hope this helps you.
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You should make them feel like then can trust u try taking them out once and a while to places that would be fun like paintballing go karting places like that but make sure that they no they cant always get u to take them some where.
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Tell them to listen to you, smart one.
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What i would advise is not to be pushed around hold your ground on what you say and will do but don't be the phsyco bitch they dread, if all else doesn't make senes sit down and watch the movie Stepmom. I find in perspective that the movie could help open some closed minded people. I've learned movies and music do make the world go on and they have POWERFULL impacts on emotions and can change situations soo have a movie night, grab a pizza and have a girls night in. Doing things together will help them realize that you're here to stay and that you're not out to hurt them and have a hand in your spouses' pocket, but to be a friend and someone they can talk to.
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Just tell them how it is going to be and they will have to listen. It might be easier if you try to bond with them by helping them with things and stuff like that.
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You don't have to have that much to do with them. I would certainly not marry their dad until they are grown and gone. At least they aren't little.
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Ive been trying it for 7 years now and the youngest still wont listen. Ive given up. In return I dont listen when she asks me something.
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No, in the beginning you need not take any varied teenagers
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