Why do I have the tendency to hurt the people I love most and actually find it amusing to do it?? Is there something psychologically wrong with me? Why do I get pleasure out of it?

Yes there's something mentally wrong with you. To be so sadistic against those that care about you. MY OPINION is that it stems from the fact that you're so miserable in your own life that you don't want to see anyone else happy. You get pleasure in knowing their as bad as you or worse. You're going to end up pushing everyone away. Your going to be completely alone. Then you'll know what true misery is.

Get a shrink.

It's not normal to be amused by hurting people. Especially when it's on purpose. I'm not a doctor, so I can't tell you why you get pleasure out of it. Perhaps you should go see a doctor.

You need to seek treatment. you can be helped with this problem and even cured if you seriously work your program. the first step is that you are aware of it. that is a good thing, good luck.

You're a sadist.

Perhaps you are a psychopath...

I guess I do it out of anger. Why? I dont know. For example, my ex.. I used to love him a whole lot and yet would love to make him feel worthless and small. The more he would suffer, the better I would feel. The thing is that I dont have a bad life nor am I miserable. I dont understand.

You mean hurt emotionally? Maybe its because you can reassure yourself that if you can hurt them emotionally they must actually care about you.

maybe you push people away because they further away people are from you, the less chance they have of hurting you.

the reason you like doing it could be two fold - you find it amusing because fining it funny is better (for you) then feeling bad about it. orrr because you actually managed to achieve what you set out to do, you are happy becuase you actually managed to push these people away.