My wife is unable to have anal sex, she wants to but it's painful. Any ideas?

i have tried it couple of times...yes it is indeed painful...but i think if you keep doing it, the entry point will be quiet felxiable...i hope you dont have a big head in on ur shaft....try using as much oil as possible.....push in slow......

It takes patience, practice and time.

You don't start by driiving a penis or dildo in to the anus.

Start with a well-lubricated baby finger. Work it around.

Then a well-lubricated index finger. Then two fingers.

Then try a penis or dildo.

It might not happen the first few times you do it. But at least you're doing your best to satisfy each other.

You never make love TO that person. You make love WITH that person. For the sake of the younger folks who read these answers, I won't get very graphic. I'm sure you can use your imagination.

I AM A VERY fortunate man. I had the wonderful experience of seeing my parents, both sets of grandparents and all my aunts and uncles behave as though they were constantly on their honeymoons with their spouses.
They would hold hands, cuddle, hug, kiss, whisper things to each other, say, "I love you, _____!" and carry-on like many young people, who are in love, do in public.
They would smile at each other and tell each other
how beautiful, wonderful and thoughtful she was and
how thoughtful, wonderful and handsome he was!
WOW! What a great set of romance role models!

No, I never watched as they were making love in the most intimate way, but I DID see and learn from their examples and inter-actions with their spouses! As far as I know, no one ever cheated on the other.

That being said, one day my mother's father got in the car with me. I was driving him to the track. He "LOVED those ponies"! He was well-aware of the relationship I had with the lady I was dating and who would one day be my bride.

He said words similar to these:
I know your father told you what to do, but did he ever tell you how to do it?
I answered, "No".

He went on to say, "I'm going to tell you some things I don't think you'll learn from any one else. When you have sex, make love or whatever you want to call it, you don't behave like most other men. Most men are just interested in one thing and one thing only - satisfying their own selfish selves.

That's NOT the way to do it. You have to make absolutely certain she is satisfied. No matter how long it takes or what you have to do, you have to do whatever it takes to make sure she does what she likes to do best. You HAVE TO satisfy her first.

Your brain is the most important sex organ. Your brain controls what happens downstairs. When you aren't sure about what to do or how to do it, ask her what she wants you to do. She'll tell you or she'll show you. When you're making love, you think of other things - not what's going on at that particular moment with that particular lady. When you think about what you're actually doing, I guarantee you'll never satisfy the lady in your life.

He went on to explain about holding hands, hugging, kissing, caressing and taking things one step at a time. He described a lot of things I heard of but wasn't sure about.

During that ride, one of the last things he said was:
When you are absolutely sure she is satisfied, then you can do what you know is best for you - but not one minute before.

That's what I was told.

Thank you, Gran'pop. I love you. I miss you!

Some afterthoughts: You could also buy a book, on-line, called "Kama Sutra."

You could also go on-line and make the investment in some "adult sex toys" to stimulate and arouse. There are LOTS of sites.

Thanks for asking your Q! I enjoyed answering it!

VTY,
Ron Berue
Yes, that is my real last name!

Sources: My wonderful family!

"THE University of Hard Knocks"
also known as ("a/k/a") "life's valuable lessons"

Use lube! Lots of it!

I've tried anal, but I personally don't like it. It was really painful for me, so it's probably something I wouldn't want to try again. When we did try it, I had him start with a finger, then maybe moving to two fingers. After the muscles are a bit relaxed, I had him enter me with his penis. We made sure he was really lubricated well. No sudden movements, just let it slide in. I hope she enjoys it more than I did.

Don't do it.
Just try it out with a dildo on yourself (or with a gay , you being the bottom.)
You'll know why she finds it painful.

you need more persisitence and more push, you can't just give up it can be pleasureable after you guys have practiced and you have to be greedy and forceful thats when girls like it and talk hell of dirty, she'll be fine then.

more and more lube

Like the other posters here said, practice with fingers, toys, and use tons of lube. However I also should say that doing it all at once isn't the best way. For example, you're in bed, you bring up anal, you start with a finger, then another, maybe another, do that for a little while, then slide in with your penis. Honestly, I think for a woman to be comfortable with anal sex and have it not be painful, you need 'prolonged' practice. Like having her use a butt plug for a few weeks even. Leaving it in there for extended periods to help her stretch. Then when she's more used to it, if you have sex planned that night, have her wear the plug for an hour or more before you have sex so she's more loose. It depends on the girl, that may make her more sore or sensitive but the key is to start small and slow and eventually work up. Take it from me, someone who once felt pain with one finger, who now can take my guy completely up there. Practice makes perfect :)