My boyfriend would rather masturbate to porn everyday than to have sex with me. He says its because it hurts his back and he is to tired. What should I do?

You don't really need to ask this question. You know he's a waste of time and effort and you need to trade him in for a fully working model.

make him a home video of
YOU so he can masturbate to it.

oral. its great and wont break your back.

xoxo

Not too much you can do. But about 90% of people masturbate...the other 10% lie about it.

Masturbating is fine, but I never heard of any man that would rather do that than sex. He's got some pretty lame excuses for not having sex with you. If it were me, I'd lose him unless he's handicapped or something.

Find another boyfriend.

my boyfriend is the same, we used to have sex all the time at 1st, but now its once a week if im lucky, he always says hes too tired or he cant be bothered, but he waits untill im asleep so he can wank to porn. It really annoys me and makes me feel so ugly and unwanted that he prefers other women, he obviously dont want me. I know its not all about sex, but what is the point if your boyfriend just doesnt want you anymore? There is nothing you can do to make them want you, and its driving me mad because i love him to bits but its just not going to work. I dont know why, but i never thought my boyfriend would ever prefer porn to me.. I just thought it was a teenage phase until they got the real thing, but not prefer it! I think its time for me to get a new man or just get myself a toy!! Lol :)

It is sad to say, but he is just not that into you anymore. Dump his cowardice butt. He is too much of a coward to break-up with you. SO do yourself a favor, and find someone that craves you. I know it hurts to hear, but if a girl he WAS attracted to walked through the door, he would work through the "back pain" to have sex with her.

AP

I have the same problem except my man excuse is that he is board and there I am all alone in the bedroom. Or he need a different feeling so he masturbates. Hang in there! I'm feel so sorry for you. I understand. It makes me feel unwanted and unattractive. I'm sure you feel the same. I'm sorry. Hope things get better for both of us.

Sounds like it is time to find a new boyfriend. I can't think of a time that I have chosen porn over the real thing.

jerk him off with baby oil or lotion

You can be on toP! Nothing wrong with being on top. Then he can just lay on his lazy butt and just be happy.

Personally I'd rather masturbate every day AND have sex with my wife, but I have a very high sex drive for my age. I have health issues that can make some positions very difficult at times, and sometimes I'm just too tired for full-on rabid gorilla rage furniture destroying wallpaper peeling chandelier swinging omgwtflol sex, so I go down on my wife. She enjoys it, it's relaxing and stimulating at the same time, and I love to please her. Also it usually turns me on enough to get past the fatigue, pain, and discomfort. Even if I'm still too tired or in too much pain I'm still satisfied if I know she's content. I don't HAVE to have an orgasm every time we have sex to be happy, but if she doesn't have at least one I know I haven't done my job.

Your boyfriend sucks, or should I say sucked. I'm really hoping that by now he's out of the picture.

remind him that women go thru the ultimate purge and we still function, so if he wants to keep you he should stop being such a (I hate to use the word pussy cause we're so much tougher than the boys) wimp. That will either show you how worthless he is or goad him into performance.

If he says he;s too tired suggest you go on top and do all the work, if he still doesn't want to, well he has issues.

find a new boyfriend

If he's too tired, it's probably because he's masturbating every day. There are a number of positions that will aleviate any stress he feels in his back.

The issue is not of energy or exertion. Your boyfriend seems to have an issue with intimacy and it needs to be explored if you are each going to be fulfilled in the relationship. Sit down and talk with him. Find some mutually satisfying positions and practices in bed. More importantly, learn to be intimate together without bringing sex into it at all.

It's funny, move on girl, get yourself another man! Some people are just plain dumb! It's not that the man or your boyfriend doesn't want to have sex, the problem is that you are too boring, nagging, dirty, something that is making him repulsed by you. So, don't just say, why don't you want to have sex with me, really ask him if he is turned on by you. Chances are that he is, but there's something that is bugging him. You see, men are very visual, maybe he likes lingerie but you never wear it for him, maybe he wants to see you dance before the deal, and you never dance for him, maybe you just tell him, let's go honey before American Idol starts, you ever do that? So, yeah, there's something wrong, but it might not be with him, the problem might be with you, talk to each other.

its sad that so many women are getting hurt just becouse of this....

tell him about that its bothering you.
how seriously this is bothering you.

communicate.

I have the same problem. My boyfriend of four years has recently been on the internet all night long while I am asleep and watches porn and gets on dating sites to chat with women. Every morning when I log into my computer I find new crap in my mail folder and this morning I found a wad of babywipes on my kitchen floor with a womans email address ripped up inside. I am devestated and he gets angry with me when I ask him why. He waits till I go to sleep at night then he is online all night till 6 or 7am. I don't know what to do myself. Mine doesn't have a back issue or anything like that and he has no job. While I am at work he is online as well. He also does checks on me to see what I have been doing online. He is crazy jelous and has no reason to be. He is the one being a pig!! What should I do???

I have the same problem he does it almost everyday in the bathtub looking at porn and we have sex maybe once a week ! He says hes a dude and they do that! But im more than willing to have sex. Ive sent him pics of me and certain parts of my body to do that to, but he still uses the porn Im not bad looking and i get told all the time that Im sexy. But this has really been a blow to my self asteem!! He says he loves having sex with me and that he thinks im sexy. Why then do we not have more sex and why does he masturbate everyday instead of having sex with me????

Kick his ass to the curb and find someone new. Not even worth the waisted effort. You should never have to try to get your man to have sex with you. My boyfriends poking me in the butt first thing in the morning and several times throughout the day.

If this is a big issue for you then there's only one thing to do - move on. But if you want to try to work on this, you could try watching with him and seeing where things lead. Porn is a powerful addiction for many.

This is a VERY common behaviour in men. The fact is - YOU are either too nagging or too darn boring.

So, instead of whining about the fact that HE masturbates to porn, you can :

1) Make your OWN life a little more exciting and interesting. Watch porn with him!

2) He seems the exploring kinds, work it out with him. I understand women get the bad deal, but life isn't fair - deal with it.

3) Break up - which is the easiest way of running away from your own troubles.

4) Understand that he is bored out of his mind, no doubt. He should be partying with you instead of a video box. But you'd probably have the same effect on OTHER men that you might date. ;)

Always remember - the person who ACTUALLY HAS the problem NEEDS THERAPY. Hence, YOU need therapy - not him.

He is content with making himself happy no matter what the cost (I'd say he's intelligent. I wouldn't term him selfish since we don't belong to orphanages), I suggest you should too.

My ex was that way. I think people like that have a problem with intimacy and giving. It's a real effort for them. I don't think he will change and may withdraw even more as time goes by like mine did. Maybe you should consider if that's what you want your life to be like.

men masturbate instead of fuck because

1. Their performance is not judged.
2. its a lot less effort - no issue of pleasing your partner..
3. They can get the job done, before their dick is even hard... for some guys... especially ones over 40.. hardness might only last for 2 minutes anyway - not enough to please their partner.
4. its a lot less effort - fucking is hard work, many men will be worn out prior to pleasing their partner or themselves.
5. once you've been wanking for a while, a vagina is often just not tight enough to stimulate a man to orgasm. Or perhaps even not enough to keep him hard. Its a viscous cycle.

Very very rarely is it because their partner is not attractive enough. lets face it. if you've got a vagina, and breasts however imperfect, and a pulse...thats usually enough attraction for most men.

I'd be coming home with a dildo, and sitting on the couch masturbating with it.

If your main complains of a sore back, offer to masturbate him as long as he is prepared to masturbate you.

while hes watchn porn just randomly get on him and make out with him and start ridin him. show him why hes with you and not porn stars :)

Most people are missing the point here. Your boyfriend jerking off it fine, that is not in debate, the issue here is that he prefers jacking off to porn to fucking you --

To begin with, I fuck my wife at least once a day and I still jerk off. That is normal and jacking off it a nice feeling in addition to other sexual activities. I also love porn, and none of that is a problem.

My quick suggestion is to help him -- perhaps to tell him to watch porn while you jerk him off. That is a nice step in the right direction with the two of you retaining contact but him watching porn at the same time. That can lead to a blowjob, and that can lead to you playing with yourself, and after he sees your pussy he will probably want it also.

Finally, make this a slow process, dont expect results in a day. You may need to jack him off while he watches porn for a month before he looses the excitement of the new act and wants more (i.e. you!). Just take it slow -- he may be telling the truth and the important thing is to retain physical contact with you man.

I'm 23 and separated with my wife after only a year and this was one of our problems. I was like your boyfriend, except I knew it was wrong and didn't offer any excuses. I couldn't stop masturbating, even after we addressed the problem. But looking back, the solution to the problem is to stay so busy that I don't have time to be horny until she comes home.

Dump him and find someone else, what an ass.

well my first instinct is something else is wrong- like with your relationship. dont mean it to sound harsh.. is everything else ok with your relationship? sex is a BIG thing... but, anyway... supposing i am wrong, and hopefully i am-

then...

get him excited, and get on top .... or do it standing up so his back doesnt hurt