Well the keyword "lovingly" answers it for me. No.

Absolutely not. A pet peeve of mine as our well; child safety advocates have successfully nurtured an environment where parents can no longer effectively discipline their children. All children don't "need" spanking; however many children have not reached the mind-set where "reasoning" is a tool that can be applied. In most cases, they don't have the life experience to understand WHY they must behave in a certain manner. They understand a bit of pain, though. Now we have a generation of kids who don't understand there are consequences for their actions, who'll readily call police on their parents for smacking that butt and who are destined for a rude awakening once they get on their own... ...that is, unless some law maker makes it mandatory parents shelter children until they're old enough to collect social security or something.

No

a swat on the butt never killed anyone, and instilled the basis of punishment for wrong actions and discipline.

I think that "lovingly spanking" is an oxymoron in all circumstances outside of consensual sex acts between two adults. Discipline does not equate to physical hitting, and far better methods exist. I think that striking another person in any scenario outside of their express permission, or perhaps medical emergency (shock) is abusive.

Not at all. Any parent who does not do so when it is needed is the lacking parent.

How can you lovingly spank a child?? You spank a child out of anger, frustration or because that was how you were raised. But I don't think love is foremost in your mind when you raise your hand to strike. You know the saying this will hurt me more than it hurts you? Well just walk away before you do something you will regret without a doubt.

No! My daughter went through a phase where no other punishment worked with her - the only thing that helped keep her in line was a spanking. Then she moved to a new phase and we found a new punishment to discipline her. Some children don't respond well to restriction, time out, and other methods. The thing parents have to watch for is whether or not their child is responsive to whatever discipline is being used.

i dont know, but how can you discipline your child, if you raise your voice your being verbally abusive, if you smack physically, grounding them is classed as forced imprisonment, and confiscating something is classed as taking away their righs to said object,

No, not at all. I think the world has gotten out of hand with all this parental abuse junk. Sometimes it is the only thing that works.

I was "spanked" as a child. It didn't make me behave, it made me feel rage. The kind of anger a child should never feel. It didn't make me a better person, it only made me doubt my self-worth. To answer the question, YES, I do.

not greatly but its a form of abuse and i would never do it to my children

I was spanked as a child when needed it I realize it was necessary at the time. I have no emotional scars from proper discipline.I think that it is the right of parents to lightly spank the kids for most parents don't want to harm their children but have run out of ideas on raising them properly.The fact that the law steps in is unwise for there is a difference between spanking and abuse.

if the child ask you to stop and they don't then it is

No it's not abusive. People these days are taking the word "spanking" out of context. Everyone is doing "time out". I wish we had time out when I was growing up. I would have love it because its no big deal.

no that soud a bit peodophile-ish when u said loveingly

No. Nice tap on the butt is ok. People these days are afraid to play with their kids for fear that someone might think they are either a pervert or abusive. Whatever feels right to you. F$%# everyone else.

No.

No, I lovingly, beat the crap out of mine all the time, LOL!

Spanking, no, beating yes. Some kids don't respond to any other punishment. Some kids don't respond to spanking. If taking away the TV upsets the kid the most, don't spank take away the TV. Spanking shouln't be the default form of punishment, but if it works, do it. My parents spanked me, and all they had to do was threaten me with one and I straightened up, after I had a few.

no, I believe it helps.

Not in any way. If the child responds to a spanking and if it isn't done in anger, it's a good tool for disciplining. But not eh only one. It's of no use all by itself.

I firmly believe in "corporal punishment" My son knew he would get spanked and I think it deterred him from bad behavior. My neice's 3 kids know that all she is going to talk is sit them down and talk to them and therefore they are terrors. I have predicted her youngest will be stealing cars when he's 12. Kids aren't dumb.

There is a difference between spanking/disiplining your children and abusing them. Unfortunately though some don't know that.

I would never hit my children if I ever had any someday, and I don't think anyone should. I mean, when I was a child I was only spanked a handful of times, and it still bothers me, and I'm 21 year old... It's not necessary to spank children to discipline. I think all this "Nothing else would work with my kids" is a load of BS. You just didn't try hard enough then, if the ONLY way you could get them to behave was spank them.

spanking is abusive. if you are going to follow the bible, you should use a stick, called a rod. Of course people see that as really being abusive, so they spank kid's bottoms instead. My parent's didnt spank me, and I in turn didnt spank my kids. We talked about what was right and wrong. Kids loss their opportunity to do fun stuff. There were problems but the problems got solved. I had a neighbor friend, a boy, whose father hit him with a leather shaving strap. and the mom would use something from the kitchen like a spatula or an egg flipper. They were violent people. They had a dog that they kept in a small fenced in area at the end of the garage. It would bark and snarl at anyone who came near. It was vicious. The people would let the dog run loose at night, we were all scared to go out at night. But one night i was out and the dog was out and it turned out that the dog was friendly when it was out of its cage. So we were friends and I could pet it when it was in its enclosure much to everyone's amazement.

Nah. Not as long as it's truly lovingly and slight and there is no anger involved or anything. I prefer to lustily spank women though.

I do not believe spanking is abusive. When I was a kid, we, as well as our friends, got spanked with a peach tree switch, hairbrush, paddle, belt, or whatever was available at the moment we did something so horrible as to need to be spanked. Not doing as we were told was the biggest transgression. I NEVER felt abused from spankings . . . other things yes, but not spankings.

There is a fundementally difference between spanking and beating. The difference is in the attitude and emotional state of the parent at the time. If for example you tell your child don't do this and they do it any way, then you take them aside and have a talk about actions and consequences and then administer a few firm swats. That is not abuse. That is disipline. If however you tell the child don't do this and they do it and you tell them again and this cycle repeats until you are so frustrated you yell at them and grab them and smack'em one. That is abuse. All you are teaching them is that they can get away with things and push your buttons.

No. I have a friend that works with the social services(D.S.S) she said "spanking is not abuse although we do not support it and if the parent/gardian get angry but does not notice that a smanking can turn into a hit which could make a hand make on the childs body and thats when we come in"

No children need to learn right from wrong.

How do you "lovingly" spank your children? Spanking is a punishment...

The combination of words "lovingly spanking" is the most disturbing contradiction in terms I have ever heard. No parent EVER lovingly spanks their child because it is impossible. Spanking is a reaction sparked by anger, not love. Spanking of children is abusive.

No. But you should never spank when you are angry. I believe, talk to the child, tell them you love them tell them why they are getting a spanking and then spank them, Only on the rear and never hard enough to leave marks, then talk to them again and tell them again that you love them. I say look at this world today. Allot more people are saying dont spank your child its abuse. And look at how all of these non spanked kids are turning out. Rude tennagers and even worse adults. back 50 years ago there is no way a child would get away with yelling at their parents, talking back, calling their parents names and so on.

I'll agree with that one person who said that "lovingly spanking" is a contradiction in terms. That said, I do not believe spanking is abusive. When I was little I was spanked and I never considered it to be abuse, and even looking back at the age of 45 I still don't. Lack of discipline, this kind included, is a part of what's wrong with society now. The generations after mine have not been shown discipline and now they show little or no respect for themselves, others, rules or authority.

no...

No, I do not think so. I always believe if we spare the rod we will spoil the child.

So long as we have it straight... This is okay - "lovingly spanking" as a punishment, because you love them and you don't want them to grow up to be misfits This is not okay - "lovingly spanking" them because you are in love with them and you like the way their butt feels This is also not okay - "lovingly spanking" them because you love to cause pain This one is...debatable - "lovingly spanking", like not even a real spank, just a tap as a gesture of love. Refer to the second example, if it does not apply, and it's more like a 'sports tap', then I see no problem

..lovingly spanking?? .. not a real concept is it really ..

No!

I don't think so.....

No the child needs loving discipline to teach them to not burn their finger and a pop on the hand is a way of teaching them --- + up --- Where are you High we miss you

simply put i discipline my children now or the police and judical system will discipline them later. I believe in spankings when appropriate. i dare someone to say something to me about disciplining the children that i had.

The phrase 'lovingly spanking' really gives me a nasty feeling. Sounds somehow - perverted.

yes, it's okay, George spanks me all the time. it very good with a rabbit.

no i dont because it makes some kids more angry and that meens they misbehave more so u r spaning them so you can spank them again for your own likeing how meen is that

very good question Highlander (pity about some of the people who comment, they cant even spell never mind leave educated responses) i was given a smack as a child many times when i was naughty and it was deserved. i remember always getting a hug from my mum afterwards and we would chat briefly about my behaviour and why i deserved a smack. it was never done out of anger or hate and i always new i was loved and cared for and my parents just wanted what was best for me. i can say they did a sterling job raising all the kids (4 of us) and we have all turned out as very successful adults because of the guidance of our parents. i thank my parents for how we were raised. i think a few more people need to take a page out of the old school book and practice some basic dicipline, the world is falling apart because the youth are up to no good because the parents are so weak. a good smack never killed anyone if it was deserved and done out of love and guidance. i dont have kids yet but i will smack my kids when it is deserved and i will always love them unconditionally.

Well in this country it is illegal. I follow laws here and do not spank. One can see it from both perspectives. Here they believe fear is not a good way to raise kids. On the other hand you do feel like it sometimes could be nesessary. I would not judge a parent that spanks, causing no harm to their kids, they are just trying to raise them and thank God they are! But I just don't do it myself, I think them being in their room and thinking over things works very well for me, also removing privileges, and grounding works fine.

When I was a young child I was spanked & to be honest, it left me afraid of my mother. Whenever I thought I had done something wrong I ran up the stairs holding my bottom saying to her..."I promise I'll be good!". This WAS NOT 'lovingly spanking' at all. Even though she never hit me so hard to leave a mark, I thought my mother hated me. If I ever have kids I will never spank them. In my opinion, it IS abuse without a doubt & I would never want to put them through it.

Hitting children, even with the best of intentions, merely teaches them that it's OK to hit, and that they don't want to get caught. It does not "teach" correct behavior, but instead enforces fear and violence.

Yes

Not at all - I should think that everyone on this sit was spanked when we were children at some point. Theres a massive difference between beating your child and a gentle slap on the hand. I have 2 young children (4 & 5), who will only be spanked if they lie to either myself or my wife.

No... but there is a point that they get to old to spank... I'd say that's about middle school age. By then they will respond better to another form of punishment.

no its not abusive. end of story. kids need disipline and there are too many that don't have it today. I fear what the world will turn into when those kids grow up.

If i had one yes.

"loving spanking" is best kept between consenting adults.

No, don't spank your child when they need it. We will see them later in life at some school somewhere, where they have shot and killed other students. Yeah, that "Time Out" crap worked great for you, didn't it!

You know honestly my parents never spanked us past age 7 or so, and we turned out all right. Always behaved well in school good grades etc. We went to church and religious ed quite regularly though so we learned respect and compassion.

Yes. I dont think these is such a thing as 'lovingly spanking' as the child does not think this is what a loving parent would do and thus becomes afraid of their parent and does not confide in them when they have problems for fear of similar treatment or just the recollection of it in their memories. So yes it is abusive. If you hit someone in the street for being bold then they could sue you for harassment, so why is it acceptable to hit children?

You make it sound so dirty... But no, spanking is not abusive. It can be, but most parents know the difference between using spankings to vent and using them to teach.

Yes and no. I don't think love is really in your mind when you spank a child either. However, sometimes the kids don't understand where the boundaries are and a quick and immediate response lets them know beyond a "NO" that it's not okay. I would stop at the age of seven.

If you're spanking a child, but because you love them then i don't think it's wrong.

Yes.

Corporal punishment has been standard for all of human history. It is nice to know that we have become so truly enlightened in this most recent score of years - and what could prove the wisdom of this culmination of paradise-on-Earth than the obvious perfection of the newer generations? . ~eyeroll~

All spanking is is a nice way of saying striking. Yes, it is an abusive act.

No. Dependson how you spank them, if you give em a chance...and put em in their room, they dont wanna go...so you stick em in the corner, and then they give you attitude...and then theres no other way of saying..."Hey, you need to listen...and cut the attitude" yeah...spanking is just fine. My daughter when she hit 3 started getting crazy. Just "talking" didnt work anymore...so we started spanking. The kid turned a 360 in no time... She throws a fit, we talk...she dont wanna do it, we spank...and then talk again when she figures out "a fit doesnt get you anything"... Depends if you spank cuz YOUR ANGRY...or if you spank, cuz its what the kid needs. ....you cant always pitty patter around the edges with your kids...yeah some kids learn from "talking" and other dicipline, and the ones who dont...need something more. I was spanked, my family was spanked...my husband was spanked, and were all just fine. LoL. Im glad I was spanked. There would be less problems in the world today if parents knew how to properly dicipline their kids, and if they did...they wouldnt be going crazy!! ...but its all up to the parent. Spanking gets a bad name, when bad parents spank...cuz it gets outta control. My daughter willingly accepts spankins, Cuz she already knows I told her...10 spankins if you do this, so she takes em....cuz she knows she WILLINGLY did something wrong. no...its not abuse. Abuse is when you are in fear of a parent, of them just getting angry and hitting you. Spanking causes fear in a child...but a fear of... "WOAH, i better not do this...geez if I do, ill get spanked........should I do it?"..."naw, I dont wanna get spanked"...LOL.

absolutely not........spanking your child is a way of teaching him......its tough and yes sometimes you will cry afterwards.....but it shows that you love him/her and you want the best for them.....and if it means spanking them every time they do wrong then go ahead....they have to learn the hard way so mite as well start at home

no

no. They need to be corrected and they will appreciate it in the end.

no

nop but better not ,someone may get it wrong

After 18 it is.

No it is not aduse...I am 50 yrs old and thank parents every day for the spankings me and my siblings got...We all grew up just fine, good jobs are own homes, and never been to jail thank god for the spankings we got...The bible do say spare the rod spoil the child...You as a parent has to have the upper hand at all times or your children will grow up raiseing you in stead or even worse pregnant at an early age,in jail or dead...Please do ypur job as a parent and spank when its needed...it will pay off in the end.

i honestly think that spanking children is something that is of value, as long as they did something bad......i got whipped like a mother frakker by my principal when i was a holy terror in grade school.....i wish he had bought me dinner first...hahah......

Well the way my parents brought us up is now called child abuse. However, none of the seven kids have criminal records, so far. All of them graduated and half have a bachelor's degree. I disciplined my kids by removing things that they adore doing. Spank them once or twice, not much, mainly bec there are some kids that will never learn no matter how much you spank them.

i dont think spanking a child is abuse but i can say there is a difference between beating(spanking) a child and BEATING a child

No because God's Word says Spare the rod spoil the Child, just to name 1 verse in the Bible.

HAHAHAAAA lovingly spanking is an oxymoron, hunny bunches of oats.

There is nothing wrong with it.

There is no such thing like " lovingly spanking your kid. " A moron and a bad parent came up with beating children , having the need of beat your children is a sign that you're a bad parent.

lovingly spank sounds kind of sick and sinister.

'You are doing it for their own good'? or 'This is gonna hurt me more than it hurts you? Most people who spank, I believe, seem to think the child is going to learn something from being spanked. There could be something to that. I learned to be more careful about not getting caught next time.

No

yes because deep down you enjoy hurting them its sick but we all have it

Nope, and there is a BIG distinction between spanking a child and beating him or her.

Lol that doesn't sound right saying lovingly spanking a kid

What do you mean by lovingly? Do you mean to spanking only when you rationalize that it is the best option, and that you make the decision purely void of anger? I was ass kicked when I was young. My father would always tell me in hindsight that it was out of love, but when he beat me, all I could see was his rage.

Spanking is wrong going in that direction you have lost the argument Respect is what you want to gain from your children.Spank and you have lost the battle as you cannot communicate verbally or compromise with your children accept with violence it is a losing battle.Teach them to have a conscience and understand the reasons why they are being punished by other means. Children are small versions of you would you like to be beaten or taught the right way to do things.I know what I would choose annmac

Hell no. It's sexy as fuck.

NO, I BELIEVE IN SPANKING FOR THE YOUNG WHEN THEIR WRONG, SO THEY REMEMBER AND GROW UP STRAIGHT AND HONEST. EACH PARENT IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR YOUNG, SO APPROPIATE SPANKING IS NECESSARY, NOT ABUSIVE, BUT NECESSARY.

Of course not!

"Spanking" is a physical assault on someone, by another person, regardless of the age of either the "spanker" or the "spankee." A parent, regardless of how much s/he loves the child, cannot possibly "lovingly" assault a child. Hitting is hitting, and spanking is hitting. All it accomplishes is giving pain and fostering resentment and hatred withi the child, but more seriously, it sends this very wrong message to the child: "Administering pain to someone, is a way to get them to do whatever it is you want them to do." Thus, many guys use pain to get their WIVES to do what they want them to do, or to let them know that they are angry with them, for some imagined "offense." Many guys go beyond any supposed boundaries, and just BEAT their wives or kids, eventually becoming prison inmates. Red Buttons (1919-2006), the famous actor and comedian once said, only half jokingly: "Never strike anyone who will one day choose your nursing home." +5

Most things are degrees. Several years ago there was a women who drove herself and her three children into a river - she survived, they did not. When asked why ; she responded she did it out of kindness - to save them from a hard life. Too darn many variable, too many unknowns - not always right, not always wrong.+5

How do you spank your kids lovingly

Lovingly spanking is not even a punishment.

While I don't think that spanking is always abusive, I have yet to see a parent spank his/her child in a loving manner. Most of the parents that I've observed use spankings as a way to vent their anger against the child. Of course, maybe there are parents who can administer physical punishment in an appropriate manner; I just have yet to see an example of that.

Yes. Physical punishmesnt is a barbaric act IMO. Nothing lovingly about it. Spanking is for concenting adults ONLY. There is a lot better ways to deal with children other than laying a hand on them.

Spanking your child is not abuse. It's quick, sure discipline which is effective. . Example. You tell your kid not to touch the hot stove. He does and burns his hands. You place him in timeout and talk to him about disobeying you. Why won't he put his hand on the hot stove again? Because of your talk, or the pain he experienced?

How pathetic! Of course it's abuse.

kids are angels! how can anyone do this to them?