ANSWERS: 6
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There's nothing really wrong with a rebound relationship... consider it "practice" for the real thing. However -- if you see potential for the real thing, then stay tuned to those moments that you, or your partner, get triggered. Don't delay working those parts out, because the sooner you practice working things out, the sooner you'll know if the relationship has any hope. This means taking pride in your feelings, and not feeling threatened by reactions to your feelings. There is somebody out there that will love you the way you are, and hopefully that you can love the way they are. As soon as you start wishing somebody to be different, or start feeling that pressure to change... watch out. Granted -- everybody can become a better person -- but that should come from "seeing the light" not having the light forced on you.
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If you want to avoid the rebound effect, just be friends with him - tell him that you want to take it slow and start out as friends. Having just got out of a long relationship (even if just recently) you are probably fairly clear about what you do and don't want in a relationship - just make sure that if you do get into a romantic relationship with this potential long-term guy, that you don't find yourself reluctantly admitting that you're making the same mistakes just for the sake of keeping him in your life - you've been given a 're-do' - make the most of it and be more assertive or whatever it was that you would undoubtedly realise you need to improve on for your own self as well as your life and relationships. Congrats on the new guy and I hope it all goes well for you - whether it's as a friendship or something more.
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become friends first
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Just take things very slowly
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By just not making it one.
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Before you get into a relationship with this new guy. Make sure you are 100% over your ex. If your not completely sure that you are over your ex then just be friends with this new guy until you are.
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