Develop a good sense of humor because you are sure to need it often!!

Penny, are you getting married? If so, congratulations. If not well... my generic answer is. Don't stress the small things. Marriage is a big adjustment. Single life is one thing but being married takes teamwork, cooperation and compromise.

Marriage is work... expectations abound, selfishness keeps wanting to take over. There's pain, and heartache, and stupid arguments. Your mate will never be the person you think they should be, and you'll fall short of your own ideals as well. You'll be bored, frustrated, tempted to look elsewhere, and more than once you'll decide it was a mistake. He won't listen, he'll try to solve problems instead of just being caring, and you'll learn all the bad things about him that you didn't realize before. When you can make your peace with all of that, it's an amazing thing to be married.

Hands down,no question...be friends FIRST..because when the difficult times come, and they will, the friendship will tide you over...friends respect one another always...marry a friend and you'll have a wonderful marriage. :)

Before you can truly accept others (such as a spouse) you have to learn to fully accept yourself. Like, love and accept yourself, without juddgment. If you can do that, then you will easily recognize that ae significant issues and what are insignificant ones, and what is worth arguing over and what isn't. If you trust and honor yourself, you will always be true to yourself. Also, you will choose as partners, only those people who truly honor themselves and who, by choosing them, honor you.

Be sure that you can live with those little things that bother you about your partner now. As the years go by, those little things become big issues.

After you have asked yourself, "Do I honestly feel that our love is mutual?" ask, "Do I totally trust this person to be my *partner in life*? Do I know that I will never doubt this person's word, and fidelity?" If all these can, without reserve, be and answered with a "Yes!" Then go for it. It is highly likely that you will be able to survive anything life throws at the two of you. If nothing else, it's worth the risk your heart will be taking. Also, once you are married, never say, "I love you." without showing it in some way. It'll take time to get the hang of it, but with practice, you'll find that it comes as second nature to actually love your spouse in action, and not just in word. Also, remember that you cannot make your spouse do what is right for the relationship. That's for them to commit to. It's out of your hands. Just be what you should be toward them. Couples tend to gage their actions off of each other. If one disrespects the other, the other tends to react by being disrespectful, "How can you be angry with me about something you do me all the time." This type of behavior often destroys a marriage. Do what is right by your spouse. Set the standard, and never try to force them to change. Instead, let them change. Marriage is a HUGE commitment, but it can be very rewarding.