Do u have a funny short joke to share? if yes, PLEASE make me laugh! or a funny sentence would work :)
by 
SoPtAmEr
ANSWERS: 14
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Those who live by the sword... get shot by those who don't.
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A few years ago, when Boudreaux was a college freshman at LSU, being fresh out of the swamp, and a rather healthy young man, he figured he'd try out for the football team. "Can you tackle?" asked the coach the first day of practice. "Watch dis," Boudreaux told him, and proceeded to run smack into a telephone pole, shattering it to splinters. "Wow," said the coach. "I'm impressed. Can you run?" "Mais, sure I can run," said Boudreaux. He was off like a shot, and, in just over nine seconds, he had run a hundred yard dash! "Great!" exclaimed the excited coach. "But can you pass a football?" Boudreaux rolled his eyes, hesitated for a few seconds and replied, "Mais, Coach," he said, "if I can swallow it I can probably pass it."
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http://www.joe-ks.com/ ... click this ... and laugh away ...
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Here's one I know of. A bum asks a man for two dollars. The man says, "If I give you the money, will you just use it to buy booze?" The bum says no. The man asks, "Will you gamble it away?" The bum says no. Then the man asks, "Then will you come home with me so my wife can see what happens to a man who doesn’t drink or gamble?"
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A baby seal walks into a club. ~*~ A string walks into a bar and asks if he can have a beer. The bartender says "Sorry, pal, we don't serve strings." The string says "C'mon, man! I'm a nice guy, I won't cause any trouble!" "Sorry, but we don't serve strings." So the string walks out of the bar, messes up his hair and ties himself all up into a tangle, walks back in, and asks for a beer. The bartender looks him up and down and says "Hey, aren't you that string that came in five minutes ago?" "Nope, I'm a frayed knot." Sorry those suck. ): I KNOW I've heard some great ones, but I can't think of any of them right now. </3
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a dyslexic cat walks into a bar and says "OW!"...."ME."
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The angry wife met her husband at the door. There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his collar. "I assume," she snarled, "that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in here at six o'clock in the morning?" "There is," he replied. "Breakfast."
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A koala is sitting up a gum tree smoking a joint when a little lizard walks past. The little lizard looks up and says "Hey Koala ! what are you doing?" The koala says: "Smoking a joint, come up and have some." So the little lizard climbs up and sits next to the koala and they have a few puffs. After a while the little lizard says his mouth is 'dry' and is going to get a drink from the river. But the little lizard is so stoned that he leans too far over and falls into the river. A crocodile sees this and swims over to the little lizard and helps him to the side, then asks the little lizard: "What's the matter with you?" The little lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting smoking a joint with the koala in the tree, got too stoned and then fell into the river while taking a drink. The crocodile says he has to check this out and walks into the rain forest, finds the tree where the koala is sitting finishing a joint, and he looks up and says "Hey you!" So the koala looks down at him and says:.............. "Fuuuuck dude.......how much water did you drink?!!"
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(did this one before on AB) Joe was always an outcast. He was always made fun of. It was because of his eye, or lack of one. He had one wooden eye because of a hunting accident. Kate was also laughed at constantly. She had an obvious and ugly scar running across the side of her face - one she'd had ever since she was born. One day, the city hall was holding its annual dance. The beautiful couples swept about the floor, flaunting their beauty. Everyone had a date. that is, except for Joe who was drinking in the corner, and Kate who sat quietly by herself. Both wishing they were out on the dancefloor. Joe eventually spotted Kate sitting alone and timidly walked up to her, just as self-concious as ever. He held out his hand and asked "Would you like to dance with me?" Kate: "Oh! Would I?!" Joe: "Then forget it Scarface!" And off he storms. ("would/wood I/eye?")
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Well, it's not that short, but you don't have to read it!:) (3:05) Roy D. Mercer - "Dead Hamster"
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did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshiper who sold his soul to Santa?
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Why did the cow cross the road? To go to the moooovies.
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He kid:(to teacher) Sir, Can a she kid conceive? Teacher : No. How can they, for they're to underaged to become conceived. He kid:(shouting to the she kid beside) You hear! Don't I tell you before that a she kid can't do it!
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Q: What do you get, when you crossbreed a horse with a parrot? A: 30 years. (It's agin the law, you know.)
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