I had just recently cheated on my boyfriend and I know that if I tell him about it he will break up with me. I don't want that to happen so should I just keep quiet or come clean?
by 
deanna87
ANSWERS: 23
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Something is not right in the relationship if you cheated on him. I can't advise you what to do, but you need to evaluate the relationship or yourself because something is out of wack.
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Do not tell him. You are probably not old enough to go steady anyway. It's time for experimentation. Have fun, and live while you can. Don't suppress yourself. Do what comes natural. Be especially sure not to listen to the puritan fringe that so often fills these columns and our country.
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Here's how I feel about it and my wife agrees: You are a flesh and blood creature of God. Your natural urges were put there by, guess who? God. Follow them. Don't hurt others so keep what you do to yourself. Be discreet.
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So basically, you want to do the crime, but aren't willing to do the time. Come clean, and if he dumps you, you deserve it for breaking his heart. Wouldn't you do the same if he cheated on you? How would you feel if he cheated on you? Wouldn't you want to know? Think about it. Cheating is wrong, if you get caught for it (And even if you haven't) you should be "punished".
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If you don't come clean, you don't actually have a relationship anymore - you have a lie. Not telling him doesn't protect the relationship, it protects the lie. So what's the point in not telling him? It's the only chance you have to salvage the relationship.
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This is an easy fix, no matter what you do the truth will eventually come out then you will be crushed and yes he will probably leave you as he should. I understand you dont want that to happen but in all honesty if you cheated you do deserve it. You need to come clean and live the rest of your life guilt free, otherwise ,if you are a decent human being, you will feel bad about it for the rest of your relationship and that itself will end it. Relationships are built on honesty not deception!
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if you really like him dont say anything, BUT DONT CHEAT ANYMORE... amybe someday it would be blown over, or it will end late for some other reason.
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Tell him, get dumped, and take it like a trooper. You screwed up big time, and it's now time to pay the piper. Learn the lesson, move on and don't make the same mistake again. Otherwise you're just living a lie.
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I may sound a little bias because ive been in this situation before. But just because you cheated on him i can genuinely say to you it doesnt mean you love him any less. There could have been many issues that led to you cheating on him, and no one really has the right to question why exactly you did it. But either way you are compromising your relationship. You tell him and he gets mad and ends it. You dont tell him you have to live with the guilt. Or in the end he could find out. Which is what happened with me. Eventually if the guy really does love you and you know that you are in love with him, he will forgive you and you will know how to cherish your relationship. In my opinion you need to come clean. Him finding out from someone else is going to be twice as hurtful. If you love him you need to be honest, even if that means the end
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My advice is tell him, because not only did you cheat but you want to lie about it as well. Trust and honesty two big factors in a relationship. Talk it out, if he breaks up with you i cant say you didnt deserve it because you cheated on him. If you were him and he cheated on you my guess is you would stay. Women are more tolerable of a cheating S/O then men. You need to come clean before he finds out about it on his own, if that happens you are screwed double.
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For reasons like this is why i wont have a girlfriend for a long time.I am not saying you but i dont trust girls anymore and you should think about this stuff before you hurt the s/o or hurt your self.You are better of telling him and whatever happens is really your fault and i would expect the worst.
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Definately tell him. If you dont, the guilt will kill you. And he'll find out eventually anyway. Its better to hear it from you than someone else.
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The damage is already done. If you love someone why would you do that? There's really no fix for it either you go on knowing what you did and it ruins the relationship or you tell him. Either way it's a real toss-up and it won't matter which one you chose there's still going to be something broken. The right thing to do is to tell him. You may lose him but you may not.
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if you don't tell him you will do two horrible things to him, you've already done one by cheating on him, the second is decieve him by not telling him. its not fair on your boyfriend to not tell him. if it was the other way round, you wouldn't like to be kept in the dark would you? think about why you cheated, if you really loved your boyfriend you wouldn't have cheated. so perhaps its a sign that you don't want to be with him anymore. you cheated, and you have to take responsibility for your actions.
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ok i did the same thing as you but i told him because i wanted an honest relationship so if you want an honset relationship tell him but if you dont then keep it a secrect. ok
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tell him and deal with the consequences. he doesn't deserve to be lied to, especially after he was cheated on.
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Dont say a word, if you want this relationship to continue!!! If you tell him, he will always know what your capable of, and will probably cheat on you, and not tell you. Been there, done that....Good luck!
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Wow, always a tough one... guys DO NOT deal with this well. We kinda feel like we have to get rid of you, even if we don't want to, or we're a fool. You probably should tell him though... he'll likely find out at some point and its best to get it over with.
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im sorry, but I hate questions like these...it just shows how people can be even to the ones they love....but if you dont come clean, then you are forever lying. and that is not showing love for your boyfriend. in a sense, its selfish....not trying to be rude, just being real.
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Ohhhhhhhhhhhh wow my own experience ..... Please tell him only the truth will set u free but be ready for lotanger even losing him when u confess It's up to u , stay with him with ur heart in pain , living a lie. Or be honest and true even if it means life without him
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If my girlfriend did that and ever found out about it later, it would be a guaranteed relationship killer. If I found out by them tellin me , it probably would be too, but just maybe, maybe it might survive it. But no way if they kept quiet.
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Would you break up with your bf if he cheated on you?The best way to come clean is to stop cheating. Apparently your definition of 'boyfriend' is someone you don't have to be exclusive with. Don't let your honesty with him be elusive too.
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First off what made or caused you to cheat on your boyfriend?? Step out of your shoes and step into some else's for a minute and say to yourself, if it was a friend of mine who came to me about this situation what advice would I give her or him, and my answer to you would be you should sit him down and tell him the truth as that is the best thing to do as it will hurt him a lot and break the two of you up or maybe he will stay with you, just be honest with both him and yourself, because if you don't someone else will and it will hurt him even more with hearing it from a third party..
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