Why do so many men expect a woman to take their surname after marriage while simultaneously refusing to consider changing theirs?
by 
AntigoneRising
ANSWERS: 12
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Probably because it's tradition. In my opinion I wouldn't like it if my future husband didn't expect me to take his surname and I would think it was weird if he wanted mine. I don't mean offence to men who've taken their wife's last name.
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Traditions run deep, is the only reason I can come up with. Some intresting notes I found: In Belgium women will use thier maiden name for offical purposes, and also for most private purposes too. In China women do not change thier name after marriage, although, in earlier times she did adopt her husbands name and attched it to her own with the 'shi' suffix. In Korea Korean women do not change their names upon marriage. By name alone, a woman cannot be identified as someone's wife. Neither are they addressed in fashion similar as 'Mrs. (Husband's family name)'. They are simply addressed by their family name; however, it is more specifically as 'wife of (Husband's family name)' when the relation has to be known. So most of these issues stem from the english speaking countries. Neat huh? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/N%C3%A9e
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Tradition mainly... though there are several cultures where the woman just adds the husband's name to her surname, and where the husband takes his wife's surname. Mostly I guess it depends on the culture and tradition of where you are from
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Because that's the way its been done for thouseands of years. And traditionally the man has been the head of the household, even if they were a partnership. But some places each keep their name though it's usually to show whihc sex you are, like sun or dauttor. Tradition also said women left their family and JOINED the man's family, so thus the name losing.
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Because women choose men primarily on status (mostly money and influence) while men choose women primarily on attractiveness. Sure, other factors are involved, but those are tie-breakers - very few attractive women end up with poor guys and very few rich men end up with ugly women, period. So, basically, a woman's changing her name signifies her submission to the man. It is a very public way to show that she acknowledges her bond with and dependence on her husband. This sense of submission is precisely why many women object to taking their husband's name now. It is also why so few men would ever consider changing theirs; men might be willing to make a symbolic statement that their marriage is equal (i.e., no name changes for anyone) but a public statement of submission is just out of the question. The other men would laugh him into oblivion. I think few women would respect such a man, either, even if they briefly enjoyed the feeling of being progressive about name-changing customs.
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It's the way it's always been done - not everyone questions tradition. I tried to persuade my wife not to change her name when we got married... 10 years later I suspect she wished she'd listened to me
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Well traditionally, its another symbolization of 'slavery'. See back in the old days towns were smaller. Everyone knew everyone else. Hey john Barksley, and this is john barksley's wife. Ms Barksley. Back then that was how they knew who was taken who wasn't. Aka who had the claim on who. But today the world's to big, and people don't care about crossing someone elses spouse. So its not that big of a deal anymore. But still some men, expect the woman to take the last name because 'thats how its always been'. Remember women didn't exactly get rights til the mid 1900's.
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Well historically & traditionally woman have taken their partners surname.... do men simultaneously refuse to consider it, or is it a case of it never being proposed as an option? I know that double-barreled surnames are becoming increasingly popular, so clearly men are prepared to be flexible once they twig there are options.
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Because its just what is done. I know in Vietnam it is not done. My ex-mother-in-law didn't take her husband's surname until after they moved to the states. She got sick of having to prove that they were married because everyone just assumes that you take their name. - I knew one man who took his wife's surname. His name was Hooker, and she said, "I'm not going to be a Hooker!"
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We have overblown ego's
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Why do so many women expect the man to buy her a diamond ring before marriage while simultaneously refusing to consider buying him one?
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Do so many men refuse to consider changing their surname or are you making a large assumption there? My wife never asked me to consider it because she hated her last name so much. I don't think many men are asked if they want to take their partners name. We have to be given the option in the first place in order to refuse it.
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