Is someone kissing your ears a turn on or a turn off?

That is gross.

Comments

Not sure where you stand on pre marital kissing, but have you ever tried it?
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by SoulFire on November 25th, 2009
Have you ever even kissed your girlfriend, NICK? A LOT of women find being kissed on the neck and ears to be very romantic and arousing.+points anyway
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by Vaporeongirl on November 25th, 2009
Yes of course, I kiss my girlfriend every day. We even go so far as to make out. I love it it's very intense and beautiful. The ear thing is gross though.
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by N I C K on November 25th, 2009
I don't think it would go over well if I went for her ear. I wouldn't mind doing it to her, but it would gross me out if she tried something like that.
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by N I C K on November 25th, 2009
Wasn't sure I knew an evangelical when I was a teenager and he didn't even hold hands with his girlfriend cause he was told it was inappropriate.
Some women get all googley legged if you lightly blow on their ear or give little love pecks. Now some women are all about the tongue. Ears are really sensitive so they can be erogenous zones. You should ask your girl if it is something she would like. Its always good to know how to turn them on, even if you are saving it for marriage.
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by SoulFire on November 25th, 2009
Always ask first before you go anywhere, it's good to know your boundaries, like if you didn't tell her you thought the ear thing was gross she may go for it and you would be totally turned off and she wouldn't necessarily know why.
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by SoulFire on November 25th, 2009
I do think it's wrong to do this stuff with a girl you're not serious about. But if I'm marrying her I'm pretty sure God wants us to have these moments together. She's literally the only girl I've ever kissed which might sound shocking to most people considering I'm 20.
I really doubt I'll try the ear thing. I tried her neck before but she told me to stop. I guess I was getting too close to her body or something.
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by N I C K on November 25th, 2009
That's why it's good to talk and set boundaries before hand, this way you don't go somewhere they don't want you going. But it is good you both feel comfortable and safe enough to stop each other without having hard feelings.

I don't think it's shocking about the kissing thing. I didn't meet my first boyfriend till I was 17 and he is now my husband of 15 1/2 years.

So have you proposed yet? How long are you going to wait till you get married?
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by SoulFire on November 25th, 2009
Oh I don't know, don't remind me. At least another year. She seriously talks about getting married and having babies almost every day. I mean I want to too, but I'm not obsessed with it. It's a little scary.
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by N I C K on November 25th, 2009
She's a woman. And since she believes in being a good submissive wife as a life career I can see why she would want to get started now. After we got engaged we waited two more years to get married. Then we were going to wait longer to have kids. But we decided we didn't want them after a while, so we were glad we waited.
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by SoulFire on November 25th, 2009
Yeah I guess women love the idea of getting married. Is it a bad sign if the main reason I want to get married is to have sex with her? I mean I really love her more than anyone and want the other stuff too, but I want to get married ASAP because I want to have sex with her really bad. She cares mainly about the family stuff I think.
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by N I C K on November 25th, 2009
No it's not bad of you Nick, sex is awesome. If you know you love her and want to marry her go for it. I'm sure she wants to have sex just as bad as you do. Set boundaries when it comes to the family stuff. Say you want to have a family too, but you also want to make sure your family will be financially sound. So that would mean after your post secondary education and when you have a good enough job to support both you, her and children. It can take up to a year to plan a wedding depending on the size of it. So proposing would give her the time to plan a good wedding. Then after you are married take a couple of years to get to know each other both sexually and within a marriage. Things are different once you start living with someone. It's best to have a strong marital relationship before you have kids. Work out any kinks that usually come up in the first to years, so that you can have a strong united front when you finally do have kids. They take 9 months to have as well.
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by SoulFire on November 25th, 2009
Plus once you have kids the sex life slows down a lot. So you don't want to jump into having kids, you want to enjoy each other and your honeymoon stage of the marriage before junior comes along to barge in on your love making.
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by SoulFire on November 25th, 2009
Nick- what do you know about body kissing?!
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by Violet on November 25th, 2009
I don't know anything about body kissing, Violet. I've never even really touched a girl's body.
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by N I C K on November 26th, 2009
Thanks for the advice, Soulfire. I just feel kinda bad about marrying a girl because I want to get into her pants, while she wants entirely different things.
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by N I C K on November 26th, 2009
Than how can you say it is gross. I think you would like it
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by Violet on November 26th, 2009
Nick when you get married you are going to have the time of your life let me tell you. I recommend you get a book on making love so you don't go in blind. Most women need about 30 minutes of foreplay to be stimulated enough for the big O. Also 80% of women need clitoral stimulation to have the big O. Hope I'm not being to sexual for you, I just want your first time and hers to be very pleasurable. Especially if you are both not experienced. And remember it may hurt her the first few times so go slow even if you are really excited. Tell her to set the pace, like "faster" or "slower" I know this is way early for this education but at least now you have it. Come back here and ask for tips before you go on your honeymoon. Lots of experience on answerbag. And buy a book!
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
"Thanks for the advice, Soulfire. I just feel kinda bad about marrying a girl because I want to get into her pants, while she wants entirely different things."

Well first you love this girl and you want to spend the rest of your life with her. So that is not the only reason you are marrying her.

Did you ask her if she is excited about having sex once you are married. I know as a woman I was. Women orgasm just like men do and it feels wonderful. I would talk about what you both expect out of a marriage. Like when you want to have kids and why. Then listen to her about when she wants to have kids and why. Tell her "I know this might sound like a sad guy thing, and I will always respect our faith and your innocence, I cannot wait to get married so we can see what all the fuse about having sex is? Do you feel the same way, is am I just being a guy?

Sex is awesome Nick, for guys and girls. Especially if you know how to press her buttons.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
Nick the fact that you are willing to respect her and love her enough to wait and not have sex until you are married is showing a great deal of restraint as a guy. You said you do love her right? And you want to marry her right? And you want to spend the rest of your life with her and not just marry her, have sex with her and then leave right?

Then no problem. The benefits of marriage is sex, lots and lots of sex. And tell her you don't want to have children right away cause you want to enjoy sex first. Because you know when kids come sex will slow down a lot. Ask her how she feels about this. She may not emphasis the sex because she wishes to be modest, or is unsure what sex will be like. She knows what having a family is like, odds are she has seen family or friends with a baby and how wonderful it all seems. Trust me once she has an orgasm for the first time with you, she will not be thinking about babies right away. She'll be thinking when and where again Nick.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
She doesn't talk about sex at all. I think she's like afraid of sex or something. If she ever notices that I have an erection or whatever she says its time to stop. I can't really talk to her about it, she's just not open to that kind of talk.
I really hope I can make her have orgasms and stuff when we're married. Is it hard to do that? Because I probably won't be able to last that long at first considering I don't do that at all (I don't even masturbate).
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by N I C K on November 26th, 2009
She is probably scared of sex cause she was told it will hurt the first few times. Also that if she has sex out of marriage she will go to hell, so when she sees that erection her mind flashes straight to hell a mood killer.

Yes at first you will probably go quickly. What I found was do it twice so first do it with your girl, it will happen fast. Then go back into foreplay mood. Get her hot and heavy by caressing her body, then nipples, a little more body and add in some great kissing.

It can be hard for a man to get their women to orgasm. To be brutally honest with you, I must self stimulate during sex to have one, lots of women are like this. Just remind her God gave her that button (clitoris) for a reason, to make sex better for her. So there is nothing wrong with her stimulating it within marriage during sex with her husband.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
There is a book called Tickle Your Fancy for women and it teachings them and you everything you need to know about stimulating yourself. Give it to her as a wedding gift and tell her you want to read it with her on the honeymoon so you can both learn to enjoy marital sex together.
There is also one called Tickle His Pickle, which teaches her how to please you.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
Not sure how your faith feels about "toys" but there is one now that she can wear while you are having sex that will stimulate her. But vibration is very intense so if she has never self stimulated before that might be way to much for her at first.

There is also the woman's G-Spot that you have to find with your fingers or a toy, so I'm not sure if that is permitted in your faith. But to do so you insert your fingers towards her bellybutton about two to three inches in there is a little hard button like spot. If you massage this you will see her react big time. This is the most intense orgasm there is for a woman. I know it would not be an option for you because for guys their G-Spot is in their anus. But don't worry they are just as amazing without you ever going near there, or so my husband says.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
If you really want and are brave enough have a "bachlore bachlorette party" thru Passion Parties. They have all kinds of different products to use from bubble baths and hand lotions. To back massagers and foot lotion for that perfect foot massage. They have foreplay stuff like feather ticklers and edible body powder. Then this is more wild stuff like edible lubrications or regular ones. To toys. A consultant comes to your home and they do a party. They tell you about all the products and all the different ways to use them. You get to taste and touch them before you buy. It is NOT vulgar or an orgy. NO ONE takes off their clothes, it is like a store coming to you to demo their products. They also give you tips and tricks about foreplay and sex. You can have the party with family as all ordering is done confidentially. Tell the consultant that you have a strict religious background and family will be there so nothing revealing please. There are very respectful of people's privacy.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
I know cause it's my job. I get a lot of people in the private order room ask me questions about sex all the time. So if you aren't sure about something you can always ask them, they have heard it all.

Have a party with your partner also opens up the line of communication regarding sex. You could say, wow I would never use those toys, crazy, but what about the body dust it might be something fun to try to learn each others bodies better, how do you feel about it? Or was there something there that you like.

Oh about lubrication some women can be horny as heck and still not have enough wetness for you to slide in and out conformably. So I recommend a water based lube for your honeymoon. You can get that at any pharmacy that sells condoms or a Passion Party consultant. It also helps keep a woman moisturizes like hand lotion for the vagina. It can be sore the first few times because of ripping the hymn and or stretching her vaginal canal.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
I don't want her to do any masturbation stuff when we're married. And there's NO WAY we would be involved in toys of any sort. That's not our thing, we're very conservative people. I mean I'll do whatever I have to to keep her happy with oral sex or whatever, ain't that good enough? I thought that was the big thing for women, oral sex?
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by N I C K on November 26th, 2009
Oh yeah, oral sex is great for women and orgasming. Wasn't sure you would be okay with that. As far as the self stimulation I did not mean independent of you, I meant when you were having sex for her to touch herself. Most women require clitoral stimulation to orgasm and it is really difficult for a man to do it for her while they are having sex.

But you could always try having oral sex and getting her almost to the point of orgasm and then using penetration, that can work cause she is already there. Or you could stimulate her clit for her with your fingers, again when almost there begin penetration.

Don't be discouraged if you don't get it on the first few try's. It takes a while to figure out what a girl likes, fast or slow, swirls or back and forth. Heck finding the clit the first time may take a while, took my man a half hour of just looking down there to find it.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
To find it you go from her vaginal opening straight up towards the belly button. Open up or go between her labia (the flaps inner flaps on either side protecting her hole. It will be right under neith where her labia's join at the top. Not underneath her outer flaps the inner ones. It will look like a small button. It will grow bigger when it is stroked or licked. Best to start really slow and ask her faster? or slower? Be gentle at first and when she is moaning you can go faster and start to press a little harder.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
Of course I am fine with oral sex, the Bible never says anything against it. It's one thing I actually really want to do with her.
So it's not that difficult to satisfy them with oral sex? I hope I can do it, I don't want her to be one of those frustrated Christian wives. Why did God make women so complicated? I probably won't even know what I'm looking at.
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by N I C K on November 26th, 2009
Well at first it will probably be difficult getting to know what she likes, be patient and don't give up. It took about a year for my man to know what really makes me feel good and two to do it perfectly. You probably will not know what you are looking at at first. And if she has never touched herself she would not be able to guide you. Use my advise with finding the clit and you will know cause she may jump off the bed the first time. It feels really nice but the pleasure can be startling at first. You will figure it out. Just tell her you want to satisfy her but you will need time to figure it out. Like driving a car you don't get it all right on the first time. Especially with out an instruction manual.
I think you will be fine with oral sex to have her orgasm. I just recommend you both wash well first before doing it. Some women have a slight odor that is odd at first to get used to. You could always try a flavored lubricant it is really not good for you, or if it's not for her.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
Women are very complicated. Men are so easy to "please" it seems really unfair, for the man trying to please her and the women who wants to be pleased.

Is masturbation a sin in the bible? I was told that as a Catholic growing up, but wasn't sure if that was a bible thing or a Catholic thing?
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
I ask because if a girl learns what gets her off she can teach you. But if it's a sin then you would have to learn together which makes it harder cause women can get frustrated.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
Masturbation is never spelled out as a sin, but its made pretty clear that it's not something we should do. Take 1 Thess. 4 for example:
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3It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4that each of you should learn to control his own body[a] in a way that is holy and honorable, 5not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; 6and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. 7For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.
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But my girlfriend has stimulated herself before, unfortunately. I actually asked her about it (it was really awkward- she got SO red) and she said that she has masturbated before and she does it sometimes. She's not too proud of it, and I really wish she hadn't done that ever. But if it helps us out when we're married I guess it's not that bad.
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by N I C K on November 26th, 2009
I think the biggest thing that is important from that verse is that it doesn't become a consuming habit. Since there is no passage that says masturbation is sexual immorality I would not consider it to be so. But I'm not a Christian or bible expert.

I don't think it would make her unholy to be able to teach her husband how to give her pleasure. It would if she were to make a person other then her husband. God put it on the outside of her vagina and generally the only way to stimulate it is via touch. So I would guess God wanted her to use it and know how to within the realm of marriage. Plus if she satisfies herself then she does not have to commit an unholy act with someone else before marriage to be satisfied.

Leviticus 18 goes over what is considered an immoral sexual act and masturbation is not mentioned in it.

But again I am no expert on the matter. I created a question for Christians so you might get better advice there. http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/1833203
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
If she knows what makes her feel good then it would be invaluable to the marriage bed. This way she can instruct you on what to do to make her feel good.
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by SoulFire on November 26th, 2009
Thanks for all the advice. I really can't wait until I'm married and can finally have sex with her. I hope I can satisfy her and stuff, I wonder if its wrong to pray about being able to give your wife an orgasm, lol.
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by N I C K on November 27th, 2009
LOL Of course not, why would it be. God gave her a clitoris to start with. I'm sure God wants you to have a satisfying sex life or he would not have created the ability to orgasm in the first place.
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by SoulFire on November 27th, 2009
I have one more question... So doesn't the woman get an orgasm from normal sexual intercourse? Does she at least get some pleasure from it?
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by N I C K on November 27th, 2009
Some woman about 20% can get an orgasm from normal sex. The G-Spot is located in the vagina.

Yes they still receive pleasure from normal intercourse. But it's nothing like the pleasure of an orgasm.
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by SoulFire on November 27th, 2009

oh baby! go N Go girl!
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by LEO on November 24th, 2009
I know lots of girls do....but once I found out about the ears and back.....I don't really even like being kissed on my neck
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by Anonymous on November 25th, 2009
I like the back and the ears too; but the neck...and it's over; I'm his! LOL!
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by Nancy on November 25th, 2009
LOL, everyone's got a weak spot
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by Anonymous on November 25th, 2009
no the neck is way better in the ear i cant feel enything just the feeling of being wet
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by brokenheart78724 on March 5th, 2010

I know plenty of guys who enjoy it also
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by Anonymous on November 25th, 2009
I would like it if a girl licked my ears.
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by I Am Gone on November 25th, 2009
I used to love when my ex would shove his toungue in my ear....makes me weak. I'm weird LOL
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by Anonymous on November 25th, 2009
No you're not.
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by I Am Gone on November 25th, 2009
Good, I'm glad you think so
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by Anonymous on November 25th, 2009
Not weird at ALL, Gina, it's a great sensual/sexual sensation.
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by Randy D on December 7th, 2009
LOL, good to know
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by Anonymous on December 7th, 2009

Really? I used to love when my ex would practically shove his toungue in my ear lol
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by Anonymous on November 24th, 2009
i can't stand that! it just bugs me. haha. idk why...
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by ard munch on November 24th, 2009
LOL, different strokes for different folks
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by Anonymous on November 24th, 2009
well said :]
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by ard munch on November 24th, 2009

Really!?!
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by Anonymous on November 27th, 2009
Really.. below the ear is a different thing. LOL
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by j ninja... on November 27th, 2009
LOL, Different strokes
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by Anonymous on November 27th, 2009
:)
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by j ninja... on November 27th, 2009

Question

Is someone kissing your ears a turn on or a turn off?

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