In the location of your choice, which would you choose: a rambling old ivy-clad stately home, a cosy oak-beamed cottage with roses round the door, a luxury penthouse suite in the city, a turreted castle on a hill, a yacht ,or a safari lodge?

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• Now that would be a cracking place to live! Lovely part of the world, too, Dumfriesshire. Good choice, Scooby. :-)

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• Thanks winkie! :-) I visited caerlaverock last summer on my way back home through Scotland after my holiday on Arran, it is indeed a lovely place & one that made quite an impression on me Too! :-)

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  by Scooby on November 22nd, 2009

• Arran's a nice place too, did you have any of the whisky?

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• Ohhh yeah!! :-) did I !! Lol...

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  by Scooby on November 22nd, 2009

• Good man! :-)

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• I like a good whisky! a nice night cap before bed! :-)

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  by Scooby on November 22nd, 2009

• Me too. What's your favourite?

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• Dalwhinnie Single Malt is my very favourite but there’s loads I love to drink, Laphroaig, Macallan, Lagavulin, Talisker, to name but a few!! ;-)
  How about you?? what's yours??

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  by Scooby on November 22nd, 2009

• Wonderful stuff. You've named my top two in your list: Laphroaig and Talisker. I love them all but I like the peaty smoky ones best of all. Dalwhinnie isn't far from where I live and I've never been to the distillery, what a dreadful oversight that is now that I think of it. Note to self: get thee to the distillery!
  Thanks for the friend request by the way, delighted! :-)

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• Great stuff!! :-) Ive been to the distillery myself all be it a few years ago now on my way up to Inverness! it's a great stop off point for a bite to eat to as well as a few sample tastes of the good stuff!

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  by Scooby on November 22nd, 2009

• I'll take your recommendation as a good reason to go myself.

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• You'll thoroughly enjoy it!! I certainly did! :-)

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  by Scooby on November 22nd, 2009

• I'll let you know how I get on.

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• :-) Oh I think I already know! :-)

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  by Scooby on November 22nd, 2009

Comments

• Where would it be?

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• perhaps Germany,Ludwig made quite a few and there are English castles I would like to be in,some reportedly haunted and the like:)

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  by mtndewman44 on November 22nd, 2009

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• Interesting answer. I work with someone who has a bunker in his garden. It was built during the war and it's still there. When he bought the house he didn't even realise it came with a bunker and was most surprised. I think it's an excellent thing to have in the garden.

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• Probably makes a good root cellar. My house is mostly underground, built it that way for energy efficiency but it gives a very secure feeling also.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 22nd, 2009

• That's what I thought, he should keep things in there that need the dark cool air, such as wine. Your house sounds most unusual and very cosy. It makes me think of badger's house in The Wind in the Willows, if you're familiar with that.

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• Yes, or a Hobbit house. Not the film, but the way Tolkien wrote it and I visualize in my head.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 22nd, 2009

• I haven't seen the film of the Hobbit but I have read the book and have an idea of what you mean. It sounds very attractive, especially at this time of year where I am and it's all stormy outside. The urge to hibernate appeals quite strongly.

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• That massive stone fireplace in the living room was constructed more for the comforting feel of an open fire than for heating. Got a wood fired boiler for that. My area (central Maine) has seen some snow already.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 22nd, 2009

• I wish that I could hibernate until the first week of January. This holiday season always deepens my depression.All the crowds and false cheerfulness...

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 22nd, 2009

• Wow, a massive stone fireplace? That sounds wonderful, so cosy. A lot of people find this time of year depressing, my brother is very depressed at the moment and can't seem to drag himself out of it. Strangely enough, my sister thinks he's autistic.

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• He really should get tested then. The form of it that I have is particularly nasty (Aspergers Syndrome) because it takes away the ability to socialize, but leaves the desire. Many with autism just don't care. I was diagnosed too late to do anything about it that are now being done with kids and teens. Back when I was a kid in the '60s I was just classified as a "bad kid". Puzzled the school authorities that a boy with a 188 IQ score and almost perfect academic performance could get into so much trouble. Being a rebel was the only was I could get positive attention from other children. I realize now that they were just laughing at me behind my back and encouraging me because it was amusing for them to watch me bait authority figures. I had higher verbal skills at 10 than most of the teachers and administrators. I finally realized at about 15 what the other kids were doing to me and just withdrew socially from that time on.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 22nd, 2009

• That must have been a very confusing childhood, but perhaps it was some sort of relief to find out that you have a recognised condition. Not that sticking a label on someone solves the problem, mind you. I wonder if my brother would get tested, I might suggest it to him. Right now he can barely make any decisions, even about the simplest of things, because he's so depressed, so it might be an idea to wait till he's a bit more able to cope with new ideas. It sounds to me as if he has something very similar to what you have, although he never caused trouble at school, he just got on with his studies quietly and was bullied for being an outsider. He really wants to be sociable, have friends and be in a happy and stable relationship, but he never seems to be able to go about it in the right way. People, including me, find him very difficult to be with and his manner puts people off. I feel for him but I don't know how to help, because communication is so difficult.

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  by winkie on November 23rd, 2009

• He sounds very much like me. I want things socially that I can't have because I lack the skills and the aptitude to acquire them. I was bullied until I learned some martial arts skills. But the physical bullying then just gave way to being socially ostracized. Being able to break someone's arm doesn't help at all with that. So I just became a loner. Now, there are very specific kinds of "coaching" therapy for children and teens. But it's like learning a language; very easy for a child, difficult or impossible for a middle-aged person. I always knew, long before being diagnosed, that other "normal" people had some kind of "magical" ability to read faces and body postures, etc. that I didn't have. There is something about eyes that I find completely baffling; looking into another person's eyes is painful and frightening to me. I have no idea why, since they convey no information to me, at least at a conscious level.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• Probably with your brother, step #1 is to get the depression under control. I've had a continual problem with that because every drug tried so far doesn't work. Of course my drinking may have something to do with it also. I refuse to give up the one comfort I have unless the doctors can give me something that works at least as well.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• How is his situation affecting you? Caregiver?

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• Sorry to hear you also have trouble with depression and haven't been able to find any suitable medication. I can't blame you on the drinking front, if that's the one thing that gives you some sort of comfort then where's the incentive to give it up? Very nice of you to ask how my brother's situation is affecting me. I'm not much of a caregiver, I'm afraid, because I find it so difficult to communicate with him, but worrying about him does keep me off my sleep at times. My dad's very good, talking to him for hours on end and encouraging him to take control of his life, but I know he finds it hard going. He (my dad) is 80 and I don't think he expected to spend his twilight years looking after his son. I think it's supposed to be the other way round when you reach that age, but thankfully he's totally compos mentis, otherwise I don't know who'd put all the effort in with my brother. My mum also suffers from depression so she can't really summon the energy required to deal with it.

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  by winkie on November 23rd, 2009

• So your brothers condition is much worse than mine. I can at least earn a rather good salary. I probably couldn't survive the type of work you do, close proximity to other people on the ship. Are you the only lady on the ship usually? I don't mean to sound sexist, I'm just curious how many women are interested in work with that kind of physical hardship.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• I've been to Norway several times. The company I work for is a subsidiary of Nammo. One of the unclassified things I did was invent the Mk211 .50cal/12.7mm (Raufoss) projectile. The one the ICRC wants to ban.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• His condition is bad at the moment because of the depression. He is in quite a good academic job (speech technology research) but unfortunately the funding's running out at the end of December and so he has to find something new, which is proabably a large part of the reason he's so down just now. He's 47 and this is the only job he's had since graduating. Onboard ship it can get a bit claustrophobic at times, but thankfully so far I've always had my own cabin, which has been a godsend because I really need my own space. I've never yet been the only girl onboard, which I think has been a lucky fluke, but we are certainly considerably outnumbered by men. That has its good points and bad points, bad when sharing communal toilets!

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  by winkie on November 23rd, 2009

• Wow, I've never known anyone who actually got paid to invent things, that's amazing to me. Why do they want to ban it? Which parts of Norway have you visited? It's a beautiful country and I've been lucky to work there quite a bit. My only complaint with the place is that they charge exorbitant prices for truly dreadful beer.

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  by winkie on November 23rd, 2009

• Poor guy. I'm only 6 years older than him,I can imagine what's going through his head. If I'd been let go at that age I don't know what I'd do. Just by pure luck I'm in a massively profitable industry. Although somewhat ethically-challenged. I don't even have Alfred Nobel's excuse, everything I work on is for killing and destroying.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• Thanks for your empathy, and for being so honest about your work. I think that being the way he is, autistic or whatever, it scares him to think that he has to perhaps move into a new field and start something completely new. He doesn't like change and it will be especially difficult if he has to move outside the security of academia, which has been a good home for him.

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  by winkie on November 23rd, 2009

• I've been in southern Norway, the company HQ is about 100km north of Oslo.Speak very little of the language. The company I work for is a subsidiary of a subsidiary. Weird corporate takeover games. My situation is very similar to academia, only I can't share my work with colleagues in other companies the way university researchers can.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• Your brother's dislike of change is a key flag in autism spectrum disorder diagnosis.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• I've read everything I can get my hands on about autism and Aspergers Syndrome since being diagnosed. The diagnostic test is available online you know. I'll look up the link for you.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• It's a shame you can't share your work openly, but I suppose it's inevitable in your line of business. Thanks very much, if you can find the diagnostic test online I'll certainly pass it on to my brother.

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  by winkie on November 23rd, 2009

• The Scandenavians don't know how to brew proper beer.Give me Pilsner Urquel or Bass Ale anytime. They have ridiculously high taxes on everything. The people here in the US who complain about high taxes have no idea how good they have it. Of course in the Nordic countries almost everything is provided by the state

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• Here's the site with the test; http://aq.server8.org/ I scored a 45 on this one (moderate to severe).

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• Thanks very much, I'll pass it on. You're right, if people want to complain about taxes they should try living in Scandinavia! As you say though, they are looked after from cradle to grave and the system seems to work well for them.

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  by winkie on November 23rd, 2009

• If I remember correctly,Norway's lowest income tax rate is higher than the highest rate in the US. I'm in the top bracket and only pay a marginal rate of 38.5% (going up soon,no doubt). A janitor in Norway pays about 40% on the entire income.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• Just did some fact-checking. Norway's lowest rate is 28% and goes up steeply. I'd be paying well over 50% if my income was taxed there. Plus high VAT, real estate taxes, investment income, etc.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• I'm going to send you my e-mail address in case you have any questions, such as about autism, that you don't want to put on a public site. I don't post mine; the last time I did I was drowned in offers for everything from auto parts to dating services.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

• Thanks, that's very nice of you, I look forward to receiving it. I have sometimes wondered if I'd like to live in Norway, it feels like home to me, perhaps because it's just across the North Sea from Scotland. I've been subjected to Norwegian tax after working in their waters, but luckily the company I was working for reimbursed me. They didn't reimburse me for 40% tax in Danish waters though, and I wasn't too pleased about that, especially as I had no choice in the matter of where I worked.

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  by winkie on November 23rd, 2009

• Ouch! So you get taxed in the country whose waters you're working in and have to pay UK taxes too? In the US if you pay taxes in one state you can get credit for them in other or on your federal income tax. You'd think the EU would have sorted out all that double taxation bit by now.

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  by Stranger in a Strange Land on November 23rd, 2009

Comments

• Sounds lovely, doesn't it? :-)

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

• it is :)

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  by DendrinaLovesTrees on November 22nd, 2009

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• Dash it all, he's a fiend. Methought thou mightest choose the castle, brave one.

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  by winkie on November 22nd, 2009

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