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by LuckyLefty on March 27th, 2007

LuckyLefty

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Are us men expected to tell girls "why" we love them? What should you say if the girl asks & wants specifics? Ladies seriously, what do you wanna hear?

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Answers. 35 helpful answers below.

  • by BobSaccamano-is-back on March 27th, 2007

    BobSaccamano-is-back

    My longest standing girlfriend once complained that I never said anything nice to her, we were coming up on our 1 year anniversary and so for a present (the best gift I've ever given) I sat down over the next few days, and I wrote down 365 things that I loved about her, it was great and she loved it. Maybe try something similar, she really did love it, and it meant a lot to her.

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  • by unknown on March 27th, 2007

    unknown

    I assume if a girl askes that question that she wants the truth about why you love her; and, I think that that is exactly what you should tell her. I personally don't ask dumb things like that because I wouldn't know what to say in that circumstances. She may just be a little insecure of your love and is trying to reassure herself. I will usually come right out and tell someone what I am feeling but not all women do that.

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  • by Anonymous on January 20th, 2008

    Anonymous

    I don't think you're expected to do so, unless you're asked to do so, and in that case the truth is usually the best answer :)

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  • by Apples on May 1st, 2009

    Apples

    i ALWAYS HAVE BEEN ALWAYS FELT ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS, ANYONE CAN MAKE A LIST AND RECITE IT AND NOT MEAN A WORD OF IT. BUT IF YOU ARE CONSTANTLY DOING LITTLE SWEET THINGS HEAR AND THERE THAT YOU KNOW MEAN A LOT TO HER, EVEN IF IT IS NOT OF MONETARY VALUE. SHOW HER YOU LOVE HER AND THEN SHE'LL HAVE NO REASON TO EVER ASK! HOWEVER, IF YOU FEEL THE NEED TO TELL HER THE THINGS YOU LOVE ABOUT HER, PLEASE BE SURE TO INCLUDE MORE THAN JUST HER PHYSICAL ATRIBUTES...WHENEVER MEN JUST LISTED HOW WHAT WAS SO PHYSCIALLY ATTRACTIVE ABOUT ME ALL THE TIME...I SENSE THEY ONLY LOOK AT ME FOR ONE REASON AND THAT WAS FOR A PHYSICAL REASON....SEX!

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  • by Im BACK on September 7th, 2008

    Im BACK

    No, you're not expected to tell us women anything. Go into detail if you want, but most girls already know why you love her :)

    And if a girl asks, give her the cold, hard truth.

    Seriously I dont care for the I love you, you're cute baby, or I cant take my eyes of you.

    I want to hear what you honestly think about me, not some foolish crap. Actions do speak louder than words.

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  • by maria123 on September 7th, 2008

    maria123

    yes of course you are..if you don't tell her why you love her she wouldn't know either... you shouldn't ask us what to tell your lady or how to tell her..you should search deep inside of your heart and ask yourself why do I love this woman? if you even love her. If you love her then there has to be an answer in your heart. Just tell her how you feel.
    Can you please answer mine i'm very confused.http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/956617

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  • by FF in training on January 20th, 2008

    FF in training

    if shes asking that it underlyingly means that she feels you need to tell her more some qualities about her that she may be self concious about. like if she is worried that her skin is dry, mention to her one day that her skin looks beautiful. because it probably does. and theres points for you. or if you catch cher looking in the mirror at her glasses, tell her how sexy they are. because they probably are. see what im getting at? what you should really be doing is BE MORE OBSERVATIVE. that is what it all comes down to.

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  • by RockRchick on June 2nd, 2007

    RockRchick

    I think if a chick asks that kinda question shes insecure and needs compliments to make her feel better, but if shes not askin you then I dont think you should have to just randomly tell her why. If Im getting told I love you by my boyfriend and I love him back I just understand that we have a chemistry. We love eachother, whats to question about that?

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  • by shawnyshawna on September 7th, 2008

    shawnyshawna

    you've got to just think about what the truth is. What about the way she is makes you love her? Please don't say "because i just do"...it's unfulfilling to hear that. What little things she does make you love her more? The way she touches her hair or smiles in different ways or kisses you a certain way? The way she treats other people? Her outlook on life? Her approach to tough situations or strength? Her beauty? Go into detail...don't just say you're beautiful and nice...you'd say something like...I love the curve of the small of your back or some other parts of her body or face...etc. etc...really think about it. If you are bad with words like this...look at romantic poetry for inspiration...don't actually use it word for word...but just to give you some ideas.

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  • by somewhere Pll loves her dawgy on September 7th, 2008

    somewhere Pll loves her dawgy

    Those little things about us that make you smile or feel fuzzy silly inside. That makes you want to lean over and kiss us spontaneously or give a playful swat on the arse (well that's one *I* like anyway..)coz you feel sooo lucky to think we've chosen to be with you out of anyone else!. Stuff that we do, that makes you think NO other girl could do that - just like she does.! Not generic things that could pertain to just anyone! Specifics. Seriously :)

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  • by Shaz4726 on January 20th, 2008

    Shaz4726

    i wud like to hear the truth and that u mean it..

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  • by Ausbabe on March 27th, 2007

    Ausbabe

    How about you treat females with the same respect you afford males. You start your question with 'Men' and then 'Girls'. It's either boys and girls or men and women. If you're not prepared to treat women as your equals you could be in for some rocky relationships. As for your question itself...
    If you're with someone who'se feeling rather insecure it could be because she may be dealing with her own issues - in which case, you can only reassure her of your feelings.

    It's more to do with 'don't tell me, show me'. 'Actions speak louder than words' etc. So if you want to get the message through to the 'woman' in your life, show her how you feel.

    I guess everyone wants to know they're special and if you honestly can't find 5 nice things about the woman you're with, you may be with the wrong one.

    So treat her like an equal and show her how you feel.

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  • by Gracin the Strange on March 27th, 2007

    Gracin the Strange

    We want to hear that we are funny, smart, witty, that when you hold us or look in our eyes you feel complete and good stuff like that. Cause you got a "bangin bod" doesnt work quite as well as the inside stuff. Sometimes its nice to hear your significant other shower you with compliments.

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  • by rebellious angel on June 10th, 2011

    rebellious angel

    she wants to know the unique things you love about her - qualities and the way you guys mesh that no other girl has

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  • by Ganja_Goddess on July 3rd, 2009

    Ganja_Goddess

    We want to hear the small things. Like the moments that you look at her and know how much you adore her. Just say what you feel. You shouldn't have to rehearse it.

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  • by Ruby Doomsday on January 20th, 2008

    Ruby Doomsday

    Something nice, I guess. You shouldn't be constantly asked why you love a person, but every so often it's nice to hear why you are special! Men like to be told these kinds of things now and then too, don't they? :)

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  • by xxxxxxxxxx on March 27th, 2007

    xxxxxxxxxx

    we dont want you to just be like oh yeah i like you and i want to marry you. we want to know why because if we are truely in love with you, we want to know why you would want to spend your life with us, and if you would want to spend your life with us. to me there is more to liking a girl. what i mean is that you have to like her for something, and thats what she wants to hear. example: you like your gf/wife because shes caring, thoughtful, beautiful, etc...

    like my bf, i love him because hes been there for me through everything, hes funny, he keeps me sane, he teaches me to relax sometimes and just enjoy life. i feel like im a better person around him. those are the kinds of things girls like to hear. and usually guys dont like to go into that kind of detail. so we get a little self conscious sometimes and we need you to reassure us.

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  • by Anonymous on August 26th, 2009

    Anonymous

    The truth. By the way, I hope you're referring to women not girls. Girls are female children.

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  • by Allya on August 26th, 2009

    Allya

    We want to hear that you love us as much as we love you. Basically, when it comes to love, we want you to be like us. We want you to think about us and remember the reasons you want us around. We want to feel loved and appreciated for the things we do for you.

    There is no way around this question. You gotta answer and sound as sincere as possible.

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  • by TheJoker on July 3rd, 2009

    TheJoker

    Hahaha, I've always found if you say it's 'down to their intangible qualities' you usually get let off the hook!

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  • by Omar Little on July 3rd, 2009

    Omar Little

    No, love is a mystery that even the greatest scientists couldn't work out, so how the hell are we supposed to sum it up in a couple of sentences?

    You simply say "I love you, think yourself lucky, now where's my tea woman?".

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  • by phirad -you can call me Mike on July 3rd, 2009

    phirad -you can call me Mike

    Women like to know that you pay attention to them. If you point out the little things she does and the little things most people don't notice she will be much more appreciative of the fact that you noticed.

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  • by Chicago Lady on July 3rd, 2009

    Chicago Lady

    Ha! Be very careful before you go there! Women want to hear we are beautiful but also be listening for "unique" and "special" individual traits we have. If you just mention the physical that means you'd be attracted to every other woman who has those traits, (i.e., blond/brunette hair, big ___, small ___, etc.)

    Unless you know her very well and can come up with many unique and special details, stay away from that discussion! Besides, if you do really know her that well, she will not need to ask it, you both will be showing each other how you feel all the time.

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  • by Nuttsky on June 2nd, 2007

    Nuttsky

    We want to hear why you chose this woman instead of all the other ones out there - what we do that you like; what, about our looks, that you like; whether you think we're smart or funny or kind, and why. Catch us doing something you love and say so. We don't want to be "the most beautiful girl in the world" - we don't believe that anyway - we want a nice word about our eyes, or our smile. If we go to some trouble in dressing up, we'd love you to notice that. Like that. And specifics are greatly preferable to generalities. It's no accident that "special" and "specific" are related words....

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  • by Mushen on January 20th, 2008

    Mushen

    If you ask me (and I am a female), then any female who asks such a thing is leading you into dodgy ground. Be warned THIS IS A TRAP - you may find that you cannot say the right thing for saying the wrong thing. If I were you I would side-step the question with some waffling and change the subject. Either that or say "Now you come to mention it, I can't think of anything at all. Bye".

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  • by abcdefg on July 3rd, 2009

    abcdefg

    you are crazy, pathetic, disgusting. if u don't likemy question just leave it you idiot...

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  • by Anonymous on July 3rd, 2009

    If you're a great guy you'll tell her without being asked.
    For a girl to ask is humiliating. You should want her to know why you love her. And, mean it.
    You know why, but she would like to hear it. Over and over.
    Don't be like the guy who said, "I told you that I loved you when we got married. When I change my mind, I let you know".
    Telling her reassures her that she really is more special that the other girls that you dated.
    Go on now. Tell her why.

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  • by GLAM71 on July 3rd, 2009

    GLAM71

    just the truth, thats all i want

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  • by ladyshakespeare on August 25th, 2009

    ladyshakespeare

    i asked my husband this, but only AFTER I was firmly convinced that he does not love me. Why did I ask? Becasue I wanted so much to be wrong, wanted SOMETHING to believe in. Whatever you decide to say, dont say "because i have to." It wasnt the answer I was hoping for, but at least now i know the truth.

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  • by Anonymous on August 25th, 2009

    Anonymous

    I would agree with most of the answers here. Generally, girls are insecure and want to know what has really attracted the guys.

    Don't tell a girl that you love her for no reasons, because that will only make her more confused and worried. (I personally consider that evasive and heartbreaking when the guy leaves)

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  • by sozana on August 25th, 2009

    sozana

    Hey Lucky.. long time no see my friend..

    Honestly what most ladies wanna hear is the truth..maybe ur girlfriend felt that u dont take care of her as usual..and by her asking that question she would make u think of her..in some way.. trying to know what is it exactly that u loved about her.

    I think that shes so smart by asking u that question . :P

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  • by Mer on July 24th, 2009

    Mer

    Yeah.. Girls tend to be insecure- so even tho actions are louder than words- girls need to HEAR it. Not only do they want to be told they are loved, they want to know why- they want to know what it is about them that u value. It makes them feel needed and valuable. It also let's then know what characteristics they don't need to work on. Of course you should tell her she is beautiful, and a great body but don't focus on this. What about her personality were u attracted to? Is she funny, really sweet, loud, outgoing, quiet, can she hang like one of the boys, does she have good taste and style, will she do things with u even if they are not Her favorite, is she giving, does she look out for you, is she dedicated to her family, selfless, does she help people???... U get the idea. What do you have in common with her- be sure to mention that u do have things in common- it makes a girl feel like her view point is validated, and reminds her y she is with u.

    I know it's ridiculous. But these things are very important to women. They may know all the things they love about themselves but they wanna know what their man thinks. They want to feel special and irreplacable. They want to know that u think about these things instead of just "she's hot and a good lay". Lol women

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  • by jahaira on July 23rd, 2009

    jahaira

    look!!!!!!!!they just want to hear that u realy love her and u dont have no other girls around!!!u have to be nice with them and not only tell them tha u love her thas not enough!!ok

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  • by pushi1979 on July 24th, 2009

    pushi1979

    Yes the men are expected to say. The girls really love to know that. Also they like honest answers which are nice to hear. So if uve loved someone then it would be cause of good reasons only. So go ahead and tell them. But dont tell them many times cause they like men who are not crazy for them.

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  • by Anonymous on August 26th, 2009

    Anonymous

    I dunno what other ladies want to hear; I want to hear honesty. It doesn't have to be over the top and fancy. Tell her exactly what you like and appreciate about her. Be spontaneous and DON'T rehearse it, sounding scripted will defintely lose you points. If you tell her things that aren't true because you think they're what she wants to hear she is gonna know. Try not to freak out and get nervous about how she's gonna react.

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