Putting aside the idea that if you're filling you time fighting and bickering it doesn't sound like the "love or your life", my suggestion is to focus on yourself. If you can learn to love and accept yourself, without judgment, then you can learn to accept others. But you have to start with yourself. If you can't like and love you how can you expect another to do so? Then, if you can fully accept yourself you will find you can accept others as well.
Also, do not define yourself by your relationships.

Get some counseling because that's way too much pressure to put on another person and way too much insecurity to live with yourself.

I would say quit the bickering and come to some agreements on what is making you so upset, you need to reach some common space on the issues that you have, if you truly feel this way and don't see a way out, i suppose submit to what your partner wants. I do agree that counseling will help though, although it is very very hard to get some people to go.
Just try to reach some agreements on the issues, and lay down some rules otherwise it will be you the one that submits totally, if your S/O doesn't feel the same way.