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by Smurphy on March 23rd, 2007

Smurphy

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Have you ever had a stalker? If you have how bad did it get?

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Answers. 16 helpful answers below.

  • by Anonymous on May 26th, 2007

    Anonymous

    Yep. A guy that I dated for a few years suddenly went totally mental on me when I moved back into town after we'd been broken up for about six months. He found out through a mutual acquaintance where I was living and working, and he'd show up at my job or watch me through the windows of my house (I know he did this because he bragged about it in obscene emails he'd send me every day). He actually came into my house while I was at work one night, waited in the hall closet and watched me take a shower. I had a funny feeling that someone was there, so I barracaded myself in my bedroom and I heard him leave the house. He later confessed to having been there.

    In addition to all THAT creepiness he also;

    Let air out of one of my passenger side tires, then later gave me one hundred dollars to repair it.

    Hijacked my email account

    Told me that he had genital warts and totally ruined my fourth of july weekend (It was a lie, he never had genital warts).

    Oh, and he peed in my hall closet while he was hiding in there.

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  • by KagomeShuko on April 10th, 2007

    KagomeShuko

    Yes, I have - two times. One where the guy really was following me and learning about where I went and what I did (even though he had gotten married!) and another one who was close to doing that, but he was in another town and kept saying he liked this and that, but it what he said was really all lies and then made up really stupid things and told me that's how things were when they weren't and he'd supposedly go to conventions and meetings where I was, but if he did, I didn't know it and a friend helped me by inviting him to a barbecue or party when I was out of town so he couldn't follow me since he said yes.

    It's not fun, though.

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  • by Anonymous on March 23rd, 2007

    Anonymous

    A lazer sight mounted on an AR-15 rifle works wonders on a stalker. A female friend of mine had a wack job stalking her & threatening her. I don't know who, but "Someone" spotted the stalker across the street in his car, called him on his cell phone, and managed to aim a bright red lazer beam on his temple, and said bang, and hung up. The guy hauled ass and NEVER came back.There's no nice way to handle a stalker& the police won't do anything until someone is either hurt or dead . UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES try this yourself !!!!!!! In this particular case though, IT WORKED !!!

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  • by Nancy on March 13th, 2009

    Nancy

    Yes; but I never could find out who so I just lived in fear for a long time. I would get obscene phone calls from him all of the time, but only when my husband wasn't home; with the exception of one time. I always suspected it was someone who lived close by because they would call the minute I came in the door and one day when I came home from shopping with my daughter, I answered the phone and he said "just came in from shopping with the kid, huh". One day after work I was coming out of the grocery store and a guy ran up to me, handed me a big bouquet of flowers and said "beautiful flowers for a beautiful woman" and ran away! I didn't even really see his face. I later wondered if that was "my stalker". My husband was working one night and the guy called and told me he was coming over and that my husband wasn't really at work that he was with some woman. I was terrified; I called my husband at his job and he came home and stayed there. The police always told me they couldn't do anything because I didn't have any real proof and they couldn't do anything until he did something. This was before any stalking laws were in effect. So my husband bought me a 9mm Smith and Wesson, showed me how to shoot (I became a sharp shooter!), made me read every article or magazine or anything on how to protect myself. He also use to make me sit on the front porch to clean the gun and shot guns so if the guy was watching he would surmise that I could use the weapons. He called and told me he was coming over a second time and instead of getting scared, I got so pissed I told him to come on because me and Smith and Wesson were waiting for him! He didn't show up thank God! He completely stopped after that, but the fear lasted long after the phone calls stopped.

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  • by sassafrass on May 26th, 2007

    sassafrass

    Well there was this guy, about 25, who was convinced that he was going to marry me. He had been in and out of mental institutions, and was really really unstable. He freaked me out, seriously. I heard things about him becoming very violent and unpredictable. He began showing up at stores and sporting events where I was, and I caught glimpses of him driving past my home several times a day. It eventually stopped, luckily without any major incidences.

    I had another case when a guy showed up at my workplace almost every day, insistenting to see me. Apparently he thought I wanted to date him or something. He got so disruptive at times that my boss (who also has a job as a bouncer) had to remove him from the facility. He freaked me out a bit, because he would get angry and set things on fire.... But Id definetly say that the first was the worst.

    Im only 18, so hopefully I won't have more of this nonsense going on.

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  • by singwell-is off researching a lot on March 23rd, 2007

    singwell-is off researching a lot

    yes. at university.One day a middle aged man waved at me. I thought maybe he was someone I knew but had forgotten. I was about to return the wave when an older friend said to me:
    "Don't acknowledge him. He's a pervert. He's on the maths staff and he tries to pick up the girls all the time."
    but I kept seeing him everywhere on campus and it made me feel uncomfortable. Then, you wouldn't believe it, and neither did I, he rented the house opposite my parents'. I went to catch the bus one day, and there he was. I was so scared. He was always trying to sit next to me, and followed me onto the railway platform (we were going to exactly the same destination, remember!) I used to have to grab ladies and plead for them to pretend to talk to me. When they did, he would walk past. But on the train, he was always trying to sit beside me, and when he managed to, even if I ignored him, he would wave his hand in front of my face to try and get me to react.
    Now this guy was married and all....
    It stopped when he was transferred to an American University. So scary. How did he know where I lived? It couldn't have been a coincidence that in the whole of Sydney, he moved across the road from me, could it?
    (this was all before there were things such as stalking laws)

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  • by CaRbOnPrOdUcK is Baccuss on March 14th, 2009

    CaRbOnPrOdUcK is Baccuss

    I have one now. here. not bad

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  • by xanz on March 13th, 2009

    xanz

    A man i dated for 6 months and who had a rather visible position in my community and a good reputation did a complete flip on me when i tried to break it off. He managed to lash me to his truck door and nearly whipped me into unconsciousness. Somehow i got loose, but not before he did some pretty ugly damage.

    He then tracked me all over town, approached me in public, sent me emails, phoned my home endlessly and even approached my adult son with some vague innuendo. He parked across my street and watched my home, invaded my email, wrote my friends, followed me on other dates, watched from a distance, chased off men i was seeing claiming to be my husband and that i was mentally ill... threatening them if they reached for a cell phone, was found in my back yard at my bedroom window once, left notes in my mailbox, on my car windshield. He stalked me on sites like this and left comments following mine to insult and intimidate me and went from writing my obituary and emailing it to me, to begging my forgiveness and pleading to marry me. He always stopped short of much i could prove, using throw away emails, acting as if i were hysterical, that he meant me no harm. i was a nervous wreck for months, nearly two years.

    The couple of times i called the police, they walked off with him arm in arm and pretty much patronized me while he laughed about it. He had info on me i still don't know how he got. i was too ashamed to tell anyone who cared about me. i have never felt so helpless or vulnerable.

    And i was an advocate for victims of domestic and sexual violence for years. Imagine how humiliated i felt to be a victim myself? It just goes to show that it doesn't matter how smart one is, we all are vulnerable to the kooks of the world.

    i ignored him almost the whole time, though now and then my temper would flair and i reacted... he would only get revved up and i would advise anyone stalked to never give them notice... it just fuels the fire.

    One night, late, he happened on me at the grocery, and was pretty drunk. There was a mild tussle at my car and my cell phone was dead. i managed to get his and called a friend (some unknown guy, but the 1st in his address book). i told him he had five minutes and i would call the police to pick him up intoxicated in public. The "friend" arrived in 3 and he was passed out already.

    i then sent him an email and though the police had been no help before, i told him i was ready to stop at NOTHING, that i had better not hear one more word. It was a chance. That kind of thing usually only inflamed him.

    He eventually stopped, and it's been maybe 4 months now. i still dream, on occasion, that i am being chased, tortured, that i am dead... i wake in relief that it's over.

    Unlike some, there was so much guilt in having dated him... but if he reappears, i'm ready to do what i have to. There is also guilt in allowing him to move on, maybe even move on to another woman, maybe one who won't be so lucky.

    None of us deserve to live in fear and the fear is often so much worse than even the actual violence, what 'could' happen even more frightening that what did. Gentle thoughts to all who told their stories. May you all be safe and free.

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  • by Anonymous on March 13th, 2009

    Anonymous

    HORRIBLE! My ex-neighbor who works for a foreign government (I'm in D.C.), has been stalking me over 10 years! He uses his contacts to follow and harass me daily. They "accidentally" slam me in the shoulder as they walk by me, follow me and serve in front on my car and pretend they are going to crash into my car by swerving into my lane (they laugh when I look at them in disbelief), visit my retail business and say something extremely personal about me (only I should know) under their breath--I'm the only one to hear it. I know my house is under surveillance, my phone is tapped (operator said so) and my conversations monitored. The FBI requested an "interview" with me regarding some bogus and erroneous topic. However, the police (or whatever agency) has made it know to me that my family and I are being protected around the clock, but not officially. NOBODY believed my story in the beginning, because I didn't know who or what group was trying to destroy my life! I just recently learned my stalker's identity after he decided to make it known. He left a note in my newspaper which briefly said "someone loves you and knows what is best for you." He is a psycho! I am extremely depressed and am suffering from panic attacks. I don't even want to leave my house. What would you do?

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  • by Galeanda on May 26th, 2007

    Galeanda

    Many years ago, when I was just a kid, my mom or I had a stalker. He would peek through the windows and drop things through our mail slot, even peeking in thru it. We had a hard time getting th epolice there at the same time but he was caught. But back in those days they didn't do much to people. It was very scarey. It would only happen when we were home alone, when my dad was at work.

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  • by Carmella on May 26th, 2007

    Carmella

    please delete

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  • by P. W. Pasobrio loves Marines on March 23rd, 2007

    P. W. Pasobrio loves Marines

    I had a friend in high school that was convinced by a group of girls that her boyfriend and I were cheating on her. I broke off the friendship and she broke up with him for saying hi to me the next day. And it went down hill from there. She attacked him because he and I remained friends and would write stuff on the walls about us and leave stuff in our lockers. She had her friends corner me and threaten me. And she and her boyfriend would follow us and threaten to kill him and rape me. And the school would do nothing. The funny thing is she and I are friends again.

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  • by Ms.A on November 9th, 2009

    Ms.A

    The phone calls were bad enough,but then he started appearing at the same places I would be.He tried to start a fight with a friend of mine too.The worst was when he started suprising me when I would get out of my car at night.

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  • by numfortyone on November 9th, 2009

    numfortyone

    I have one now. Let's just suffice to say my life has changed drastically and horribly. One week I think my life's back to normal and I'm on vacation at the beach. I get home and there's a box of stuff from him. Or he lurks from behind the corner while I walk my dog almost running me over. Maybe he will one day? Who knows. The latest delivery he told me he's got a new mental illness that he has trouble taking his meds for..makes the Fort Hood rampage look probable in his future. I say this with complete sobriety. I would never* use that as an example if I did not fully mean it. This man is a loose cannon and I am constantly looking over my shoulder. I have had to move from my home 3 months out of the year for fear of him. My sister doesn't even want to be a witness in my hearing to get a protection order from him because he creeps her out. I don't blame her. He thinks I love him. I don't see how this is possible. He even sold his house to move across the street from me. That was a horrible time. Finally he moved because of his instability? Who knows- he can't even take care of himself. I think he was put in an institution- I heard from a reliable source. He makes my skin crawl.

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  • by Anonymous on March 13th, 2009

    Anonymous

    Yeap, i was like 12 and smart. He was so dumb and obvious. Who calls a kid saying "hey friend, do you like puppies?" and wears a long over coat i just kept walking and when he didnt stop i started to scream so loud. lol, that scared him away for a little bit.
    The last time i saw him he was inside in an ambulance have naked and sayed he had a drug overdose.

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  • by Sheriff Raff -Answerhag on May 26th, 2007

    Sheriff Raff -Answerhag

    Yes, it was a four legged type.

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