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by Nutsy_Rail on October 11th, 2009
No. It is a mistake for men to wear shorts on airplanes. Why? Let me tell you why.
Reason #1 - After ascending to cruising altitude, the air becomes dry. Now, the testiclates are the most sensitive parts of our bodies. When the dry air reaches and circulates around said testiclites, this affects the skin in a negative way. The skin becomes chapped with dryness, which becomes a condition known as "chapsticles" or chapped-testiclatoids. It is not easy to explain to your family why you have to go to the bathroom to apply chapstick. It just isn't right.
Reason #2 - Have you ever had dandruff? Well, earlier I mentioned the dryness of the air circulating into the shorts and testicletes. Once it becomes dry in there, the publical hair developes dandruff from all the dryness. In case you haven't checked, grocery stores do not sell "Cock and Balls" dandruff shampoo. It takes about a week of applying Vasoline Intensive Care lotion to overcome this intensive dryness concerning the ballular area. Pubical dandruff has been known to ruin a perfectly good pair of shoes while wearing shorts.
However, shorts do come in convenient while trying to maneuver yourself into the bathroom when the typical female flight attendant wants to join the mile high club with you. Shorts just give off that vibe of "I like to have sex in airplane bathrooms". This is very difficult to accomplish while using normal sized long pants. Airplane bathrooms are small so the smaller size of shorts just provide you with enough acrobatic flexibility to maneuver into the bathroom and into the flight attendant. Hope this little guide helps.
by Stillme FBB on October 11th, 2009
Sure, as long as their not going from Florida to Indiana in Feb. LOL
by RC loves ice cream on October 11th, 2009
Why not?
by Crystal on October 11th, 2009
Yeah,why should clothes matter?
by Thriftymaid on October 11th, 2009
Sure, well, maybe not a speedo
by A Rock In Woolfs Clothing on October 11th, 2009
unless there is something that I don't know outside of coach class, it's too cold so I'm in layers. It might be germaphobic but I wouldn't expose that much of my skin to that seat. Airports are such a public space but I shouldn't talk, I polluted them w/ lots of cigarette smoke & butts before the ban.
by Ironhead on October 12th, 2009
Sure....I have.
by Sharona Life is a Tale Told by an Idiot on October 11th, 2009
As long as they are not short boxer style with no underwear underneath.
by Jack wears love COAT on October 11th, 2009
Well, its their wish. I don't see any wrong in doing that.
by jeanie16 on October 11th, 2009
well, in preference to no clothing................ but seriously, why not?
by Gene H on October 12th, 2009
Men should never wear shorts.
by Gnome of Kevonia is a Cheerwine junkie on October 11th, 2009
It doesn't matter what clothes they wear as long as it's not offensive to those on the plane.
by adamjohn on November 13th, 2010
I see no reason why not, unless they are going to a country offended by shorts.
by Shemarq the Wamama on October 12th, 2009
As long as they don't look like this.
http://www.ebcak.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/bum_shorts.jpg
by raylrodr on October 12th, 2009
No short pants and no flip-flops.
by Tom on October 12th, 2009
I think it is important to dress comfortably for long flights, and if that means wearing shorts, then OK.
by Jacques on October 12th, 2009
London - Malaga flights won't let you board unless you've got shorts on and a beach towel at hand.
by sai2009 on December 20th, 2009
I came back from venice few years ago in adidas short shorts hot in Italy cold in Manchester a bit cold on the plain but did see some cabin crew looking at my legs. will do it again.
Should I be worried about traveling to USA because I look Arabic?
by cariconn on May 4th, 2010
| 3 people like this
What is the longest time you've ever spent waiting in an airport departure lounge?
by PrivateGomerSpooner on January 31st, 2011
| 3 people like this
Have you flown lately, and how is it getting through security? Full body scans and a long time?
Did your baggage arrive with you?
by Baba on May 16th, 2010
| 1 person likes this
What did you eat while you're on the airline?
by XT on May 24th, 2010
| 1 person likes this
How much time do you gain or lose flying to Australia because of the change in time zones?
by crazyjeyesy on May 26th, 2010
| 1 person likes this
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Comments
lmao
by Seeya says Dont Ever Give Up on October 11th, 2009
Can't you just relax? Wear the damned shorts and don't obsess over dry balls or dandruff. It's highly unlikely. Get yourself some bag balm.
by Sharona Life is a Tale Told by an Idiot on October 11th, 2009
Are you talking about Ballm?
by Nutsy_Rail on October 11th, 2009
Am I talking about wha? Bag Balm. Bag Balm. They use it on cow's udders. It stops chafing.
by Sharona Life is a Tale Told by an Idiot on October 12th, 2009
Balm for balls = Ballm
by Nutsy_Rail on October 12th, 2009
And here I am trying to instruct you. You already have the solution. Whew.
by Sharona Life is a Tale Told by an Idiot on October 12th, 2009
hehe no, you brought it to my attention
by Nutsy_Rail on October 12th, 2009
That is friggin' hilarious!!!! I am laughing my ass off right now!!!!
by Shemarq the Wamama on October 12th, 2009
It's amazing what two Answerbaggers can come up with at any given second. LOL.
by Sharona Life is a Tale Told by an Idiot on October 12th, 2009