Why is interracial dating so controversial?

There is a great tendency among people to distrust anything they are unfamiliar with or that appears to be different. This is often expressed as a negative form of tribalism - those people over there are different from and inferior to my people over here. Racial conflict is as old as recorded history itself. And you don't need to belong to different races, either. Hatred is directed to persons who speak different languages, belong to different religions, hold different political beliefs, and belong to different socio-economic classes, among a variety of other excuses. You might say that some people just find it too damn easy to be nasty to one another. A sad commentary on human nature.

In the US, which seems to be where most people on The Answerbag hail from, the dominant conflict is white vs. black. Slavery left a bitter legacy that has not yet been resolved. Until the US works all the ramifications of its slave history out of its system, the black / white conflict will continue.

Still, the world is a less racist place than it was even 50 years ago. Back then we sang "Eenie, meenie, mynie, mo, catch a nigger by the toe" and thought nothing of it. My kids learned to catch tigers. My grandchildren also catch tigers. That's one thing that has improved.

There are many reasons, but most of them track back to people being close-minded and/or bigoted. Many people worry that people of other races are "stealing" potential mates (i.e. To invoke a common stereotype: black men "stealing" white women away from the white men or white women "stealing" black men away from black women), others worry that interracial dating will lead to the dilution of "pure" genes.

In general, when it comes to race, reasons for keeping them separate are rarely rational, and seldom make much sense.

Because there's still bigots in this world. Most of them are old people, while the young generation is becoming more accepting. There some youths who are old fashioned.

I agree with OnyxII, it's not as controversial as it use to be, so we all should be grateful. There was some sensitivity when I recently asked a question regarding why I hardly (pretty much never in the U.S.) see black men dating black women - I didn't think it was such a delicate issue and several people were offended here on answerbag, I guess that counts as controversy? I'm aware that internationally, there are still big taboos with dating someone other than your own race. While I may have been curious about the above mentioned, I am glad to see ANYONE dating exactly who they want to. Again, we have it pretty good in the United States

People living in the stone age that just are prejudice. Sterotypes are a issue with is too. People have their negative views of black, hispanics, whitea, indians, asians and others. Which turn into prejudice and racism. I am in a serious relationship with a hispanic man and I am indian and black. His family has sterotypical views of black people but we don't care because we are in love.

1) "The controversy surrounding interracial dating and marriage has existed for centuries. Most opposition has stemmed from racist ideologies and concerns, such as fear of "racial impurity."

An international issue - South Africa, Canada, Australia and the United States stand out among the list of countries that have formally banned interracial marriage - the debate persists even today. Although now, in 2005, laws against intermarriage no longer exist, opposition remains part of the program of parties such as the British National Party and hate-groups, including the notorious Ku Klux Klan.

In the U.S. the last anti-miscegenation laws were struck down only in 1967 as a result of the now infamous case Loving v. Virginia."
Source and further information:
http://racerelations.about.com/od/racerelationships/a/interracialcoup.htm


2) "For a liberal college campus, some have very conservative views when it comes to dating outside one's race. "Often, interracial couples are questioned as to what individual or ulterior motives are behind their dating. That is, the legitimacy of the relationship - its genuineness and authenticity - is in question until the couple in question proves it," said Arar Han, A&S '04. "Since there really is no standard for what constitutes a legitimate relationship, the couple is often at the whim of public scrutiny until they break up or somehow survive."

"If you are dating someone who isn't your same nationality, you are going to be branded as a sell-out or you are going to put yourself in the situation where your ethnicity is going to be called out and you are going to feel different. There are always people judging you one way or the other... you can't really win," said Hom. Often, attitudes differ according to background, and bi-racial or multi-racial students see less of a problem with interracial relationships than those from single-racial backgrounds. "I don't think that much about dating a white man as those who see us holding hands, but that is probably because I come from a bi-racial background," said Montoya.

In addition to students' backgrounds, to some, a social stigma surrounds dating outside one's race. "There is a popular conception behind interracial couples that a fetish is involved, particularly one toward black men and Asian women," Han said.

Han points to a growing problem on college campuses where the population density is very high: when white women date black men, they take away from black women's dating pools. Because the propensity lies toward dating black men and not black women, black women often shun white women for taking "their men." The same holds true for Asian women. When white men date Asian women, they take away from the Asian men whom white women do not find attractive.."

"This complication stirs racial competition. "In this manner interracial couples stir controversy," said Han. "Sometimes people think they date just so they can say they dated someone from a particular race." "
Source and further information:
http://www.bcheights.com/home/index.cfm?event=displayArticlePrinterFriendly&uStory_id=cbc85110-742a-42cb-9f7e-84196de6d467

Further information:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interracial_dating

Some people will always have a negative sterotype about a race without even knowing the person
Some just fear what they dont understand

Interacial relationships are nasty and and difficult and are not as accepted as you are trying to make them out to be. Interacial marriage's make up less than 1% of all the marriage's in the U.S. I am the Father of a daughter that had a interriacial baby and she finally came around and realized that it was wrong and now she is doing great and is very successful. She realized how hard it was to never have any real friends and that everyone looked down on her.

If your Single then its not really a problem, but now days so many Married White Women are dating Black guys, unfortunately once they get into the dating game, they relive all their youth and do not want to return to the constraints of married life.

None of they will want to break up their marriage, which is their security, but dating again brings the Wow back into their lives.

2nd Kings 5, Leviticus 13-15, and Numbers 12

I'm white and my s/o is black.We dont pay any attention to the ignorant,unless they push it.Then its my turn to push back.Interracial couples will always be controversial to those who have racist minds.In the famous words of Forrest Gump,"Stupid is as stupid does".

It isn't?

I've honestly -never- heard anyone who has a problem with it...

Except in movies that is, so no doubt the mind set exists somewhere, but I've never witnessed it in real life thankfully.

I imagine it happens due to very old racist or otherwise bigoted ideas put into people during their early childhood that make them believe there is some tangible difference between people of one 'race' and another 'race', despite the proof (genetic and otherwise) that we now have that there is no such thing as 'race' within Humanity.

Old mind sets, and sorry to say this but I really think racism is partly the way we were raised. So it will take a few generations to get it completely out of society. Just as an example not to talk back but my grandmother has said a few things like she was not thinking it just came out. I know she is not bad but from what I heard my great grandma was. Now I am the 4th gen and lol have a girlfriend that I love who is black so ;D all is well at least with my part.

I am Desi as Bengali from Bangladesh. I love black ladies. But in NY City sometimes it is hard to approach because of their racial preference in men. Some are gold-digger, stuck up, picky, and....like private part size!! Why don't they think of human nature of showing love, caring, respect and feeling toward interracial?? They should open up their mind as this is 2006 and soon 2007! Come on, black ladies....

Maybe It's because there are lots of guys of certain race who only date a woman of a different race based on a sexual fetish, or comment such as:

black women like to shake their ass and grind poles
white women are dumb and slutty.
latinas are easy, and fast.
Asian women are submissive, and obedient.
French women are premiscous.

You should never let a woman feel like she is just a sexual object because of the race or nationality she is.

With whom? If you're involved, do you consider it controversial? If so, does the controversy bother you? If not, then why bother about the concerns of others? You can find controversy about almost anything. Many of our reactions to controversy depend on who is raising the issue. If we could learn to not worry about others, we would eliminate controversy in our lives.

It depends upon the individuals involved and their families and cultures.

Unfortunately, people who are NOT supposed to be involved also come into play with their judgments. These are the people who have nothing to do directly with the couple, their family, or any of the dynamics of such.

Many cultures, like mine, do not approve of interracial dating. In my culture, laying with the Gadje (non-Rromani of any ethnicity) is traditionally justification to be expelled from your Clan (one of the hugest of the marime Romaniya). There are old, and very real, reasons for this Law (Romaniya is "Rromani Law"), most moot today in countries like America. This is, luckily, changing in many places, America included. It is even changing in EU to a degree.

There are many degrees of disapproval from various cultures, from the extreme of mine (traditional... again, this is passing) to not being bothered about it.

Then there is the just plain ol' racism factor. I can understand cultural taboos against it but the racism has NO logical reason other than ignorance and hatred.

It is up to the individuals involved to decide if they want to take the heat from lookyloos, their family, and their friends.

I do not have any problem with interracial dating. As everyone knows, I am polyamorous. I am in a relationship with three people and all of them are Gadje.

Children of interracial marriages can face some problems. I have faced some problems with the "I am more Rrom than you" crowd because I am 3/4 blooded. However, the rest of the Rromani (including most of the pure bloods) jump in in my defense and shout down the "I am more Rrom than you" crowd.

I am certain that this happens in all such situations. It is stupid, frankly.

B/C black men were always hung shot or beaten back in the 1800's and the early part of the 1900's when they would look at a white girl. I wouldent really date outside of my race. Besides alot of black girls say that there arnt enough black men out there because they always have to share them with white girls.

There are many interracial dating service online, you can have a try for interracial relationship. I suggest www.interracialfriends.com. Like any of the dating services, you can set your search to include only asian women. There are MANY asian women on this website, as well as other ethnicities.

I don't think it is as controversial as it used to be. I am 44 years old and things have changed considerably in my time. I think the world is starting to grow up.
I believe the ignorance of a few will be with us always, but it will never be like it was in the past.

people check out my blog :) i just started it and i hope to get some feedback and expand it :)

i hope my stories and opinions can help others in the same situation.

http://realromeoandjuliet.blogspot.com/