ANSWERS: 7
  • How old are you? You are responsible for your own happiness. If you are an adult and you think you will be happier it you elope, do it.
  • I know from your point of view, it'd be easier to tell them afterward. They can't do anything about it once it's done, right? You have no idea how hurt they will be if that's how you did it. You have no idea how regretful you might be in the future knowing you didn't allow them to be there. I'm not saying it will be easy, but please give them the opportunity to be there, even if they don't approve.
  • i as a parent i would be extremely disappointed if that happened. but i have always supported and accepted my children's (grown now) decisions. by the time they are grown and on their own, a parent can only hope they raised them right. if asked i give advise if not i don't. sounds like your parents would greatly interfere with your decision. you might ask yourself though to look at your situation if you were a parent. is there a good reason why they are like that, or are they just controlling. your relation with your parents and husband will be rocky. good luck.
  • Difficult one but ultimately it is your day to be held however you wish. I would be hurt, disappointed and a bit confused if either of my children told me they were married after the event. It is one thing to accept that their idea of their wedding day might not include the family but to be told they already got married is something else. If you value your relationship with your parents I would suggest telling them that nothing is planned yet but when you get married it isn't going to be the traditional wedding they might have envisaged you having. Give them the chance to react to your wishes and then when the time comes you can let them know that you have planned your wedding and are going to get married on X date. Maybe you could also have a small blessing or just a family party that they can be involved in afterwards.... The worst thing you can do is not tell them - keep the lines of communication open even if they don't like what they hear.
  • My daughter met this man over the internet. he flew in and they sold her house and one vehicle. rented a U-Haul and headed for Seattle. On the way, they stopped in Las Vegas and got married. Shock is not the word to describe how her mother and i felt. She would not tell us this persons name and for all we knew, he was the Green River killer. Marriage lasted about 8 months and now divorced. Was this fair to her parents? No. We have not talked to each other for two years. the other day, the silence was broken and all is okay now between us. Point being, if you want to lose your parents, marry in silence. your parents raised you and they deserve to be in on your marriage. Before the marriage, not after.
  • A cousin of mine married and didnt tell anyone for 2 years! when we all found out we were hurt, her parents and grandparents were so upset and disappointed that she had done this We all like him, hes a lovely guy, her wedding pics are so lonely and look so sad we still dont understand why she didnt tell us. tell your parents! if they dont like it they will come round but not telling them will hurt them alot
  • Well, how do your fiance's (or boyfriend, whichever) parents feel about him getting married? If they are all for it, then you both owe it to them to have a decent wedding. Which would also mean inviting YOUR parents as well. Who cares if they don't want you to get married! It's your life! And if neither party is happy with the idea of marriage, well, Gretna Green here you come! :)

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