Don't WASH the CAT! Unless the cat has a physical problem, it will clean itself. Also, it will Traumatize the CAT. Soap will remove the protectant film on the fur that protects the cat from parasites. Some cats like water more than others. a small wading pool for toddlers "may" tempt a curious cat.

Some cats benefit from an occasional bath; the first line of defense in keeping cats clean is to brush them regularly, at least once a week and more often if its fur tends to form mats. Cats aren't normally dirty animals and most cats can go their whole life without ever needing a bath with the proper care. If your cat smells bad, has excessive dandruff, greasy fur, or bites and scratches at itself, it might be a symptom of an underlying illness. If you cat seems to lack energy (even if it's old), drinks alot, changes in litterbox habits or the amount of urine it produces, soft stool, has a change in appetite or has lost weight in the last year, you should see your vet before proceeding to try to clean him up. Some cats are so obese they are incapable of keeping themselves groomed (they can't reach); in this case, consult with your vet on the best way to help your cat lose weight. There are many tasty foods available. Until kitty is able to do it itself you should bathe it at least partially once a week (butt bath). Follow you vet's directions if skin has problems because of feces and urine scald. Now that I've told you more than you ever wanted to know about how cats get dirty, here's how you give them a bath: Brush fur thouroughly first and remove any mats (brush out or clip out with clipper - work clipper gently under the mat until it is lifted off. Use a #10 blade. Avoid using a scissors as cats skin is very thin and can be impossible to see under a mat; even pro groomers occ. cut cats this way. I should know, I've helped stitch up such accidents many times, and one time I did it! Use the mildest pet shampoo you can find. Puppy shampoo or hypoallergenic is good. dilute the shampoo in a squirt bottle 50/50. put a towel in the bottom of a large sink such as a laundry sink so kitty won't slip and get scared. make sure the drain stays open. Go slowly; try to keep it a soothing experience. Only use lukewarm water to wet and rinse. don't get its head wet. Massage the soap in gently, using as little as you can. Rinse thouroughly. The least little bit of soap will make it very itchy. Dry gently but thouroughly with a big towel and keep it in a warm place til dry; then brush fur out again. Have patience; go slow; remember jumping out of the tub a dozen times on its first dozen baths is normal behavior - don't get mad!

It can help to have two people to do the job, one to do the washing and one to hold the kitty. You can gently hold the front and back paws without squeezing, so the cat can't get away or scratch you. You only need a very shallow bit of water, and you can lightly splash to get the cat wet rather than submerging. Usually this is more comfortable to them than being in deep water. Cats don't need baths like dogs do, but if you find it necessary to give your cat a bath, it's best to only do it once a year or if the cat gets really dirty (from being outside, under the house, etc), and to start when the cat is young. If you have just started with an older cat, it should get used to it if you try to make it a soothing experience. Don't make the cat feel like you are trying to drown him. When you are done, wrap kitty in a towel (loosely), hold him for awhile and make sure he is warm and relaxed. That will help it to be less of a traumatic experience.

Cats clean themselves. They obviously don't like water. ;) They are very clean animals, if they are in water of course they are going to freak. :)

Cats don't like water, if you put them in water of course they are going to freak. In my opinion cats are clean and can take care of that themselves.

If you are allergic to cats, then washing them once a month and getting all your carpets and such changed will give you immunity after the forth month (four washes). Otherwise washing for the sake of washing is not required but if it is important for reasons that I do not know, then get a breed that likes water so much that it will go and take a bath if it is drawn, "Abyssinian" is the breed you would enjoy giving a bath, almost as much as the cat. I see that my source would be helpful since this is not a mainstream answer. TIME magazine: Allergies Nothing to Sneeze At Monday, Jun. 22, 1992

Well cats dont need bathes usaully because they clean them selves but all you have to do is hold the cat down with one hand.if that doesnt work ask someone else to hold the cat while you wash it.the cat will try to get away of course.watch out if the cat has claws.it may scratch you.afterwards if the cat will let you you can blow try the cat on low.its easyier to just hold the cat in a towel for a while.before you you wrap it up in a towel lightly rub the cats body with the towel.when the cat is dry you can let it down.if you dont make sure the cat is warm it will become very cold.your cat may have no contact with for a while but if that occurs just give your cat some time itll come around.

Another method you can try is to put the cat in the tub with you, then give it a shower. This way, the cat doesn't have to stand in any depth of water, which many cats don't enjoy. This only works if you have a detachable shower head though, or one of those hoses with a shower that you can attach to the faucet. If the shower head is left up, the noise and splashing will probably freak the cat out. But if you put the shower head down, it's less noisy and the cat can move to the far side of the tub to escape the running water while you're shampooing. Also, try not to spray the cat with shower too much, especially around it's head. It may work better to use your hand to direct the flow of the water onto the cat so it is more gentle. I've used this method on my own cat--he peed in his carrier on the way home from the vet, and it got all over him. He really does not like water generally, but he tolerated this method quite well. By the way, some cats do enjoy water. One of my other cats loves to curl up in the sink and let the water from the faucet run all over her!

You can also buy new cat bath wipes like baby wipes that are good for cleaning off plain dirt but they dont work on oily things so well.

1. Lift the lid on the toilet and pour in 1/8 cup of animal shampoo. 2. Take the cat in your arms and stroke it gently while slowly moving in the direction of the toilet. 3. At a suitable moment, throw the cat into the toilet bowl and close the lid quickly and either stand or sit on the lid. 4. The cat will now start the cleaning process and will produce generate plenty of foam. Do not be concerned about the loud noises coming from the toilet; your cat is enjoying himself. 5. After several minutes flush the toilet to start the “Power-wash” pre-wash and then flush again for the main wash cycle. 6. Ask someone to open the front door and ensure that no-one is between the toilet and the front door. 7. Get off the toilet seat and from a safe distance open the toilet lid quickly. The cat will dry off naturally due to the high speed he will be moving from the toilet to the front door. 8. The toilet and the cat are now both clean.

Does he really need to be washed? If you have noticed, cats are very good at cleaning themselves. There is nothing you can do to make them like it. They will meow, scratch, and even shit. Yeah I said it shit. Cats will crap when nervous or stressed.

They make a mesh bag that the cats body goes into. You can get it at petedge.com.

Here's an interesting video on washing a cat. I should note that I used to have about 4 cats and I wish I had this tutorial. I would have less scars.

With difficulty. but i can tell you they don't like it

waterless shampoo at Walmart check health issues and the cats diet first. If you are not feeding it a good food, it will not have good skin and hair.

As stated in many other answers, always check with your vet first. Most cats should be able to keep themselves, and the inability to do so is often a sign that something is wrong. Washing a cat can cause numerous skin problems, as well, so it should be done only when absolutely necessary. While normal washing can be done with a good cat shampoo, and probably with a little help from someone else, the best way is often to use waterless solutions. These are much gentler on the cat's skin and fur, as well as much easier to use. They are often just a powder that is brushed through the fur, and most pet shops will carry some of them.

Don't wash the cat. Cat's are self-cleaning. Unless he's been hit by a skunk, leave kitty be.. If he's horribly stinky just take a scented baby wipe to him. Hold him gently by the scruff of his neck and give him the once over as if you were a momma cat. He may avoid you for a few hours but he'll forgive and forget quicker than if you bathed the poor sucker.

Two people. A sink,dry. Warm water and soap set aside in a dish. Several hot/warm wet towels. At least two dry towels hot from the dryer. Apply in logical order. At least, this is what we did when our cat came home covered in poison.

Alright. This is a difficult task but one that you can overcome by yourself. Self-cleaning? If you have Paw prints then likely no. First you need:A helmet that covers your face, netting won't do as your cat can probably tear this to shreds with you in them. A protective suit, say untearable or tough material, A shower/bath with a hard covering, shower curtains are no good. shreds like netting. Gloves with grip are also needed.+ all ingredients to wash your cat. Put on the protective clothing and be sure to be covered head to toe. Protect long hair if needed. Now comes the hard part. Pick up your cat non chalantly as if to take it to its food bowl. most likely they won't notice your strange attire. Then when near the bath room, In one quick sweep you have to close the door, get in the shower, close the shower door and sit on the floor with the water going. Spray him with the soapand get a quick lathering. Never expect to be able to hold on to him for more than two latherings. This is extremely difficult even without the soap. when you think he is clean spray him with water. Get out of the shower and dry the now permanently-attatched-to-your-leg cat. If he/she clings on to your helmet or back, best thing you can do is encourage him/her to your leg. Once he/she relaxes enough to be removed from your leg, don't try and assess the cats feelings. Even though it may develop a fixed stare at you, It does not hate you. It is simply finding a way to get through the protective gear and injure you for life. But at least he smells a lot better.

all i do is hold them by the scruff of the neck get a cup and put the shampoo in the water in the cup hold them standing up in the (empty) bath and wash they dont feel so threatened when their feet are not submerged, and make sure you talk to them to calm then down and keep it quick.!!

cats can take a small sliver of valium, and they are GREAT in the bath.

with a firehose

Have the phone near by, some first aid, 10 or so band aids, ID on or near you, and a camera, place the cat in the water, at first he/she will squirm, meow, growl, hiss, all that good stuff, then maybe calm down, as you are washing it, thinking everything is OK, it has calmed down, it will come out of shock, give you the finger, scratch the heck out of you and run over ever thing that is important to you soaking it of course, then run under your bed, getting the last laugh of course! If blood won't clot, use the phone call 911 and make sure your ID is near or on you, but use the towel first to blot, apply first aid then the band aid, call a fried give them a good laugh, take a picture of you so if this really dumb idea ever overcomes you again, you are reminded why it is extremely stupid!

Try keeping one pair of legs out of the water. I found that this works about half the time. We have 4 cats in the house and it works on 3 of ours.

Carefully, very carefully!!!

I bathe my fat & very long haired cat exactly as she stated, the only difference I do is I have a double sink in my utility room and I put a thick towel on the bar between the sinks so that my kitty can lean on that and not feel like he isn't in control of the situation or that he will fall. I also like to keep his "tail feathers" real short. My other 4 just sit and watch while I am bathing him.

Tranquilize the cat, then give it a bath.

First you need to put on some armor, chainmail at the very least..................

Do you mean "wash a cat"? Maybe first go to a pet store and see if there are any soaps or shampoos for cats and ask the staff about the best way to do it.

In very heavey protective clothing and goggles. And make sure to keep the peroxide and at least one turnoquit on hand as well.

Really, it isn't too hard. Having standing water is best, so as not to spook your kitty. Don't use human shampoo as this will hurt your kitty's fur and skin by making it dry and flaky. If you need to restrain your kitty, you can use a soft cloth belt. Over her neck on one side and behind her shoulder on the other. This will not harm your cat and will restrain her safely. If you only have a shower head to work with-turn the water on and put the shower as close to the skin as possible. This will keep all the dander and soap running off, but not put fear as much in your kitty. Do NOT spray her face! If the face needs washed, use a wet cloth. Do NOT get water inside of her ears. This can cause infection and bacterial growth. Use Q-tips to clean the ears out. Hope this helps, good luck.

With care

Like so:

cats clean them selves when they like thir fur when they do that they lick right down 2 the root and it cleans them , the best way 2 clean ur cat is 2 let it clean it self im a cat breeder so i know this

give your cat an injenction that makes it faint then wash it

Don't. They are self-cleaning.

Put them in the Cat Washing Machine

Hold him tightly by the scruff of the neck. Hold him under warm running water, being careful to avoid the face.

Similar to one of the other answers: I. Know that although the cat has the advantage of quickness and lack of concern for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalize on that advantage by selecting the battlefield. Don't try to bathe him in an open area where he can force you to chase him. Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than four feet square, I recommend that you get in the tub with the cat and close the sliding -glass doors as if you were about to take a shower. (A simple shower curtain will not do. A berserk cat can shred a three-ply rubber shower curtain quicker than a politician can shift positions.) II. Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body. Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. I recommend canvas overalls tucked into high-top construction boots, a pair of steel-mesh gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face-mask, and a long-sleeved flak jacket. III. Use the element of surprise. Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if to simply carry him to his supper dish. (Cats will not usually notice your strange attire. They have little or no interest in fashion as a rule.) IV. . Once you are inside the bathroom, speed is essential to survival. In a single liquid motion, shut the bathroom door, step into the tub enclosure, slide the glass door shut, dip the cat in the water and squirt him with shampoo. You have begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life. V. Cats have no handles. Add the fact that he now has soapy fur, and the problem is radically compounded. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time. When you have him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy. He'll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself off. (The national record for cats is three latherings, so don't expect too much.) IV. Next, the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part will be the most difficult, for humans generally are worn out at this point and the cat is just getting really determined. In fact, the drying is simple compared with what you have just been through. That's because by now the cat is semi-permanently affixed to your right leg. You simply pop the drain plug with your foot, reach for your towel and wait. (Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing you can do is to shake him loose and to encourage him toward your leg.) After all the water is drained from the tub, it is a simple matter to just reach down and dry the cat. In a few days the cat will relax enough to be removed from your leg. He will usually have nothing to say for about three weeks and will spend a lot of time sitting with his back to you. He might even become psychoceramic and develop the fixed stare of a plaster figurine. You will be tempted to assume he is angry. This isn't usually the case. As a rule he is simply plotting ways to get through your defenses and injure you for life the next time you decide to give him a bath.

Every once in a while, one of our cats will get pretty stinky (especially the ones who hate riding in the carrier to the vet and poop all over the carrier...) and we need to bathe them. Thankfully, there are 2 of us, and one will hold the cat while the other bathes...as quickly as possible, with the door closed, and a thick, fluffy towel to dry them off really good when we're done.

I have 2 long hair cats that from time to time need to be cleaned. I use my 2 sided wash tub in the basement. I fill a few (I use like 8 small ones) buckets with warm water. I mix a fair amount of cat/dog shampoo with water in a dish soap squeezie bottle. I put a harness on the cat, and use the strap that is between neck band and band around the front legs. Then I put the cat into one side of the sink and use some bucket water to get the cat wet, then use the squeeze bottle to put on the soap/water mix. I wash the cat well and then rinse clean with the remaining buckets of water. Neither cat is happy with this, one hisses, one moans. They try like heck to get away, but I have never been bit or scratched(knock wood). They are a little pissed at me, but get over as soon as treats are handed out. Thank god I only have to do this about every 6 to 9 monthes.

Take one bath towel. Wrap towel around cats throat like a salon cape. Hold towel with one hand at back of cat's neck. Place cat and towel in pre filled deep sink. Towel should drape in front and underneath cat's paws, giving cat something to hang onto and not slip around sink. If you proceed calmly with a sink hose or cup, you can wet the cat and apply soap, lather and rinse with your other hand. A firm grip on the towel will keep cat from being able to raise cat's paws out from around towel. Two people can more easily do this, with one holding and the other doing all the washing and rinsing. A second towel or two will be necessary for the drying process. Mostly wrap and hold cat in lap until water soaks into towel. A warm room with a loving owner's grooming brush applied to cat's favorite spots under chin and behind ears can be a sweet bonding experience. If cat does not favor the grooming attention, allow cat to dry unmolested in warm room. In a small bathroom, I had one cat that enjoyed the warm air of the hair dryer without minding the noise. My cat was older when I tried the hair dryer, so it may have been after some age related hearing loss. I sat on the closed toilet seat and flicked the dryer back and forth, aiming mostly toward the back and sides of the cat while the cat walked around the bathroom, providing it's own back and forth pacing at my legs for good coverage.