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by galaxy on March 4th, 2007

galaxy

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Why is the divorce rate so high in US, even when most couples know each other for a few yrs before getting married?

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Answers. 36 helpful answers below.

  • by RFlagg on March 4th, 2007

    RFlagg

    Reckless marriages.

    People getting married when they're not ready because they think of it as just "What you do".
    And people who won't live together first because they think that's "Not What you do".

    Marriage is taken way too lightly in this country, the world over, in fact.
    And I think that it either needs to be redefined or abolished completely, because the common idea of what marriage is is extremely off base.

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  • by Lucky67 on November 13th, 2009

    Lucky67

    Most of the people think that because of FREEDOM, they can do whatever they wanted to do, that's why. They didn't think that FREEDOM means responsibilities.

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  • by Anonymous on March 4th, 2007

    Anonymous

    Because we live in a disposable society - we also are a generation of 'instant gratification' - so when times get rough people don't have the same level of committment as generations past had. It's not that our grandparents generation didn't face a lot of the same issues as couples do nowadays - and many will tell you when asked - there were many rough patches within the lifetime of their marriage - but they stuck it out and rode them out together and came out of them with an even stronger bond and greater appreciation for the other person.

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  • by Ren on September 19th, 2009

    Ren

    Because people like change. They get bored with the same thing for too long so they just toss it aside and find something else. Not the best option when marriage is involved, and the decision will probably be regretted, but that's how things are these days, sadly enough.

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  • by Boka on September 17th, 2009

    Boka

    I think the answer is very simple:

    1. Since ages men have always been dominating and its because of the women (since they were dependent or just loved their husband or whatever) the marriage survived.

    2. Current scenario, men are more or less the same. However, most women have changed and more or less become like men. Thats how now-a-days most parents bring up their girl. Both men and women are trying to dominate each other. Now we all see the end results.

    I am not against the progress of women. But I would like to see a women progess by staying women and not becoming a men. Most men are stupid and women can easily keep them under control not by fighting with them but by using her feminine skills :)

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  • by Darling on March 19th, 2009

    Darling

    Because they give up too easy.

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  • by gingerbread on March 19th, 2009

    gingerbread

    Because of AIDS

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  • by gibbypoo on February 25th, 2009

    gibbypoo

    Because it's an acceptable option by the standards of this country, just like homosexuality. I wonder the percentage of gays in other parts of the world and I can guesstimate that it's nowhere near the current U.S.-levels. Not saying it's wrong but it's as taboo as is divorce around the world.

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  • by DeadBlix on February 25th, 2009

    DeadBlix

    Because most people have issues dealing with conflict so they just let things fall apart instead of working for a better relationship.

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  • by anddeb on February 25th, 2009

    anddeb

    cheaters, one of the partners starts taking extras and ends up cheating and whoops thers goes another one.

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  • by engineer is Terminator on March 4th, 2007

    engineer is Terminator

    Knowing each other few years before marriage cant help here . only knowing one another few years after helps . Every thing depends on post marrital understanding.

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  • by FLYxNIGHT on March 4th, 2007

    FLYxNIGHT

    Because Americans are selfish and annoying, to the point where we even get on one another's nerves.

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  • by invisible0007 on September 19th, 2009

    invisible0007

    Simple- Most people like to change others but themselves. In a relationship it takes two to tango. One may lead and other follow, sometimes in a special move the other take lead and so dance progress into more and more complex moves to keep thing interesting and hot. Well most couples may tango for awhile then when things get mundane and boring. They start to blame each other and demand changes but are unable or find it too stressful to make an effort to improve on themselves. So the curtain closes and The End.

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  • by George R. McCasland on September 19th, 2009

    George R. McCasland

    http://tinyurl.com/RightAgeToMarry-2
    http://tinyurl.com/ShouldWeLiveTogether-StanfordU

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  • by Boka on September 17th, 2009

    Boka

    I think the answer is very simple:

    1. Since ages men have always been dominating and its because of the women (since they were dependent or just loved their husband or whatever) the marriage survived.

    2. Current scenario, men are more or less the same. However, most women have changed and more or less become like men. Thats how now-a-days most parents bring up their girl. Both men and women are trying to dominate each other. Now we all see the end results.

    I am not against the progress of women. But I would like to see a women progess by staying women and not becoming a men. Most men are stupid and women can easily keep them under control not by fighting with them but by using her feminine skills :)

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  • by alfugazi on March 19th, 2009

    alfugazi

    I have been to weddings of friends of mine and I have actually taken a bet on how long some of those marriages will last. Sadly many dont. The good thing is though, I won $50. hahahahaha....in all seriousness though, I dont think people grasp the concept of till death do us part. In some circumstances, the vows should read..."till I get caught cheating" or something along those lines. Sad how people know what they are marrying and think they can change them. This one friend of mine actually married a stripper. I rolled my eyes when he told me. Im like "dude your 40-something and its just such a terrible cliche". Needless to say they are now in divorce proceedings.

    I think I discovered a line form the Eagles that sums it up what men really want..."I've been search for the daughter of the devil himslef, I've been searching for an angel in white"

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  • by nickfromspace on March 19th, 2009

    nickfromspace

    Because humans are hipocrites, they always think selfishly, you have to understand that when you get married partners grow and change together, your 20 year old doll you married will not be the same at 38, but if in love and have a bit of common sense about human evolution this should be enough to stick together forever. You have to control your urges and act like a human not like an animal, hence the difference and controlling urges, men I know have to fool around to prove they are still men... Spend that energy with your woman and you will have no problems in the marriage dept... anyways there are so many reasons books have been written about this stuff but I never had to read one, I have sense to to cheat on my wife with any of my exes, etc etc etc, therefore marriage will last as it has.... Good luck.

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  • by themyelinsheath on February 25th, 2009

    themyelinsheath

    Marriage used to have a function, the man had his job and the woman had hers. It's becom.ing absolete. Love changes, it doesn't stay like the movies for most, reality sets in and they wonder why they're in the position they are in. The answer is that none of us know what we're getting into.

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  • by Rebelheart on February 25th, 2009

    Rebelheart

    I think it is because society has devalued marriage and parenthood. People, women in particularily, are given unrealistic expectations regarding what to expect in a marriage. Lots of folks think it should be like on TV, when everyone is perfect, employed, houses stay cleaned up, and no one has to do the dishes. Sadly, when Dr. Reality pays his visit, some are so disillusioned that their first impulse is to cut and run.

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  • by guitar_player2009 on February 25th, 2009

    guitar_player2009

    Because marriage changes things and people become bitter and ugly.

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  • by niki210 on February 25th, 2009

    niki210

    yeah they know each other but they don't know anything ABOUT each other.

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  • by Nod.Coltsfan on February 25th, 2009

    Nod.Coltsfan

    Because it is so easy to get a divorce in America and there is no punishment. People had horrible marriages 100 years ago, but they stuck it out because that was their religious belief. This is no longer the case.

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  • by Zimary on February 25th, 2009

    Zimary

    I don't know, but my guess is that its because there IS divorce. Instead of making people sit down and work things out, they know heres an easy way out and take it. Back when divorce was frowned upon, people knew it could ruin their lives so they were forced to work out their problems. Now, its all "lets just get this over with".

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  • by Rabbit on February 25th, 2009

    Rabbit

    People, feelings, and situations change. People are not committed; we no longer feel like we have to stay with a person no matter what, which is for the best in some relationships. Often, it is just easier to give up and walk away than it is to fight to keep a marriage together. I cannot say I haven't thought about saying "screw it," and I actually love my husband.

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  • by sbantone on February 25th, 2009

    sbantone

    No matter how long you know a person before getting married, there will most likely be unforseen conflicts that arise when forced to share certain things with them - a home, finances, children, and other responsibilities. Sometimes people feel so strongly about their position that they would not be able to compromise without feeling trapped or resentful, so they find it is better to end the relationship and move on. I don't believe divorce is problematic. I think it's healthier to live an honest life and only stay in a realtionship that is actually working.

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  • by denise on April 27th, 2007

    denise

    Perhaps it's just as simple as people falling out of love and moving on - years ago society frowned on divorce so people stayed in unhappy marraiges, now it's acceptable, so people seperate and look for love elsewhere. I'm not condoning Divorce, just commenting.

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  • by judgebill on April 26th, 2007

    judgebill

    The divorce rate is similar in the entire western world. Europe and Canada and South America all have the similar divorce rates. What is often overlooked is that marriage is simply another form of relationship. All relationships respond to the same statistics...that is, over 63% of them break up. Friendships and marriages last about as long. Think about it.

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  • by Jeffers on April 27th, 2007

    Jeffers

    We're hypocrits... we have politicized "family values" as a conservative response to the notion of gay marriage, but we have done absolutely nothing to support heterosexual marriage.

    I think people get married too young and for the wrong reasons. It made sense, 100 years ago, to get married at 18, because people were prepared to be independent adults at 18... now people barely move out of their parents house by the time they're 25... and are still very immature socially.

    We also tend to obsess on sex and many folks marry because they're too horny and cannot find guilt-free, responsible relief without marriage. Typically, after their first divorce, folks no longer have that problem... (this is based on broad anecdotal information... I'm too tired to google and find a study to support my opinion.)

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  • by Gene H on February 25th, 2009

    Gene H

    You say that like it's a bad thing. Look, for centuries people were stuck with the decision to get married even when it was the families' idea and not there's. Hollywood and romantic poetry has taught people damn lies about love and fidelity. Now, people of both sexes are actively seeking happiness. The divorce rate is pretty low, when you look at it that way.

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  • by Anon on February 25th, 2009

    Anon

    People are idiots of whom get married for the hell of it.

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  • by Lori K still ignores stalkers and trolls on February 25th, 2009

    Lori K still ignores stalkers and trolls

    Because it's relatively easy to get a divorce, relatively cheap and socially acceptable. The divorce rates, by country, follow:

    #1 United States: 4.95 per 1,000 people
    #2 Puerto Rico: 4.47 per 1,000 people
    #3 Russia: 3.36 per 1,000 people
    #4 United Kingdom: 3.08 per 1,000 people
    #5 Denmark: 2.81 per 1,000 people
    #6 New Zealand: 2.63 per 1,000 people
    #7 Australia: 2.52 per 1,000 people
    #8 Canada: 2.46 per 1,000 people
    #9 Finland: 1.85 per 1,000 people
    #10 Barbados: 1.21 per 1,000 people
    #11 Guadeloupe: 1.18 per 1,000 people
    #12 Qatar: 0.97 per 1,000 people
    #13 Portugal: 0.88 per 1,000 people
    #14 Albania: 0.83 per 1,000 people
    #15 Tunisia: 0.82 per 1,000 people
    #16 Singapore: 0.8 per 1,000 people
    #17 China: 0.79 per 1,000 people
    #18 Greece: 0.76 per 1,000 people
    #19 Brunei: 0.72 per 1,000 people
    #20 Panama: 0.68 per 1,000 people
    #21 Syria: 0.65 per 1,000 people
    #22 Thailand: 0.58 per 1,000 people
    #23 Mauritius: 0.47 per 1,000 people
    #24 Ecuador: 0.42 per 1,000 people
    #25 El Salvador: 0.41 per 1,000 people
    #26 Cyprus: 0.39 per 1,000 people
    #27 Chile: 0.38 per 1,000 people
    #28 Jamaica: 0.38 per 1,000 people
    #29 Mongolia: 0.37 per 1,000 people
    #30 Turkey: 0.37 per 1,000 people
    #31 Mexico: 0.33 per 1,000 people
    #32 Italy: 0.27 per 1,000 people
    #33 Brazil: 0.26 per 1,000 people
    #34 Sri Lanka: 0.15 per 1,000 people

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  • by 34th st. on February 25th, 2009

    34th st.

    you got me. How hard is it to figure out whether or not you might want to kill this person at some unspecified date in the immediate/long term future? Gosh, these young people today, they have it so easy!

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  • by Mirage V2.0 AWOL on April 26th, 2007

    Mirage V2.0 AWOL

    Many marriages last for years.
    Many people who divorce once, don't know how to form lasting relationships.

    This group often marries four or five times, thus driving up divorce statistics, while the old, faithful married couple above has not impacted it yet!

    People expect too much from marriage. They expect a perfect partner, easy finances, and all their dreams fulfilled. These high expectations doom a relationship unless they are made more realistic.

    Alcoholism, drugs, infidelity and stress also end many marriages.

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  • by LustxOverxLove on November 14th, 2009

    LustxOverxLove

    We are a disposable society.
    If we want something new, we'll get rid of our old thing.

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  • by happiness on November 14th, 2009

    happiness

    Free sex practise, co-habit, internet, alcohol, drugs, etc etc.

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  • by walter3ca on February 25th, 2009

    walter3ca

    People were not designed to live with another person for long periods of time. Love fades. Obnoxiousness grows.

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