ANSWERS: 100
  • Yes, I guess they have...but I haven't. It would still be NO.
  • For her sake you just have to say no. Excuse me, I meant, "NO"!
  • Maybe, but I'd sure hope not. Stick to your guns, you are a good parent doing a good thing. FYI - soon she'll try to be sneaky and do it anyways.
  • Times have changed. Don't change your answer.
  • The way we handle these kinds of situations is we say that if your friends are doing it that is there business. In our house we don't let 14 yr old girls sleep at their boyfriend's house. Then we stick to those rules. My 17 yr old step-son wanted to t.p. someone's house for homecoming. All his friends were doing it and they had permission from the person whose house it was. But, it is illegal to t.p. someone's house where we live. So, we told him that we do not intentionally break the law in our house and that he could not do it. He was o.k. with it after awhile and he had fun doing the other legal things for homecoming.
  • They have for sure! look at what teens are wearing these days, mini skirts and more revealing clothing. She is obviously being peer pressured and does'nt wanna be left out of this bunch of so called cool people. She is young and does not know any better. Stick to your answer, and keep it a no. Becareful though, check up on her regularly, as she might sneak out, don't leave her for one night. EDIT: Make sure she isn't skipping school to go with this boyfriend.
  • I seriously doubt that all of her friends are sleeping at their BFs houses. What would that say about the state of parenting these days. All I can say is the watch the action when I require that every suitor or bF come and meet their dates old man. Sorry but our daughter won't be sleeping anywhere but HER own house until she's in college. Just can't trust people these days.
  • I don't care what time it is. Don't let her do this. And if she keeps asking I'd stop letting her date. But that's just me. Quite frankly I think she's feeding you a line. I know nobody who lets their kids have their boy/girlfriends spend the night. Unless they want to be grandparents before they're 40. Just keep standing your ground on this one. You're doing the right thing by protecting her.
  • Times are always changing, Keep to your guns. It is great to see that there are parents out there that still care for their children. Don't give in to her in this matter. Just because her friends were to go and jump off a cliff, does not mean that she should be allowed to join them.
  • It doesn't matter what other people are doing. Worry about your daughter. These days lots of 14 year olds are pregnant now because "everyone is doing it"
  • From an 18 yr olds point of view... no times have not changed THAT much. Don't stop saying no.
  • Yes. Time have changed. Parents need to understand that! I get sick of hearing .. "back when i was a kid".. I hate that. Its not your times anymore. Look at the things we have now.. look how much better it is. Times have changed. Kids dont act like you all did when you were kids. I would say yes.. But it would depend on where she was sleeping. I'd also contact the boys parents and see if this is okay. I stayed the night with my boyfriend when i was 15. I slept in the living room.
  • I seriously doubt that all her friends are doing it. If they are, they probably don't have permission, maybe their parent's don't keep close enough tabs on them. I would continue saying NO!
  • Say no. My parents told me I can sleep over at my boyfriend's house when I am 18. 14 is way too young, and no parent should allow that. You could tell her it is something to look forward to when she's older. She's still a child, don't give her adult priveledges.
  • No they haven't, she's just trying to convince you. This can be dangerous in many ways, she's just 14 you should not let her let her sleep at her BF's. It's time to be strict.
  • Just say no! I don't think that any of her friends are really staying at their boyfriends houses with their parents permission! When I was 16, my father let my bf stay at our house if we fell asleep watching a movie in the den (he just wouldn't move us). Of course we would wake up dur ing the night.... Atleast don't make it "convenient" for your daughter to be able to sleep with her boyfriend, like my father did.
  • at 14 dont let her - im 15 and i know she is probebly only going over for one main thing :) :)
  • im only fifteen...but my girlfriend is fourteen and if she asked to come over to sleep round, then i wud hope her parents wud come to a compromisation; they wud say yes, but make sure that my parents kept an eye on us and we left the door open at night....i wud not expect them to jus say yes and leave it at that. it also kinda depends on the kinda girl she is n guy that he is...if they are likely to get up to anything, then i think u shud be careful but if they are not at all likely to do much more than kissin n stuff then y not???y shudnt she go over there... like, if i wanted to stay at my gf's house, then i wud want my parents to say yes but i wud expect to be severely limited as to what me n her wud do n where we cud go while there....wot do u mean by the last bit - about the times changin? from wot i know about other bfs nd gfs sleepin round each others, alot of them do it...she may not be lying - probably worth checkin out tho! i have noticed that many people are tellin u to say no until she is 18 - i dont think this is a gud idea...she will feel like u r pickin on her n then she will be more inclined to rebel against the system nd try even harder to slip u a lie and get with her bf n will be more determined to sleep with him. us kids dont like being limited very much. u no, let her go out but not too l8 n stuff...let her go to her boyfriend's house but make sure they r sensible nd his parents r keepin their eye on them......i think 18 is a bit late to start sayin yes...16 is better.
  • well if i say let her go im a bad person and if i say to not let her then my 14 year old self would kick my butt all over the place. i got to go to by bf for weeks at a time but then my dad was(and still is)mental. i had fun and nothing happend. but i will admit that it very easly could have. so i will risk abut whoopping from my past self. KEEP HER HOME AT NITE.
  • I'll bet she is just telling you that in hopes that you will belive her and let her stay. I can't belive that parents would let their "CHILDREN" stay the night at their bf/gf's house. Kids are having sex at a younger age now which is so sad. Don't change your answer to her, stand your ground, you are the parent, she has to follow your rules. My husband and I would NEVER allow our 13 year old to do that, she isn't even allowed to have a bf yet.
  • Times have changed but not to the point where this scenerio would be ok. She's 14 years old and trying to push her limits already. I'm sure I don't have to tell you to hold your ground with this one because no one wants their 14 yr old coming home pregnant. Also, if you gave into this she would just push other issues to see how much more she could get away with. You did the right thing saying no.
  • ummm, NO! Times haven't changed that much. I'd be finding out who, of her friends, spends the night with their boyfriends (&their parents know)..If they are allowed to spend the night with boys whose to say boys aren't staying the night at her friends homes - when she's there no less! 14?? I was skating at 14, going to the mall, hanging out with my "girl" friends--the thought of spending the night with a boy NEVER crossed my mind! My Mom wouldn't even let me take a nap on the couch with my husband (fiance at the time)when I was 20 yrs. old, literally 1 mos. before our wedding!!! I have a 7yr. old daughter and I'm starting to get scared about the next 12-15 yrs.!!!!!
  • NO. Stick to your rules you'll be glad you did. She needs proper guidance now more tha ever.
  • yes, they have changed, but i don't think it's more common than not to have 14 year olds staying at their significant other's household! regardless, you should raise your child with the values you deem important. it's less important what is popular with society. honestly, i think you're daughter is trying to get one over on you.
  • It doesn't matter if times has changed to me. Times are always changing with things that I disagree with. Please just do what your head and heart tells you... No Way.
  • Well, times may have changed but kids don't. Seems like I used that, "but all the others can/have it/do it" phrase on my mother. Don't let her...we can all pretty much imagine what may happen, (no disrespect intended to your daughter or you but 14 yr old's are, well, 14 yr olds!), of course, it may not happen. And what does the boyfriend's parents think about this? Are they prepared to police it? Probably not, they want their sleep too. So, tell your daughter what every other parent has told their child down through the ages ... "No, and I don't care what other girls/your friends/ their parents, are doing - you won't be, so don't nag!" Goodluck and stay firm!
  • Hold your ground. you know and i know what will happen. there are enough pregnant teenagers, already without adding your daughter to the list. Protect her and keep saying no. Do what you have to do.
  • You should not allow your daughter to sleep over at her boyfriend's house. I would tell her that the answer will continue to be no until she is at least graduated from high school. At 14 neither of them are emotionally mature enough for a sexual relationship. The boy would likely brag about his conquest to all his friends, you r daughter would be hurt. Last but not least, she could get pregnant. People should wait until they are married to have sex. I realize that this is very unlikely in our contemporary society, but at least wait until after high school.
  • Times have changed, but a mother/father being protective over their children has not. Stick to your ground if you will, it's just what your parents did. When she grows up she'll do the same thing. It's a cycle really.
  • If you feel that you have a good reason (i.e. the guy's a complete weirdo and takes hard drugs), then continue saying no. However, if you don't have anything to go on beyond your own pride, let her. By all means, contact the guy's parents, but don't try and control your daughter's sex life. Just tell her about condoms and how incredibly important they are.
  • You are resposible for your daughter...she is obligated to abide by your wishes and the rules you set forth. If more parents were a little more concerned where their kids were sleeping, maybe there would be fewer teenage pregnancies. Granted, if they're gonna do it, they will find a way...that does not mean that as parents we should make it easier for them.
  • It depends on what she wants to do there - you need to have a chat and find out, not simply put a foot down without investigation as that can lead to rebellion and your daughter doing exactly what you are trying so hard not to let her do. Bear in mind that it could be as simple as wanting to feel close to him by having something like a sleep-over, just staying up all night and talking - it doesn't neccessarily mean sex, and the fact that she is asking rather than doing, probably means that it doesn't. You should probably talk to the boyfriend's parents and see what they have to say about it and whether they'll be around at the time. They may be in opposition to the idea as well or relegate her to sleeping in the guest room or on the couch. If the parents are going to be there and vigilant it's unlikely any nookie'll be happening. Times have changed - girls who have boyfriends and stay at their boyfriend's houses aren't neccessarily there to have sex, and if they are responsible enough to ask to do it, it is unlikely that they are planning on doing the deed.
  • Yes times have definetly changed, but I am with you absolutely NO!! I have a 14 year old son and a 13 year old daughter and no way no how would that be happening. I know what could happan under those circumstances and neither is ready to be a parent nor am I ready to be a Grandma at 36....
  • yeah, i've heard of this. i'm 24, my younger sister is 19. a few years ago, she was bugging our mom all the time about staying over at his house. and her friends were doing it. their mothers really didn't care, my mom spoke with them. they wanted to be cool moms. she never gave in. you shouldn't either. you're a smart mom.
  • NO WAY - I can't believe that many parents who would let their daughters spend the night at their boyfriends house, whether his parents are home or not!!! And if they do, that is incrediblly irresponsible!! You are doing the right thing by not letting her go. Actually she may be saying that to get you to allow her to go.
  • what does time have to do about it? Do not change your mind. We all used that "everyone else is doing it" story line. You are the parent. she will thank you for this later. and what are his parent's feelings on this? stand firm
  • No is the right answer. Tell the 14 yr old she may want to look into being adopted by those other parents.
  • yeah actually it has haha. I think its changed a lot and i did sleep over my bf's house once or twice but my parents never knew so yeah if i was you i would give in when shes atleast 16 shes gotta learn some time
  • I'm 14 years old and have had a kid and although i love her i wish my mum had protected me from having her so keep saying no she will thank you in the end.
  • OK, Trotsky I have better things to do than argue with you. Hopefully all the parents out there will keep there 14 year old daughters well away from you.
  • From an 18 yr. old point of view NO times have not changed that much. She's feeding you a line. You know the same ones you fed to your parents when you were 14. Just stick to your guns and keep saying NO. But be careful because like anyother teenager she won't take no for an answer and she'll try to sneak out and do it anyways.
  • The only time that changes in my house is my clocks in the spring and fall! There will NOT be any 14 year old boys staying at my house with my daughter nor will she stay at their house. I'm sorry I remember way back in my day kids said the exact same thing, "Well everyone else is doing it." to whatever they wanted to do. I don't care about anyone else in this situation, I only care about my child.
  • You are being snowed! Don't cave.
  • I have three daughters and I would have to answer not just no BUT HELL NO!!! Yes these days most 11 years think they are dating but no it does not make it acceptable. I would not allow my two oldest to date until they were 16. My oldest daughter went to college at 19 and got pregnant which at the time was devastating now that my grandson who is almost 2 is here I cannot imagine life without him. 4 months ago we found out that my 17 year old is pregnant by the first boyfriend she has EVER had so now we have another baby on the way! I am sure when he/she gets here we will love this baby as much as we do Aiden (grandson) but I was not ready for this to happen again. You may think well "did you not talk to your girls about premarital sex and what could happen"? YES ON A DAILY BASIS. These days the peer pressure that is out there is just unbelieveable. I have a 13 year old step daughter who also thinks she should be able to go out with boys and yes I have had the talk with her but I know ultimately she will be put in the position one day...I would just rather it be when she is older than 13, 14, or 15. You can teach your girls what to do and what not to but eventually they will have to make there own decisions. Stand your ground and if she hates you for it then you are still far better than having to sit and cry with her when she is going through childbirth.
  • Times have changed, and some parents do let their young daughters sleep at boys houses, but I encourage you to stick with your beliefs and say No. She might not like it now, but she will appreciate it when she is a bit older and she realises that the first time she stays the night with a guy was a special experience and was shared with a special person, and not the boy she *thought* she loved at the age of 14. Young teenagers certainly do experience intense emotions, and they seem very serious and real at the time, and the last thing that a teenager wants to hear is that what they are feeling is not "real" love or that they are not old enough to make good decisions, so avoid going down this road, and simply tell her the answer is No, because you don't think it is an acceptable thing for her to be doing. I am certain that she will appreciate it when she is older, I know I did. :)
  • Oh hell no...I'm 16 and I would never think to do such a thing. Even if I knew I would play everything safe, stayed away from sex, or trusted my bf, something unexpected could happen. Really shes too young to even think about that. By the way people I know that sleep at their boyfriends house, they are doing it behind their parents backs or they got kicked out or have careless parents...I'd rather do the right thing.
  • No, times have not changed at all... but then again, neither have teenagers...
  • Well, 14 is young, and I know what I did with my 14 Yo GFs when I was 15, You're right to not let her sleep over... If she's with the same guy in a couple of years, at that point, you might reconcider.
  • Yes, they have. It doesn't necessarily mean she's going to have sex, but if she is, have a talk with her about it, protection and all. Most teenagers have some kind of a sex life -- it's expected, whether she goes to his house or not, so in my opinion, it would be better to protect them from utter creeps that would hurt her rather than the sex itself.
  • Yes they have, kids these days are more and more sexually orientated. A close friend of mine has a son, who at the age of 16 was permitted to allow his 15 year old girlfriend move in with him. They were not the only kids in the neighborhood to live this kind of lifestyle. It's perfectly harmless so long as the parents educate the kids of the pitfalls.
  • Well, I am a teenager and even though the times may be changing parents answers never should. The moral, correct answer is and always will be NO no matter what the "times" are. If I was to ask to spend the night at any boys house let alone my boyfriends that is 3 years older than me, my parents would think I was out of my mind. The thought wouldnt even cross my mind especially at 14 years old. Maybe at 17 or 18 if I was still living at home but even then it would be a "when youre on your own you can make our own rules" thing. Hold your ground and continue to be a good parent.
  • Unfortunately yes. But the better parents you are the better person she will grow up to be, even if it means her not getting her way. She'll thank you for it someday.
  • Times have changed. My daughter kept nagging me about this too, she even threatened to do it anyway. I told her to make sure that if she goes, to take everything with her and leave my keys on the table. Once she realized that noone is going to care for her like Mommy does, I never had to worry about this again. Ahhh, the wonder years... Thank God they're over!
  • Shoot... I remember my parents telling me not to stay over my boyfriends house when I was teen... I did anyway cuz I was one of "those" kids... yup! Got pregnant too! You be the judge.
  • I know a lot of people who sleepover at their boyfriend or girlfriends house. But I'm 17, not 14. I'd NEVER let a 14 year old do that. Then you're just enabling them to get into adult situations. If you've got a kid my age, then whatever you're afraid is going to happen if you let them spend the night together, has probably already happened, so i don't see the point in trying to stop them. It's also kind of irritating if you have a sexual relationship to HAVE to leave afterwards. To not have the option of spending the night. I don't think any adult person would want someone to tell them they can't stay the night at their lovers place. It'd turn every sexual experience pretty much into a booty call. *shrug* but still, there's no reason to act like it's okay for a 14 year old. You might rethink when she's older, but really. it's not super necessary.
  • So far, you have acted with the utmost good sense. Don't let on to her that you have any doubts and don't change your answer. Just because the rest of the world is going stark raving crazy doesn't mean you have to. Keep up the good work and do not surrender your resolve.
  • I'm 14, and there's this one girl (notice I said ONE) in my grade whose parents let her sleep over at her boyfriends house. Everyone thinks this is insane; sadly, us teenagers think like parents occasionally lol. But...because of this (along with some other stuff) she's known as a slut. So keep saying no: you're protecting your daughter's..innocence, AND her reputation.
  • It will never be right for a 14 year old to sleep at her boyfriends house. I dont care what year it is.
  • I am 26, and raising my 14 year old sister, and I will tell you what... I may be young, cool, and tragically hip.. but that is just not appropriate. She has years and years to have sex, sleep over, etc. etc. She can wait.
  • Times haven't changed that much. I tell you what my fath told me at 17. You can't sleep at your boyfriends house people with think your a whore.
  • Watever you do, a co-ed sleepover, at least at only 14 is jsut not right, they will get out of hand and do things that they shouldnt do soo young
  • they sure have and keep telling her no.stick to what u say and mean it.tell her if she keeps asking, u wont let her see him anymore.because it could end up being trouble.
  • I think that you are being a good parent. Young girls at getting pregnant as early as 10 in very rare cases. Odds are, either your daughter is telling you the truth about her friends, or her friends are lying to her, or she is lying to you. In any case, I wasn't even allowed to date till I was 18 years old, at 15 I finally convienced my parents to let me date. They would have never allowed him to spend the night. I am glad you are giving her some freedom to date, but you have to stand firm. Just cause her friends parents do that, doesn't make them good parents. People, I feel... are not caring as much for their kids but mainly for themselves. It is sad to say that, but it is true. Some parents don't even bother to remember when their child was born, and their kids are already 6. I applaud you for being a great parent. Years down the road, even if she never thanks you for it, deep down she will know you did the right thing.
  • Times have changed and changed a lot BUT...don't give in. She is 14 for God's sake!! I'm not going to give you a lesson in morals but I will offer this...the next time she tells you all of her friends parents let them stay at their boyfriends houses, ask her which ones, specifically, are doing this? Ask it in a "conversational" type way. When you get an answer, tell her you are going to call those girls parents and ask them if they really do allow their 14 year old daughters to stay overnight with their boyfriends. If they say yes, then your daughter now has 1, 2, 3, etc. less friends to socialize with. And if she won't give you any names, then take it upon yourself to start asking all of her known friends parents the same question, "do you let "Cindy-Lou" stay at "Billy-Bob's" over night?" She will NOT like it and life on the homefront will be rough for awhile but hey...your job isn't to be her friend at this age, it's to be the parent and being a parent sucks sometimes. It comes with the territory.
  • Times have definitely changed. I consider myself to be a pretty open-minded individual, but I can tell you that my 14 yr old WOULD NOT sleep over at her bf's house, period. Don't give in and stand up for what you believe is right.
  • Yes, the times are different now: the teenagers don't hide that they are horny any more.
  • They certainly would not have changed that much in my home or any of my friends and their daughters either.
  • Times have changed, but not that much. It's your job to raise your child with the values that you deem worthy. And you have to make decisions that you feel are best for her EVEN if she doesn't like them. I found that when I openly discussed my feelings regarding matters where my daughter and I disagreed with her, she was able to accept my answer better. She didn't like it, but she understood it. I really think communication is your best weapon when dealing with teenagers.
  • Times are changing, but not that much, I was allowed to go to my boyfriends house when I was 15 but it was a special circumstance, I was not allowed in his bed room past 8:00 (decided on by both my and his parents) and It was because on our one year anniversary he moved to Sacramento and since i was 15 I did not drive making so i would only see him for one weekend a month. But no times have not changed that much, and I know this is sneaky but if you want to find out what she is doing with her boyfriend without having to ask her personally and potentially have her lie to you you could send her an anonymous message using http://hikkup.com and ask her, I hope all turns out okay for you and for your daughter.
  • Times are changing but not THAT much. I can't believe she's just blatantly asking you like that, I would have got more than a "no" if I'd have asked to sleep at my boyfriend's at 14. Whatever happened to coming up with elaborate, fool-proof plans to spend the night out (which always backfired). I don't believe that teenagers these days don't even have the decency to lie to you.
  • im 16 and i even say no. dont let her. 14 is too young. she will just end up pregnet and that would be even worse.
  • Tell NO, times have changed thanks to stupid parents that want to be cool with their kids which is not going to help them in the long run. Its your house your rules no matter how old she is she will have to lisent to you. Trust me she will thank you later. You dont want to see her on myspace with half naked pictures of her and her bf..
  • Dont change your ansswer shes to young and things could happen like things that if your a resposibe parent you wouldnt want your 14 year old daughter doing.
  • The times may have changed but I don't think your answer should.
  • I wouldnt let my daughter stay at her boyfriends house at any age. I dont want her to be like me a parent at 13!
  • Believe it or not. Yes the times have changed that much. But no not everyone of her friends are sleeping at their bf's house. You are very smart for saying no to letting her do that. Because I happen to be sixteen and pregnant right now and because my parents let me do what I wanted to do. So allowing her to sleep over at her boyfriends house could only lead her to where I am right now(pregnant at sixteen). Even if she swears it wouldn't happen...she has no control over what could happen because it all happens so fast and your emotions are insane and you just can't hold back or say no. So keep up the good work so far! Let me know if this helped at all :)
  • No, the times have not changed that much to my knowledge. As the mother of a teenage boy I can tell you that there is NO WAY I would allow him to spend the night with a girlfriend. How old is this boyfriend and what kind of parents does he have that would allow this overnight stay? A 14 year old is too young for any kind of 'serious dating' anyway. There is no reason for it, there are enough problems at that age. Good luck!
  • Thats crazy. Sending your 14 y/o to a boys house. I would never even consider it. Might as well invite the boy in you daughters bedroom with the door closed, candle light, dinner and soft music.
  • She's 14 and has a boyfriend? I highly doubt that her friends are staying over at their boyfriends house, maybe we should send this question and answer to their parents, because it sounds like the need to be aware of what their kids are doing.
  • My fourteen year old uses that line about other parents all the time and I always tell her it's really sad their parents don't care enough about them to make good moral decisions. I would never put her in a position where something could happen that would alter her life forever. This usually shuts her up.
  • No, nothing has changed, 14 year old girls still get in trouble.
  • Kids can be manipulating and can say pretty much anything to get their way. Im 21 years old... and no I am nto allowed to stay at my BF house (expect if we have gone out for the night and I am comming home late - dad would rather i stay there than drive home for 30mins half asleep) The answer is NO. She is too young to understand yor reasons behind "NO"... no matter how hard you try and explain. She is still a child. Treat her like one.
  • ok from a 19 year olds point of view...yes they have changed that much.. but that still doesnt mean u should say yes.. unfortunately i was one of those 14 year olds.. i wasnt having sex but i did want to sleep at my boyfriends house... my parents wouldnt let me.. so i said i was staying at a friends house and stayed there instead.. make sure u do not let her do this! i really regret it now.. i was using my friends and my boyfriend tried to use me. for a little while u will have to be over protective to make sure she doesnt go behind your back!be strong!
  • Look. From a young age I was told about sex and about how important it is to use condoms. That was fairly drummed into my head by the time I even started noticing boys. My parents knew I was sensible and informed, and able to make my own decision. I went on the Pill at 15, and lost my virginity at 16. My boyfriends would come to my house, and I would go to theirs. If teenagers want to have sex, they WILL. They don't need to sleep over at night for that to happen. They can have sex anywhere, anytime. I would rather have my children having sex in my house, knowing they were somewhere safe and using protection, rather than shying away from the topic of sex and driving them to have rushed sex in the back of a car.
  • I'm dealing with the same issue. My 14 year old daughter just told me that she wants to be able to spend the night with her boyfriend for Christmas and if she doesn't get that she doesn't want any other presents. She's been doing a lot of emotional black-mailing lately and I'm tempted (although I think it would be un-motherly) to not get her anything for Christmas because obviously I'm not going to let her spent the night at her boyfriend's house.
  • I'm 14 and understand. Don't let her sleep over there, maybe let him sleep over at your house (he sleeps on the couch and she sleeps in a room across the house where you could catch a sneak) But when the "You don't trust me" "No I don't trust him" stuff comes up expect a real bitching fight. But also understand, it doesn't have to be a sleep over where sex could happen if your worried about that. And if ur worried bout the sex because she might get pregnant, thats not the only way for her to get pregnant. I'm possibly pregnant and have never had sex, never seen the inside of his room, never been alone with him for more than 5 minutes. But it happened. So my advice is to let him sleep over at your house and keep them in two completely different rooms where you could catch them if they tried to sneak. And the "friends" thing is complete crap. Sometimes we'll just tell you that to try to see if you let us. But tell her she isn't them and to be an individual. If they're all doing it, why follow the crowd, tell her to be different so she can change the world. Luck, a possibly pregnant 14 year old
  • Times have changed, but not for the better. You are being wise in being careful. Don't lose that.
  • Well, times have changed, yeah, but let me explain the point of 'everyone else is doing it'. Girl 1 sleeps over at her boyfriend's house because 'everyone else is doing it'. Girl 2 sleeps over at her boyfried's house because 'everyone else is doing it'. So your daughter wants to, because 'everyone else is doing it'. It's just one big circle. Say no!
  • Not everyone else is doing it as i dont know any of my kids mates who are doing it
  • Unfortunately they have, but if she wants to stay over there so bad why not ask if she wants to have him over, maybe with a few more people. Don't hover but make sure that nothing mischievous is occurring. My daughters boyfriend stays the night and is almost part of our family. Just make sure that your daughter has her boundaries set.
  • Wow, this really isn't an answer, but I have to say. This is the first question that brought me to AB! Funny to see it so long again after I came :D.
  • Parenting hasn't changed in that respect, in my opinion. I'm 17 and I have definately had temptations to sleep at my bf's but I always go home anyway. It makes me feel "cheap",like I'm willing to risk my future for a night together. She has plenty of time to spend with him while they go out during the day.
  • Well when i was five, my 12 year old boyfriend stayed over at my house and we had a "blast"
  • This is what I always say to my kids. "Your friends are not my concern. You are my daughter, they're not. I said NO, I mean NO, and that's that."
  • Ok im 16 yes times have changed alot. All of my friends lost heir virginities and talk about sex alot. Im the only virgin out of all my friends (and plan on keeping it that way for a while) I can't disagree with that answer, i am a guy and i know most of us are well perverted. At that age its even worse. Middle school is where 80% of the students start having sex.The rest either in high school or college not many wait till marriage anymore. It's sad but true
  • Unfortunately I believe they have. But as a parent of three girls I will say you have the final say and only you can tell her no. There are many girls and boys involved in "sleep overs" doesnt mean your daughter has to be in that group.
  • i agree do not let her do this shes asking your permission 4 under age sex and this should not be given to her
  • If all her friends were allowed to jump off of cliffs, would you let her, too?
  • NO!NO!NO! That is the best answer I can give you. Chances are her friends are not allowed to sleep at their BFs houses, and even if they are, they probably sneak it anyways. On the off chance that their parents allow it, that says a lot about their parenting skills. I am 19, and when I was that age, I wanted the same thing. Thankfully, my parents always said no. period. Even if it is just a harmless sleepover, there is temptetion there that as a good parent, it is your job to help her avoid.
  • I had my first daughter young - pregnant at 17, had her just after I turned 18. And I was an excellent student, straight A's, college scholarships that I didn't even know what to do with, I had so many - so I know from experience that even "good, smart kids" can get pregnant, even when they are trying their hardest not to. But I also remember that at 14, I was NOT ready to date, let alone have a "boyfriend." That was way too heavy for me. It was 2 more years beforeI felt ready, before I dated, and had "real boyfriends." Now my daughter is 14, nearly 15. And I live with her day in and day out. And though she is physically mature, I know that she is not ready for the struggles that come with dating. Her self-image is too fragile for the crap that goes on (more now than ever) - in the dating world. Having said all that, what I really mean to say is - there is a LOT to factor in when deciding what you think is best for your child. It varies from kid to kid. Nobody knows YOUR child better than you do, so you need to make your decisions. But as other posters have said - letting my child stay at a boyfriend's (or a boy friend) house ? It's never going to happen. Not until she's living on her own, and is responsible for making her own decisions. Because as a minor, that's MY job, and I'll do what I think is best for her.

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