ANSWERS: 21
  • Tell inlaws to mind there own bees wax! Its your baby!
  • You do what you believe to be right. This is your child to raise and teach and protect not theirs. You should also talk to your fiance because if this is how his family feels then chances are he will as well so you need to talk with him about how you both plan on parenting.
  • Eleven months is way too young to know between right or wrong. A stern no will do for now.
  • Wow. I believe in spanking, but at that age, I'm not sure the child would understand why it was being punished. I see the window as quite a bit smaller than that. I'll spank a three year old through a 5 year old. If you do it right, the need for spankings evaporates at about that age anyway.
  • redirect his interest if possible, spanking is too much for that age to me. sometime, at a little older age spanking might deter disobedience, but 11 mos. is and that reason is not right. I hope they won't be interfereing for you all the time, talk to your fiance.
  • It's a little young, but not by much. I work in child care, and 15 month olds start to understand it. Not a far stretch. But it's your child and future inlaws be damned. You do what you feel in right.
  • You need to stick to your own method of child raising. Do not let them bully you. I don't believe in spanking - ever, but that's not what your question is about. Find some sources online that agree with you and you'll feel more confident about your choice.
  • I don't believe in spanking period! And if they are picky paticular about the way you raise YOUR child then they can just fly away some where. You decide when and how, they shouldn't have said anything in the first place.
  • he isn't even a year old, u shouldn't spank him just say no and if that doesn't work redirect his attention to sumthing that he can do like his toys or sumthing. spanking is not an option for a child that young.
  • When my son was that old, what I would do was spank his hand ONCE and tell him that's a no no. I don't think I literally spanked him till he was 2 years old though, and not even much then. Just make sure that you're setting a consistant example that he can learn from is my suggestion, whether that involves spanking or not.
  • Tell Them JESUS DIDN'T SLAP NO BABY!
  • I would be even more worried if your fiance agreed with his parents! That spells trouble down the line.....possibly major trouble! An 11 month old is too young to associate the pain with what he's doing wrong. All it will accomplish is a growing insecurity towards those who are supposed to love him! Redirect his attention. If an emergency happens, such as his going for a light socket, grab his hands and lightly spank one of them. Point to the outlet and say, "NO! That will HURT you!" Aside from that, your busybody inlaws need to get a damn grip and back off!
  • I agree with Philis, but here's something else. When my kids were young, around the same age i spanked my son way to often and his behavior got worse and worse until one day i finally figured out that spanking him only did one thing. It got my attention when it was what he wanted all along. Children want your attention negative or positive, Now it's your choice of what type of attention you want your child to have from you. If you want your child to have a positive atmosphere of loving attention from you then great. If, on the other hand you want them to have negative attention and that attention to involve unnecessary pain which could lead to abuse then that's on you, but I don't think from what you're asking that you want to spank your child. Tell your fiance that it's you and your child or his family and their brutal ways if it comes to that, but you don't want your child spanked. And..you CAN enforce this as well by simply stating that if any of them ever lays a hand on your child police will be called. If you do say that and they do spank him or her against your wishes then don't back down. have them arrested for child endangerment. Hopefully it won't ever come to that, but the short and skinny is to tell them to butt out, tell your BF or GF, whatever that spanking is OUT period. If they don't like it then find someone else. I know that sounds harsh, but I know people who take spanking to extremes and some who don't. The problem is you don't know to what extremes they might have in store for your child or if it's the occasional pat on the bottom. Personally I don't know i would really want to find out. Ultimately the decision is yours and you have to make that decision. Is your child more important or is his family and him more important? My son had to teach me the hard way for him. That is and always has been the single biggest regret of my entire life, spanking my kids. At 50 now I find it VERY easy to deal with very unruly kids without any kind of violence. A smile and hug goes a hell of a lot further than brutality and pain in every instance with children. I know that to be undisputed fact regardless of what some of the "spankers" think because they simply don't think. Good luck with your decisions. ;)
  • Child buttock-battering vs DISCIPLINE: Child buttock-battering for the purpose of gaining compliance is nothing more than an inherited bad habit. Its a good idea for people to take a look at what they are doing, and learn how to DISCIPLINE instead of hit. I think the reason why television shows like "Supernanny" and "Dr. Phil" are so popular is because that is precisely what many (not all) people are trying to do. There are several reasons why child buttock-battering isn't a good idea. here are some good, quick reads recommended by professionals: Plain Talk About Spanking by Jordan Riak, The Sexual Dangers of Spanking Children by Tom Johnson, NO VITAL ORGANS THERE, So They Say by Lesli Taylor M.D. and Adah Maurer Ph.D. Most compelling of all reasons to abandon this worst of all bad habits is the fact that buttock-battering can be unintentional sexual abuse for some children. There is an abundance of educational resources, testimony, documentation, etc available on the subject that can easily be found by doing a little research on "spanking". Just a handful of those helping to raise awareness of why child buttock-battering isn't a good idea: American Academy of Pediatrics, American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, Center For Effective Discipline, PsycHealth Ltd Behavioral Health Professionals, Churches' Network For Non-Violence, Nobel Peace Prize recipient Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Parenting In Jesus' Footsteps, Global Initiative To End All Corporal Punishment of Children, United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child. In 26 countries, child buttock-battering is prohibited by law (with more in process). In fact, the US was the only UN member that did not ratify the Convention on the Rights of the Child.
  • lol can a baby even talk at 11 months? you dont spank an infant
  • visit www.nospank.net
  • you tell them this isn't the 80's.
  • Not before 4-5 years old i think.
  • Not until there atleast 5. As for your Fiance you can tell him that that is how you want to raise your kid
  • spanking does NOT teach a child right from wrong no matter how old they are. if you spank all they are going to know is the OUCH and nothing els you parent how you want to.dont listen to other people
  • never ever spank a child..i understand that frustration gets the best of you..but its no good in the long run..it has horrible effects..and it doesnt teach the child anything..speak with your child..say no..and explain why it's a no..and reinforce good behavior..praise him/her for the good things he/she has done..and i don't mean "good boy" i mean "wow..you did that very nice"...the "family" has no say..you are the mother..either ignore them or say something to make them back off..whether it is taken in a bad way or not is their problem..think about your relationship with your child and husband and think about your childs future...i can tell by your question that you care about the way your child is brought up..and i applaud you for that..you seem to be a good mother..good luck!!!

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