Subject: George W.'s Resume!!! >> >> >>> This is scary reading... >>> *I Need a Job* >>> I will be available in January 2009, and I am willing to relocate. >>> >>> *RESUME: **GEORGE W. BUSH* >>> 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue >>> Washington, DC 20520 >>> >>> *LAW ENFORCEMENT:* >>> * I was arrested in Kennebunkport , Maine , in 1976 for driving under >>> the influence of alcohol. >>> I plead guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended >>> for 30 days. >>> My Texas driving record has been 'lost' and is not available. >>> >>> *MILITARY:* >>> * I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL. >>> I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use. >>> By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat >>> duty in Vietnam . >>> >>> *EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:* >>> * I graduated from Yale University with a low C average. I was a >>> cheerleader. >>> *PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:* >>> * I ran for U.S. Congress and lost. >>> * I began my career in the oil business in Midland , Texas , in 1975.. >>> I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. >>> The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock. >>> * I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that >>> took land using taxpayer money. >>> * With the help of my father and our friends in the oil industry >>> (Including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas. >>> *ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS **GOVERNOR OF TEXAS*:** >>> * I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, >>> making Texas the most polluted state in the Union. >>> During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most >>> smog-ridden city in America. >>> * I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of >>> billions in borrowed money. >>> * I set the record for the most executions by any governor in >>> American history. >>> * With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my >>> father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President of the >>> United States , after losing by over 500,000 votes. >>> *ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:* >>> * I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with a >>> criminal record. >>> * I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over >>> one billion dollars per week. >>> *I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury. >>> * I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history. >>> * I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any >>> 12-month period. I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a >>> 12-month period. >>> * I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of >>> the U.S. stock market. >>> * In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their >>> jobs and that trend continues. >>> * I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any >>> administration in U.S. history. >>> My 'poorest millionaire, 'Condoleezza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker >>> named after her. >>> * I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. >>> President. I am the all-time U.S. and world record -holder for >>> receiving the most corporate campaign donations. >>> My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, >>> Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in >>> U.S. history, Enron. >>> * My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys >>> to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election >>> decision. >>> * I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton against >>> investigation or prosecution. >>> * More time and money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky >>> affair than has been spent investigating one of the biggest corporate >>> rip-offs in history. >>> * I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and >>> refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was >>> revealed.. >>> * I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history. >>> * I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be >>> awarded government contracts. >>> * I appointed more convicted criminals to my administration than any >>> President in U.S. history. >>> * I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest >>> bureaucracy in the history of the United States Government. >>> * I've broken more international treaties than any President in U.S. >>> history. >>> * I am the first President in U.S. history to have the United Nations >>> remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission. >>> * I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law. >>> * I refused to allow inspector's access to U.S. 'prisoners of war' >>> detainees and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention. >>> * I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations >>> election inspectors (during the 2002 US election). >>> * I set the record for fewest numbers of press conferences of any >>> President since the advent of television. >>> * I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year >>> period. >>> * After taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the >>> worst security failure in U.S. history. >>> * I garnered the most sympathy ever for the U.S. after the World >>> Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. >>> the most hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy >>> in world history. >>> I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to >>> simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people), >>> shattering the record for protests against any person in the history >>> of mankind. >>> * I am the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, >>> preemptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. >>> I did so against the will of the United Nations, the majority of >>> U..S. Citizens and the world community. >>> * I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut >>> in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families in wartime. >>> * In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for >>> attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on our British friends. >>> * I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans >>> (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and >>> security. >>> * I am supporting development of a nuclear 'Tactical Bunker Buster,' >>> aWMD. >>> * I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden >>> to justice. >>> >>> *RECORDS AND REFERENCES:* >>> * All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my >>> father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view. >>> * All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my >>> bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public >>> view. >>> * All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President >>> attended, regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and >>> unavailable for public review. >>> * I specified that my sealed documents will not be available for 50 >>> years. >>> >> > > > ---------------------------------

Interesting...and scary...read, isn't it?

Wonder why the GOP settled for this Bush...everyone thinks Jeb would have been much much better, including all the Democrats I know. Funny how life works out, isn't it? :(