I think if it was bringing me a lot of pain, I would probably not answer it - that is answer in itself for the letter writer. Saying sorry is all well and good, but sometimes, it is not enough to erase the pain of what has occurred between two people. Good Luck

I would let them apologize, not necessarily forgiving them, but letting them say what they they needed to get off their chest. What's the worst that could happen from just letting someone you were once close to say sorry.

Always, always respond to another human being saying 'I'm sorry'. Especially if sincere. This does not mean that all responses are favorable. Consider the ones later found to be insincere, or recognized as such almost as soon as the words tumble from the lips (as from certain cons and obvious manipulators among us). But on the face of it, we owe it to ourselves, really, to deal with an apology. Even if it as simple as 'I accept your apology, but do not want to go any further with it just now.', or some sort of reply. Why? Because the apology by definition is a recanting of the offense, whatever it was. This is NOT a justification, or even a minimization, of whatever it was/is that the apology refers to. It is a recognition and admission by the PERPETRATOR that such behavior was/is wrong, and that they are on some level, remorsefull. The problem is in discerning that degree or level. Sometimes we see the entrenched offender simply is sorry he was caught, more of a 'woe is me' sort of thing. Sometimes it is genuine, but later comes out to be for ulterior reasons. So in the final view, accept it and move on. Later you can choose to go farther or not. You keep ownership of your own thoughts and feelings, and are not manipulated or swayed by whatever blows your way. But do not throw aside what may be advantageous to you, in however small a fashion, now or later in your life. At least give a chance that you yourself would want others to give you.