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by Annonymous on January 6th, 2009

Annonymous

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I have a low self-esteeem, People always tell me "Your sister is pretty, you guys don't really look alike". i have always fought with my self-esteem and I want to be more confident but I don't know how. Can anybody help me?

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Answers. 9 helpful answers below.

  • by Phillis - Zacks little sister on January 19th, 2009

    Phillis - Zacks little sister

    My first suggestion would be to get rid of the people in your life who are rude enough to say things like that to you!
    My second suggestion is to practice loving yourself and all those things about you that are so lovely, both inside and out. Make this a part of your daily life until it becomes a habit.

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  • by Anon y mouse on January 6th, 2009

    Anon y mouse

    First off, instead of thinking that someone else can help you with this, decide that you are going to help yourself. It might sound odd but it's an approach that directly tackles low self esteem. You're starting by taking action yourself, rather than being passive and putting the onus on someone else to do things for you.

    Also, watch how you feel and react when the usual thoughts come up that you are somehow not good enough. Don't try and push those thoughts away, simply watch them and allow them to come and go. Fairly soon, you'll begin to notice that these things are a habitual response and really don't have much at all to do with reality. These thoughts are a kind of mental knee jerk reaction as it were. Once you see that this pattern of thinking is not related to reality, it will begin to lose it's hold over you. Meditation is very helpful for this btw, as is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy.

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  • by Eve on January 19th, 2009

    Eve

    Yes, love yourself is the solution to this problem of you. Recall every morning the things which you like in your self and recall every compliment you have ever got in your life. One more thing to do: whenever any one compare you to your sister and say she is more pretty, just say coolly:"SHE IS PRETTY BECAUSE SHE IS MY SISTER"

    make them zip off with your presence of mind.

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  • by engineer is Terminator on January 19th, 2009

    engineer is Terminator

    Everyone is created in a unique way,so you'll be insulting yourself by comparing yourself to others and listening to those sick looks judging maniacs.

    You are unique in yourself.Try to know your own strengths.I was in the same plight as yours,some years ago.Lack of confidence and low self esteem because of some sick opinions.When I shut the doors of my mind to those sick opinions,there was a magical change.After a period of 2 years the opnions changed drastically in my favour.
    So don't get happy with praises or sad with adverse comments.Just be normal and yourself.Best wishes.

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  • by littlemiss on January 19th, 2009

    littlemiss

    You know its sad that you always have to be compared to your sister, one of my biggest things that I make sure doesnt happen in my house is the younger ones being compared to the older one, everyone is good at something and everyone has a different aspect what people need to remember.

    You really need to believe in yourself, you are just as beautiful as your sister and just as special as her so dont let anyone else make you think otherwise.

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  • by wolfsquestions99 on January 6th, 2009

    wolfsquestions99

    Try looking at yourself in the mirror, and instead of thinking about how you two dont look alike, or the fact that people say she's pretty, Think about what do YOU like about yourself? Your image is yours to conveh and you should be the first to bring these positive traits out, So what you two dont look alike, that dosent mean your not as pretty. You just have to stop listening to the things that people say comparing you to someone else, Your not your sister, Your YOU.
    I know its hard, I have the same problem, but I embrace the differences I have with everyone else, and even take them onestep further :)

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  • by Miss "I'll try to help" on May 16th, 2011

    Miss

    You know what? I have low self-esteem as well. But not as much as before. I used to be obssessed with my looks. But it's not healthy, I realised.
    I gave it up.
    I became religious.

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  • by shyguy on January 6th, 2009

    shyguy

    Frist how old are you, and older or younger sister?

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  • by DarkMaskDiva/KBHCI on April 13th, 2011

    DarkMaskDiva/KBHCI

    I know this isn't the point, but I'm thinking of the ugly duckling who turned out to be a swan. Maybe you haven't grown into your beauty yet. Also, just because you don't look like your sister doesn't mean you are ugly. People say things that are socially retarded sometimes.

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