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What US political party would Jesus be a member of? Why? Jesus would be for smaller government, not more.

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What was the last thing you dropped or spilled on your keyboard? I spilled my guts out. Ooops.

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What if there really is a God, but the concepts offered so far seem so illogical you can't have belief in him/it? Watch the Discovery Chanel if you can't figure out that something much grander than our minds can understand designed our small world and vast universe. Then out the window with all logic.

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Do you have a relative in prison? Not yet. My little brother has a 3 year suspended sentence hanging over his head with two warents in two different counties. Both probation violations. I feel it want be long. He got started on pain pills from a baseball injury in collage. Now he's doing heroin off campus. He got kicked out in his senior year. They busted him with an aray of drugs closely mimicing the briefcase featured in...

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What's your favorite color for a summer pedicure? I pay lots attention to feet. I like seeing a french pedicure, but I like to see the usual pink with white tips changed up a bit. I think a hot pink with lime green tips would really make your bathing suit kick. Not that its kicking already you just need that little extra touch.+3

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What is a movie scene that willhaunt you for a long time? Squill like a pig WEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! WEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

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What is innocent wile a sleep and is not when awake? That little bundle of joy your holding in your arms in your pic.

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Besides a vehicle, what was the last object you touched that was outside? I pat my dogs head on the way in.

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What film changed the way you lived your life or will in the future? Deliverance. I was young when I first saw that on HBO. and that part with that guy having to squill like a pig just changed my way of looking at people. I'm wasn't big on trust after that. Kind of more a watch my back kind of person after that you know.+3

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Is there anything good about communism? (2009-09-17) Find good in Communism Yes!!! The Voltswagon Bug.

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If you had to define yourself with a quote, which would you choose? If it ain't alright somethings bound to be wrong.

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When is an awkward time to expel gas LOUDLY!? Nothng awkward about that. I always feel so much better afterwords. Plus mine just smell good.

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Do you own more than two dogs? Yes me and my 2 dogs aren't homeless. We own a house and other stuff as well.

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Would you be mad, if you found me jumping on the couch? No I would get excited.

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What's something that gets better with age? Me

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Psychiatrists say the darndest things...what's something a psychiatrist might say about You? I can't help you with that but they are in the process of developing new drugs that might.

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What's something you have found in the laundry, besides clothes of course? My cousin, we were playing hide and seek.

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Is there a place to truly hide from the world, have someone take care of me and let me see life clearly? No money. Jail. Brake some petty law and claim your innocent untill you feel good and rested then plea guilty and take time served. You can see a schrink while you are there, sign up for lots of government programs, and meet lots of interesting new friends.

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Where can I take you for the next month to get away from it all? oops

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Would you move to Denver and why? No but I would buy a second home out there. My sister lives in Denver and I have a high school buddy who just relocated to Cheyenne, Wyoming. Its a nice change of pace. I wouldn't live in Denver city limits I would have to get off the beaten path a little bit but not to much.+3

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Where can I take you for the next month to get away from it all? Swiss Alps, and yes they do have pizza.

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Can you touch your nipple/nipples with your tongue? I think my tongue is long enough its my nipples that are to short. Thanks now I feel less than.

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HHow do you know if I have a perverted mind or not? I your not sure then you are for sure.

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Do you like to cuddle with your s/o before you fall to sleep or do you need your space at night? Give me some space please.

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What goes round the house and in the house but never touches the house? Karma

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I woke up today and my balls started to hurt the left one why does it hurt? Your girlfriend kicked you in the nuts while you were sleeping.

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What was the longest unplanned roadtrip you have ever been on? I was in Florida one min. and the next thing I know is this cop is tapping on my window to wake me up. I was in Milwaukee Wiss.

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How do I disable the "check engine" light in a 1999 Camry, at least temporarily? With a ball ping hammer.

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Here goes... Whats the best way to approach a girl you have a crush on if you're already friends? From behind with a large net, you will be sure to catch her.

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Can you gain weight from being on the pill? If the pill is a plasadil.

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Where did the saying, "Run for the hills" come from? The other choice was a river and nobody knew how to swim.

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What's the cheapest way to go from one island to another in Hawaii? I'm trying to go from Oahu to the Big Island... Hitch-hike, careful with that thumb, don't want to pull back a nub.

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Have you ever met someone in person that you met on AB first? No but I hear Barbie Doll is dying to meet me.

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What do you do after a really great date? After a really great date, masterbate!

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How many car's do you own? Six vans, Chevy truck, Montero, 69 Pontiac Conv. that makes nine.

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Do you think a girl that wears small revealing tops is sexy? Lets see the pic of the girl and top then vote. I think we should see the top seperate from the girl to avoid confusion.

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Why is your Mama all upset? Cause she heard I was hanging out with the likes of you.

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If you were a stalker on here who would you stalk? I would have to find a gig that pays. I'm getting kind of low on cash.

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How long can your car run with the gas tank on e (empty)? Untill it runs out of gas or tradgedy strikes.

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When I try to send out a e-mail it says human verification failure. What am I doing wrong? Obviously you have done something to make your computer think your non-human.

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Do you remember what song was played/sang at your wedding? I don't remember what happened that day at all, much less what song was being played.

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What do you think is better rock or rap Better for what?

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When someone says "bad juju" what does this mean? It means their pet, by name of Juju has done something bad.

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What is something you have gone through in your life that you wouldn't wish on anyone? Living in a tent smoking crack.

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You like your women (or men) the way you like your... what? I'm more of a dog person. You can keep the woman and the men.

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How far can cats travel? To infinity and beyond.

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How mature are you? I am less mature today than I was yesterday.

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American, cheddar or Swiss cheese? I'll take all three.

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How many times have you been in love? Today,4 no 50 times.

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What time will you go to bed tonight? I'm in bed right now just haven't gone to sleep yet.

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How many times can you hop on one leg without stopping. I ain't falling for this one.

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Who fixed your little red wagon? Mine is still broken.

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Do you think God ever throws his omnipotent hands in the air and says "What was I thinking!? No, he knows whats going on. I'm in Gods Will rather I like it are not. I am one prime example to others of how not to do things. Its takes all kinds to make the world go round

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I really need to fast forward things to friday. How do I go about doing that? I'm trying to practice patients here.

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Should Libertarians from their own nation of "Libertaria"? Who would be president? Old Mrs. Philips the school librarian, duuuuuuu.

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Why is blood thicker than water? Because water is thinner than blood. Unless the water is frozen and the blood is warm and flowing. Then what?

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Should I push it or pull it? Push and pull push and pull.

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What was your favorite board game growing up? Mouse Trap and Candyland was my first. Clue and Battleship were my favorite.

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If women ruled the world, would there be less violence or more violence? Yes, more or less.

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What does weed realy do you that is that bad? Look if you want to smoke weed then smoke weed. Some people have problems with it some people don't. Figure it out for yourself. I do know one thing from self experiance it can cause you to have trouble with the law. You might want to think about moving some place where its not punishable by law.

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What would you say your dating experience is like? Vast. I could write a book on it. Funny, sad, exciting, and boring book.

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If you starving and your fridge is empty! what do you do for food? Go get a hot dog, I'm buying. Tell the clerk i'll be in to pay in about an hour.

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If someone left you a voice message, how soon would you call back? If it was buisness asap, I don't like to waiste time.

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What time do you like to rise and shine? Depends on what i've got going on, before 7, after 6.

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My cat gets me up by pawing at me about 630 every morn. after i feed him i try and go back to bed he wont let me !! why? You have to be the boss. punish him for not leaving you alone buy closing him up in the bathroom. I never let my cat out of the bathroom when he cries. No I'm not mean I just have well behaved animals.

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Where is the strangest place that you've found your keys when you've misplaced them? In my left hand.

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If you snort viagra does it work faster? Why don't you try it and report back to us say in one hours time. Go!!

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Do you like purple drank? As in taisting a grapico burp. Not really into it.

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Have you ever fought a pig? Yes and I won. Turned him into a BLT. One time I didn't win and he slammed me with one of those 2ft. long flashlights. The lights went out.

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What is the last miracle you noticed in your life? I quit smoking cigs. Jan. 10 2009, haven't had one since.

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Could I have a kiss? Yes, but don't keep it in your pocket. The chocolate will melt and make a nasty mess.

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How old was Humpty Dumpty when he died? He never did hatch he was still an egg. A good ole egg he was. He had a stressful job it wasn't all that it was cracked up to be.

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If you had your choice, which had you rather lose........your cellphone or your wallet or pocketbook? Cell phone because I keep a backup.

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If love is just a game, how come I've never won? Love is not a game its a second hand emotion, i thought everyone knew that.

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I am looking to purchase my first car. Any suggestions or ideas for what car may be worth it? Not looking for an amazing first car, just something that works and won't let me down. That also doesn't make me embarassed to drive. =) Isusu Rodeo its almost the same car as the Honda Pathfinder but with not so high resale value. The rodeo is a good dependable car you can find cheap. Its sits up kind of high so its easy to see out of, and people can better see you.

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What do you dressup for? Weddings and funerals. Thats about it.

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Have you ever broken a bed during sex like on the movies? I broke a bed while moving does that count for anythng?

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Why is Barack Obama talked about on AB every single day? He just so happens to be the President of The United States of America. What day would you exspect him not to be talked about.

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Have you ever given a speech? If so, what was it about? Yes. About my favorite subject, Me.

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If you could get a FREE Computer for appearing on the Oprah Show, to talking about your sex life, Would you? Heck yea I would. It would be old news. Have a girlfriend but don't have sex with her. Not into fornicating now a days.

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Is there a law against lookin' like this? Yes I'm going to have to handcuff you and give you a spanking.

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Why is it that people can't keep their religions to themselves? Did someone force you to go to their church?

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What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this? I'm not a nice girl you silly goose just another dude in a mini skirt and push up bra.

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If I have told you once I have told you a thousand times. Don't____________the ________! spank the monkey!

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Anybody ever refused to accept your $2 bill? No but I look kind of imtimidating, people don't even ask me for a movie stub, I do always buy one.

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What do people still have respect for? Rodney Dangerfield

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What can i do to make you love me? :) [ humor welcomed ] Give me a trust fund.

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Is the mafia ever forgiving? Forgiven, maybe, forgotten, no.

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What do you think of cleavage on girls, at age 15-16? I think 15 will get you 20.

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What's your favourite holiday? Thanksgiving. People concentrate on good food, parades and football. I mean really, does it get any better.

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In what category on AB do you aspire to be an expert? Is there a catergory for bull poop?

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You now have the chance to be good guy or a bad guy...who do you want to be?....I am the Shadowed Witch (she fought on the side of the good) I am Captain Damnit Man, protecting Planet Earth from evil vilans such as Fridgid Bitch and Dr. Asshole.

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Have you ever started to ask a question, then completely forgotten the point of it? lol I have started to ask a question and forgot the question all together.

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The president is spending entirely too much time _______ and not enough time doing his job. The president is a puppet, I would not worry about what he does just keep you yard looking nice, pay your cable bill and make a contribution to you favorite charity. The universe will keep running in spite of our petty thoughts.

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Which did you watch most, Sesame Street, The Muppet Show or Fraggle Rock? You have got to love those two old guys in the upper balcany making fun of The Muppet Show.

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How do you feel about trying new things? If its ice cream bring it on.

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How often should a couple have sex. Some couples should never have sex.

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If not here -where? Shut up and hit the block.

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E.T. vs. Yoda? I'm putting all my money on the short, ugly, kind of greenish greyish alien looking dude.

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Which do you prefer, light-colored, or dark-colored, cars? Live down south, white is cool.

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If Whiskey makes you frisky and Brandy makes you randy,What does Beer make you? Beer makes you veer.

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If you were being followed what would you do? Loose em.

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Never turn your back on_______(Fill the blank) family.

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If you had the choice to have a superhuman power, what would it be? I already have one, nice undergarments.

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Do You think if You were immortal and after 10.000 years have already heard most conversations, could You get bored of talking? Glad you brought that up maybe I should take up knitting.

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If you had to choose ONE, would you rather be rich, famous, unimaginably hansome/pretty or a genius? I was born a genius with poor spelling abilities. If I do become rich I would rather hire someone to be famous.

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What comes to mind with the word HUSKY? Dogs pulling sleds in the snow. Yellow snow.

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Did you double dip the chip? Yes and i'm allowed. I live alone.

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Cookies or Ice-cream? They go great together why split them up? Pass the milk please.

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One good turn_________(fill the blank) does not make up for all the bad ones.

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Have you ever had a really close friend fall in love with you but you did not want to pursue a romantic relationship with them? If so how did you handle it? Yea. A good friend of mine Neil, came on to me. Said he was in love. Had to break that friendship off. I didn't know he was gay. I just couldn't deal with it. Hated to loose a good friend wish he would have never told me.

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Chocolate or sex? Can I have mine covered with chocolate and eat it to?

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What is the most dangerous drug? The one that you are addicted to.

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I once saw a Starbucks across the street from 2 more starbucks, side by side. What have you seen that might represent the end of the universe? You! trying to figure out which Starbucks to go in first.

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What would be your weapon of choice in the grocery store? I would choose one of those frozen turkeys with handle. You could really beat the breaks off something whith that.

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What do you do when you are startled? Flench

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What are you ready to do for 1million$?be honnest I would also sell Earth Dragons sister.

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What is something that starts with the letter T that you would find in a park? Toads, tricycles, trees, trucks, ted, tim, tommy, terry, tracy, theresa, truck, tint, tracks, toes, and tumble weeds.

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If you had to cheer someone up, what would you say? Hip Hip Huray!!!!!!!!

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To my mind one cannot be a saint without experiencing sin -do you agree Your mind, yes I agree.

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My dog is called LP - what name have or would you give yours The vet caught me off guard when he asked me what the name of my dog was that I had rescued that day so I told him BP because he was living on my back porch. Its pronounced Beepy. I still call him that and he has been the best dog.

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Is age really important? Yes could you imagine giving drivers license to six year olds.

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Oh my!! I seem to have lost my favorite purple dress shirt! Can you help me find it or tell me where it is? Afterall, I've heard that purple is the new black! Have you looked at yourself? Maybe you have it on.

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Why do i feel like such a failure Have you stoped trying. As long as you keep trying you are not a failure

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What would your last meal be and why? It doesn't matter what you eat as much as who you eat with

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We have met before right? Yes, but can we just not talk about.

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What color is better black or pink? Black is not a color, black has no color.

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If I offered you $100 would you pull my finger? If you offered me $100 I would kindly take it, thank you, but no I wouldn't pull your finger or your leg, that would be just rude.

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Do you always use your manners, such as please, thank you, and no thank you? Why or why not? No, because sometimes I'm an asshole.

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Is there any thing on earth besides cockroches and led that can witstand a nucleur blast Cheese Wiz and Spam.

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Do you find sailors exciting? A female sailer in a short skimpy little sailers outfit with the ocean spray beaded up over her sexy body. Yes that excites me.

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Why is it i can fall 15 feet down a slope onto my face and it doesn't hurt..but if i stub my toe it hurts soooooo badly..? You have sensitive feet, get over it.

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(Just for fun) How would you get yogurt off of your computer? LOL :) I would let my cat lick it up.

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I'm an absolute sucker when it comes to_________? Not much of anything been around the block. Don't mind helping but not much on getting suckered in.

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Is it good to be weird? If some weirdo calls you weirdo are you a weirdo?

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What's big and purple? Purple mountains majesty

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If you could bring back one item from your childhood that you no longer have what would it be? My Six Million Dollar Man Collection. I had everything the space capsule that turns into an operation table. It might be a toss up between that, Planet of the Apes, and Fat Albert collections. Hard to choose, I had some cool toys now that I get to thinkng about it.

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If you could meet (in person) any other Answerbagger, who would it be? You! Want to see what I look like look at my space under allan muddiman

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If your best friend or s/o murdered someone, would you turn them in? If it depends upon the circumstance what circumstance would have to exist to make you tell or not tell? Well if I were involved I wouldn't tell.

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Does crime pay nowadays? Why? Do you know someone who is looking to hire a criminal? If you do let me know were to send my resume and list of refernces.

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What is the best use for human skin? Keeps bugs, clothes and lint from sticking to your flesh.

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Do you think a mustache is a good look for a man? Yes! It would look better on a man than on a woman.

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What is irreversible? You can't unpickle a pickle.

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Can tattoos be addictive? Try it and find out for yourself.

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How often do you think about "the one that got away"? Every frickin time I eat fish.

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Anyone think of a good question i could ask? You could ask me for my phone number.

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Are you Male or Female? If you can't tell what differance does it make.

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Are you good or bad most of the time? I behave inbetween misbehaving.

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Can you write a poem making the word orange rhime. This sounds kind of strange What can you arange Before I ride the range For breakfast an orange

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What is the biggest lie you ever told My first lie was the bigest. I lied about brushing my teeth to my Mom.

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What is your most worn and loved item of clothing My flip flops that go flip when they flop.

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What is the biggest risk youve ever taken Took down a dope house one time.

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Have you ever been without food or drink for a whole day? Yes but it was when I was doing dope. I've been clean for 4 years.

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Girls don't like it when guys look at their ass as they're walking by. But then they rush out to buy shorts with a word plastered across their ass...what's up with that? Its a game, they act like they don't like you looking at their ass. What you thing thats the only thing they have to wear?

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Is it possible that other people can suck our energy and leaves us drained. All things are possible. Even the impossible.

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What makes people take pleasure in creating problems for others and/or putting them down? Some people are sicker than others.

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Come alittle closer, let me whisper in your ear. What did you hear me say? Nothng but the goosebumps I like.

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Top 3 pains you ever felt? Scrached cornea Broken heel Paper cut

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The last time you said, "Wow that was close", What were you close to? The police pulling me over for speeding. They sped off past me, lights flashing siren blairing.

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What would not be a good item to hang from your rear view mirror? Your weed

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Why do cats always go to the person who likes them least? Always is a big word. Are you sure you know how to use it. Its called free will.

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Im 15 and im thiking of suicde i lost my dog i had for 13 years and now i feel soo alone i wish she could come back and i feel like theres no reason for me to live now what should i do Lots of people thing about suicide. Try thinking about something positive when these thoughts surface, don't dwell on them. You can't choose what thought might come in your head but you can choose not to dwell on that thought and choose to think about something else, fond memories of your lost dog. Have you thought about looking for a new dog?

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What is your oldest memory? My Dad carying me down some steep steps when I was barly 2.

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What's something you tie? A T-shirt. Tie Die

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What is the most priceless moment in your life? Life as a whole is priceless. Moments fly by, we all live in the moment weather we like it or not.

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Would you rather be stomped by an elephant or sit in a pool of acid? What kind of acid and how big would the pool be. If we are talking LSD no thanks. No more Flashbacks for me.

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You cannot "unknow" what you know. Would you like to? I forget stuff all the time? I'm trying to figure out how to remember not to forget. I do not regret my past nor wish to shut the door on it.

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Do you dress up when you go to a fancy restaurant? No, I'm from Ft. Lauderdale, as long as you have on flip flops and a shirt you can get in almost anywere.

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Have u ever lost ur wallet to a pickpocketer? No! but i've been mugged and had my wallet ripped off with my pants pocket.

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What's one thing some people do, that makes them forget about everything, that makes them feel "free"? Meditation not to be confused with medication

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Do you try to buy products made in USA when you are out shopping? Yes, sometimes its hard to find made in USA products. For example I was in Target looking for a set if knifes. I couldn't find a set made in USA The most expensive set there was a German brand but it was made in China. I did find a set at a flea market made in USA. The set was about thirty years old and cuts well.

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Do you ever regret posting any questions on AB? Yea, I have a few people take a few questions the wrong way and give me some negative feedback. I was kind of making fun of evolution, talking about what a bird must have been thinking about before he developed wings. You know making plans to develope hollow bones and feathers so one day me might be able to fly through the air and catch bugs. That question was labled nonsense and actually banned.

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When you drive in an underwater tunnel. . . . .do you get a "RUSH"? Only if i'm smoking crack.

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Can the heat make you go crazy, because I spent too much at WAL-MART today and my "hubby" is going to bitch at me! So. . . . . .could I claim temporary insanity on the HEAT???????????? It's TOO FREAK'N HOT TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What's my chances? If your hubby bitches at you for spending to much time in Wal-Mart, maybe he should geet a grip.

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Are you tired of waiting? I know i am! I can't stand it when I have to wait on my check when i'm ready to leave, I don't care how well you served me make me wait and you blew it, cause I tip well when I get good service.

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Cooking or cleaning up? There is never a dirty dish in my sink more than five,ten min. tops. I get a fork dirty I wash it then. No soaking, no, through it in the dishwasher. I have never used my dishwasher. I would rather clean up twenty small messes than on big one. I love to cook breakfast, I'm a morning kind of person. Drink coffee, cook, listen to the radio, and through darts while checking the weather on...

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Would your ideal home be on a beach or in the mountains? On a mountain, above the beach.

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There is talk of using filtered used vegetable oil in diesel engines. If it is really workable, then why is it not very popular? There isn't enough used vegtable oil to run the country but there are plenty of tallow companies that recycle what restraunts through out.

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Have you ever heard anyone say: "I do not want to be a millionaire because I do not want to pay the high taxes?" Do you think taxation of the wealthy destroys incentive? Why or why not? Give me a million dollars i'll be glad to pay the taxes on it.

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Answer to:
What is the cheapest and strongest material you can use to build a house? Ice blocks.

Answer to:
If you were a flying elephant whos head would you poop on first? The ones who keep making our deficit go up.

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Answer to:
If I got you a flock of sea gulls for your birthday, would you be happy? Yea, front row center? What time are you picking me up?

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Answer to:
What movie have you seen more than any other? How many times have you seen it? Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas 100 times

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Answer to:
Do you a bad scar? If so how did you get it? I have a scar on my back from being ran over by a truck while cycling.

Answer to:
What is the wildest tattoo you have ever seen? Who was it on? A vulture with a hypodermic needle in its claws with blood dripping out the end. Saw it on a biker who was stoned at a rock quary that landed a 3and1/2 from about 80 feet high. This dude dives like an olympian diver.

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Answer to:
What comes to your mind when I say Starbucks? Over priced cup of coffee.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Sitting on a bus or train, the person next to you suddenly starts singing loudly - would you join in...? If it was David Lee Roth singing Girls Girls Girls, hell yes.

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Answer to:
When is a good time to fight for what you believe in? when you a not on camera

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Answer to:
Something you'd find in a closet. Marian Barry smoking crack.

Answer to:
These boots are made for walking .... comments please! Video link below! giddy up little doggie

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Answer to:
I like my women like I like my _____, _____ and _____ Dogs harry and stinky.

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Answer to:
Have you ever seen someone and could not decide if it was a girl or guy? I just did. And I still cant tell.... Yea you talking about my buddy Pat?

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Answer to:
Name something that only comes out at night! Ha! Ha! Ha! Vampires

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If you could only watch 5 t.v shows for the rest of your life what would you choose? Underdog. Andy Grifith. The Munsters. Beverly Hillbillys. The Price is Right.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What is your favorite line from the movie Good Will Hunting? Like apples? I got her phone #. How you like them apples?

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If I were to give you 5 dollars, what would you do with it? Buy you an ice cream cone.

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Answer to:
What is the sexiest cartoon character Don't forget about Wilma, I like em a little primative.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
I got a brilliant idea! I know how to stop childhood obesity! On new years eve we should blow all the McDonald to pieces! Would this be too mean for fat kids around the America? Would you miss eating there? Have you gone postal? Thats a horrible idea.

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What Girl Scout Cookies do you love? And can you buy them now in your area? Some more ass is my favorite and you can buy that flavor ice cream.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What's one example, where smaller is better? Small yard, that is if you have to cut it

Answer to:
How do you potty train a 5 year old dog, that we just adoopted? Read Dog Training For Dumbies.

Answer to:
Do you see the glass as half full, half empty, or completely shattered? Doesn't matter what i see, its just an illusion

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Have you found your place in this world, where you are happy and settled in, and everything works for you? Yes, my front porch without my cell phone, drinking hot coffee, early morning, cool breeze.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you enjoy doing laundry? Yes clean clothes are a must.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What might get anchored? A person can be well ancbored.

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What is you favorite one liner in the movie or book Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas? Did you see what God just did to us!!!

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Do you think "they" might as well create a super computer and call it "God"? What makes you think there isn't someone out ther that has called a super computer god?

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What is Grace? Pure unconditional love.

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Answer to:
Can you actually sell your soul to the devil? Yes but most people simply hand it over.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Whats the first thing you would buy if you won 25 million $? Plane ticket.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
I say Gunshot; You say...? Shotgun?

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What is something someone's forced you to do?* Wear a set of hand cuffs.

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Answer to:
I like philosophy, what book might you suggest to me? Proverbs

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the best children's book ever written? Winney the Pooh.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
I need help to DUPLICATE a text book, How should I do this? Wiggle your nose.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Can you write a funny poem about death? Take a breath from the depths. The ocean is blue and so are you.

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Answer to:
If you met someone who told you they didn't have a belly button, would you assume they were a liar? No they might have two of three of em.

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Would you work for the usa military if you had to? What makes you think we all aren't working for them but just don't realize it.

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If you were to DUPLICATE any event in history, what would it be? I would rebuild the great wall of China but between Mexico and USA.

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Answer to:
How do i get money quick? Drive as fast as you can to the ATM if you don't have any money in the bank, ram the ATM with you car, grab the money and flee.

Answer to:
What might someone try to hide? An erection.

| 4 people like this

Answer to:
Where do painful feelings come from? If I knew that I'ld be a rich man traveling the world not sitting at the house messing with Answer Bag.

Answer to:
What's one way to get attention? Get naked and go to the strip mall.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
What might someone twist? Someones neck off

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If you could knit something from steel wool what would you make? A chastity belt

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
If you were going to be eaten, how would you like to be served? desert

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How loud do you listen to your music while driving? What I CAN'T HEAR A THING, SPEAK UP1

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Answer to:
Whever i have a house party, my cat Judy always steals the limelight, what should i do? Throw her out da house.

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My friend did a poo, denied it, and everyone thought it was me, im apprehensive to confront her...what should i do? Poo on you boo hoo!

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Answer to:
Do you value logic or emotion? What makes you assume that I hold value for anythng at all.

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I'm in the waiting room at the doctor's office. The nurse comes in and says "the doctor will see you now." Do you think he likes me?;-) I'm hearing wedding bells.

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Answer to:
Are lady-farts more fragrant than man-farts? Only if you spray em with air freshener.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Do you think that half the time, you are wasting your time? No, i'm still in denial.

Answer to:
What happen on the happiest day of your life The sun both rose and set.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Where does personal interest stop and common interest begin? With the not so almighty dollar.

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Answer to:
Have you ever been driving on the interstate and seen a guy maturbating while driving? Was that you?

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Despite all our rage, are we still, just rats in a cage? Nope I'm a rat on the loose. Catch me if you can. Not.

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Answer to:
Your Boss is___________? God

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Ants often invade picnics,how would you invade an ants picnic? Raid!!!!!

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Who created the "why did the chicken cross the road" jokes? Well i'm kind of sure it wasn't the chicken.

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Answer to:
It does not pay to ________? Loose your money at the dog track.

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How far can you spit? From the top of the empire building all the way down to the bottom

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Answer to:
What, often slips your mind? Pay my taxes

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What might make a sudden loud sound, and startle you? lightening

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Who wears a hat on the job? Clown

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When someone is in a coma and dying were is their mind and what are they thinking? Are they in a painless circling patern waiting for heavens door to open or what? They think good thoughts.

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Does anyone know what K I S S stands for? keep it simple stupid. its an aa saying.

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Answer to:
Why isn't there a website named "how to leave society" I'm sure you can find a way to tollerate society enough so that you can smile from time to time.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Im curled up on the sofa on my own, which film do you recommend I watch that will make me smile? Along came Polly

Answer to:
When you boil a lobster,can you hear its screams? Only if your a good listener.

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Answer to:
How do you train your dog not to run out of the yard? I use a shock collar, when my dog gets so far from this little pod thing i've got plugged up in my laundry room it starts beeping and then it shocks him. Works great all you got to do is plug it in. Pet Smart has em.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Why is it that you get 255 characters to write a question but you get a 1000 for a comment or answer Who cares i'm not going to read something that long on here anyway.

Answer to:
Can you see how too much thinking could get in the way of learning? I think so?

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Answer to:
What is in your mouth right now? A Cavity

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What would be the worst job to go to in a pair of flip flops? Astronaut

Answer to:
I need a new hobby....any suggestions? Have you tried Answer Bagging

Answer to:
Where is some place that you would enjoy a cup of coffee? Fron or back porch.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What are some things that would be totally useless when cutting down a tree? A butter knife, and roller skates

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Would you like me to braid your hair for you today? I'm bald what kind of hair are you talking about?

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Which team would win in a fight: Harry, Hermione, and Ron OR Ash, Misty, and Brock OR Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli? The team with the best weapons.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
First thing that comes to mind when you hear the word "dome?" crome

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Who do you feel sorry for? Idiots

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
You just figured out your a mind reader, whos mind will you first read? Why? The black jack dealer in Vegas

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What can't you trust anyone to do? Pay your taxes

Answer to:
What color, catches your eye the fastest? Red and Blue. That is when they flash.

Answer to:
Can you name something that is endangered? Stuff made in USA

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Answer to:
What's one thing that is imported? imports

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What might someone hold? You better not be holdin.

Answer to:
What can get Stiff? A stiff gets stiff. Dead stiff that is.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is something known for being water tight? Frogs poop shoot.

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Answer to:
Have you ever noticed that any time you respond to a question involving atheists, you get points knocked off? They seem so unhappy. Yes my question was flagged nonsense that had to do with what a bird might be thinking about before he was a bird. Like I need to come up with some good tunes to attract the ladies, develope some hollow bones and feathers you know stuff like that. Didn't go over to well. Watch the movie expelled and see if any of those guys are friendly, that take stuff very personal.

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Answer to:
One wish in one word? Peace

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Whats at the end of the universe because even nothing is something I have never been there myself but if I hear of anyone who has i'll let you know.

Answer to:
When is it not a good time to be wearing a Life Preserver? while scuba diving

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Answer to:
I hate working , i mean i HATE working , how can i make money and be lazy at the same time? suck it up, no one like a cry-baby

Answer to:
If humans evolved from monkey's/apes, why are they still here? God made humans.

Answer to:
Why don't stores give you a choice to buy made in usa Try going to target and buying a culinary set thats american made.

Answer to:
What is the craziest way you have ever lost a tooth I fell into my trunk when I was two, my tooth sucked back up in my head, to later grow back out to my Mothers amazment

Answer to:
How do you get vitamin d from the sun All you got to do is step outside.

Answer to:
What comes to mind when you hear or see the word cockroaches? Raid!!!!!!

Answer to:
Im super pissed off, any good ways to calm down? Get some endorphines going, run.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Name something that might 'serve me right'. A Dutch maid.

Answer to:
What would you do if you saw your very own image in your french toast? sell it on ebay I look like Brad Pitt.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
I'm not big on games but iI do like to play a good game of________. Othello

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What's something you would drink through a straw? No brain freeze for me thank you

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What would be the worst item to forget in a pocket when doing laundry? winning lottery number

| 10 people like this

Answer to:
If you're happy and you know it _______(what?) then your face will surely show it if your happy and you know it clap your hands.

| 6 people like this

Answer to:
Are right handed people more clever than left handed people? No left handed people are less cleaver than right.

Answer to:
I am a superhero, my name is SUPER ________________ and I fight against ______________________! Captain Damnit Man and I fight against Dr. Asshole and Fridgid Bitch

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Have you heard of a strange way of getting rid of warts that works? I had some big warts vanish from my hand overnight without leaving any scars, i'm talking over twenty warts gone. I dropped some wart medicine that I didn't even have time to use and it broke, I knew my mom would kill me the next day when she found out. I guess I was so scared they vanished.

Answer to:
Have you ever heard of a strange way to get rid of the hickups that works? If you tell someone that you'll give them a dollar if they can hickup again, 9 times out of 10 they can't hickup again.

Answer to:
What is something specific you can recognize just by the shape of the bottle it comes in? Grolch Beer

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What do you lack on? money

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Birds poop on your car, birds poop on you. Do they do that on purpose? yes I know someone who can make his bird poop on command

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
If you could create a job with pay for yourself what would it be take people on adventures that don't have the money to do so.

Answer to:
If your Stereo came alive and said " Im ready to Jam what song should we start off with ? " What would you say? I wouldn't say anything. I always ignore things that talk to me such as my furniture and electronic gadgets

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Is dancing around in your underwear when your home alone wrong? Yes! You should take them off immediately.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What misbehavin' do you hope to do this weekend? what ever it may be i'll try to mend my way and behave inbetween misbehavin

Answer to:
Why do people lie when the truth would be 1000 times better because they suffer from mental illness

Answer to:
Do you know anyone who has traded money for sex some people do it without even knowing it

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Some things invented in the usa car, tv, telephone, computer, blue jeans, baseball caps, t shirts, and tennis shoes. do you know of anything mostly made in the usa crystal meth is about the only thing still made in the usa

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Answer to:
If you were Peter Piper what would you pick grapes

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Answer to:
If you could be any color in the rainbow what color would you be eggplant purple

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If you could make a toast in front of the whole world what would it be FRENCH TOAST

Answer to:
What never seems to stop moving? constant

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What usually cannot be fixed, once damaged? broken heart

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What have you used your coffee mug for? kill a roach

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How many fish are in the sea enough to keep putting money in Mr. Gordon pocket for a long time.

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What, of yours, would you never let someone borrow? my dog

Answer to:
What is something that has bars? burbon street

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the funniest joke in the world The jokes on us, it was made in china

Answer to:
What is the first word that comes to your mind using the first letter "F"? fartfertnoogen

Answer to:
What kind of body would you want your prospective mate to have? my body

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What, that would fit, do you wish was in your pocket? hope diamond

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
If I could be warden of a prison for one day I would make the prisoner________. write letters of appology to their mothers.

Answer to:
If I could be warden of a prison for one day I would make the prisoner________. cool

Answer to:
What city has the lowest unemployment rate in the usa? Greenville, SC.

Answer to:
What might you see at a fair? freaks

Answer to:
How can you tell if someone is lying when face to face with them lips moving

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How can you tell if someones on drugs are their pupils big or small can't tell by asking they are sure to lie about it

Answer to:
What is the best taisting heirloom tomato out the one on my sandwich

Answer to:
What is something that would NOT be very good on a sandwich? my next door neighbor

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is something that would NOT be very good on a sandwich? poop

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Do you have a tattoo? What is it of and where on your body is it? no but if I did it would be my name on my fore head i think everyones names should be on there forehead because my memory sux

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What makes you smile instantly? Open that coat if you want to see a joke

Answer to:
Craziest thing you have seen a drunk do Me and my brother watched a guy in Pensicola mow down some tomb stones in his car driving through a graveyard

| 4 people like this

Answer to:
If you had to eat the same thing every day what would it be meat and potatoes. girl that just makes me happy.

Answer to:
What is the first food that comes to mind that begins with the letter "w"? watermelon

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
What is something that might have a curve? look in the mirrow if you ain't got no curves might need to eat something

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
In a movie theator what armrest is yours Neither one they both belong to the movie theater.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is someting besides sex that satisfies a women? money

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Has God ever spoken out loud to you if yes what did He say? Yes, He said, Do the next right thing.

Answer to:
Instant hole. What comes to mind when you think of or what would be a use for instant hole? if you don't have a rock handy to crawl under then you could jump in your instant hole to avoid embarrasment

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
If you were to win the lotery what big item would you first purchase 69 ss camaro

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Who is the greatest man who ever lived? Jesus

Answer to:
What would you expect someone rich, might have? a good lawyer to get his behind out of the fire that his mouth got him in

Answer to:
What fad do you hate the most? pants sagging

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? 2 damn many

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
What invention do you think is the greatest of all? Why do you think that? cool breeze on a hot day

Answer to:
Is it just me or is it cheaper to eat out five dollar foot long

Answer to:
Whats the dirties job you ever had to do crawl around in poo and fix a septic line that had been severed for weeks.

Answer to:
If we are in such a threat of our oceans rising then why are we still building on the beach for the same reason that drug addict keeps doing the same thing over and over again insanity.

| 2 people like this