Answer to:
Have you ever wanted to share something you found online, but held back because that would say something about your search habits? yes, most definitely. At work I had a series of really cute family bath time pics but didn't show them around out of fear that my colleagues would realise i found them with the search term 'pre-pubescent kids in the bath'.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you read fiction? No, I prefer made up imaginative writing.

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if you saw someone you dont like drowning what would you do? Jump in and cut his penis off. (If it's a woman, both her tits)

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Do you think modern buildings should go back to making fire escapes outside of buildings ? No, because fires are always inside so whats the use of having an escape route where there will never be a fire? It's like putting prisoners the wrong side of the wall.

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What would be your first line of defense if attacked by a gang of midgets? Pitbull terriers

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WHERES THE SAFEST PLACE TO STAB SOMEONE in a hospital

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Could a government exist whose only source of money is limited, voluntary donations from individuals? No, don't be such an idiot.

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Has your privacy been invaded? Yes, aliens broke into my toilet while i was doing a poo

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Do you find texting lingo annoying? No, it just makes me angry

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Do you want to be like your parents? No, they're both dead.

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What ordinary item might also work very well as a self-defense weapon? A tissue

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I'm gonna be your __________ . toilet

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Can a straight guy fond of laying his hand or arm on another man's shoulder? No way!!! That's definite no, no for a straight guy! In the June edition of Scientific America they actually stated that this is one of the earliest 'gay' moves. i'm sorry to tell you but it seems you may be 'GAY'!

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Am I tho only one who refuses to read answers in all CAPS? NO, I DO TOO

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In this world of instant gratification, why doesn't God answer us on demand? He doesn't have an email account

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In this world of instant gratification, why doesn't God answer us on demand? He doesn't have an email account

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When you die, what will people remember you for? for using, random commas

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My boyfriend got his exgirlfriend a job working with him and he didnt call me for 5 days stating he was mad at me. Was he cheating? If he was cheating it's because you was not giving him what he needs. The cheater is never the guilty party... we cheat because of neglect. It's your fault if he did, but i don't know if he did and so maybe you're innocent.

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please suggest how to increase the height cut your legs off at the knees.... then everything around you will look bigger.

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Do you have plenty of ammunition? did have but now it's a sticky mess all over my dogs face.

| 1 person likes this

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True or false -Our bodies were designed to last a great deal longer then they do. It is we who shorten it!? you can't shorten the body unless you remove the bones... and who does that at home?

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Why was Christ crucified actually? because he was Christ

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If you have nothing to say, __________________. say it

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Why does a steel nail sink but a steel boat float? because the nail is heavier than the boat.

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how often should a grandparent help out with, or babysit thier grandchildren? What is normal? you gotta accept YOU'RE the mother and if you don't have time for your own kids (or need a break from them) then you should maybe think of putting them into a government home, and in this particular case I think it is probably the best thing for them.

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What is something you would find in a hardware store? Normally some imbecile that serves you. I don't know why, but assistants in these kind of places are always a little backwards. (Not the proprietors... just the employees!)

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Most men dislike................? bald headed, bearded women.

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What's the longest you've gone without showering? [honest!] 3 years... though I did use deoderant.

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When is the best time to send a cow to slaughter? Just before the divorce is finalised... that way you get to keep everything.

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With all the current job losses are you seeing any new homeless people in your area? Are you suggesting holmeless peopole have no money? that's just bizarre.

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Do you get anxious or nervous when you start a new job? Yes, severely. It's not unusual that I lose control of my bowels on the first day. I go prepared now.

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If you had a choice, what state would you live in permanently? A drunken, drug-induced state. (Washington)

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We are nothing without _ _ _ _ _ _. everything.

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Is it really illegal to take a dump on someone while they're sleeping? It was just a practical joke but now I'm being summoned to court I've done that before.... my mother was furious! As long as you don't touch them in any physical way it's perfectly acceptable... & don't worry (we all do it.)

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Many cops argue that it is important to give speeding tickets because speed the leading cause of accidents. How can it be that driving 65 is safe but 66 is not safe? How can such a generalization be accurate? Most cops hava also been lobotomized... I wouldn't take much notice. Drive as fast as you like... just be careful if you're too drunk.

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What comes to mind when i say "wrapping"? 2Pac... East Coast... West Coast... Gangsta

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So if you were on a web site like this one...and kept seeing someone's answers and questions posted...and you really liked their answers and questions ..and their personailty would you pursue something more with them? friends? numbers? send them erotic comments... gradually becoming more & more perverse. If they like you in the same way... they'll respond.

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For Pro-Choice Ab users....we live in the United States and we all have the right to choose what we believe...but I would like to know.at what point in pregnancy do you think is too late to have an abortion? It's never too late. As long as it's done before the age of 4 (before schooling starts.)

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Did you have any Teeth taken out or do you still have the full set...? I've three teeth left.

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How do you feel about reality tv? It's completely false.

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Why guys wear earrings, these are girls things, what you think? men have been wearing earrings a lot longer than women.

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How has Richard Wagner's music influenced popular music? It's the father of extreme right skinhead noise.

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Are their any particular people (top one or two) in your past that you despise? Why? For instance, if you were to give an award acceptance speech who would you specifically say "I do not thank ______" to? My wife... I hate her!

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What is something that tastes good with mustard? Chocolate biscuits

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Answer to:
Since France gave us the Statue of Liberty, what would be an appropriate gift to give them in return? George Bush

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What sort of jewelry does a heterosexual man like to wear other than a watch? A clit-ring.

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What was your job 5 years ago? Gathering bums up off the street and chucking their soiled asses into jail.

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What is the most unfair reason for which you have ever lost a job? I was treading grapes and was fired for having "small toes"????

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Have you ever had a pet fish? what did you name him and how long did he live? Yes, I named him "Dinner". He was alive for about 2 minutes.

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Who is the most Attractive woman you know? Bob Hoskins.

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Have you ever hung anything from the rear view mirror of your vehicle? Yes, a dwarf.

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If you could tell anybody in the world that you love them and you miss them, who would it be? George W Bush... failing that, Skippy the Bush Kangaroo.

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What is the best thing about a guy? His funeral.

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What do you think about an AB convention? A meeting place once a year for any AB'ers interested in meeting in person. You're joking aren't you... ABer's are the slyest, vilest, sickest, most depraved pathetic untrustworthy double-headed snakes that have ever had the misfortune to see light. What would it be... champagne and knives in the back?

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Why do people type thanx instead of thanks? It's just one more letter. Thanx @ thanks x. I'm too tired...

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Why do people type thanx instead of thanks? It's just one more letter. No it's not. Thanx compared to Thanks x is 2 letters & 1 space less . If it was 3 letters less it could be Thanksex.

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Welcome to the jungle ___________? If you had left that as a statement we would all have understood. You know where you are? You're in the jungle, baby... you gonna die...

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Who else loves hunting but me. Yes, I would hunt anything but you.

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Name something you buy that is almost always white? Coca cola?

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What was the name of the Martin Scorcese film which portrayed a family of Italian lobsters? better now... thank god for the 'edit'.

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What are the six pieces used in a game of chess? six pawns.

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Name something you buy that is almost always white? wedding dress... bandages (though many times there's not much different).

| 1 person likes this

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How close are we to medical technology that will render humans nearly immortal (except for deliberate murder/suicidce, fatal accidents, and the like)? Quite far... we can't even cure the common cold yet!

| 1 person likes this

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If I want to change my car's engine oil by myself, what tool do I need to get? Can you list it all, thanks. If you have to ask, the only tool you need is a mechanic.

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How do you start feeling comfortable around new people when you're a shy person? I'm afraid the answer lies in alcohol... hit the bottle.

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What is the secret to winning on the slot machines in a casino? Stay home! loll Own them.

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Do you have pictures of your family and friends on your walls? No. I bought the house to keep them out!

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How are you supposed to cuddle when you're worried about your breath? head to toe... as long as your feet are more supportable than your breath.

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Why do men like to put women down sometimes? It's to bring them to their level.

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Have you ever peed your pants after the age eight? No, but I peed somebody elses.

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How to came mailsex warker profation I have never read such senseless English... I'm sure you didn't even need to try.

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Does high school fly by fast? Not if you're a teacher, no.

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When you are sad, what are you doing? Looking in the mirror.

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I love you, you love ____________? cheat.

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What is something fun to do only half naked? give birth.

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Where are all the cool people at? Answerbag seems a barren wasteland this time of night. ;) They're on their way... don't fret... ;)

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On a scale of 1-10, How well do you like your S/O's cooking? 10... when she sticks to ready-made microwave meals.

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Jews say that women & kids killed in Gaza are collateral damage.Isn't it ok then to say gas chambered jews who were killed in WW 2 are also collateral damage. Sounds fair enough eh ? If it's good for one then it should be good enough for the other. You're confused. You seem angered by the first statement and yet you are in agreement with it. Your terms of sgreement are "it's fair enough... good for one good for the other.." You're trying to make a point and you're making it badly.

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When I get an erection my penis becomes (even) smaller. Does anyone else suffer from 'shrinkage' in this way? Is it common? You pathetic idiot... get a life TROLL!

| 2 people like this

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Have you lost your mind? Mine's misplaced... its somewhere up my arse. If I had lost it how would I be able to tell you where it is?

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Do you massage your partner? Yes. She enjoys a good SMS.

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How long have you and you s/o been together? We've been working our way towards a bitter divorce for over 8 years now.

| 1 person likes this

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What's the difference between forgiving and forgetting? When you forget it's because you're senile; when you forgive it because you're stupid.

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Have you ever helped someone when no one was looking? No, what would be the point in that? One wouldn't get any kudos... and we all know, the most important thing is POINTS. Ps: I wouldn't even help if the entire world was watching. People should keep their problems to themselves and stop being so selfish.

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I'm 6ft+... so why does my girlfriend keep saying I'm too small? Actually she's a dwarf... which makes it all the more bizarre?!

| 1 person likes this

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Do you consider yourself middle class or which class would you put yourself in? Lowest of the low... I am an underclass all by myself.

| 1 person likes this

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What is the best book you ever read? Quick & Easy Indian Cooking, by Madhur Jaffrey. Though the Jalfrezi Chicken was a litle disappointing..

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Am I wrong to think that honesty is the basis of a relationship? You can be as honest as you like.... but if you've only got a 3inch plonker, you're f*cked (though not literally).

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Guys what looks sexiest on a gal....sexy lingere or just your tee shirt? Sister: T-shirt.... mother: lingerie.

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Are you over your ex, how long did it take and how do you know? Yes. It took 10 years of marriage and a divorve.

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WHY can't I ever get the dadblastit garbage bags open? STRESSES me out!!! put it in the microwave for 5 secs.

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How can a man determine whether a first date with a woman has gone well? if he wakes up next to her mother wearing a used condom?

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Can you describe yourself in one word? despicable

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What should I get my sports-loving boyfriend for a christmas/anniversary gift A tennis ball.

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Could you handle driving in the rain? As long as it wasn't wet.

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Answer to:
I am a 14 year old boy is there any other ways i can masturbate with out my hands. Have you got a dog? If not try asking your mom... if she loves you, she'll help?

| 1 person likes this

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Name a popular aphrodisiac? Celibacy... it's a sure fire way to have you thinking of nothing else.

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If you drink heavily for a year or so and then stop drinking, will your tolerance for alcohol decrease? (i.e. will it take less alcohol to get drunk now as opposed to the heavy drinking days?) I love it when alcoholics try to save money.

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I have a really pretty carved headboard and footboard that don't fit my bed, so I want to use them for some other purpose. What could I use them as, or make out of them? A headstone... though you'll have to treat the wood first.

| 2 people like this

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Should i be scared to give birth That depends what you're giving birth to.

| 3 people like this

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In one word, what is an emotion that you hope to experience today? doubt???

| 2 people like this

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Is an emotional affair better than, equal to, or worse than a physical affair? Why? Oh God! You've not fallen in virtual love have you?

| 2 people like this

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I can give............? good head.

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Do you think that you were an 'accident or 'prepared pregnancy? I still am.

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Do you complain about bad (slow, rude, inaccurate) service at restaurants or do you just never go back or both? I'm probably one of the few people who enjoy that. If the waiter also insults me.. well so much the better.

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Why would someone fall in love with you? If they were comletely psychotic... & stupid to boot.

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Hi can someone go to this link and tell me what type of guitar this is! i need to know the name! http://pt-br.tinypic.com/view.php?pic=r0qzio&s=5 Yes, thats whats called an 'electric guitar'. You can pick them up from any highstreet.

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Is it better to take an exam on an empty or full stomach? That depends if you are of a nervous disposition.

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Skirt with no panties: Hot or Trashy? I prefer it the other way around.

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Is penis size inherited? I hope not for my sons sake.

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My boyfriend just broke our fan on the hottest summer night by sticking a bottle cap into it to see how far it would fly. What is the stupidist thing your s/o has done lately? She burped during an important job interview and vommited down herself. 5 mins after regaining her composure she lost control control of her bowels... she left in total disgrace.

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Do the eyes have it? If you're talking about retina's, yes.

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I took a friend in who stayed for a month and offered to pay me 1/2 the rent went she got back on her feet. That was over a year ago and she won't even acknowledge oweing me. Nothing in writing - can I get the money based on her word? Do you physically have her words? Are they in your pocket and available to produce as evidence? If not, your screwed.

| 1 person likes this

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Is being a nurse a rewarding career? Not if all your patients keep dying, no.

| 2 people like this

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What relationship is there between television and adolescent depression? They get depressed if they don't have one.

| 3 people like this

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Where did you first kiss your wife/husband? On the lips... and then moved down.

| 2 people like this

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When was the last time you 'drew the short straw'? just over 4 years ago... I married the wrong sister.

| 2 people like this

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What is your best hiccup remedy? Hold your breath. After about 4 minutes you will hiccup no more.

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Would you complete this statement?: " I must remember ________________." to lift up the toilet seat before sitting down to drop a load.

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What part of _________________________ do you not understand? suck it bitch

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What is a word that means "playing the victim?" "acting the woman"

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I heard people can die from carbon monoxide poisoning. How do you do that when you have NO Garage door to shut and then start the car. again, just a question.. I had been wondering? You put a pipe from the exhaust through the window... you close the window as far as you can... if you want you can stuff an old rag or t-shit in the gap... turn the engine on and voilà... Carbon monoxide poisoning and the end to all troubles.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
What is an occupation where you are always meeting new people? A morgue technician... though the conversation is terrible.

| 1 person likes this

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What specific place would you hate to be during a major power failure? On AB, after having just typed my longest answer ever and a click away from posting it.

| 2 people like this

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How do i get rid of shoe odor in my linen cupboard Put a weeks dirty underwear in the bottom of the cupboard. After a few hours it will overpower the odour of shoes ... it works a treat.

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"Money" is the answer, What is the question? What is the first word of my question.

| 1 person likes this

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What is a name brand of Margarine? Flora

| 1 person likes this

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I just found hickey on my 14 yr old daughter. Any advice? Stop kissing her then.

| 1 person likes this

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What would be a good comeback after someone says you only have 5 friends? "I'd rather be lonely than be you."

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What's the meanest things you've said or done to a stranger? I convinced my best friends wife that he had cheated on her. After 22 years of marriage she left him and slept wife 3 of his friends. At that point I told her it had all be a joke and that her husband was innocent. It was a classic!

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Stevie Lobster, professor of genetic epidemiology at Oxford University, claimed this week that a clitoris is probably a very early incarnation of the penis. What are the implications of this? I never said "probably". I just relayed the words of Mr S. Lobster. It's he who phrased it in such a way. If we didn' wonder about tghe implications of ideas it would be a pretty boring world. The implications of what this man is saying are huge... have you thought for one minute what his idea entails. Why wonder what anything means????

| 1 person likes this

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How can you fix your relationship after your man lies to your face about doing drugs? is it worth it if he can lie looking right into your eyes? What drug? It makes a huge difference.

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My boyfriend calls me names like bitch,slut,whore,ugly,fat,skank,smelly,tramp,etc.But he says that he is just joking and he doesnt mean it.Well I dont take it as a joke,and I take very seriously.Do you think that Im overreacting?Would you take it as joke? I've just looked at your profile and I have to agree with your boyfriend. As he is telling the truth, yes, I think you are over-reacting. You should thank the stars you even have a boyfriend... it's quite surprising.

| 1 person likes this

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Why are republicans so stupid?? Is it because they are Christian? You can't blame God for this one! That's going too far.

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What is your favorite song that reminds you of your best friend(s)? 'Girlfriend in a Coma' - The Smiths

| 1 person likes this

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Anyone on here from London, England? How's the weather? Feb.2/2009 Terrible... did you need to ask.

| 1 person likes this

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What song is Jimi Hendrix most associated with? Bohemien Rhapsody

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Have you got a part of your body that is WAAAY bigger than it should be? My knees.

| 1 person likes this

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Complete this sentence: Nothing beats my mom's _______ technique for giving head.

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I need one point till i am level 20. point me 1 point for fun? There you go,my friend. Take care. +

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What song by the Beastie Boys do you like the most, and why? Bohemien Rhapsody

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What is one thing that people say is unappropriate but you think its totally normal? killing tramps.

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Sometimes it is hard to _______________? spell to.

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Answer to:
Do you mostly ask questions for points, information or fun? Fun. If I seriously wanted an answer to something I would research it myself.

| 1 person likes this

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Have you noticed that some user's email addresses or website addresses are not "clickable" on their public profiles? Is it because the entire address does not appear? Am I missing something? I edited mine so as it's unusable. I mentioned in an answer that I was famous and some people tried to discover my identity through my email.

| 4 people like this

Answer to:
What's not a good thing to bring work? A brain... it's generally frowned upon.

| 2 people like this

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Is it possible for a religion to become obsolete? Given enough time, yes. Be patient.

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Answer to:
I understand the historical and geographical reasons why some African-Americans speak with a recognizable accent--but why do some of African-Americans NOT? (Full disclosure, I'm Caucasian and something of a linguist.) If you understand the historical and social easons of why some do... you must also understand why some don't. You need to think of how a black man may reason, how he can really integrate and succeed under white authority - which has a history of biased and racist policies.

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IRA: good cause or bad cause? Good cause... British troops and police have commited atrocities over there. It is a very sad part of British history.

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Are you getting better looking as you age? Yes... as a kid I was a bald, beer-bellied, toothless lout with hair coming out my nose and ears... but i've blossomed into quite a handsome chap.

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We have a unisex bathroom at work.One of the guys, and we all know which one it is,doesnt wash his hands and he PEES on the seat!!! We have put up multiple signs above the toilet asking to put the seat cover up. He still doesnt. What do you do now. Pee on the floor so as next time he goes in he'll get his shoes wet. That should stop it.

| 1 person likes this

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What not to say to a police officer when pulled over? "Would you repeat that please officer?... I'm completely shit-faced"

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
Was the world ever on the brink of an apocalypse during the cold war? Yes, you should watch the documentary "The Fog of War" a film about the former US Secretary of Defense Robert McNamara... it's a fascinating document.

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How do know if you are ready to get married? When you are prepared to lose half of everything you have.

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Men - How would you describe the ideal woman? The perfect woman, that's a tough one.She would have to have the body of my best friend George but with my mothers head.

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Which Answerbag category do you feel that you should be the "Expert" in... even if somebody else already holds that honor? 'Complete nonsense' or 'retarded Aber's'

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We have 8 inches of snow,(uk)what weather have you in your country? Bright sunshine here in Lyon, France.

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How do you spell what? That all depends wot age you are.

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What is your initial reaction after a close friend of yours tells you that they are gay? Would you like me to give you a 'shiner'?

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Do you ever give yourself "points" in real life for genuinely using archaic or uncommon words in sentences? What are some examples? I'll give an example if this question makes no sense. Be damned whore of Satan... be away with ye.. far from yonder into thy bowels of the unholy guardians of the north... be away.. BE AWAY!!

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If you could go on a date with any figure in history, knowing it would be a one night stand, who would it be? Abraham Lincoln or Charles Darwin... I've always liked bearded women.

| 1 person likes this

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What do you think about now having a Creative Writing category under Writing? I'm excited! It should be the only category... there's not much that isn't ficticious on AB.

| 1 person likes this

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What advice would you give to an aspiring vegetarian? Preferably from other vegetarians who made the switch. Don't eat meat.

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Fellow men: How can i last longer in bed? Don't let him give you a 'reach around' while he's tunnelling you.

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What color is your underwear? Brown Y-fronts with white trim.

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Have you ever downrated a question so that your answer would be #1? Brown Y fronts with white trim.

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Answer to:
Which is better overall, Mac or PC? I prefer Mcdonalds... I've never tried the PC burger (or are they the ones made from soya?)

| 1 person likes this

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Should a women be strong? No, they're scary enough as it is.

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Once I ______. ( be original) I got married twice.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What makes everything better? A nice long pooh.

| 3 people like this

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Do you enjoy your significant other's company? No... it's like being in the same room as a She-devil.

| 1 person likes this

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How many pushups can you do? Only 2 now... I'm getting tired.

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What makes you cheat oh your partner? My complete lack of morality. Plus, cheating is COOL.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How many pushups can you do? 3

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I stopped wearing makeup, and now people say I look like a teenager (I'm in my mid-20's).. Advice? Drink heavily for six months... hat should do the trick.

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Whats going to happen after all the questions are answered? We'll start questioning the answers.

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How do I fix my wife's horrible constant attitude and yelling over every little thing? With a mallet.

| 1 person likes this

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What is your favorite drink? Freshly squeezed hamburger juice.

| 3 people like this

Answer to:
Would you ever sleep with your significant other's sibling? No, my sister would get jealous.

| 2 people like this

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What makes you annoying to other people? I breathe.

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How often do you watch porn? Every sunday with the family.

| 2 people like this

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My girlfriend likes to bite my penis. should i dump her? No! Just stop putting your penis near her face... she doesn't like it.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the greatest moral lesson that you have learned from reading the Bible? If you read books upside down and back to front... they make no sense.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you think you look attractive in photos? If it's very blurred I'm not too bad.

| 2 people like this

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Would you marry a tree? Why rude? And when did I knock my mother? Maybe I badly phrased my comment?

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Should i pierce my bottom lip? Your lips 'downstairs'?

| 4 people like this

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Being busty is important - do you agree? Not if you're a man, no.

| 2 people like this

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Valentines` day - who will you be doing? If i'm lucky it will be my sister... if not my mom again.

| 1 person likes this

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What is the one thing you like best about the human race? They don't live too long.

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Do you know where you're going to? Straight to Hell.

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Is it stupid to text a girl at 11:30pm just to say goodnight? It's pathetic... you wimp.

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What piece are you when you play Monopoly? Professor Plum.

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Are you a practicing Christian? Do you have to 'practice' to be a Christian? ...any cheats guide you could advise?

| 1 person likes this

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Why would someone always seem to be smiling? Because he/she is an imbecile. Imbeciles are always smirking...and it makes them look even sillier. I smirk all the time myself.

| 2 people like this

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I think we should be allowed to see those who give us negatives. So we can track down trolls. What say you? If someone dons their invisibilty cloak and dr's you without leaving a comment, it suggests that they are not able to justify or explain their motives. It's just ignorance. They impose their sense of morality and contradict any decent morals by sneaking away with the cheese. Yes, these people are rats and we need not bother with them.

| 1 person likes this

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Do great minds truely think alike? No. Here's a quote from Oscar Wilde: "I hate it when people agree with me... I feel I must be wrong."

| 1 person likes this

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Have you ever found anything with a metal detector? Yes. A few freaks and a community of retards. Those metal detector guys are something else!

| 1 person likes this

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What is a raw vegetable that people usually cook before eating? Hamburgers

| 1 person likes this

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What's your name? Stevie Lobster - 73

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Taking advantage of an opportunity is a good thing..being called an "opportunist" is not so good. Where is the line drawn between the two? That's a great question. I think the line is drawn at working to earn the opportunity. If you work hard at opening a door and finally get in off the back of those efforts it is quite different to lingering outside that door waiting for someone else to open it and sneaking in on their heels.

| 2 people like this

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Big Mac or Whopper? You can't beat a Mcdonalds Whopper.

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Are you a geezer? she's a geezer... yes.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you Think Marijuana Should be Legalized? Decriminalized? or do you believe in Nixon's war on drugs? It should be given away free in schools... and in eight years time legalized and taxed.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you judge people based on their use of poor grammar and spelling? Some of our greatest writers emploted editers for this. Spelling is just memory and grammar is acquired knowledge. Anyone who judges a person on such things are actually dispalying there own limitations.

| 1 person likes this

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I'm 30 and friends tell me it's too late to learn to play the electric guitar - am I really making an ass of myself by trying? No it's not too late... your fingers will noit be as supple and you'll probably have to improvise with certain chords... but it's not too late. Enjoy the pain of your first barre chords.

| 1 person likes this

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Would you marry a tree? Glad you liked that one Dave... but you still haven't answered it.

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Do you appreciate your friends? Not at all. Infact, I regularly stab them in the back and enjoy spreading vicious rumours around about them. Last week I convinced my best friends wife that he had cheated on her... she ended the relationship (after 22 years!) and slept with 3 of his friends for revenge. I enjoyed that one.

| 3 people like this

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How can i know my long distance man is being faithful? make him wear a spy-cam on his penis... you'll be able to see everything then.

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If a baby is born healthy with extra toes and/or fingers, should the extra digits be removed? This happened to my sister. She was born with 4 thumbs. My mom twisted elastic bands around them - stopping the blood flow - and they fell off after 2 weeks. It's the same method as removing a dogs tail.

| 1 person likes this

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I have seas but no water You also have words but no question.

| 2 people like this

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Do you take the simple and turn it into something complex? No, I do it the otherway around.

| 1 person likes this

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Why is it that men just love to talk with each other about fighting and their sexual escapades? The expression 'Cock of the roost' explains that.

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Why do I sometimes wake up in the morning and unexplainably vomit? Maybe you're sick of the world.

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Why is that fat lady looking in the dumpster? She's searching for cream-cakes.

| 1 person likes this

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How do you know if your in Love? Your eyes roll around involuntarily and a ridiculous grin manifests itself across your face.

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What is the best advice your mom ever told you? "put it in like this... move around a bit... oh, that's it... tongue in ear... yes, just like that... now bite my neck..."

| 1 person likes this

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What do u do if a close friend is a boy and ur a girl? Use him for practice.

| 1 person likes this

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What can you say back to a person that tells you that you're ugly? "Well then we've got something in common."

| 4 people like this

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Who are the elementals it's illiterate cheese from Switzerland.

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What's the most embarrasing thing you've ever caught your sister doing? Giving 'lollipop' to our brother.

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What is porn It's full of used goods... the pawn shop.

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My boyfriend and I are having a disagreement. Is it spelled evily or evilly? double L.

| 2 people like this

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Nunya just made it to Maestro. Care to join me in a big celebration? So soon! Well done Nunya.

| 3 people like this

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Me and my girl have sex everyday. the other day i couldnt get hard. this is driving me nuts. we had sex 5x since but i still think that im not going to be able to get hard the next time how can i get back on track and just have great sex again n not worry You have to improvise. A tip: glue the forskin closed and pee.

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Do you think I am ugly? My God!! The blind are lucky when it comes to you.

| 3 people like this

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How long should i ask for the truth until i give up? It sounds to me like you're terrorizing your girlfriend... She's INNOCENT, and if not it's probably your fault.

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How can I simplify: (x/x+8)/(x+8)+8? Why would you need to simplify that... it's a perfectly straight forward equation.

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If you had to lose one body part, which one would you choose? I pick my pinkie toe... My skin.

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Have you ever been within 5 feet of a cow? Yes, I was side by side with one at the altar.

| 1 person likes this

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Why does NUNYA always have to comment "+6 Great answer!" to everyone so that she can get points too (and its not even her own question that's asked)? Just curious. Nothing wrong with that... she gives regardless of receiving.

| 8 people like this

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What would you do if a shop worker gave back the wrong change to a blind person? Would you speak up for them or turn your head? ((For example, a blind person is due $30 and are only given $5)) A blind person would not need telling... they would feel the difeence immediately.

| 1 person likes this

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Are we having fun yet Give me 5 minutes and we will be.

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What is a kind of bird that you will see in the water? A floating one.

| 1 person likes this

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What do you wear when you want someone to notice you? A short skirt & heels.

| 4 people like this

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Whats the stupidest thing you did? Join Mensa

| 2 people like this

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When a person dies, and it's spirit leaves it's body, does it go looking for it's body? No, it's normally bloody relieved to have escaped.

| 2 people like this

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What sentence is unrelated to the topic and can be eliminated your one.

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What were you doing just before you got your last headache? giving someone else one.

| 2 people like this

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It's that time of the month, and as it just started the cramps are at their peak. I'm going to see a movie later and don't want to be uncomfortable. I took Midol about 2 hours ago, and the movie is in another hour. Is there anything else I can take? Keep your mind off it... It's just psychological. (Headache gets ready to dodge the bullets!) ;)

| 3 people like this

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Do plants get exercise? have you never heard of the 'runner bean'?

| 2 people like this

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Is there anyone here in there 30's and 40's ? Just curious. :o) No-one can be in both?!

| 10 people like this

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Should I spend $4.00 on Cigarettes or Cat Food? Smoke the cat and put the money in the bank. It's a no lose situation.

| 2 people like this

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I am purchasing a home from another person, they have been renting the home out for the past year. They gave the tanants 30 days notice, can i do anything if the tenants are not out. I don't know US property law... is 30 days enough? In most places in Europe for living tennants it is much longer. 30 days is not very long for a family to re-locate.

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If people fear ghost... do you know what ghost fear? Complete invisibility... there's nothing worse than being ignored.

| 3 people like this

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Is this ok ?last night my best friend came up to me and started kissing on my neck and kissing me while she has a bf I think you're daydreaming...

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Why do laundry baskets have holes in all the sides? I've been here... but I'm having trouble with my system. It is taking forever for a page to load - sometimes it never does. I've been running with no Anti-Virus software, and I think my computer has picked up a chest infection. That's what I get, hey? I've not seen you about for a few days... oh, I almost forget you was thinking about washing baskets, that's why!

| 4 people like this

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What can women do with their hands to let you know they're interested? Drag you home by the tie.

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What's the craziest fear [phobia] you've ever heard of? I have a friend who has a 'breast' phobia... he is afraid of breasts.

| 4 people like this

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Why do laundry baskets have holes in all the sides? Because if not it would be a trash can.

| 5 people like this

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The use of the word "Retard". Is this word a part of your vocabulary? If so, how do you use it...... Yes, I use it to justify lame answers. Excuse me, I'm a retard. No-one has EVER disagreed.

| 2 people like this

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I'm going to open an online AB store. What would you like the store to stock? Questions.

| 1 person likes this

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If you were to receive an award for "Greatest Guy/Gal in the World", would there be any reason you would refuse it? Yes, because it would have to have been a mistake.

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How old were you when you learned to tie your shoes? 25 but I had help.

| 2 people like this

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Is "j'parle francais" grammatically correct? No. Je parle français. You only make the liaso when je is followed by a vowel. J'aime...

| 3 people like this

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How do i block my phone thats bin stolen Is that Bin Laden's brother?

| 1 person likes this

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What can YOU do with a chicken? (Besides cooking it.) Stuff it.

| 1 person likes this

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Where is the worst place to sit in a restaurant? On the floor.

| 3 people like this

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Do you love ping-pong? Pocket or table ping pong?

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Could you forgive a pedophile for his/her crimes? I can't forgive anyone for their crimes... that's not my place. I could still treat him/her as a human being, yes.

| 1 person likes this

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Is i allways without exeption wrong to kill oneself? It's fine as long as you don't do it in public. (most things are)

| 1 person likes this

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Can the mother of the octuplets afford to raise 14 kids? What?! She's not pregnant with another six is she?

| 2 people like this

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"All Australians could be implanted with microchips within the next two generations".What are your feelings on this subject? Thats great... we can then set our GPS systems to avoid them (or hit them).

| 2 people like this

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Fill in the blank: I _____ that girl so hard 'googled'

| 1 person likes this

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For the past week my urine has been brown and my bowels are black . my stomache, liver and kidneys are hurting. i can't drink or eat anything without the pain worsening and my liver enzyme count is way too high, but the doctors don't know what's wrong. Refer to my website... "DIY liver transplants". It's not as complicated as you may imagine.

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Hey,Sodapop-wearing a COAT of Compassion just became a Mastero, congrates to him and his accomlishment. Yeah go bud! Congratulations... you're becoming a hero. +

| 5 people like this

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Anyone remember the group Groove Theory You've almost made a question there... well done. +4

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Puff the magic dragon lived by the see. In a little land of happiness, a land called____________... Arcadie

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My girlfriend just broke up with me. She says she still loves me but just needs time to herself, so I hardly get to see her any more. Should I try to stay with her or let her go? You've no choice... she's let you go. You should let the memory go... or preserve it in a nice way.

| 2 people like this

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What could I say to my 21 year old son who will not go to college? Put him back in diapers and enrol him in kindergarden.

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Would you change your beliefs for someone you love? Like, changing the way you live for them. Love IS a change of beliefs... we become each other. It's what happens when two people impress one another so much.

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Will there be a batman / superman movie? There probably will be if you've got anything to do with it.

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What would you think if you saw a piano suddenly start dancing? I'd think the pianist must have sent me into dreamland with his dull & monotonous playing.

| 1 person likes this

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Should we diet on Superbowl Sunday? I thibk you've accidently put a 't' on the end of die. Yes, we should.

| 1 person likes this

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Does any one know of a website that will tell you about the benifits of smoking marijuana? Smoke it, and then make your own website talking of the benefits.

| 3 people like this

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Do you believe in ghosts? Or, do ghosts believe in you? Which is it? I haunt myself, so I can only say "yes" to both questions.

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I am 15 and i want a dirt bike how can i get one if my mom wont get it for me? Do you know where she keeps her credit card? It's just an idea???

| 1 person likes this

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Who will be the next Genius here on Answerbag? What is there already one?

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What do you say to an eight year old who says 'I dont care' when you threaten to take away their most prized toys for being naughty? Keep the toys and put the kid on e-bay.

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Are you going to answer this question honestly?? Be honest!! I'd be lying if i said yes.

| 1 person likes this

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Look out of your kitchen/dining room window! What do you see & describe? There's a suspiscious ghostly figure with a big nose staring back at me.

| 1 person likes this

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If you could do or have anything in the world what would it be? commit suicide.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you think that you will ever become famous? I already am.

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What is the best way to get rid of moles? Slice them off with a razor.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you have to have a facebook account to get emails from facebook users saying they have added you to their friends? Yes, why? Are you a lonely guy pimping for friends?

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Has a homeless person ever approached you asking for food and then say all they want is the money when you offer to get them some lunch? I only ever give money if they say it's for alcohol.

| 2 people like this

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If you could do one thing before the age of 50, what would it be? die.

| 1 person likes this

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Describe somebody Famous.......... in five words and lets see if we can Guess who it is...? heroin... crack cocaine... pork pie hats... Kate... Tabloids.

| 4 people like this

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I can't hardly breath and I'm light -headed. Am I having heart attack? Probably... I you have a good one you'll come around after a couple of hours with blue lips. If you have a bad one well... adieu. Maybe your last +5, cherish it.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you think its wrong that my last account got banned because an american misunderstood my question? Surely you can not get banned for one question? Are you sure that was the reason?

| 1 person likes this

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What is another word for woman? A triple headed sea-slug.

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Could you sleep for 24 hours? No, 10 hours is the maximum. After this the brain shrinks and starts bleeding... 24 hours would mean almost certain death.

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Why are roses red? Many aren't.

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How many languages do you speak? And which language would you most like to learn? Why? French, russian, Latin & Spanish. First language latin 14-16.

| 1 person likes this

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Have you ever experienced total and uncontrollable grief? urinals.

| 1 person likes this

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What would I call my wife's brother's wife's sister? a future possibility.

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What quality do you think people find interesting about you? My care and concern for people with disabilities.

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Give me some +ratings or il shoot ya There you go my friend. +5

| 2 people like this

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Do you think blackouts are fun? Yes... there's nothing better than blacking out after a good night on the liquor.

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I went to a funeral and people were laffing when the son said his mother was loving and generous, we all knew her as a stingy bitch is that wrong to laff? Of course it's not wrong to laugh... funerals are great fun. I can't wait until my grandma kicks the bucket (she's 98)... fingers crossed.

| 1 person likes this

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How important to you is it that your Mother likes, or at least approves of, your partner? As my mother is MY partner... it's very important.

| 1 person likes this

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How do people live in places where the temperature is constantly below zero? Do you stay outside much, or do you stay indoors with the central heating? And what type of clothes do you wear inside? We f*ck a lot.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you speak in metaphors? Whats a metaphor? is it like an auditorium?

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How do stupid people make it through life? Are you looking for advice?

| 2 people like this

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What`s the gayest name you can think of? Pearly Spencer.

| 3 people like this

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What do you fear more than anything? getting pregnant (I'm male)

| 2 people like this

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What would be the funniest thing you could say at an interview? Do you have a tissue? ...I've just shit myself.

| 1 person likes this

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Ever Danced with Death...? Still dancing....

| 4 people like this

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Did you graduate high school a virgin? no, I dropped out pregnant.

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Where do you do your best thinking at? court

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Is a square a kind of rectangle? No, a square is a straight circle.

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What's Alternative about your Lifestyle...? My lover and my wife... I alternate between the two.

| 2 people like this

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Have you ever kissed a frog [or any other animal,creature,amphibian etc.] , hoping he/she would turn into a handsome prince? Well, my wifes french... does that count?

| 1 person likes this

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I'm ugly and I want to know the truth concerning the people on average who are ok with it or have a problem with it. Thoughts? Yes you are... hard luck.

| 2 people like this

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I have a curved penis it curves down, will it be harder for me to get my wife pregnant? Well, you're the first man in history who gets downward erections... Yes, it will be extremely difficult to get your wife pregnant with that.

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If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be? A bonzai tree.

| 3 people like this

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What is one thing that a midget could not do? be allowed on a rollercoaster.

| 2 people like this

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Apparently god wears clothes (Isaiah 63:3). What type of clothes do you think he wears? Lace panties and a Wonderbra.

| 1 person likes this

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Parents: How would you feel if you found out that your daughter's life ambition is to become a stripper? I would stop giving her money to spend on clothes... well, she won't need them.

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Who is the first famous person you remember dying during your life? Mine is Princess Diana. The late great Sidney Vicious.

| 1 person likes this

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Are you alone with your nickname or someone is sharing it with you on AB? There's many different Headaches... but I'm the worst.

| 1 person likes this

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What is any item or items a woman might carry in her purse? A dildo.

| 2 people like this

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A woman in California gave birth to octuplets and she's planning on breast feeding. Your thoughts? Do you mean shes got eight breasts? that's just bizarre!

| 2 people like this

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Would Margaret Thatcher have any advice for Dubya and McCain on how to deal with near-future gangs of neo-con back-stabbers? Yes, she would advise them to wear re-inforced metal-wire knickers... pulled up to the neck.

| 1 person likes this

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Is the mind really a muscle? Does exerciseing it make you smarter? What is a good exercise for it? Does your brain get a 'hard-on'? No. Then it's not a muscle. Stupid people can do as many brain exercises as they like... but they're only going to get more stupid with time.

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Mrs Cleaver has become a maestro. Who would like to join me at a Leave it to Beaver party in her honour? Another scalp Mrs Cleaver.. you'll have to sharpen that blade soon.

| 6 people like this

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Have you ever petted a cow? Yes, and it didn't stop there.

| 2 people like this

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Why can't i be ok with my husband being friends withhis first? That's normal... not everyone has this problem, but enough. I can't answer why... I don't say it's a good thing... but it exists and there's not much that can be done about it. People will tell you you're insecure ... that's just a very easy response.

| 1 person likes this

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Fill in the blank: Jesus' love is_________. disease riddled and cancerous.

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What removes paint from fabric? If its water based paint: acrylic or watercolour, use soap and water (should come out in normal wash. If it's oil based paint us either White spirits, Turpentine or petroleum. Do NOT smoke whilst doing it!

| 1 person likes this

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I need a Male Stud for my female Siberian Husky...She is around 2 yrs old and has already had one set of pups..she is AKC registered anybody interested please answer or comment I've never refused a bitch... is she on heat now?

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I am Bulgarian! Tell me the first thing that comes to mind, when you hear that. (even if it's nothing) I won't bite, so be honest! Short hairy men with 1" willies (like my good friend (Iuriy).

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If someone told you you have a small penis, how would you react? I go home and ask my moms opinion.

| 1 person likes this

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Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you? Yes... and bizarrely there's two pink balls attached to it?!

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What was the last thing you bought for your house? A hat.

| 1 person likes this

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If you only had 2 hours left to live what would you do? Take a dump on my boss's computer.

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What is a good inexpensive outing for a poor family that have been barred inside for too long Worm hunting

| 1 person likes this

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What's your favorite non-cuss cuss word? Mine is "sunny beaches" You pilchard!

| 2 people like this

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What is the name of a singer that has "soul?" Ozzy Osbourne

| 1 person likes this

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What would you do if you won $100,000? Gamble it.

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I always catch the girl i like looking at me. what does that mean? She's making sure you're at a safe distance. I bet if you stand up she'll run.

| 3 people like this

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What's the best way to keep warm on a cold day? Pre-heat your oven to gas mark 7 and climb in.

| 1 person likes this

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What's the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word 'God'? Nuns, Suspenders, whips... oxygen deprivation... dildoes... the norm.

| 1 person likes this

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Why are you in denial about this question? I'm not... I just don't believe it exists.

| 1 person likes this

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Can 13 year olds be mature? At what age CAN'T a person be mature? For the reference, I am 18, this is just a basic question. If it's a 13 year old piece of cheese, yes.

| 1 person likes this

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What is the best way to dispose of a body? A cemetary.

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Did you learn how to diagram a sentence in english class? Is it still taught in schools today? Why would you draw a sentence rather than write it?

| 5 people like this

Answer to:
How old do you have to be to join answerbag the youngest member is 5

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If you owned a book store, what would you name it? 95% Crap Paper

| 1 person likes this

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Amnesty or exile? Should we kick out all the illegal aliens in the country? Or should we grant them amnesty but force them to give all their information to register as a US citizen? And should "anchor babies" be an excuse to give the parents citizenship? If you kicked out all the illegal aliens there would only be a handful of people left.

| 1 person likes this

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What would your reaction be if an angel told you that you were chosen to undo a pact set millenia ago between God and Satan? This is research for a book I'm writing. I'd ask: "Can't this wait until I'm dead?"

| 1 person likes this

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Are there any unanswered questions that are unanswerable? Well thats a little better 2/30,000. Thank you.

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Is it good sportsmanship to boo at the opposing team? I don't know about 'good sportmanship' but it is just good manners to do so.

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What subject is taboo? That depends on the brain. For me there are no taboo subjects.

| 2 people like this

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What does "lol" means? Lady of Leisure

| 1 person likes this

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Could you explain the most embarassing time that you passed gas? During a job interview. What was worse was that I followed through... the smell was atrocious. Never got the job. Dry cleaning bill: $25

| 1 person likes this

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Should you be allowed to keep midgets as pets? As long as you train them not to poop in the house.

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Can anybody suggest me the best and effective treatment for baldness.i m 22 male and hv lost so much hairs.please help me. You're screwed ...hard luck SLAPHEAD!

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I've got 99 problems but a ___________? ain't one! 3 inch sausage

| 2 people like this

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Do you agree that breastfeeding in public is acceptable, which shouldn't be frowned upon, and also a basic human right which should not be denied? Yes it's acceptable. And the mother could even earn an income from it by charging 'pay-per-View'.

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Ever got Egg on your Face...? No, It's just a bad case of acne.

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What's worse, bird poo on your suit or dog poo on your shoe? neither... but human poo in your pants ain't much fun.

| 1 person likes this

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Can I install nylon strings on "steel string" acoustic guitars (or vice-versa)? You can, but it will sound awful.

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Would like life to be in reverse? Be retired with money when you are young and go to work when you are old, would that be fun? If life were in reverse you'd die when your a baby and so never get old.

| 1 person likes this

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Which is the most energy efficient way to dry laundry indoors? The microwave

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What is the first thing that comes to mind when i say 'relax'? Something very painful is about to occur.

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What's one thing you should always have with you? a toilet roll

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What would people who grew up in the 1990's talk about? The 60's or 70's.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is your definition of a rich man? His wallets bigger than his brain.

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What is the absolute weirdest movie you have ever seen? Eraserhead... it's great though.

| 2 people like this

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How can i be lucky in my career and business? by being the best.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How does an ugly guy improve his confidence winning at russian roulette.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is beyonce's nationality She's Chinese.

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What are some color names of nail polish? I love that under 'Deep Thoughts'! +4

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What are you afraid of above most other dangers? Getting caught.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
How wealthy is wealthy? Pick a number. Its not always a number.

| 2 people like this

Answer to:
Is answer bag completely free? Don't pay your internet bill and try and log on.

Answer to:
Anyone have any tips on making a bomb using typical household items? Yes. Make your kitchen completely airtight and turn the stove on. After 45 minutes ignite. If you want a little more fun... fill the stove with nails.

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
How much of a change is it from a vegetarian to a vegan? 5 letters: (etari) VEGetariAN

| 5 people like this

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What is one thing you'll never hear Paris Hilton say? Hang on... I'm thinking.

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I really don't understand why people get tattoos. Can someone explain this to me without saying they liked the art, picture, or whatever it was they put on their body? I just don't get it It's the same as having an avatar.

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Have you ever written a book or poem? If so please list the title and ISBN number. If the poem's short, please consider posting it ..... A book with a publisher at the moment... should go into print this summer. Poetry lots... but heres one I made for an earlier answer today: MY RUBBER DUCK When I get lonely I rub my rubber duck I fart he rides the bubles As they break around the tub I pick him up and kiss him I smother him with love I don't need a girlfriend 'Cause I've got My Rubber Duck.

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What could you do as a child that you can't do as an adult? A number 2 fully dressed and amongst friends.

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What comes to mind upon hearing "pudding"? Pudding bowl haircuts... my entire youth!

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Her name was______, and she was special because_________? Her name was George, and she was special because of her beard.

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Do you trust blacks? I've asked some ridiculous & childish questions, but I will never beat that one.

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How can you tell if a chick is mad or don't like you anymore? She'll build a wall down the middle of the bed.

| 2 people like this

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Is it true that during sex, the woman gets better orgasms while she's on top? It depends who she's on top of.

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What is that secret u have been hiding from everyone? atleast a hint ;) My penny is now a fenny.

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A lot of people call me _______?(fill in the blank ) Mandy

| 4 people like this

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Ok, I nervously messaged a guy I think I might like about an hour and a half ago to ask if hes free, so far no reply. I need someone to tell me he might not be near his phone. What are my chances? freaking out. Don't fret... he might just be with his girlfriend.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you think that scrapbooking is only for old, fat ladies? No. Kurt cobain... Pete Doherty... Picasso... Leonardo Da Vinci.. Scrapbooking can be a work of art.

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Ok I have a lot of male friends that are just my friends nothing romantic. Do you think I should stop communicating with them if I become involved in a relationship? No. If it's all innocent that would just be a shame.

| 2 people like this

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Why is your head so far up your backside? I'm trying to locate my heart.

| 1 person likes this

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What would YOU do with $1,000 if it was handed to you? sell it on e-bay.

| 3 people like this

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Have you been born again? Yes, last saturday night. I returned home covered in blood, pooh and goo.

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Whats 5 plus 5? What you're asking is impossible to answer... The famous mathematician Stevie Lobster spent his entire life on this equation... and died never having answered it.

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Name a food that taste better as a left over Anything my wife cooks... left-over and thrown out (preferably).

| 1 person likes this

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What's the funniest thing you've been DR'd for? I seriously had to laugh at being DR'd for not having sex yet! *gigglesnorts* If you ask thought-provoking questions and give intelligent answers (like me) you will never be dr'd.

| 2 people like this

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How can you increase the thickness of your penis? Block the end and then pee.. that should do the trick.

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What's so great about Australia? It's so far away.

| 1 person likes this

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When you go to the mall, what are you typically there for? To steal

| 2 people like this

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My friend just drew my avatar today. What do you think? Great... who is it?

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How do i become a millionaire? take out a huge life insurance policy on yourself and then commit suicide.

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Why do people wear clothes anyway? Because if they didn't everyone would be naked.

| 1 person likes this

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Should a man touch up his hair with highlights after the age of 50? Be honest, please! Whats wrong with grey hair? I think its sexy... I can't wait until mine goes.

| 1 person likes this

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Look at the size of ____________________. Wouldn't you be nervous too? his feet.

| 4 people like this

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Can photography be Art? It's not one of the seven arts... but neither is sculpture. For me, it is the artist and not the medium that decides what is or is not art.

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Which celebrity has transformed the most, physically? Genesis P Orrige - singer with industrial band Throbbing Gristle. If you think wacko Jacko has changed a lot.. check out this guy.

| 3 people like this

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What do you do when you don't know what to do? guess.

| 1 person likes this

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Bad things to do during an earthquake? Build a pyramid with cards.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you have an interesting fact or piece of random knowledge that you tend to always bring up in [new] conversations? What is it? That water is actually wet oxygen.

| 4 people like this

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Since death is a certainty, are you prepared and willing to talk about your own? Speak for yourself... my deaths anything but a certainty... people like me linger on forever.

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The last time I checked, my __________ was still _____________! (be nice!) wife was still there.

| 1 person likes this

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How did global expansion and exploration contribute to the cultural exchange among continents? God, what a question... I suggest you read EMPIRE by Niall Ferguson. It will answer that for you.

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How has your life changed since you met your S/O? (if you have) What are the major differences now? Considerably. I met my partner on the first night of a new exhibition of my paintings. She is french and teaches philosophy and gave up her teaching post to come to London. After 6 months we decided to move our life to France. That was a simple decision for her... but for me it entailed a lot. (The decison was easy... only the logistics were difficult). Now we are settled and all is perfect......

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Honestly does the smell of a fresh anus turn you on? If not, does it bother you? Fresh no... unkempt, YES!

| 2 people like this

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Are child molesters only male? I have never seen news regarding female child molesters. Are they just included in child abuse incidents? What about Myra Hindley?

| 1 person likes this

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Wouldn't you love to kick a terrorists ass? No... we've seen where that gets the world.

| 1 person likes this

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Why do people say hello To gloat

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Is it wrong that i had sex with both my sister and my girl cousins when i was a boy it was 4 of them Sounds pretty normal to me.

| 1 person likes this

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What is the difference between sex and politics? Sex always seems to get into the White House... politics never does.

| 1 person likes this

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What is something you should probably NOT give someone for Valentines Day? a black eye.

| 3 people like this

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When you are out driving, Why would you need to pull over to the side of the road? To sober up.

| 1 person likes this

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Sex is a _______? an anagram of ex's.

| 1 person likes this

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Can you outsmart the "Boy Genius"? (Link to him provided.) I didn' t go to the link, but from previous experience 'Boy geniuses' can be outsmarted with baseball bats.

| 2 people like this

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Can you trace the trade that your early ancestors did in the middle ages? (Blacksmith, farmer, artist, warrior hunter...) My ancestors built the computers for Estebans family's software to run on.

| 1 person likes this

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Would you ever forgive your s/o for cheating? With me as a boyfriend, not only would i forgive, but I'd understand completely.

| 1 person likes this

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How far would you go to earn points? Points mean nothing... if I started from 0 tomorrow I really wouldn't care.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you think literature is a dying art? There are more books written now than ever before... they are just printed or recorded on different formats.

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How do you tell when you need a break from AB ..? When you start getting serious.

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Have you ever cheated on a test? For what class? What grade were you in? How many tests did you cheat on? Did you get caught? Yes, all the time. I used to memorise all the answers before the exam.

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About how many text messages do you send a month? I normally send one to myself just to make sure its working.

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How do I get rid of shoe smell in my wardrobe? Is there a low cost solution I can make at home? put your dirty underwear in there... that will overpower the smell of the shoes.

| 4 people like this

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These are my classes for my "spring" semester that starts tomorrow: Psychology of Adulthood, Personal Finance, Genetics, Jazz History, and Philosophy Ideas in Literature. In your opinion, which sounds like the most interesting class? Philosophical ideas in literature - you'll have a wonderful time with that one... It will not even feel like study. Psychology is also very interesting.

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What is your favorite type of coffee drink? Tea

| 1 person likes this

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There is a thin line between____________ & ___________. this & that

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Does everyone that go into the bermuda triangle disappear? The simple answer is yes... no-one has ever come out the otherside.

| 1 person likes this

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Ask me a question about the future or about you or something. ask me to try something psicic. i am not psicic, but i want to try anyways. lol :) Whats my mothers name?

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Can you read my mind? Yes, unfortunately it's completely blank.

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Girls in glasses: hot or not? As long as there's a brain behind the eyes it really doesn't matter.

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I was told " AB is a site made for the people who are too lazy to google or do actual research themselves so they get other people to do it for them." What would you say in response to that statement? I don't agree with that... But I think that if you really needed a question answered the last place you should come to is AB. Before internet and such sites, people never spent 4-5 hours of each day lurking around Citizens Advice asking question after question.

| 2 people like this

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When you are looking at an old photograph of yourself, what is one thing you always notice? God, i used to be a man?!

| 5 people like this

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The best things in life are___________! addictive

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What activity should not be done in a rush? sleeping

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Do you find that you tend to write much better when you're emotionally disturbed? I used to think that until an event took place whereby I understood true loss and pain... I found I couldn't touch the subject at the time. I think little ruptures are creative, but if it goes to the extreme I become passive. For me, writing with the nerves freshly open is like bathing wounds in alcohol.

| 2 people like this

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Does not wanting to be in a relationship mean that you're selfish? No, it means someone else is extremely fortunate.

| 1 person likes this

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Are you out of answers? Yes, I don't even have an answer to this question.

| 1 person likes this

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How do I find God? If you remove your brain, he'll come to you.

| 3 people like this

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If you could brag on one part of your body, what would that be? My 3 inch whopper.

| 2 people like this

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I just boiled WAY too many potatoes for dinner. What can I do with them tomorrow, so as not to waste them? plant them... you'll have a potato tree by summer.

| 2 people like this

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What do you do with a three dollar hooker? Anything you want... she's a threee dollar hooker.

| 2 people like this

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My dogs bleeding from her vagina? Stop having sex with her then!

| 1 person likes this

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Do you think bush is a good president? why or why not? He was a joke... sometimes a good joke, sometimes a bad one... but nevertheless a JOKE.

| 5 people like this

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What will chicago do with homeless when olympic come to town? They'll probably stand them up at the starting line and shoot them... it's been done before.

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Would you want a Jehovah's Witness at your murder trial? Yes, as the victim.

| 2 people like this

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What is something that a Cook uses? Guinea pigs (usually family).

| 2 people like this

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What is something that people talk to that never talk back? plants

| 1 person likes this

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Would you kiss a perfect stranger? Yes, as long as I knew him well enough.

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Have you ever suffered from accident as a direct result of your own stupidity? No... I seem to get away with it.

| 1 person likes this

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What is youre philosophy towards work? DON'T. (unless extremely desperate)

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Whats one thing true about you? I only wear suspenders to board meetings.

| 4 people like this

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What has happened in a movie that you would like to, or wish, would happen in real life? Armageddon

| 2 people like this

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Can you tell me a specific kind of box? ex: jukebox ... & Tool Box.

| 3 people like this

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Can you tell me a specific kind of box? ex: jukebox Black box (on aeroplanes) Bird Box Dirt Box Toy box

| 2 people like this

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Is your word as good as a bond? it's better... a bond can be broken.

| 1 person likes this

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Have you ever been fired from a job before? I'm PROUD to say that I have been FIRED from EVERY job I've EVER had.

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Why are women so picky compared to guys when it comes to dating? Because if they pick the wrong one they'll get f*cked!

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If you could sleep with a celeb which one would it be? The dwarf from Twin Peaks

| 1 person likes this

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Who is a "famous" person who would make a GREAT bouncer? Danny Devito

| 2 people like this

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Are you always late for school or work? No, but I'm always late home... (why is it they don't mind about that?)

| 1 person likes this

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What is something, Your Grandmother always Said? "Gotta go change my drawers.... Grandma's been dribbling again!"

| 1 person likes this

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First thing that comes to mind when you hear Chester. Himes - a fantastic writer.

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I`m thinking of employing a woman. Can they be trustworthy given a fair wind and a firm hand? No... rid your head of such delusions! There is nothing that can be done for the condition that is being a 'woman'... it is a terminal illness. They're quite beyond help or trust.

| 2 people like this

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Can you name a band that starts with the letter "N"? No.

| 3 people like this

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Can you use the word "nosh" in a sentence? She/he was noshing on his/her ???? Need I say any more?

| 2 people like this

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If alcohol were banned, what would your reaction be? I'd go and get drunk.

| 1 person likes this

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Sometimes answering a question with a truthful answer based on your experience is considered "unhelpful". How can telling the truth about one's actual experience be "unhelpful"? Isn't it considerably more helpful to know the truth than to be told a lie? Rosie you're absolutely correct. Disagrreing with somebody's view and classing it as unhelpful are completely different things. If you gave a response I didn't agree with, it is still helpful in the fact that you replied, gave your opinion. I think some people here get a childish kick from having that tiny bit of power to be able to minus points (if they had any real power their...

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I get teased a lot by my college friends because i like the alternative rock band muse, does anyone here like it? why? Well, you're out on a limb if you call yourself 'Muse'... because you'd better be it. I don't think they are... I don't think thery're great. Still, I can't understand why you're teased about liking them... it's just your choice of music.

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What is something that you have to "Add Water or Milk" to make it? a bath.

| 1 person likes this

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Whats a Common Complaint of the Elderly...? "Gawd... coffins are so expensive nowadays!"

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I love my---------. lover (& respect my wife).

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How many layers of function can one art piece have? It can have as many or as few as the artist arms it with. Though not all functions are desirable. A decorative or a blatanly commercial function is scowled upon by many artists. Something practical yet inbued with design - e.g a chair - serves many different and varied functions.

| 1 person likes this

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I'm broke. Can anyone give me some cheap and easy recipes for a nice meal? No more beans on toast!! Roasted red-peppers, tomatoes & pasta. Dry roast quartered red-peppers in frying pan. When skin is black and bubbled scrape off. Add tblsp of oil (olive if available). Add 1 whole tin tomato & half of juice froml tin. Salt, pepper + 1/4 teaspoon sugar. Put in blender and blend for 20 secs (must not be smooth). Pour over pasta of choice! Simple. Ing: 1 x red-pepper 1x...

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Why did the chicken really cross the road? It was free-range.

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Do you think Latin should be brought back into the curriculum? Why? No. I speak and write fluent latin and it is one of those skills that are completely useless. BLESSED makes some good points in its favour, but personally I would rather have our children being taught subjects which are relevant.

| 1 person likes this

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Could you write a poem about Rubber Ducks for me Plllleeeaassee? MY RUBBER DUCK When I get lonely I rub my rubber duck I fart he rides the bubbles As they break around the tub I pick him up and kiss him I smother him with love I don't need a girlfriend 'Cause I've got My Rubber Duck.

| 1 person likes this

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See if you can make these words into a four (only) line rhyme: busted, sank , tornado, petal, carpet. They sank to the carpet Busted from his arse A tornado of sweet Rose petal farts

| 1 person likes this

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How can you get over a girl you feel you cant replace? Buy a goldfish.

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It just seems a little odd to me, I'm a university student and live with 7 other guys. The rest of them are all scrawny, except for one who is fat, and they all get tons of girls at the parties we have. Maybe big muscles just aren't 'hot'? You're at the wrong parties... with a physique like yours you should be at gay parties. I promise you... you won't be leaving alone then.

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Have you ever gone shopping straight after work, still in your uniform, and while your shopping in other shops people ask you questions thinking your staff? (or is this just happening to me :S ) I enjoy that... It makes me feel important. I Sometimes linger around the aisles all evening hoping to be mistaken in that way. It's even not uncommon that its ME who makes the approach... pretending to be an employee and offering my assistance.

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Does it bother you if you see a couple making out pretty intensely in public? No, I normally try to join in.

| 1 person likes this

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What does silence sound like? women when brought to climax.

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What can you do better drunk than sober? Shout at walls & fall over.

| 1 person likes this

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Are you writing a book? I've a book with a publishers at the moment: 'Memoires from the Black House'. I've another completed book and am curently halfway through a third.

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Are cocktails just for girls? No because they're made of cock and tails!

| 1 person likes this

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For those of you that have balconys at home - do you use them much? I've thrown two girlfriends and one wife from it.

| 1 person likes this

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What is the best comeback line you've ever heard? (revised) "sir, if you were my husband I'd put poison in your coffee." "Madam, if you were my wife I'd drink it!" - Winston Churchill to Lady Astor

| 1 person likes this

Answer to:
What is the best comeback line you've ever heard? "Sir, if you were my husband I'd put poison in your coffee." "Madam, if I were your husband I'd drink it!" - Winston Churchill in reply to Lady Astor

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What is more important to you: Outer beauty or inner character? Inner character anyday. For me someone beautiful can become vey ugly due to their personality, and someone not immediately attractive can become beautiful due to wit, intelligence, kindness, humour...

| 1 person likes this

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What is the biggest truth to you? Important: Answerbag cannot guarantee the accuracy of answers submitted by members, and we recommend that you use common sense when following any advice found here. That's the biggest truth!

| 1 person likes this

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Can anyone make any suggestions to help a 16-year old girl get used to having to wear glasses full time? Whats wrong with getting her contact lenses? Is it not an option?

| 2 people like this

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Does what happens in Vegas really stay in Vegas? NO, but i believe that what is won in Vegas stays in Vegas.

| 3 people like this

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What is the " dress code " here on Answerbag? Idiot cap and invisibility cloak.

| 14 people like this

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Why would you call the cops......... If I caught my neighbour stealing my mail.

| 1 person likes this

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Why would a chick dump you if you never did anything bad to her like cheat,lie,beat,and not love her? She just didn't love you... nothing wrong with that. One may be nice but boring, or nice but lazy, or nice but annoying (I'm not saying you are)... Niceness cannot make someone who doesn't love you change that emotion.

| 1 person likes this

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Don't bite the hand that _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank) wipes the arse.

| 1 person likes this

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Hey, are you okay? I've never been better thank you... having enormous fun here.

| 1 person likes this

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If you drink by yourself do seem to get more drunkk then you do if you are doing something or are around people? For me it's the opposite way around. I don't seem to feel the effects so much when I'm alone.

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Do you have family problems..if so what are they about? Not any more... but my brother and sister do.

| 1 person likes this

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Guys and girls, tell me have you ever touched a brother, sister, or cousin from age 10-16 just for experimenting and learning, and what was the situation? Yes, My sister and I were doing the 'wild thing' together into our late 20's. Then she cheated on me... I found her in bed with our brother.

| 1 person likes this

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First thing that comes to mind: The tri-state area? Drunk, stoned and euphoric.

| 2 people like this

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Lovers love it,friends need it,relationship starts with it,life ends with it,what is it? A climax

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What's the weirdest thing you have made out of tinfoil? A pair of trousers - Bee Gee concert 1976

| 1 person likes this

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Do you keep a picture of your pet in your wallet? Of course... and my girlfriend also has one of me in hers.

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Do people always change their bed sheets after having sex? If you done that, what would you use to wipe up?

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Okay, so i smoke dope. i have a drug test coming up soon and i need a 100% way to pass it. anybody got any tips? and if you wanna give me some lip bout don't smoke at all don't waste your time typing Shave off every body hair you have... change your blood... and politely ask your mom for a urine sample.

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The darkest hours are _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank) lighter than you'd imagine.

| 2 people like this

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Where will we NEVER find you? In hiding.

| 1 person likes this

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Can anybody think of a sentance with words that begin with the letters B Y D K T O? Belgium yodeller denies killing traditional overture. .

| 1 person likes this

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One generation plants the trees, another gets _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank) hayfever.

| 2 people like this

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What really weird thing(s) are you afraid of? Boobs.

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Why is yoga so popular compared to other forms of exercise? It's a lazy persons exercise. If you were 300lbs would you rather bend our arm around your head or run a mile and do 100 crunches?

| 1 person likes this

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Where you a difficult teenager? Yes, and I'm an even more difficult adult.

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I am not pretty, in fact im damned ugly, would that stop you wanting to date me? Yes... with a face like that you can only ever be lonely.

| 6 people like this

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What's a good reason for getting drunk? If you're a surgeon and have to perform a complicated nerve-racking operation.

| 1 person likes this

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Do woman have testicals Yes, and nipples grow on them.

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How would you describe your mother? With my eyes.

| 1 person likes this

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What is a way to greet someone besides "hello?" Link arms and tap ankles.

| 1 person likes this

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Are you able to ignore questions on here you view as stupid and/or uninteresting? Thats quite difficult because 9 times out of 10 it's me who posted them.

| 2 people like this

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What do you think jesus would say to people who use the bible as a weapon against homosexuals? I don't theink he would say anything... he'd probably just bend them over and give one of his famous demonstartions.

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Do you know any foreign swear words? If so, which ones? Enculé, con, connard, pute, branleur... swear words are an important part of our heritage and language. There has not been a great writer in the last hundred years who hasn't put such words to effective use.

| 1 person likes this

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If men could get silicone to give them an Arnold Schwarzenegger body, should they I wouldn't mind a pair of boobs... but I wouldn't go much further than that.

| 2 people like this

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Never spend your money before you have _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank) private health care.

| 1 person likes this

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What is the best thing about being pregnant? That it can't happen again for a while.

| 2 people like this

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What is the point of giving someone negative points for giving there honest opinion even if it's not the same as yours, I don't understand the negative part? They think they own the site and they 'decide' what is acceptable or not. They believe they are morally superieor when infact they are imbeciles. They ask no questions and post no answers, instead they spend there sad lives watching like hawks for some remark that offends their pea-sized brains. If they were not on AB they would be peeping from behind their curtains all day and...

| 2 people like this

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Your Definition of LAZY? Sleeping with your clothes on so you don't have to get dressed in the morning.

| 1 person likes this

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Has anyone else ever had a rough experience with a chicken? Yes, I had to go to the hospital and have it surgically removed.

| 1 person likes this

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Curl up next to me or go sleep in another place when we're done? Run away screaming!

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In your opinion who is the sexiest man alive or sexiest woman? My boss George.

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How useful your answerbag's friends have been to you? About as useful as an umbrella to a bald man.

| 1 person likes this

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I hate working , i mean i HATE working , how can i make money and be lazy at the same time? Lay on your stomach and part 'em! You can even stay logged on to AB while you're earning.

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What's the first name of the person you flirted with today? My boss George.

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Should marrige be for life? It's ok to be married for life if you die young... but what if you're unfortunate enough to live until eighty or ninety??? No, long marriages are just cruel.

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Whats the worst thing about being pregnant? You have a baby.

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Do you straighten your hair,curl it, or just brush it? I straighten the sides and curl the fringe. The back is permed.

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Whats a world record that you would NOT like to break? the most amount of eyes.

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How much a month do you pay for internet connection. its free

| 1 person likes this

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Did Isaac Newton ever say he invented the cat flap? No it was the flat-cap.

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No one is good at everything but everyone is good at _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank) nothing

| 3 people like this

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What's a good prank to play on an annoying co-worker? Ride into him with a forklift.

| 2 people like this

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What's the last thing someone said to you at the end of the relationship--their very last words? <3 Goodluck midget dick!

| 1 person likes this

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If a person makes you feel like you can hardly breathe and all giddy, is that a sign that you love them? Either that or she's just dyed her hair with amonia.

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Where do you keep your condoms? In the fridge.

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I broke up with a guy and we are still friends, but we seem to be growing apart. We only talk online.I check his email mostly to see what he's up to..and he's answering ads to buy used women's panties.He's a virgin and sexually frustrated, is this normal? That's his sexual kink... most f us have one. It's nothing strange nor abnormal.

| 1 person likes this

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What is the worst thing you can say to a policeman? Can I see your ID?

| 1 person likes this

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Have you ever asked a question just so you could answer it? Yes, and once I even gave the wrong answer.

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What would be on a Chinese pizza? Noodles and beanstalks.

| 1 person likes this

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Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be sane? Yeah, its a bloody scary thought.

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What are babies born without? Clothes

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Im hopelessly infatuated with my girlfriend and I miss her as all hell right now, even though i just saw her about an hour ago. Suggestions? You've got the love bug... enjoy the pain.

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What does 'Carpe Diem!' mean? I take it you've never watched 'The Dead Poets Society'.

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What is something you wish you could have back? My spine

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What tricks can your cat do? he can say the alphabete backwards.

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What Country are you from? How many Countries have AB users do you think? England

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...what is your heart made of?... Tampons... squeeze it too hard and it bleeds.

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How can I divorce my wife without her knowing? Because then she would want half of everything.

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If you owned a pizzeria, what would you name it? A Pizz-A Pizza (A piece of pizza)

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What sorts of meat do you like best on your pizza? potatoes.

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Girlfriend said i was suffocating her for asking questions.she started to hangout with her best guy friend and his friend that had a crush on her.i would get mad.we break up and now she is with that guy that likes her.and told me she never loved me. By the sounds of it you whined and begged and cried... forcing her to say she loved you when that wasn't what she felt. The truth is as she says... she never loved you. Why would she lie? Get over it.

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My girlfriend has cheated on me 8 times when she has been drunk and she sends half naked pictures to other guys. she tells me she is going to change..i love her very much but i cant handle much more..should i dump her? If she's doing that she doesn't love you very much... You dump her??? I think she's already dumped you.

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What colour was your prom dress? Mine was pink and my girlfriends was black.

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Do you think that lesbian gay transexual and bisexual people should have more help out there? and if yes why? You are talking as if they are disabled? All the labels you used contain the word 'sex' in them. This is the only difference: they lead and have specific 'sexual' desires - as we all do. Should there be more help for people who like oral sex? The types you mentioned are normal, healhy people.

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Am I a cross dresser if I just wear things for comfort and warmth. Even if you are... where's the problem?

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I cheated on my bf at the weekend. i hate myself for it. it was only a one night stand and i was mega drunk and it meant absolutely nothing to me. i can honestly say i love my boyfriend and i would NEVER EVER do anything again. do i tell him? No. If it meant nothing forget about. My concern is that I love my wife and I couldn't cheat on her no matter how drunk I was. For this to happen - even due to masses of alcohol - says to me there is a problem somewhere in the relationship.

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What's your number one fashion rule? Y-fronts and vest... not one without the other.

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Are you worried about social acceptance? No, it is more social unacceptance that I fret over.

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Do married men ever really leave their wives for the other woman? No, but there have been cases where they have left them for better looking men.

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Is there death after life? No, but there is death after life.

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What is your routine, after you sign in @ answerbag? To think of as many serious and challenging questions as possible. I pride myself on the quality of my qquestions.

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Hi can you guys please rate me? i only have 4 points to level 2!! yay!!! thank you!! ~Liza No prob. +4

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How old where you when you finally finished going to school? If you haven't finished, when do you plan to be done? 13

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Is perpetual lateness a real mental illness or is it laziness? Lateness isn't a mental illness, though maybe the reason that causes it is.

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Which US President do you think had the best facial hair? Clinton when he had his face buried in Monica Lewinskys 'cigar holder'.

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What is your favorite flavor of Cake? Carrot cake... or anything with walnuts or pecan nuts.

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My sister had sex with my best friend, and lied to me about it. She's been with at least 7 guys in two months and she just turned 20. She now has the reputation of being easy, how can I tell her that she's being a whore and is going to ruin her life? Maybe she enjoys sex... maybe she has some needs she is trying to fulfil. She's certainly not a whore.

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Do you think married couples should have access to each other's email? No, that would just increase the divorce rate.

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If you found a wallet on the ground in a public place would you try to return it? Yes, but I'd take any money out first.

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"America will become a Socialist Democracy under President Obama, similar to Germany, France, the UK, and Sweden." Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Who has described France as a Socialist Democracy? The UMP & Sarkovy are wide out on the right with racist and nationalistic policies... so no, I cannot agree with that statement. Whoever wrote it must have political brain damage.

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If u was to open a Chinese Food take out Restaurant, what would the name be? Only one answer per person :D Wok the Fook

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A woman is alone in her house with a murderer. She breaks all the light bulbs, why? The footsteps on the broken glass will let her know where the assailant is.

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Is it true that the Queen of England thinks the World smells of Wet Paint and Disinfectant? Are you refering to Elton John?

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This questions is for deep thinkers. Does your mind still know the path back to hell? I've a cognitive map of hell in my head... there's no escape for me.

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Do drugs make u cool For me this is a serious question. many young people do find drugs and drug users cool. Look on any celebrity/music site. Whether in literature, music, poetry, art... drug takers have been idolized. So I end by saying: drugs do not make you cool, but may make you seem cool & outrageous. The pay-off though is you'll die at a 'cool' age in your 20's or 30's. Be...

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A drowning man will clutch at _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blanks) water

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Do you think its ok to sleep with your first cousin? Only if your sister refuses you.

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What's a good way to scare someone? Phone them up pretending your from their bank and tell them that the bank has gone bust and they've lost EVERYTHING... the house, the car, their savings, the dog and the kids.

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Somebody went into my profile and down rated everything I have done (questions answered and asked) for the last three days. [I can tell it's the same person and they're all -2]. Has this ever happened to you? Well I'm gonna go into your Q&A's and +4 everything... so in a way, the person helped you get more points. Lets thank them.

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What did englands do at america Are you an alien? What is this jibberish?

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Is it wrong to want to smoke meth/crack so I can get skinny? I don't see any harm in that... it's more enjoyable than laxatives.

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Dont you hate it when someone randomly rates your questions or answers at negative for no good reason. Your answer is clean and reasonable. who are these people? I don't care... what are points. I'm here for the enjoyment. Still, people do that because they think that they own the site... that hey cannot even hold down virtual relationships is very sad. very, very lonely peolple.

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What is something funny your pet likes to eat? jokes

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My girlfriend gave a back massage to another guy, but they're only friends. Was this cheating? The back massage wasn't cheating... but the blowjob was.

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What one day do you remember more than any other day? And why, please? The day my grandmother gave birth to my mother.

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Explain the world in one word? square

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How many teeth do you have? 6 left.

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I truly believe that a guy should ask a girl out first. By believing this, what kind of man do you think I will attract? You'll be attracted to the one's who don't approach you.

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Why do black people call each other "nigga" all the time? As TuPac said "Nigga is not Nigger!"

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Okay fellas--My d*ck is so big: ___________! I can't see it

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What is the normal medical procedure when someone dies at home? Remove their internal organs and put them on ice.

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What kind of law should there be created? sods

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If you were going to stab someone, what type of weapon would you use? A spoon

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Name a large creature? The missus during the middle of each month.

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What does vomit consist of? scrambled pledges of undying love.

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Can you describe your grandparents in one word? copulatingcorpses

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I took 2 hits this past Sat. B4 that it had been 75 days or more. Urinalysis test next week. Going to drink 1/2 gal. or more water over the next few days. Thoughts? Yhtomitzlots is correct in what he says, but you are lucky you are having a urine and not a blood analysis. You should be fine... if in doubt ask your mom if she wouldn't mind lending you a sample for the occassion.

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Can anyone define "love" in one word? i pick passion. fistfights

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What would you title a book telling the life story of your best friend? How My Mom Turned into My Lover.

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If i shoot a gun, what moves faster? The bullet? Or the sound of the gunshot? That depends on where you are when you shoot the gun.

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Do you believe in guardian angels?if so why? Yes, I've seen them on the metro.

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It has been proven that smoking a few cigarettes a day is healthy. At which point does 'a few' become too much? My father died from lung cancer... he smoked 5 cigs a day. The real point of my question is: is one too much? Thanks for your response. +

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How often should men wash their hair? once a day.... twice if they're bald.

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What makes you laugh that really shouldn't? funerals

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I have 3 exams in the following 2 days, WHAT DO I DO? Keep the PC on. If you're not already prepared its too late.

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Where were you born, where do you live now and where would you like to live? Born: London Live: Lyon - France These two cities satisfy me.

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If you saw a "drunk" laying on the pavement, would you try to help him or would you just walk around him? If he had had an accident I would discretely change his underwear and leave.

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Do you have pain? Yes, my head hurts.

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Do you or have you shopped with a calculator? if I buy less than 2 items I just add it up in my head... I've always been quite good at maths.

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Can you get pregnant through oral sex? Only if your ovaries are in your mouth.

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What color is your relationship with your s/o? On good days dark grey.

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What is the fastest way to your heart? Straight up my arse

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Why do old people smell They pee & poop themselves and either don't have the energy or the desire to clean themselves. Personally I find it rather sexy.

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Help! I'm having my baby girl tomorrow and I don't have a name for her! I'm very difficult with names and we're running out of time! I like simple names but not popular. Older names are nice if they haven't been used for a long time. Any suggestions? George

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If you were asked to say 3 things about your best friend what would they be? My Wifes Lover

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Which is more addictive: alcohol or weed? Alcohol like heroin is physically as well as psychologically addictive. This means no matter who you are if you put it in your body often enough you will need it to be well - you will be sick/withdraw without it. Weed is only psychologically addictive. Neither addiction is healthy.

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Dead men don't _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank) rise!

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Is it ok to date skinhead, if your good friend from class is black? The first skinheads were black jamaicans who listened to ska. This was the early sixties. The fashion was brought to great britain and white men into jamaican ska started shaving their heads. In the seventies and eighties this fashion became corrupted and lent itself to nationalism and the far-right. There are still skinheads who hold the original ideals... not all skinheads are rascist. If it...

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How Do You Keep A Girl Forever? keep it at the friend stage

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Will toothpaste help a pimple? If you've got pimples on your teeth I advise you get to the dentist immediately!

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What do you do if your madly in love with someone and they will never be n love with you? search for someway in which to blackmail them.

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Does eating ice cause medical problems It can cause frost-bite.

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How do you know you are truly in love?? does there have to passion? The smell of the city changes and the dirty old canal becomes yours.

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If you met Cupid, what would you tell him? Was it your arrow that took my womans eye out.

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If I had a third arm & hand, I would _______!! be able to wipe my bottom very discretely.

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I am thirsty, what shouldt i drink? Oil

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What are the dangers of leaving an oven open over night to warm the house? There is no danger, do it... and don't forget to E-mail me from the severe burns unit.

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Do you have everything you need in life? I've too much... and I don't deserve any of it.

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How do you know when to give up on a guy? When he's breathing.

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If you could only wear one piece of clothing for the rest of your life what would it be? A willy warmer.

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How can i make my relationship with father God more serious propose.

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Great minds have purposes, others have _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank) a seat in congress.

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Will you all help me congratulate our friend Stu B on making Maestro today? Here's a virtual beer.... congrats.

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I'm looking for a cool way to say Happy Birthday to someone without just using boring words "happy birthday." "Congratulations death creeps a little closer"

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If you are instructed to have an animal fasting 12 hours before surgery and you don't do it and send the animal in, what could be the result? It will choke on its own vomit.

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Is there such thing as true loves kiss? Yes, it comes from the black widow.

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Do you have a Steady Hand...? Yes, when I'm not suffering from the shakes.

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Why do you smoke your particular brand of cigarettes? They have the safest health warnings

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Have you ever seen a man´s penis while at a urinal? I always look... if I'm feeling very lazy I reach across and wash my hands in his pee.

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If you could do one special thing for a day, what would it be? The Google logo

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Name something that people do in a bath? defecate

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What's the worst thing that you can say on a first date? Do you mind if I bring my mom?

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Why do you love where you live? Between two rivers and a café every 100 yards.

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What did you collect growing up? about 4 different fathers

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I can't help thinking there are no normal people on answerbag, am i wrong.? Maybe it's you???

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Which singer-songwriter felt the earth move under her feet in 1971? The fantastic Carole King

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If someone new moves in next door, do you go over and introduce yourself to them? Or do you keep to yourself and go on with daily life? I keep to myself and hope they go away.

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Have you accidently farted whilst laughing? Yes, and often I also 'follow through'. It used to be embarrassing, but my friends and work colleagues are used to it now.

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Can smelling bleach get you high? No, but if you pour bleach on tobacco, dry it out and smoke it, you'll not be disappointed.

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Who has a cooler haircut? God or Satan? Not sure about that... but I've heard Satan has a terrible problem with split-ends.

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Whats your best excuse to end a phone call? I particulary like "I have to go, I need a poo." sorry, but I need to change my tampon.

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What is your favorite band that you think I have never heard of? BabyShambles Tindersticks

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Can someone tell me the difference between a cockroach and a down rater? cockroaches don't hide!

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A person has learned much who has learned how to _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank) peform a triple heart by-pass operation with his eyes closed.

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Can you describe yourself in one word? headache

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A _______ is a terrible thing to waste? (Fill in the blank) question

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What documentaries should be required viewing(post a trailer)? Shoah - by Claude Lanzmann. It's is a 9hr documentary on the holocaust. 9hrs? yes, but it is such a great piece of work that it flies by and actually seems too short. Sorry for no insert.

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Why would the author consider plaglarism to be such grave offense Few authors do consider plagiarism an offence. "Plagiarism is the sincerest form of flattery" - Oscar Wilde

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What word do you find yourself using too often? sorry

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Can you describe your neighbor in one word? Dead. He died just before christmas.

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Help me! I've ________ and can't _________. (Fill in the blanks) farted and can't breathe

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What can I say? Nothing if you've not got a tongue.

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Monty Python's 'Life of Brian' was voted Britain's favourite film today. Do you think it deserves this status? If not, what is your favourite British film? It deserves it... but there have been many great British films. From the 50s & 60's kitchen sink dramas... the Ealing comedies... the Carry On films... Hammer films... Ken Loach... early Danny Boyle films... and Shaun of the Dead.

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What's the best, worst way to "go green"? worst by holding your breath.

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Are you full of surprises or are you predictable? You know, your opinions, the food you like, the people who attract you...do they ever change or were they the same ten years ago as they are today and likely to be the same ten years from now? No I don't think I'm predictable... though in many aspects of life predictability is necessary and not a bad thing. 10 years ago I surrounded myself with people of my own political/social beliefs, whereas now, most my friends are from the opposing camp. Dinner is much more interesteing now... even if we do occassionally throw lambchops at one another.

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My baby will be 2 at the end of june. He does not talk at all. Should I be concerned? No... he's probably thinking of what to say.

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What does it mean if a girl asks you for money for her 16th birthday? It normally means you're her father.

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Do you ever want to just call some people idiots on AB? Don't bite your tongues... I wouldn't be offended.

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Where did I hear the quote "If the road you chose has lead you here, of what use was the road?" You're quoting a Bon Jovi song... give that one up.

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What did you say to your parents when you went out to smoke weed with some friends? don't worry i'll save you the roach.

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Would you marry someone who was blind or handicapped Not intentionally.... though if my wife were to become either blind or handicapped I would love her just the same.

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The girl im with now is the only one that ever accepted me for my 4.5 inch penis. She treats me badly though and i just take it all cuz i feel like shes the only chance i got at haven sex and bein kind of happy with a girl? are my feeling right or wrong? Are you sure your penis is that small? Maybe you just have big balls.

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Do you know any homophobes? What is the worst thing you've heard them say? Well, let's say, they render my nonsense sensible!

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I am married and have a mistress. Yet, my mistress still dates, and every once in a while has a borderline boyfriend. Is my mistress truly a mistress, or just a slut? You little dog... I enjoyed that one!

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What's written on your birthday suit? Out of Order.

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If you are not already married, would you marry the person you are dating? Errr... how the hell can I answer this. I would marry her if it didn't hurt my cherished wife.

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I am writing a research paper for my 11th grade english class, the topic has to be on an american(well known) author and his/her work. the work of the author is the primary source. any suggestions? Choose a female writer... they're often overlooked.

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On a standard typewriter keyboard, what vowel is not on the top row? They're all on the top row if your in Spain or France.

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On a standard typewriter keyboard, what vowel is not on the top row? They're all on the top row if your in Spain or France.

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On a standard typewriter keyboard, what vowel is not on the top row? They're all on the top row if your in Spain or France.

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On a standard typewriter keyboard, what vowel is not on the top row? They're all on the top row if your in Spain or France.

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On a standard typewriter keyboard, what vowel is not on the top row? They're all on the top row if your in Spain or France.

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Are you an artist? I paint and live of that. Though I think you can be an artist without creating anything... your life can be an artform.

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Teenagers having sex is ____________? normal

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What do you think when you hear adults or parents say, teenagers don't know what love is. Then why do they always ask theier kids "Do you love me?"

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How do you want your human remains disposed of? Put in my annoying neighbours dustbin

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What are the best lyrics to a song that was recorded? why? Farewell to this lands cheerless marshes Hemmed in like a boar between arches Her very Lowness with a head in a sling I'm truly sorry - but it sounds like a wonderful thing Dear Charles don't you ever crave to appear on the front of the Daily Mail Dressed in your mothers bridal veil So I checked all the registered historical facts And I was shocked into shame to discover ...

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Im 19 years old and embarrested about the size of my penis. wil it grow in time. i am stil a vrigin because im so embarrested. how small is it? Can you see it?

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Will you give me some points? Everytime... +++

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1. When electric current is flowing in a circuit, if the voltage applied to the circuit is increased, A. the resistance will increase. B. the current will increase. C. the resistance will decrease. D. the current will decrease. refer to Ohms law for that one... wasn't it taught to you in school?

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To all of the men out there where do a man hide things to keep his girlfriend from finding out . where do you look? at my lovers place

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Which are better, boxers or briefs? Why? Briefs.... boxers can't defend you in court.

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What happens if you shoot a gun loaded with the wrong type of bullets? you kill the wrong type of person.

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What is the sound of shit happening? my voice

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What food, or food combination, do you love even though others find it disgusting? toe jam

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I cant belive that you can _______? do the Can Can.

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Does keeping your word really matter to you? Not at all... I lie and scam at every opportunity.

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Does anyone here dance? That depends what state I'm in... Never in NY.

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How do you deal with ugly admirers.ugly crushes? When they approach u and all? I vomit and apologise.

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If you can make a _____ then you can make a ______? period baby

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If you had a gun that can kill anything. what will you do throw the bullets away

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Pleas someone give me some points im still leval one There you go my friend. +3

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Is it painful giving birth to twins? That's a myth... its about the same as farting.

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Hypothetical situation: While driving, you hit someone on the road and that person died. S/he was not supposed to cross the road in the first place, the light was green (for you) and it was not the proper place to cross the road. Would you feel guilty? No, I'd get on Ab as quick as possible and give myself +4

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If Jesus sits at the right hand of God, does God have hands and who sits to the left? Lenin

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Why am i so rasist? Racism doesn't exist... only idiocy.

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What's the worst thing that can happen in childhood that affects relationships life long? being force-fed salmon.

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Stealing is wrong, but at least I understand the motive behind it. Why do people litter? Everyone should litter.... maybe then the extent of waste and overproduction would be more evident.

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When your gone, will there be good memories of you? No... but there'll be a few under-arm salutes at the burial.

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What is your favorite song at the moment or the one you have been thinking of most recently?.. La Belle et La Bète - Babyshambles

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Have you ever admired someone so much that you found yourself "adopting" certain words, phrases, attitudes of his/hers? Family member, friend, celebrity? It's called mimitism... it's quite normal.

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What would you attempt to do if you knew that you could not fail? you wouldn' t need to 'attempt' anything... you'd just do it.

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I have not smoke weed in 88 days will i past for a hair drug test took couple of hits Shave your hair off.

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What's the best names for twins? double & trouble

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When I say "All night long" what comes to your mind? The impossibe.

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Who kicks more ass? Cinderella, or Faster Pussycat? Guys... it's nearly 2010. Put your heels, glitter and lipstick guns away.

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What is the easiest way to pass a drug test?? study... know your drugs well.

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When is NOT a good time to kiss your S/O? when your husband or wife is around.

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I'm starting a mystery novel. I have the characters and the basis of the plot worked out, but I'm struggling with whether or not it should be paranormal. I love the paranormal genre but I'm scared it'll lessen the impact of the characters. Thoughts? Write with style .If you use genre use it as a metaphor. Make it socially relevant.

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What's a style trend you just don't understand? Heroin chic was a weird one.

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I have a plan to make the guy who likes me jealous of one of my really close guy friends so that he'll ask me out. do you think i should do it, or do you think it would be wrong? Jealousy can become an absolute nightmare... It's ruined more relationships than its ever made.

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How do you start writing an essay? With an original viewpoint.

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Is it okay to answer my own unanswered questions, just to lower the number of unanswered questions here on AB? I'm thinking of doing that. I need your opinion folks! It's interesting you post questions you know the answer to... I thought only I did that.

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Why don't people complain about TV shows like The Wayans,Yo Mama and The Apollo (sometimes the comedians) that make racist jokes about dark skin black people racist? I agree with Blackberry... if it's funny it's valid (as long as it swings both ways).

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How old were you when you kissed for the first time? Seven. We both closed our eyes and missed... and in some strange way it taught me a lot about life.

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What is your favorite ice cream flavor? Chestnut... you've gotta try that!

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What is something that it NOT very fun to do naked? collect the kids from school

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What is the best thing a person could do while kissing you? tie my shoe laces

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I drink scotch, smoke a pipe, listen to classical music and the news on the radio and often go to wine tastings. Does this make me eccentric or just outdated at the age of 22? You sound like upperclass-twit-of-the-year... don't try jumping over matchboxes.

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What would you do if you came home and found your partner in bed with someone else? curl up and go to sleep.

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What's your most embarassing moment like? Waking up wearing a used condom in my mums bed.

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What are the negative effects of marijuana? It stops you smoking as many cigarettes.

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What is something random from your childhood that you remember even though it is seemingly insignificant? being breastfed.

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If you could switch between life and being a ghost at night time only. What would you do as a ghost? Haunt myself.

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What causes a person to sleepwalk? Their feet.

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Have you ever kissed a total stranger on impulse, maybe on a strong uncontrollable urge? Yes, I once celebrated not getting a job by kissing a policeman.

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Is it true that 77% of marriages are sexless? I've heard of same sex marriages but never sexless ones... are you sure there so common?

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Are you partially crazy? It's much worse han that I'm afraid.

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Why cook when you can create? Most artists enjoy cooking... that should tell you something.

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Do you know of anyone with reverse prejudice? My mother's neighbor is an Anglo-Saxon who nearly worships people who are lesbian, gay, have different color skin & religions other than Christian. Everyone else is no good. Your thoughts? It can be understood as an attempt to distance oneself from the horrors that your own race has committed. I understand that, though I am not it myself... and neither do I think it is a step forward.

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What would you do if a bum was sleeping on your porch swing? wipe it.

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Are the Harry Potter movies responsible for the moral decline of our children? I don't think there's been a moral decline in children... there's more been a moral decline in the parents.

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Whats the last train trip you experienced? How was it? Lyon - Paris... bloody awful, was full of french people.

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To input and output data from files your program must? be switched on.

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Should the penalty for attemped suicide be death? Great question... has to be! +3

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What do you think of Ian Curtis' voice? I've been waiting for a guide to come....

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When you go to bed, do you sleep in your shorts or in your underwear? I wrap myself in newspaper and crawl in my box.

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Are there ever any sensible questions asked or answered on AB? or am i just on the wrong page? Yes there are... It gets really boring sometimes.

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I woke up today feeling very weak and my muscles ache. When I try to sleep i get VERY hot and start sweating. What do you think i have? Have you been using a lot of heroin recently? Sounds like you're withdrawing.

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What is the most common thing to fall out of your pockets? your hands.

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Do you have a home remedy of curing the hiccups? would you care to share it? hold your breath for 4 minutes.

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We need a cheap country to live in, cant afford to live in the uk !! we live in scotland in the uk, and despite working all possible hours, i cant afford to live. we are a young couple.need a safe country to start a familly. please help Bulgaria. Cheap at moment with rising economy. Many other scots already there.

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CAN I USE WILTONS CHOCOLATE CANDY MELTS IN A CHOCOLATE FOUNTAIN A tax rebate

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Someone once told me_______________, and then I started to cry? dead

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What is the costliest item in your house? my wife

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Which room do you keep the landline phone in? The toilet... because I talk a load of shit.

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Is it legal to purchase replica watch? As long as it's slightly different.

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What can I do when the end of my drill is too big for the screws I'm trying to put in? Use bigger screws.

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Whats the worst thing that anyone has ever said to you? I do.

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AC/DC vs Guns 'N' Roses? (AC/DC for me!!) Appetite for Destruction... it can't be beaten.

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________ can never be plural? pluralism

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Will you please give me your honest opinion about these shoes? They'll look great with a long dress that covers them.

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Can a woman with a really big nose still be attractive? If it pokes out further than her breasts, no.

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What is the most popular tea in England? coffee

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Other than the item being "marked" Sterling, is there an easy way to tell silver plate from Sterling silver? scratch it. If there's a differ.ent metal underneath it's plate... if not take it to a jewellers and they'll do a quick acid test on it.

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Do you think Angelina Jolie is ugly or pretty? she's pretty ugly.

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I am very depressed...i dont know what to do anymore... Read my questions and then be glad you're not me.

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Why to guys leave me for a uglier girls maybe they serve better fish.

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How is it that are whites settled in africa, asia and south america today? Blame the Brits... if not the French... If you're really cruel take it out on the portugese.

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What would be the weirdest title for a "For Dummies" book? ventriloquism

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Do you own more or less than 100 books? I have a library of books... all with the last few pages torn out.

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Reggie kray do you know my name? Ronnie... Charlie... is that you?

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What is the difference between a college and a university, if any? colleges are full of university dropouts.

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Why would there be blood when whipping after taking a number two? Dangerous? haemmoroids... still go see a doctor.

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Have the words "I love you" ever accidentally spilled out of your mouth? yes, and it's normally followed by a bellyful of alcohol.

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How long have you been on Answerbag and how did you find out about it??? Because i can't remember how i came across it. I'm one of the co-founders.

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Where would be the coolest place to get married? a cemetary

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If love was a flavor, what would it taste like? piss

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What's a great way to overcome writers block? Get yourself out and observe a little life.

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What age did you stop looking at porn? Just after I blow my top.

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Do you regularly eat at 5-star restaurants? All the time and I'd do it more if they done take-away.

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I have a drug test tomorrow, if I snorted one bag of heroin friday night will I be cool by monday? and what should I do to make sure? Heroin takes 7 days get out the body. Ask someone to give you a urine sample.

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Why are some people so stingy in handing out ratings is there a certain number of points we are allowed and they save these for certain people? Not everyone. +3

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You and I go together like... what? corpses and maggots

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Which Items to take on a Dirty Weekend...? toilet roll

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Should it be legal to sell your virginity? It should... but what happens if it's returned as faulty?

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Can i just say hello hello hello to all my British citizens? What's up Duck?

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Who is your favourite person in this world? Johnny Thunders... what a name!

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What movie(s) do you know all the words to? I know all the words to many silent films.

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If you could go back to any moment in history, where would you go? Yesterday

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How can adult children of alcoholics recover? Headache gets serious. Thats a fantastic question... It will usually come with reflection on reaching adulthood. My parents were both alcoholics and at the time it was impossible to comprehend. I don't think much can be done at the time. When you're within it as a youngster help is often intrusive.

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How do i become cool get a good air-conditioning unit.

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Name one thing that you take for granted every day that you would consider a luxury if you didn't have it? Oxygen

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I went to France the people were great what did you think? Sandman is absolutely correct. If you make an effort to speak a little french you will be received much better. I speak and live in France (everyone still hates me though).

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Will u rate this question up? No probs... great question. +3

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Whats the purpose in life? To be as cynical as possible.

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Why do so many women get insanely jealous if their men are watching porn or happen to look at another woman? It's something I just don't get... How would you feel if you found your girl masturbating to the image of another man?

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OMG. I am sorry but I think I just stepped on your ______!? I've actually someones brain slip out their ear and fall on the floor whilst they were talking.

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OMG. I am sorry but I think I just stepped on your ______!? brain

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If blokes wear tight skinny jeans, will their penis' hate them? It sometimes retreats back inside thus leaving a small hole which can be used as a vagina.

| 1 person likes this

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How could a man tell if a "woman" is a fake i.e. really a man in disguise? If you touch her tits and she gets a hard-on... you're in luck!

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Can you help me find my______? penis

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Would the world be a better place without you? Almost certainly... but I'm gonna stick around anyway.

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What's your marital status? 3 wives in 3 different countries... Bigamist

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How old were you when you first started cursing? I was a late curser... didn't start until 5.

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Does religion make one a better person? No, it normally gets one parole earlier.

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How do you pay your bills- cash or credit cards? Hiding then skipping town.

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Why do mayors wear chains of office? so we ca hear them coming.

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What's behind the trend of women dating far younger (age gap of 10 and over) men? They've learnt we have a 'use by' date.

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What is the first thing that comes to your mind if you think of the word "Welcome"? They musn't know me!

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What does the acronym FTSTTRIOOS mean? Fry Thick Sausages To Trick Rambo Into Obvious Open Sight.

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WHEN you get to heaven whats the first thing you say to GOD? can I touch your tits?

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How do i cut my dogs nails without him freakin' out? whack him over the head first.

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Complete this sentence: I will __________ what I jolly well like! kill and eat

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Have you been a good person today? No... and I'm gonna get even worse.

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What is difference between friend and a lover A friend cares if you have an orgasm.

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Disease was knowingly used as a weapon against the Native Americans (starting plagues on purpose). This is the first time I have heard of disease being used this way. Were there any recorded times previous to this that disease was used as a weapon? Smallpox was used in Ireland (same as US). The Irish knew of smallpox then (unlike native americans) but were still helpless to it. The Indian & African uses would have been roughly the same time. Cannot give exact dates but would have been mid 19th century. Don't forget also that along with disease, alcohol was another 'biological weapon' used.

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I'm a newbie at playing pool. What is the best advice can you give me? Get your opponent drunk.

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What are some phrases your parents always say (or said) that drive (or drove) you insane? You'll be sorry when I'm dead. It's not the cough that carries you off It's the coffin they carry you off in.

| 1 person likes this

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Disease was knowingly used as a weapon against the Native Americans (starting plagues on purpose). This is the first time I have heard of disease being used this way. Were there any recorded times previous to this that disease was used as a weapon? The british used disease in Ireland a couple of hundred years earlier... then they used it in america, and then India, and then Africa... and then they said slavery was cruel 'after building an empire on it).

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When is the End of the World? When you fall off.

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Do you use your fingernails or a knife when you start to peel an orange? I eat them with the skin on.

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How many un-pointed answers do you have? I have a whopping 545!! Is that a lot or is it normal? I'll start working my way through and pointing them... deal?

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Can you remember the last time you saw a typewriter? Yes, I threw one through my editors window last week.

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If I scratch yours, will you scratch my ________? debts.

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Wheres the last place you'd want to be seen at? My own funeral.

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If someone was injured in a public place, would you help them or stare at them? I'd take a picture and put it on the net.

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Is it safe to say that I've finally just given up? Yep, now you can concentrate on living.

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Would you rather Kill yourself, or live the rest of your life as the person you most despise? As the person I most despise is myself i suppose I only have one choice.

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If you saw someone who was obviously handicapped struggling with things in a public place like a grocery store or post office, would you offer to help them? In either case, explain your reasoning. No, what looks like they might be struggling to us is maybe just the way they have to go about something because of their handicap. Many handicap people claim that this is the request that they dislike most.

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Can I come over and ______ with you. over

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Ladies: What is the best quality of your man or men in general? Dead but still hard.

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What is something you wish you could have back? my beer-gut.

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Do you have a cleaning person or housekeeper? housekeeper... and yes, I pay her double and half her hours.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you have decidophobia? I'm not sure... I can't make up my mind.

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Do you think hard-working people deserve to be better off? Do you think it's unfair that certain people were born rich and will stay rich? Wages should be doubled and hours halved. It's disgusting that people can slave away all their lives and barely be able to afford a holiday once a year.

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What do i do if my man wants to have a threesome everyday? Tell him you don't mind as long as it's 2 men & 1 woman.

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Are Babies born evil or is it down to Social Circumstances? yes, babies are inherently EVIL!

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When you purchase tampons/sanitary napkins, would you prefer the store almost empty or crowded? If I'm completely out and have to change it in the shop I prefer just a few people there.

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Is haggis (Scotish food made with sheeps organs sometimes available in large supermarkets) considered a healthy dish or is it junk food? It's a myth that Haggis derives from sheep... Haggis is a small mountain animal and is famous for having its inside legs smaller than the outside ones.

| 1 person likes this

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What is your favorite movie you watched when you were little? Resevoir Dogs

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So...my Birthday is tomorrow. When should I expect your gift? Mine was yesterday, so as soon as I receive your present I'll send mine.

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Im taking a poll, what is your opinion on gay people, shemales, and if you think they should be allowed to get married? A marriage should be a marriage... No matter who makes the mistake.

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Does your birthday land on any famous person or celebrity's birthday? Francis Bacon

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Do you think AB should make it impossible to submit a question until all of the simple grammar mistakes are corrected? ...mean a thing (was the end of the phrase).

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Do you think AB should make it impossible to submit a question until all of the simple grammar mistakes are corrected? There hasn't been a great writer in the past 100yrs who hasn't broken grammatical rules. As long as you're understood neither grammar nor spelling me

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Can someone help me, just started a courseon criminolgy , the question is, define criminolgy, how much do you have to write, do you have to go in to the theorys, or can you just answer it in a few lines , thanks An exact yet conscise summary is needed.

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Philosophers and scientists are hard pressed to come up for a definition of "consciousness". How would you define it? Consciousness is an intuitive comprehension of abstract ideas.

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How long have you been smoking? Do you have any honest intention to quit? How do you plan to do it? 17 years. No intention to stop that would be a waste of money... besides, i'm genetically programmed to get worse with age.

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Is there such a thing as a natural cleavage (without the use of a bra)? You acquire 'natural cleavage' between the age of 50 and 65... Do you still want it?

| 1 person likes this

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What animal would not be good as a guide for the blind A mole.

| 1 person likes this

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Why would someone fall in love with you? Because they are crazy and completely desperate.

| 1 person likes this

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Is it a big deal to turn a blind eye to your 14 year old son who smokes and drinks alcohol at the weekend? I would worry more whether he's a good kid or not. Boys will be boys.

| 1 person likes this

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Next to sex what is the most pleasurable bodily function to you? farting & following through.

| 1 person likes this

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What are some good Irish bands? or drinking songs? The Pogues

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Has anyone managed to gt a real bargain in the New Year Sales? I picked up a 2008 calender (almost free).

| 1 person likes this

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Have you had a pet that didn’t like you? Yes, I married her.

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I'm on AB for enjoyment. Why are so many people so confrontational? so ready to start a fight? I don't get it. If you ask sensible questions, like me, this won't happen.

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Can you really laugh at yourself or do you get upset when laughed at? yes, as easily as I can laugh at others.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you like your children? As long as I can send them home at night, I don't mind them.

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What will W do after he leaves office? Tour the world apologising.

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To me Dr. Strangelove is a really wonderfull film. Did you ever see it? It's one of Kubriks greatest.

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FOR GUYS: Are you turned off with bald women? (Just want to get opinions) Are you referring to 'Shaven Ravers'?

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How do you prevent hairloss? Remove the headboard whilst making love.

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How do you entertain yourself: movies, sport, outings, long drive, clubs , travel abroad....? A movie... ready-mad meal for one... & I finish it off with a strip-tease.

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If you could choose one person on earth, to get stuck on a deserted island with (for the rest of your life) who would you choose? George Bush... & I'd make sure he never escaped!

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What`s the opposite of fire? I always try extra hard to answer the impossible.

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What are you putting off? Death.

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Would you ever venture into public wearing pajamas and house slippers? I'm seeing more and more people doing just that. You must live in a very fast city... there's not even time to dress.

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Were you born on an odd day, or even? Odd, 31st November.

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What`s the opposite of fire? employ.

| 1 person likes this

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What does your desktop look like? Post a picture! It's a picture of my computer screen.

| 1 person likes this

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If you had to raise a non-human baby, what species would you choose? a jellyfish... I don't imagine they're much different.

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Who created God? Walt Disney

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Never date a woman who..........? has bigger balls than you.

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From where do you access AB? Home, workplace or somewhere else? I sneek in from behind.

| 1 person likes this

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What have you noticed about yourself, as you get older? I find myself checking & comparing the price of coffins.

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How do I get out of this Padded room? Act crazy.

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In the symphony of life, what musical instrument are you? The funeral knell

| 2 people like this

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What keeps you awake at night? My eyes

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If I gave you a racehorse, what would you name it? Hand-me-down Horse

| 1 person likes this

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Does God really exist If there is he's not on-line. I've tried e-mailing him but have never received a reply.

| 2 people like this

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It's really COLD this winter...... HOW COLD IS IT? Well, it's so cold _____________________. ...cows are producing frozen milk.

| 1 person likes this

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Why do fools fall ________? ...off bridges.

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Honest answers please. If you were about to board a flight today and saw a group of Middle-Eastern men boarding the same plane, would you feel a bit uneasy getting on, in light of what happened eight years ago with 9/11? What do suspiscious middle eastern men look like??? Thats the real problem.

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Why did you stop believing in Santa Claus? Because he always ended up in my mothers bed!

| 1 person likes this

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What is your favorite part of going camping? Phoning the rescue services to come and get me.

| 2 people like this

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Tomorrow is library day ..any suggestions for a good read? Anything by George orwell.

| 1 person likes this

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What is something in your home that's out of date. My calendar.

| 1 person likes this

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Is it stupid to text a girl at 11:30pm just to say goodnight? That depends if you know her or not.

| 1 person likes this

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Where is every one? Lyon, France... it's 2009 here.

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I've had 2 terrible experiences with therapists - the guy thought all my problems were PMS and the woman was stone cold - what can I do to find a GOOD therapist to talk to? A guy thought all your problems were down to PMS... God, what a surprise!!!

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Why dont we fly our trash into the sun It would burn

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Your favorite documentary was___? Shoah - Claude Lanzmann.

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Is there really a difference between these terms? White American, European American, Anglo American, and Caucasian American? Is there really a difference when defining white people? There should be no difference when defining either white or black people. An Americans an American no matter what he's dressed or skinned in.

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Will you be watching the inauguration ,and do you believe it may result in violence? I doubt if the tables were reversed he'd watch mine, so I think not.

| 1 person likes this

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My dear friend NUNYA has made SAGE only 24 days after joining AB, would you like to congratulate her on such a speedy accomplishment? Well done Nunya... we'll do our best to keep you rising.

| 2 people like this

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What comes to mind when I mention " dirty "? Harry

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If you new for a fact that you were going to hell at any minute what would you do Put a fan in my suitcase.

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Have you ever hugged a dog? I used to, but it was too frustrating to stop at hugging... I always ended up taking it further.

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Which animal has the strongest sense of hearing? Worms

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Do fish get pregnant? If you've got a goldfish try and see.

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What's the best job in the world? jobless

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What does it mean when someone says "Large as Life?" It means yo are very surprised to see someone: "I couldn't believe it, he was there, as large as life!"

| 1 person likes this

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Is there one item that you wear continuously? My pants

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If God and Allah had dinner together one night, what would they think of each other afterwards? They'd probably get completely shit-faced and end up in bed together.

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Have you learnt from past mistakes? No, I constantly repeat them.

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When is a grandchild considered too old to sleep with their grandparents on an overnighter? between 18 - 19.

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Fill in the blank: Jesus is my______. porn.

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How to overcome fear and become a strong person? Because you fear something doesn't mean you're weak.

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Israel or Palestine ? Who do u support? I support the palestinian strugle, and I support the right for the existence of both states.

| 3 people like this

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If infected by a zombie bite would you rather kill yourself or fight until your death? I'd kill myself so as I could return as a zombie

| 1 person likes this

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How to break up with your girlfriend Have sex with her father.

| 1 person likes this

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There's been surveys proving that Americans have been getting less happy over the decades. Why do you think this is so? They're slowly realising who they are.

| 2 people like this

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If someone gave you one million bucks, What would you do with it? sell it.

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What makes a stupid question? The answer

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I wish to have a totally natural birth without an epidural. How did you manage? pray for a wafer thin baby.

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Is Osteogenesis Imperfecta a type of dwafism? Please don't mention the 'D' word... my girlfriend left me for a dwarf and its still very sore.

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If your life were pages in a book how many pages do you think it would be worth? Why? 1 and that would be blank.

| 1 person likes this

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I want to hack anyone gmail account how can i got his/her password? Slevene@gmail.com - coroner. There, you can hack my account.

| 1 person likes this

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If your dog shits or pisses on the floor, how do you discipline it? You eat the shit then kiss the dog.

| 1 person likes this

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How many pairs of underwear should you take with you on a one week vacation? 1 and a scrubbing brush

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What is your height? 3'6

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What color is the room you are in right now? white with padded walls

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Do you get on with yourself? no, but i sometimes 'get it on' with myself.

| 1 person likes this

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Do you have a 'secret' door or passage in your house? yes but i don't know where it is.

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What do you do when you have dry mouth? eat peanuts

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Can't you take a______ when I yell! shit

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If a person has been blind since birth what do you suppose they see? darkness

| 1 person likes this

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What will you never believe in? the truth

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How can I get her ring size without her noticing put a spy-cam in the toilet bowl.

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Im think of commiting suicide , im 13 . should i ? my life stinks im constantly fighting with my parents , all my friends ( except for a few ) always find something to b mad at me for , im ugly , i think im fat ( 5`1 , 130 ) . im lost please help . If you do just be careful not to hurt yourself. And keep this in mind: it could be worse, you could be me.

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Today im going to have sex and my boyfriend going to eat my pussy out out for the first and im nervous what should i do? fart

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Will i fancy you? No, unless you like bald, toothless tramps.

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At a movie theater which arm rest is yours? I've had that problem. Now I just take my own.

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What comes to mind when I mention " marriage "? Divorce

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Whats the worst thing you could do/say when going through airport security? Inshallah.

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Whats the worst thing a man can say to a women during labor? I know you probably don't feel like sex so I'll settle for lollipop.

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What do AB friends mean to you? Nothing, i would stab them in the back without hesitation.

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I will do anything for you as long as _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank, be imaginative) you don't ask.

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What state do you live in? Do you like it? A drunken state

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What is on your bed right now? a dwarf in a top hat and suspenders.

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Have you ever left a restaurant without paying and why? No, but sometimes I pay and then run away before eating.

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Have you ever made a girl squirt? If that comes with or after orgasm, no.

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Does chewing gum lose its flavor on the bed post overnight? No, but my wife does.

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What would be your last words to a dying American Soldier? Would you like a cup of tea, sir?

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Which type of communication would you rather have from your family/friends: email or hand written letter? Why? I would prefer an e-mail through the post.

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Me and boyfriend are financing a car together, now he says he's gonna take it away if I dont do what he says Get in the car and drive as far away from him as possible!

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What is the animal metaphor for a person who is dumb? Humans

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Butter or margarine? Why? K.Y jelly... if not margarine as it is frustrating waiting for the buter to melt.

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What's the first thing you remember learning? I've forgotten!

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If you could be anyone for one day who would it be? My mothers only son.

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I found a pill that is white and has s21 on it what is it? How big is it?

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Do you girls out there mind chest hair on a guy? It's not bad on guys, but its one of those things which always looks sexier on a woman.

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Which country is considered to be full of beautiful women? The country with the most cunt trees.

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Would you kill a pedophile if you had the chance? No, I would never commit suicide!!!

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Has anyone ever put the telephone down on you? It would have to be a bloody big telephone!

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Read any good books lately? If so, what was the title and what was it about? I almost finished The Art of Indian Vegetarian Cooking by Yamuna Devi... but you know what happened there!

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I've always wanted to see _ _ _ _ _ (fill in blank) the backs of my eyes.

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What makes you you realize you are getting older? I pee & come at the same time - more often than not in public.

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Are any of you against divorce? Only if it is post-marital.

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Have you ever been laied? I got it together with my grandmother once, though I'm not sure if thats what you was asking?

| 3 people like this

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If you were able to take any one thing with you when you die what would it be Some anti-ageing cream.

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Would you ever have cosmetic surgery to please your boyfriend / girlfriend? My girlfriend insisted on me having a boob-job.

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How do you turn a girl on sexually? By gently touching her balls.

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What state did you attend first grade? What state did you attend your Senior year? A drunken state.

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Have you ever seen someone shoplift something? If so, did you report them to someone? Details? No. I'm pro-stealing... I think we should all do it now and again.

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What springs to mind when I mention bingo? Bingo Starr - the beatles drummer.

| 1 person likes this

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Big and blue or small and purple? Shrivelled with puss filled sores.

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What do you think someone should do after dropping out of college? Drop an E.

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I just pushed your buttons, What did I do? You fried my eggs.

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Watermelon & Tomatoes - are they fruits or vegetables? They're neither. They actually belong to a small group of trailing plants known as Proatzoids.

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What should be paid for instead of being free Thinking... maybe then it would stop people like me being so mind-numbingly stupid.

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What is something that you would like to witness in your lifetime? My funeral

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I collect interesting facts. Anybody got a good one? The word 'fact' is derived from the latin word 'factum'.

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What is your reaction when you think about your parents having sex? I'm ashamed to say it gives me a stiffy.

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What is some good ideas for a first date? Sharing a Mcdonalds and makig the unlucking girl walk home.

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What do you think should never be wasted? words (thats very rich coming from me!)

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Are you hated/disrespected just for doing your job? I'm just hated and disrespected FULL STOP!

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PISS ON __________? CHIPS

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Do you think, 40 is too old to go back to college? we got a guy in our school that's 40 yrs old/people keep giving 'em a hard time/calling'em "GRANDPA & OL'TIMER. You must never abandon the pursuit of knowledge.

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Why do home made Indian meals never taste as good as the ones you get in a restaurant? Even when you follow the recipes from Indian cook books to the letter. You must perservere and learn how to handle and manipulate spices. It will come, and when it does takeaway will be a thing of the past.

| 1 person likes this