Answerbag: not a sock puppet's answers

Answer to I am making a diaper cake for my sister in laws baby shower. This will be my first time making one. Has anyone here ever made one? Have any good tips for me?

Fri, 05 Dec 2008 20:31:38 -0800

I am making a diaper cake for my sister in laws baby shower. This will be my first time making one. Has anyone here ever made one? Have any good tips for me?

That really sounds disgusting. I wouldn't be able to eat a cake in the shape of a diaper. Have you ever changed a diaper? There's poop in a diaper. Who wants to think about poop while they're eating cake? Sorry, but that's just nasty.

Answer to Can u get this_____ off of me!!. what is the first thing that comes to your mind?

Fri, 05 Dec 2008 20:27:59 -0800

Can u get this_____ off of me!!. what is the first thing that comes to your mind?

rabid chihuahua

Answer to Is anyone else enjoying the sweet, sweet tears of the racists, sexists, classists, homophobes, raving christers, and other lunatic crypto-fascists after eight years of ignorant, Bible-thumping, flag-fluttering, Bill O'Reilly triumphalism?

Wed, 12 Nov 2008 17:02:10 -0800

Is anyone else enjoying the sweet, sweet tears of the racists, sexists, classists, homophobes, raving christers, and other lunatic crypto-fascists after eight years of ignorant, Bible-thumping, flag-fluttering, Bill O'Reilly triumphalism?

You sir, are an ass.

Answer to Do you think obama really is trying to pu together a 500,000 civillian police force for himself wouldn't that be like having are own kgb in the u.s.

Tue, 11 Nov 2008 11:12:27 -0800

Do you think obama really is trying to pu together a 500,000 civillian police force for himself wouldn't that be like having are own kgb in the u.s.

I'm thinking it will be more like Hitler Youth. A whole league of 250,000 18-24 year old males, goose-stepping to the new agenda. Yay.

Answer to I really liked McCain's concession speech. Not only because it meant that Obama won, but I think he acted honorably, and showed leadership. Any thoughts?

Sun, 09 Nov 2008 09:15:52 -0800

I really liked McCain's concession speech. Not only because it meant that Obama won, but I think he acted honorably, and showed leadership. Any thoughts?

He didn't win. And yes, it was a nice speech, but I would've appreciated it if he hadn't done so much Obama ass-kissing throughout. It would've been better if he'd have just thanked his supporters, said congrats to Obama and said goodbye. Instead he asked us to support a...

Answer to Would you be more willing to vote for McCain if he was half-octopus?

Sun, 09 Nov 2008 09:07:38 -0800

Would you be more willing to vote for McCain if he was half-octopus?

Still better than the annointed one. Besides, a few additional appendages would've increased his ability to multitask. Everybody loves someone who knows how to multitask!

Answer to How would you feel if McCain lost the race?

Sun, 09 Nov 2008 09:02:10 -0800

How would you feel if McCain lost the race?

Pretty much the way I feel right now: afraid for the future of my country, and concerned about the basic gullibility of my fellow Americans.

Answer to Do zombies take hostages?

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 21:39:33 -0800

Do zombies take hostages?

They've tried, but they just end up eating their hostages' brains anyway.

Answer to Does 8 years of Bush-only education in McCain's Bush-loving state of Arizona result in 8-year-olds murdering their parents with guns?

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 20:01:03 -0800

Does 8 years of Bush-only education in McCain's Bush-loving state of Arizona result in 8-year-olds murdering their parents with guns?

It's not nearly as wrong as you trying to blame such a tragedy on Republicans. Of course, we have to consider the source here, you're always spewing out some kind of crazy crap. Come on, be honest now, you're real name is Michael Moore, isn't it? Please tell me, are you...

Answer to I'm smart, i have big boobs, i'm not fat, i'm pretty, i have a good personality... why don't i have a bf?

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 19:45:18 -0800

I'm smart, i have big boobs, i'm not fat, i'm pretty, i have a good personality... why don't i have a bf?

maybe because you think too highly of yourself. maybe your "big boobs" are not incentive enough to overlook the character flaws that you have failed to mention in your idealistic, glowing self-assesment. maybe you're just an idiot. there are all sorts of reasons why you're...

Answer to Does anyone think that Oprah Winfrey has the hots for Obama?

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 19:13:23 -0800

Does anyone think that Oprah Winfrey has the hots for Obama?

pretty sure she does, along with all the other celebutards and the brain dead zombies parading as impartial journalists.

Answer to Do you think Hillary Clinton would have been the president if Obama was white?

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 19:10:30 -0800

Do you think Hillary Clinton would have been the president if Obama was white?

i'm pretty sure. no white man would've ever gotten away with the stuff that obama has. oops! sorry i forgot it's racist to say anything critical of obama.

Answer to Why do you think gun sales have sky rocketed after Obama won the election?

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 19:08:08 -0800

Why do you think gun sales have sky rocketed after Obama won the election?

because those of us who are still clinging to our guns and religion believe we have a right to them, and want to be prepared for when the obama administration tries to tell us otherwise.

Answer to What did the word "Change" stand for in Obama's campaign?

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 18:56:50 -0800

What did the word "Change" stand for in Obama's campaign?

i'm gonna change america into a third world country. i'm gonna change your "wealth" into poverty. i'm gonna change your constitution to suit what i THINK it should mean. etc, etc. oh yeah, and i'm also gonna change your freedom to a police state.

Answer to If Obama was Muslim would he be elected president? Why?

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 18:52:48 -0800

If Obama was Muslim would he be elected president? Why?

why not? nothing else stopped him, did it?

Answer to WHEN IS MONEY GOING TO START GROWING ON TREES, YEAR 1,2 OR 3 IN AN OBAMANATION.

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 18:49:39 -0800

WHEN IS MONEY GOING TO START GROWING ON TREES, YEAR 1,2 OR 3 IN AN OBAMANATION.

It isn't. But Der Fuhrer is VERY unhappy that you've asked this question. He says if you know what's good for you you'll shut up.

Answer to What is your favorite flightless bird?

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 18:41:34 -0800

What is your favorite flightless bird?

The Kiwi. They're really cute.

Answer to NOW THAT GOD IS GOING TO BE THE PRESIDENT AND WE FINALLY GOT THE DEVIL OUT OF OFFICE , WHEN CAN I STOP WORRYING ABOUT MY MORG PMT OR GAS, ELEC, FOOD. I HAVE 6 MOUTHS TO FEED. WILL GODBAMA HELP ME?

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 18:37:40 -0800

NOW THAT GOD IS GOING TO BE THE PRESIDENT AND WE FINALLY GOT THE DEVIL OUT OF OFFICE , WHEN CAN I STOP WORRYING ABOUT MY MORG PMT OR GAS, ELEC, FOOD. I HAVE 6 MOUTHS TO FEED. WILL GODBAMA HELP ME?

No. Sorry to inform you but, GODBAMA (lol) is going to take from your wealth and give it to those less fortunate than (even) you. I think we'll soon wish the devil back in office.

Answer to One thing you never want to be?

Mon, 27 Oct 2008 18:17:51 -0700

One thing you never want to be?

The guy who mops up the floors at the adult theatre.

Answer to Would you please join me in congratulating Tallyman on becoming a Sage?

Mon, 27 Oct 2008 18:15:30 -0700

Would you please join me in congratulating Tallyman on becoming a Sage?

Congrats, Tallyman!!! Way to go!!!

Answer to Your cooking is _________.

Mon, 27 Oct 2008 18:06:45 -0700

Your cooking is _________.

La Cuisine de la toxique!

Answer to Why do so many Christians feel threatened, offended or otherwise care about atheists like Richard Dawkins?

Mon, 20 Oct 2008 14:09:03 -0700

Why do so many Christians feel threatened, offended or otherwise care about atheists like Richard Dawkins?

I don't know why anyone cares what he says, it doesn't bother me at all.

Answer to Why does everyone who believes in God think he is good? Does anyone believe in God and think he is evil?

Mon, 20 Oct 2008 13:48:42 -0700

Why does everyone who believes in God think he is good? Does anyone believe in God and think he is evil?

People who believe in God know that He is good. We wouldn't have such faith if God were evil. Do you think Jesus was evil? Jesus said, "Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father" -John 14:9 This is how I know that God is good!

Answer to Is anyone else here terrified for our nation if McCain and Palin get elected?

Mon, 20 Oct 2008 13:31:04 -0700

Is anyone else here terrified for our nation if McCain and Palin get elected?

Not nearly as apprehensive as am I of an Obama presidency. You're "terrified" of McCain? Sorry, but McCain isn't nearly as scary as Obama's plans for "Change". Personally, I'm concerned about the threat of huge taxes, loss of freedom, and an ecological...

Answer to Way are you Republicans anti constitution?

Mon, 20 Oct 2008 13:00:21 -0700

Way are you Republicans anti constitution?

Why are you non-Republicans always trying to start trouble? Do you even know anything about the Republican party- other than what our extremely liberal media, Micahel Moore, and education system would like you to know? I doubt it.

Answer to When we have a presidential candidate who is intelligent, eloquent, has innovative ideas, why on earth would the colour of his skin have any impact on whether or not we would vote for the candidate?

Mon, 13 Oct 2008 22:40:08 -0700

When we have a presidential candidate who is intelligent, eloquent, has innovative ideas, why on earth would the colour of his skin have any impact on whether or not we would vote for the candidate?

The color of the candidate's skin shouldn't have any bearing on his or her eligibility to be president. However, it does not mean that if you aren't voting for that candidate that you're automatically a racist. In regards to Obama, it doesn't have anything to do with the...

Answer to I am truly scared for our country if palin is elected vp. mccain is about 200 years old and will probably drop dead after about 1 month in office. do you think mccain/palin have a chance to win?

Mon, 13 Oct 2008 22:28:48 -0700

I am truly scared for our country if palin is elected vp. mccain is about 200 years old and will probably drop dead after about 1 month in office. do you think mccain/palin have a chance to win?

I'm voting for them, so yes, I do think they have a chance. I love how people keep saying they're "scared" of McCain/Palin, it just shows your basic ignorance. The real threat is ignored. Socialist wannabe dictators are way less scarier, right? Like Pol Pot and Stalin, for...

Answer to In an argument, do you try to get in the last word?

Sun, 12 Oct 2008 22:23:01 -0700

In an argument, do you try to get in the last word?

pretty much, yeah.

Answer to Be honest... no one here knows you. Are you not voting for Obama just because he's black? Truthful answers please.

Thu, 09 Oct 2008 19:32:09 -0700

Be honest... no one here knows you. Are you not voting for Obama just because he's black? Truthful answers please.

The color of his skin isn't an issue to me. However, the content of his character and his political ideas are. I disagree with his plans for my country, and I'm hoping that we never have to experience the "change" that he has in store for us. Therefore, I won't be voting...

Answer to You’re at a dinner party and your hosts offer you an appetizer of frog’s legs. You _______.

Tue, 23 Sep 2008 23:01:34 -0700

You’re at a dinner party and your hosts offer you an appetizer of frog’s legs. You _______.

Quickly teleport to the other side of the room.

Answer to Where is the logic in creationism? How on Earth can anyone honestly believe in it?

Sun, 21 Sep 2008 17:48:00 -0700

Where is the logic in creationism? How on Earth can anyone honestly believe in it?

Frankly, I fail to see the logic in evolution. Like all this stuff just came from nothing? Not likely. Unless somebody can create a living organism in a lab somewhere from NOTHING I maintain my position that the Earth was created. Furthermore, evolutionists beliefs are hostile to society and...

Answer to Who would like to help me wish Little Dead Riding Hood a very Happy Birthday!?

Sun, 14 Sep 2008 00:17:56 -0700

Who would like to help me wish Little Dead Riding Hood a very Happy Birthday!?

happy birthday!

Answer to What's the worst thing you've ever seen on the internet?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 21:07:02 -0700

What's the worst thing you've ever seen on the internet?

Pretty much anything on rotten.com

Answer to If I pull out after 10 seconds or so, what are the chances of getting the girl pregnant?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:59:06 -0700

If I pull out after 10 seconds or so, what are the chances of getting the girl pregnant?

Much greater than you think. Unless you're ready to be a father, don't put it in there in the first place. IT IS NOT WORTH IT, regardless of what your friends and hormones tell you.

Answer to Goodwill or Salvation Army?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:47:10 -0700

Goodwill or Salvation Army?

I'd rather shop at a thrift store and spend my money on more important things.

Answer to Aeropostle or Abercrombie?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:39:26 -0700

Aeropostle or Abercrombie?

I prefer Goodwill and Salvation Army.

Answer to If Heaven and Hell had vacancy signs, what would they say?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:33:40 -0700

If Heaven and Hell had vacancy signs, what would they say?

Heaven's would say: We got plenty of room here Hell's would say: Recently expanded due to popular demand

Answer to So why didn't you vote for McCain in 2000 when you first had the chance?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:30:22 -0700

So why didn't you vote for McCain in 2000 when you first had the chance?

I was too busy voting for Bush- and I'd do it again.

Answer to Who is your favorite hollywood stud?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:27:51 -0700

Who is your favorite hollywood stud?

That would be Mr. Ed.

Answer to How would you complete this statement? "Praise the Lord and pass ______."

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:19:05 -0700

How would you complete this statement? "Praise the Lord and pass ______."

The ammunition.

Answer to Is "unthaw" a real word?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:16:31 -0700

Is "unthaw" a real word?

I knew this one guy who always used to say that. Bugged the hell out of me. I kept saying, "So you want me to freeze it, right?"

Answer to What's the best thing about necrophilia?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:13:22 -0700

What's the best thing about necrophilia?

You pretty much always have the upper hand in the relationship.

Answer to Whats your wallet made of?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:00:20 -0700

Whats your wallet made of?

The same stuff as black holes, apparently. Everytime I open it, it's empty.

Answer to What caption can you write for this picture? See my answer!

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:46:50 -0700

What caption can you write for this picture? See my answer!

" " That's the caption until further notice.

Answer to Do you read the long questions?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:42:24 -0700

Do you read the long questions?

Usually not. The longer questions tend to be the bizarre "could I be pregnate?" pregnancy or "did s/he cheat on me?" relationship ones. Boring. I think people just make this crap up, anyway.

Answer to Excuse me, did you just grab my bum?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:35:47 -0700

Excuse me, did you just grab my bum?

Me? No, no. See, I, uh, well... it was this guy behind me. Yeah.

Answer to What does RED smell like?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:27:53 -0700

What does RED smell like?

Maraschino cherries.

Answer to Boone's Farm or MD 20/20 (Mad Dog 20/20)?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:24:18 -0700

Boone's Farm or MD 20/20 (Mad Dog 20/20)?

Boone's for flavor. Mad Dog for the fast acting buzz- sure, it tastes like ass, but after a few sips you don't notice that anymore.

Answer to Why can't smelly people smell themselves?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:21:52 -0700

Why can't smelly people smell themselves?

Because they become immune to their own stink.

Answer to Where Did Obama's Money Come From?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:19:58 -0700

Where Did Obama's Money Come From?

He robbed a currency exchange, right? JOKING! No, seriously, he got it from the people who actually want him to be president.

Answer to Every time I try to lose some weight my husband arrives home with chocolate and/or biscuits. I'm not fat but just a couple of kilos overweight. He tells me I am beautiful just as I am. Why does he do this?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:18:03 -0700

Every time I try to lose some weight my husband arrives home with chocolate and/or biscuits. I'm not fat but just a couple of kilos overweight. He tells me I am beautiful just as I am. Why does he do this?

Because he's insecure and can't deal with the fact that if you lost weight, you might leave him. Resist!

Answer to Do you believe if a restaurant started selling sauteed raccoon anus on a stick that people would buy it?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:15:34 -0700

Do you believe if a restaurant started selling sauteed raccoon anus on a stick that people would buy it?

I would- That's the BEST part!

Answer to Do unborn babies feel pain when they're aborted?

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:07:42 -0700

Do unborn babies feel pain when they're aborted?

Yeah, they do. Especially during the "partial-birth" abortion where the baby's head is cut open during delivery and the brain is siphoned out. Abortion, in any form, is brutal and inhumane. You would be sent to prison if you did this to an animal, but if you do it to a baby, you...

Answer to Sarah Palin's 17 year old daughter is pregnant. Do you think this will hurt the campaign?

Mon, 01 Sep 2008 17:57:26 -0700

Sarah Palin's 17 year old daughter is pregnant. Do you think this will hurt the campaign?

No. In fact, she's setting a good example.

Answer to Are black Americans voting for Barek Obama just because he is black?

Mon, 01 Sep 2008 17:42:31 -0700

Are black Americans voting for Barek Obama just because he is black?

Probably not entirely, but I'm sure it's helping his cause.

Answer to Why are Liberals against the death penalty?

Mon, 01 Sep 2008 17:27:07 -0700

Why are Liberals against the death penalty?

Apparently, liberals feel that even if somebody intentionally and maliciously takes the life of another human being, they shouldn't have to give up their own. Instead, taxpayers get to support these murderers while they spend their lives in prison. And yet, these same people will fight you...

Answer to Why is it when you ask a question about Obama all the sniveling liberals on here minus it?

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 12:30:45 -0700

Why is it when you ask a question about Obama all the sniveling liberals on here minus it?

In short, it's the only recourse they have. If they can't argue with facts, they'll insult you, instead.

Answer to Should chimps get similar rights as humans since they are so closely related? I saw an article that this is already the case in Spain (same rights as children).

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 12:12:41 -0700

Should chimps get similar rights as humans since they are so closely related? I saw an article that this is already the case in Spain (same rights as children).

No, not unless they're going to work and pay taxes like the rest of us! I'm in total agreement with Someguy.

Answer to According to evolution, do you believe that human got evolved from monkey ? if yes, what happened the the creature in the middle between monkeys and people?

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 12:02:27 -0700

According to evolution, do you believe that human got evolved from monkey ? if yes, what happened the the creature in the middle between monkeys and people?

There's nothing there because people didn't evolve from anything.

Answer to Am I the only one who wants Sarah Palin not only as VP, but just the president all together?

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 11:55:35 -0700

Am I the only one who wants Sarah Palin not only as VP, but just the president all together?

Sounds good to me.

Answer to What do you think your evil twin is doing right now?

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 11:53:35 -0700

What do you think your evil twin is doing right now?

I know what he's doing, he's on the left hand so I can see him. Right now, he's reaching for another cookie and planning his strategy for world domination.

Answer to Do you think McCain's pick of Palin took all the wind out of Obama's sails??

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 11:48:06 -0700

Do you think McCain's pick of Palin took all the wind out of Obama's sails??

Let's hope so.

Answer to I think I'm jealous of Obama. My boyfriend is really into politics and he thinks that Obama is like the best guy on earth. He is always volunteering for his campaign and I never get to see him anymore. What do I do?

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 11:46:01 -0700

I think I'm jealous of Obama. My boyfriend is really into politics and he thinks that Obama is like the best guy on earth. He is always volunteering for his campaign and I never get to see him anymore. What do I do?

Maybe you should join the other side and campaign against Obama and then he'll break up with you and then you'll be free to date a real man.

Answer to Which movie character said "I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti"?

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 11:41:50 -0700

Which movie character said "I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti"?

Hannibal Lecter