Answerbag: As confused as the guy next door.'s answers

Answer to Should we consider the rights of animals to be comparable to those of homo sapiens?

Sun, 06 Nov 2011 11:04:34 -0800

Should we consider the rights of animals to be comparable to those of homo sapiens?

Even better.........straight sapiens.............what's next, buddy? Consent of the tree for plucking an apple?

Answer to How come the price of alcohol at a bar is 5 times or more higher than the same thing bought at a supermarket?

Fri, 01 Jul 2011 04:36:13 -0700

How come the price of alcohol at a bar is 5 times or more higher than the same thing bought at a supermarket?

Simply because of the chick who would be sitting at the bar two stools away from you, she would also be getting more beautiful by every sip that you take

Answer to What do you do when you are really bored?

Thu, 30 Jun 2011 16:11:21 -0700

What do you do when you are really bored?

Suffer boredom!

Answer to The evening was going well until _______.

Sun, 12 Jun 2011 10:49:26 -0700

The evening was going well until _______.

Ning left...

Answer to Where is Louis Vuitton made?

Mon, 30 May 2011 18:22:34 -0700

Where is Louis Vuitton made?

ebay.

Answer to Do you like Police Officers?

Sat, 28 May 2011 08:25:49 -0700

Do you like Police Officers?

Depends on whom to be charged.

Answer to My boyfriend smokes but is desperately trying to quit. How can I help?

Fri, 27 May 2011 03:10:13 -0700

My boyfriend smokes but is desperately trying to quit. How can I help?

That's simple; if he keeps inhaling, you stop blowing!

Answer to What movie haven't you seen that you are really looking forward to seeing?

Mon, 04 Apr 2011 18:53:49 -0700

What movie haven't you seen that you are really looking forward to seeing?

The "Coming Soon to A Theater Near You".

Answer to Why has religion been most influential in regions that have poor, ignorant inhabitants?

Mon, 04 Apr 2011 18:46:46 -0700

Why has religion been most influential in regions that have poor, ignorant inhabitants?

Maybe, only maybe, because the poor ignorant inhabitants are more religious!

Answer to What wouldn't you be caught dead wearing?

Tue, 29 Mar 2011 03:20:41 -0700

What wouldn't you be caught dead wearing?

A fake smile!

Answer to What are you constantly in need of?

Sun, 27 Mar 2011 19:42:38 -0700

What are you constantly in need of?

Satiation!

Answer to How important do you think you are?

Sun, 27 Mar 2011 19:22:26 -0700

How important do you think you are?

How dare you ask me this question?

Answer to Who calls the shots in your house?

Sun, 27 Mar 2011 18:58:20 -0700

Who calls the shots in your house?

My neighbour's lifestyle!

Answer to What past U.S President would you want to share a beer with?

Sun, 27 Mar 2011 06:24:06 -0700

What past U.S President would you want to share a beer with?

There is a long list to drink the beer myself and give them the bottle!!

Answer to How do today's Hollywood stars compare to Elizabeth Taylor?

Thu, 24 Mar 2011 17:08:16 -0700

How do today's Hollywood stars compare to Elizabeth Taylor?

Alive!

Answer to There is a store that has everything you have ever lost. What is the first thing you want to reclaim?

Thu, 24 Mar 2011 15:58:43 -0700

There is a store that has everything you have ever lost. What is the first thing you want to reclaim?

my innocence.

Answer to Germans are best known for _________

Thu, 24 Mar 2011 15:52:51 -0700

Germans are best known for _________

Germs???...?

Answer to What would you want as the cause of your death?

Mon, 21 Mar 2011 18:14:27 -0700

What would you want as the cause of your death?

I wish I could die of joy; the kinda joy one feels upon his enemies death!

Answer to What is something that you have to see in order to believe?

Sun, 20 Mar 2011 18:00:47 -0700

What is something that you have to see in order to believe?

My thoughts!

Answer to Has there ever been a story about you in the newspaper?

Sun, 20 Mar 2011 04:53:49 -0700

Has there ever been a story about you in the newspaper?

The story of my life is being printed on flyers on a weekly basis.

Answer to What is something a woman would say but a man wouldn't?

Sun, 20 Mar 2011 04:04:45 -0700

What is something a woman would say but a man wouldn't?

Do you love her?

Answer to What is something you hated as a child, but you enjoy now?

Mon, 14 Mar 2011 14:48:55 -0700

What is something you hated as a child, but you enjoy now?

Making a child!

Answer to What is your favorite relaxing drink?

Fri, 11 Mar 2011 11:03:30 -0800

What is your favorite relaxing drink?

My tears!

Answer to March is the month to _______.

Thu, 10 Mar 2011 16:17:09 -0800

March is the month to _______.

march!

Answer to Royal Wedding Fever: Do you care about Prince William and Kate Middleton's wedding?

Tue, 08 Mar 2011 17:57:59 -0800

Royal Wedding Fever: Do you care about Prince William and Kate Middleton's wedding?

UKh

Answer to Is television getting worse?

Thu, 03 Mar 2011 17:29:37 -0800

Is television getting worse?

Only because the worst is being televised. That's all!

Answer to What are some of your favorite one-liners in any of movies you have seens?

Thu, 24 Feb 2011 00:45:34 -0800

What are some of your favorite one-liners in any of movies you have seens?

The End

Answer to How many roads must a man walk down, before you call him a man?

Sun, 13 Feb 2011 07:41:46 -0800

How many roads must a man walk down, before you call him a man?

She wouldn't care a bit, when he's walking down the aisle.

Answer to What do you call a route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing?

Sun, 13 Feb 2011 07:33:57 -0800

What do you call a route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing?

Autobiography

Answer to What is the best route to the truth?

Sun, 13 Feb 2011 07:32:36 -0800

What is the best route to the truth?

detour

Answer to What is one word that sums up your life as a whole?

Sat, 29 Jan 2011 14:08:45 -0800

What is one word that sums up your life as a whole?

is "dead-end" one word?

Answer to What's the most sensible thing you've ever heard anyone say?

Mon, 24 Jan 2011 17:08:15 -0800

What's the most sensible thing you've ever heard anyone say?

Me too.

Answer to Do you believe in open relationships?

Fri, 21 Jan 2011 04:21:26 -0800

Do you believe in open relationships?

Depends on which side it opens!

Answer to Do you think it's necessary to get married?

Fri, 21 Jan 2011 04:20:03 -0800

Do you think it's necessary to get married?

You don't usually "think" before marriage!

Answer to What have you built or made with your own hands?

Fri, 21 Jan 2011 04:17:26 -0800

What have you built or made with your own hands?

My own misery!

Answer to In the time of great sorrow, would you kindly justify a direction for me to suicide without burdening my beloved wife and daughter?

Sun, 21 Nov 2010 16:35:16 -0800

In the time of great sorrow, would you kindly justify a direction for me to suicide without burdening my beloved wife and daughter?

As long as you care for them, you are not suicidal. Don't kid a kidder!

Answer to Does money make you happy? is it neccessary to keep chasing more when you have enough to survive comfortably?

Thu, 18 Nov 2010 07:47:03 -0800

Does money make you happy? is it neccessary to keep chasing more when you have enough to survive comfortably?

Yes, it does. Does it keep me happy? No!

Answer to Is your personality the same online and offline?

Fri, 29 Oct 2010 12:14:25 -0700

Is your personality the same online and offline?

I have a more effective firewall, offline!

Answer to What do we need in order to be happy ?

Tue, 19 Oct 2010 03:14:22 -0700

What do we need in order to be happy ?

Our needs!

Answer to What's an opinion or belief that you hold with which many people probably disagree?

Fri, 15 Oct 2010 18:41:34 -0700

What's an opinion or belief that you hold with which many people probably disagree?

This one: Many people are disagreeable!

Answer to Who really discovered America?

Mon, 11 Oct 2010 12:06:16 -0700

Who really discovered America?

She was never covered to be discovered, neither was she hidden or lost to be found. The land was invaded. I...N...V...A...D...E...D. Everyone fills up the blank to his/her own liking.

Answer to I'm a white woman in love with a black man. What challenges should I be prepared to face both internally and externally in our relationship?

Mon, 11 Oct 2010 09:34:59 -0700

I'm a white woman in love with a black man. What challenges should I be prepared to face both internally and externally in our relationship?

Few inches! Please forgive my seemingly rude, otherwise statistically proven remark. On a more serious observation, this is the way I see it: The real challenge will be faced by your children...

Answer to Are you internally inclined to externally decline?

Mon, 11 Oct 2010 09:24:25 -0700

Are you internally inclined to externally decline?

I think you are a realistically idealist than an idealistically realist.

Answer to What is the biggest challenge today's teenagers have to face during those teen years?

Mon, 11 Oct 2010 09:20:15 -0700

What is the biggest challenge today's teenagers have to face during those teen years?

Being a teenager!

Answer to Is the government doing enough to ensure our nation's infrastructure (levees, bridges, etc.) is safe?

Tue, 28 Sep 2010 03:12:39 -0700

Is the government doing enough to ensure our nation's infrastructure (levees, bridges, etc.) is safe?

Levees and bridges are made and broken. A nation's true infrastructure is its spirit. Is your government maintaining it?

Answer to They are saying this recession ended in June 2009. I say they are crazy! Did I miss something?

Wed, 22 Sep 2010 17:15:46 -0700

They are saying this recession ended in June 2009. I say they are crazy! Did I miss something?

Was it really a recession, or was it in fact a financial meltdown?

Answer to Do you think the United Nations is of any use to anyone?

Tue, 21 Sep 2010 15:47:44 -0700

Do you think the United Nations is of any use to anyone?

It is. To the Dunkin' Donuts store across the street.

Answer to Why do Jews blow the rams horn? Does it have to do with the age of Aries the ram?

Fri, 17 Sep 2010 13:58:25 -0700

Why do Jews blow the rams horn? Does it have to do with the age of Aries the ram?

Because its easier to sell the ram horn on the Antique Roadshow, than selling a sax,etc.

Answer to What do you hope will NOT happen today?

Fri, 17 Sep 2010 10:30:41 -0700

What do you hope will NOT happen today?

Tomorrow!

Answer to Is sex safe?

Thu, 16 Sep 2010 19:46:20 -0700

Is sex safe?

Safe sex, is.

Answer to how do you make your penis from 3 inches to 15 inches

Thu, 16 Sep 2010 19:42:37 -0700

how do you make your penis from 3 inches to 15 inches

Measure it 5 times.

Answer to My girlfriend bought chunky peanut butter. I eat creamy peanut butter. Should she die?

Thu, 16 Sep 2010 19:38:54 -0700

My girlfriend bought chunky peanut butter. I eat creamy peanut butter. Should she die?

I'm a chunky myself with a creamy g/f. Let's swap the bitches.

Answer to What is a symbol to represent America?

Thu, 16 Sep 2010 15:45:27 -0700

What is a symbol to represent America?

A portrait of Marx bailing out Adam Smith.

Answer to Imagine you're you.

Thu, 16 Sep 2010 15:25:32 -0700

Imagine you're you.

It's funny. It happens every time I go in front of a mirror, then I'd say: "nah, I must be imagining!"

Answer to What kind of criminal do you most want behind bars?

Thu, 16 Sep 2010 15:17:30 -0700

What kind of criminal do you most want behind bars?

Lawyers

Answer to How important is forgiveness in human relationships?

Tue, 14 Sep 2010 14:46:10 -0700

How important is forgiveness in human relationships?

I don't ask for her forgiveness. Can't she at least try to forget what I did over 30 years ago?!

Answer to Who do you think can beat Obama in 2012 on the Republican side? In my opinion, the only Republicrats who have a chance to beat him and throw him out of

Sat, 11 Sep 2010 17:29:17 -0700

Who do you think can beat Obama in 2012 on the Republican side? In my opinion, the only Republicrats who have a chance to beat him and throw him out of

My heart goes out to GOP folks who are stuck with a retired porn star look-alike,called Palin; a maniac called Limbaugh, and a zambie called Jindal. Good Luck...

Answer to What is the funniest thing you've ever put in your purse?

Sat, 11 Sep 2010 09:05:52 -0700

What is the funniest thing you've ever put in your purse?

My paycheck. ( Actually, in my pocket!)

Answer to What is there not enough of in the world?

Fri, 10 Sep 2010 12:12:23 -0700

What is there not enough of in the world?

Abundance.

Answer to Do you think the Mosque near Ground Zero is truly intended as a place of worship, or simply an Islamic political victory front?

Thu, 09 Sep 2010 14:59:42 -0700

Do you think the Mosque near Ground Zero is truly intended as a place of worship, or simply an Islamic political victory front?

Everything in Islam is political. It's a political religion.

Answer to Are women's rights equal?

Wed, 25 Aug 2010 17:18:38 -0700

Are women's rights equal?

Some say it's equal, but not similar. Whatever it means...

Answer to Is it legal to carry a stun gun in Missouri?

Tue, 24 Aug 2010 12:30:37 -0700

Is it legal to carry a stun gun in Missouri?

But how can you possibly stun an already-stunned Republican there?

Answer to Is it legal to carry a gun in public without a concealed carry license?

Tue, 24 Aug 2010 12:20:54 -0700

Is it legal to carry a gun in public without a concealed carry license?

Logically,I assume it's legal to carry it in sight by someone who doesn't have a license to hide it!!

Answer to Recently, an Arizona politician proposed a bill that would make it legal for college students over the age of 21 who have "concealed-carry" liscenses to be able to carry their concealed weapon on school grounds.....Do you like this idea? Why or why not?

Tue, 24 Aug 2010 12:14:37 -0700

Recently, an Arizona politician proposed a bill that would make it legal for college students over the age of 21 who have "concealed-carry" liscenses to be able to carry their concealed weapon on school grounds.....Do you like this idea? Why or why not?

Who should care about guns? It's the bullet which kills.

Answer to Do you think single-sex schools are better for students than co-ed schools in grades K-12?

Tue, 24 Aug 2010 12:11:32 -0700

Do you think single-sex schools are better for students than co-ed schools in grades K-12?

Only if half of the students shave their leg, and the other half keep spitting all day.

Answer to What is the funniest question ever asked on Answerbag?

Tue, 24 Aug 2010 12:09:16 -0700

What is the funniest question ever asked on Answerbag?

What is the funniest question ever asked on Answerbag!

Answer to It has been five years since Hurricane Katrina. What lesson did you learn from that experience?

Tue, 24 Aug 2010 06:58:59 -0700

It has been five years since Hurricane Katrina. What lesson did you learn from that experience?

Living in the rich neighborhood.

Answer to Apparently 1 in 5 Americans still believe President Obama is a Muslim. How can that lie still be alive and well?

Thu, 19 Aug 2010 14:57:46 -0700

Apparently 1 in 5 Americans still believe President Obama is a Muslim. How can that lie still be alive and well?

By the conspiratorial efforts by the sixth American.

Answer to What is the superstition behind Friday the 13th?

Fri, 13 Aug 2010 12:56:48 -0700

What is the superstition behind Friday the 13th?

Saturday the 14th.

Answer to Does anyone have a problem with reverse polarity from the stars that make our thinking predominantly opposite of the formidable years?

Thu, 12 Aug 2010 16:59:56 -0700

Does anyone have a problem with reverse polarity from the stars that make our thinking predominantly opposite of the formidable years?

Of course not, Are you kidding me? I usually have no problem, when I don't understand the question.

Answer to What was the last thing you dropped or spilled on your keyboard?

Thu, 12 Aug 2010 16:54:09 -0700

What was the last thing you dropped or spilled on your keyboard?

My precious time!

Answer to What is Ramadan / Ramzan?

Wed, 11 Aug 2010 18:49:32 -0700

What is Ramadan / Ramzan?

To the westerners it's only another reminder of the virtue of oil, and wickedness of terrorists.

Answer to Do you think fishing is inhumane?

Mon, 09 Aug 2010 19:22:44 -0700

Do you think fishing is inhumane?

Not so much as hunger!

Answer to Do you think the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki was necessary or genocide?

Fri, 06 Aug 2010 16:09:55 -0700

Do you think the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki was necessary or genocide?

It looks like a genocide for the number( of dead per bomb! ), and necessary to proclaim America's military supremacy!

Answer to If we end up not 'winning' the Afghan war but just leaving, would that be considered a loss to us, like some consider Vietnam?

Wed, 04 Aug 2010 15:49:32 -0700

If we end up not 'winning' the Afghan war but just leaving, would that be considered a loss to us, like some consider Vietnam?

This time though just walk out. Don't run. Try to look cool, and casual. Don't rush out, and when you are on your way home; go on a short excursion over Iran, for dropping just a few bombs here and there in that barbaric country. Why not a quick tour to N. Korea, then. You see; this way you...

Answer to Why should parents take parenting classes?

Wed, 28 Jul 2010 15:22:24 -0700

Why should parents take parenting classes?

Because children are not born with an instruction book attached to them.

Answer to what do you think are the last thoughts o someone who knows they are going to die?

Tue, 27 Jul 2010 16:17:22 -0700

what do you think are the last thoughts o someone who knows they are going to die?

They think : "why these @#!$ing bastards wanna know what I'm thinking about? Can't I have some privacy at last?"

Answer to Is it bad to belive in God but not go to church or read the bible??

Tue, 27 Jul 2010 15:25:34 -0700

Is it bad to belive in God but not go to church or read the bible??

What does God have to do with church, or Bible?

Answer to this guy wants me to prove to him i'm different from other girls. and why he should date me. what do i say?

Tue, 27 Jul 2010 09:29:57 -0700

this guy wants me to prove to him i'm different from other girls. and why he should date me. what do i say?

Just tell him he can have sex with you while you are cooking a meal for him, or when you are doing his laundry, or sewing his socks. Or even better, tell him you can't wait for jumping into bed with him after a long tiresome day at work, where you try to make some money for his booze, and dope....

Answer to If a nuclear bomb exploded in NY or DC and there was evidence that it was the work of rogue elements in the govt of Iran or North Korea (or at least the rogue elements passed the weapon to terrorists), what should the US do?

Sun, 25 Jul 2010 13:53:23 -0700

If a nuclear bomb exploded in NY or DC and there was evidence that it was the work of rogue elements in the govt of Iran or North Korea (or at least the rogue elements passed the weapon to terrorists), what should the US do?

Making "Operation El Dorado Canyon" look like a child game.

Answer to Which of the recent presidents would you want to be in the hot seat with 12 min. to decide how to respond to an apparent nuclear attack?

Sat, 24 Jul 2010 04:25:40 -0700

Which of the recent presidents would you want to be in the hot seat with 12 min. to decide how to respond to an apparent nuclear attack?

There is no such thing as a "response" to a nuclear attack. And I don't know how they are different from one another in their instinctive reactionary system.

Answer to How long do you think the War On Terrorism will continue to be?

Fri, 23 Jul 2010 16:46:46 -0700

How long do you think the War On Terrorism will continue to be?

All depends on the definition of terrorism.

Answer to What is your favorite memory of the beach?

Thu, 22 Jul 2010 16:48:17 -0700

What is your favorite memory of the beach?

It's the sun of a beach

Answer to Does anybody really know why we are in Afghanistan?

Mon, 19 Jul 2010 13:44:26 -0700

Does anybody really know why we are in Afghanistan?

Because the Vietnam war is over!

Answer to What did you learn from your first summer job?

Fri, 16 Jul 2010 16:41:03 -0700

What did you learn from your first summer job?

...That winter is better.

Answer to Why is viagra blue?

Fri, 25 Jun 2010 19:25:12 -0700

Why is viagra blue?

To reflect that awkward instantaneous feeling of void which follows the ejaculation. Or is it me, only?!!

Answer to Why are Greeks so dark? Are they Europeans?

Fri, 25 Jun 2010 16:08:38 -0700

Why are Greeks so dark? Are they Europeans?

Stop it, you silly. This is not Answerfag.com!

Answer to Would you have liked to be your own child?

Fri, 25 Jun 2010 11:27:28 -0700

Would you have liked to be your own child?

Nope! I need more allowance, as a child!

Answer to Is anyone else tired of people who cite Wikipedia as if it were an actual authority?

Thu, 24 Jun 2010 18:32:04 -0700

Is anyone else tired of people who cite Wikipedia as if it were an actual authority?

I call them wikilectuals!

Answer to Who's to blame for the resurgence of the Taliban in Afghanistan?

Wed, 23 Jun 2010 17:56:56 -0700

Who's to blame for the resurgence of the Taliban in Afghanistan?

Partly, the Pakistan's army.

Answer to What were women's rights in Afghanistan prior to the Taliban?

Wed, 23 Jun 2010 17:54:33 -0700

What were women's rights in Afghanistan prior to the Taliban?

Despite popular belief the puppet governments which were set up by the support of the Soviet Union, made substantial improvement on the women's status, and their equality. It is true that Afghanistan is a tribal society, but the Afghan women were never suppressed in the past as much as they are now.

Answer to Are summer jobs good for teenagers?

Tue, 22 Jun 2010 20:20:49 -0700

Are summer jobs good for teenagers?

only on rainy days!

Answer to How did the Father's Day tradition start?

Sat, 19 Jun 2010 17:28:18 -0700

How did the Father's Day tradition start?

An intercourse!

Answer to Two things you can't live without?

Fri, 18 Jun 2010 17:12:39 -0700

Two things you can't live without?

Saturday, and Sunday.

Answer to Two things you can't live without?

Fri, 18 Jun 2010 17:11:10 -0700

Two things you can't live without?

Saturday, and Sunday.

Answer to Who was America`s greatest president after Ronald Reagan?

Fri, 18 Jun 2010 09:29:21 -0700

Who was America`s greatest president after Ronald Reagan?

Reagan was the last president of the United States...Make it the real president...

Answer to What is the secular argument against gays in the military?

Thu, 17 Jun 2010 19:37:43 -0700

What is the secular argument against gays in the military?

The enemy appearing as cute!

Answer to What is that one thing you cannot live with?

Thu, 17 Jun 2010 16:35:01 -0700

What is that one thing you cannot live with?

My death!

Answer to Would you rather have a male boss or a female boss or doesn't it matter and why?

Tue, 15 Jun 2010 18:14:27 -0700

Would you rather have a male boss or a female boss or doesn't it matter and why?

Why are you making a distinction between a bitch, and her son?

Answer to Two things you can't live without?

Tue, 15 Jun 2010 18:06:46 -0700

Two things you can't live without?

Me, and myself.