- NEW!
Answer to:
I smell bread, where am I?
At the bar with the Pillsbury Dough Boy.....
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What was the last thing you cooked in butter?
Fried egg...that's the only way the wife will eat her eggs is if I cook them in butter....strange she is.....
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Wayne Newton called..he wants _____________________
"Red roses for a blue lady"
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What spreads quickly?
My ex wife....
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Quick...name a food that begins with the letter O?
Oatmeal/oats
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
___ is a famous picker.
Mike Wolfe and Frank Fritz (are famous) pickers.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why's your hair red?
Someone must be looking through rose colored glasses...eh?
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
which song most reminds you of the "happier times" in your life?In childhood or adulthood?
The Lion Sleeps Tonight....brings back many memories!
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
What a difference ___________makes !?
an extra inch
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Answer to:
Did I ever hurt someone's feelings here? If so I apologize. I may leave Ab soon and I don't want to leave ill-feelings when I do. Thanks!
You'll hurt my feelings if ya leave.....
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Which one do you like to put on your eggs? Salt or pepper?
Both, with some Jolokia hot sauce to give it some kick.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Did you ever break bread?
A few times...I have also broke wind...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can you ____________ it?
get jiggy with
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Are you bullet proof
Nope, a 22 found my right leg back in 1975...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How often do you see your brothers and sisters?
Older brother, 3 or 4 times a month (lives about 2 miles from me), younger brother about 10 times a year (lives about 50 miles from me). Oldest younger sister maybe twice a year (lives about 1,600 miles from me) and youngest sister maybe 15 times a year (lives about 20 miles from me).
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Answer to:
Don't stand in my way ... I'm on my way to _______________!!!
Joe's Crab Shack
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Answer to:
Why are there only 99 bottles of beer on the bus?
I took one down and passed it around...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why do you have a fire hydrant in the middle of your living room?
Got to, it's not easy living with a pyromaniac.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How big are they?
Big enough that I have to buy an extra seat on the plane.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I want a bag of _______ for Christmas.
Doubloon's
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever lost your wallet and i.d.?
Thankfully no...I have misplaced them a few times, but always ended up finding it.
Answer to:
Will you sacrifice an animal for Christmas?
Mmmmm ham...yup
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can you try not to touch my foods?
I'll give it a try, but I cant guarantee it.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Would you buy a used cow?
I guess it depends on how it was used...With the price of beef, it might just be worth it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever got lost in the lingerie section of a department store?
Once when I was in the bra section and I fell into a booby trap.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Influenza and out flew _______? Phil N. Dablank.
Dogma
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What's something that's hot?
Bhut Jolokia
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
if you woke up one day and a giant banana was next to you, what would you do?
Get the hell out of there before King Kong comes back to claim that giant banana.
Answer to:
Is it time right now 2 ?
Sure is, would you like 1?
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
So it was I. Who cares?
So it was you, who knew?
Answer to:
Do you like to eat meat without salt?
Must have salt...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What's something that glows?
Lightning bugs
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Which is your favourite nut?
The twins...ok...2nd favorite is Cashew!
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
And then i saw her face. Now i'm ________________
getting the hell out of here.
| 7 people like this
Answer to:
could you Name a dog breed...? please?
Portuguese Water Dog
Answer to:
Should coffee be taken rectally?
I guess the Barista would have to also be a Proctologist.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Given the choice, will you have kids?
Done did that! 2 boys, 2 girls. But the choice now would be no now since the Dr. took care of that problem 20 years ago with a snip here and a snip there...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is an Alpenhorn?
Riiiiiiiii-co-laaaaaaa
Answer to:
What is not your cup of tea?
A peanut butter, mayo, banana and jelly sandwich. But it is my sons.
Answer to:
Which song comes to mind when i say "Black"?
AC/DC's Back in Black
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Who is that man in the long red suit with the long white beard ?
That's uncle Larry, just ignore him and he will eventually go away.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is something that is green in your house
The glass that I'm drinking out of right now.
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Answer to:
Have you ever been to tired to _____________________?!?!
fall asleep
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Answer to:
what else can a salad fork be used for
to help get the knot out of the kids shoes shoelaces.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can Ozzy _______________ an Aussie?
sing like
Answer to:
What's your opinion on nipple piercings?
To each his own...but not for me!
Answer to:
Do you know someone like this: they say they prefer their home cooking to eating out.Have they tried all the restaurants to eat out then?!
I am one of those people. I have not tried all the restaurants, would be very hard to do that, but I just prefer my cooking...I know who has handled it and what is in it etc.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever picked up a grown pit bull in your arms?
Many times...Have owned a pit and have family and friends that own pits.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is better in black and white?
Oreo cookies
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Are you ready for another new year?
I guess, I just see it as another year.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do your parents in law, stick their nose everywhere
Thankfully no...have had these in laws since 1983 and I can not think of one time that they stuck their noses into our business...
Answer to:
What is something that you should not give as a gift to a newborn baby?
Power tools
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
When did you last change a diaper?
2 weeks ago while my granddaughter was here.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. It has been snowing here for hours. How about where you are?
Just lots of rain right now...though it did snow a few days ago.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
I ate ________________ for breakfsat this morning
nothing
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Answer to:
have you ever been discombobulated?
I would have to say more than once.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What makes your chili so good?
Venison and Jolokia peppers.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you have something you want to tell me?
That you should never take a bath in gasoline while smoking a cigarette.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How can I tell if my head is on fire?
If the neighborhood kids are holding sticks with marshmallows on the end over your head.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What kind of question wakes you up?
Ya wanna?
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever eaten deep fried elephant toes?
No, but I have had Elephant ears...Here's the recipe. http://simplyrecipes.com/recipes/palmiers_elephant_ears/
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What bed time is early for you?
11pm would be early for me...I usually hit the hay between 12am and 1am.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What do you think a cow is thinking when its being milked?
Plop plop fizz fizz oh what a relief it is.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
When is a baby wrong?
When he/she waits to go to the bathroom right after you take off its diaper.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Get _______.
Shorty
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Answer to:
Can you name a holiday named after someone?
Martin Luther King
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How many days a week do you stay in and not go outside the front door at all?
I very seldom ever go out the front door...we use the back door.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why are you not reading my messages?
Sorry, I shut my Telepathy switch off years ago because it was giving me headaches...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
what is your most shucking secret? just indicate it, not reveal it!
Shucking field corn and telling the kids it was older sweet corn.
Answer to:
Why did you take my newspaper?
Needed something to read while sitting on the throne...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
How old were you when you got your license?
16
Answer to:
Do gnats piss you off when they start flying around your food?
Darn right...I'm not sharing my food with them...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Rock 'n' roll and brew and _________? What is the third thing YOU need to make your life complete?
duct tape
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever experienced technical difficulties while passing a motion?
While intoxicated...yes.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Would PICK YOUR NOSE be a good name for a rhinoplasty service I want to set up in my front yard?
I can see the rest of the sign... Come on in and let us help you pick your nose...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What's the frequernt hiding place of Hendersonula?
The feet/toenails
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you store cups upside down or not?
All are stored upside down.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Can you name the three wise men?
Jim, Jack and Jose...makes one heck of a shot.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How do you feel when you forget someone's name? What do you do if you see a person you recognize and can't rememebr their name?
I am horrible with names...I just say Hi, how ya doing...and hope the lil lady is with me so she can whisper in my ear and tell me who it is...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Why do we never see snowwomen?
But you do see an occasional one around in this part of the woods.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you own the residence you live in right now or are you renting? Have you always been a renter?
Own and paid off for the last 5 years.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you need the cops to be around 24/7 for you to feel safe?
No...In this little town you are lucky to see a cop 24 times in 7 years.
Answer to:
I am making a snowman .What should I name him?
John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Just because _________, it doesn't mean _________ .
Just because I said it, doesn't mean it's the truth.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
I just need one more ____________________________
pitcher of beer and I can call it a night.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What would not belong in a nativity scene?
A goldfish.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What is the weather like where you are at?
34 degrees and overcast, but finally it quit raining,
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Stay here,order a pizza and ________________________?
chill with Pretty_Lilly!
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Please tell me where are you from?
Originally from Florida, living in Illinois...Hello neighbor!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is something a person should not take their sweet time doing?
Moving out of the path of a tornado.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
When was the last time that you lost control of your mouth?
After the last tooth I had pulled from the injections that the dentist gave me.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Why does my African steak taste and smell so differently?
Because of the type of dung they use for the bbq.
Answer to:
What is your Favorite song from 1987?
Lean On Me, Club Nouveau
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Would you eat this steak?
I would, though it looks to over cooked for me.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Im so ____Im feeling so _____ although Im so _____ Ill have another ______.
I'm so stuffed, I'm feeling so bad...although I'm so full, I'll have another slab.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What was Frankenstein's famous last words?
But soon," he cried with sad and solemn enthusiasm, "I shall die, and what I now feel be no longer felt. Soon these burning miseries will be extinct. I shall ascend my funeral pile triumphantly and exult in the agony of the torturing flames. The light of that conflagration will fade away; my ashes will be swept into the sea by the winds. My spirit will sleep in peace, or if it thinks, it will...
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What was Santa's Dad's name?
Crispy Cringle
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Of the good cooks from TV long ago, who would you like to cook for you, Aunt Bea, June Cleaver or Hop Sing?
The AB Mrs. Clever...but Aunt Bea of old...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Why are you taking off your clothes?
It's easier to take a shower this way.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
"You crossed a line." When would you feel this way? Why?
After she slaps me...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Where is Sherlock Home's...hehe
He's with Waldo...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Okay they say God's crying when it rains, so what he doing when it snows?
Scratching the dandruff off of his scalp.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I can't believe that you took me to see _______.
the submarine races...I nearly drowned.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Who had the FIRST EVER automobile accident? And what caused it? Google is no help at all with this question. Thanks!
The world's first automobile accident occurred in Ohio City, Ohio in 1891.
Throughout most of the twentieth century, the city of Detroit, Michigan, was synonymous with American automobile manufacturing. In the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries, that was not the case. Instead, Ohio innovators in Cleveland and elsewhere were at the forefront of this new form of transportation...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Can you almost touch your thumb to your finger around your ankle?
When I use both hands...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Wanna bet on it being a White Christmas this year?
It will be a White Christmas somewhere for sure...more times than not it is here.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is not clear?
Dog poo...or any poo!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
According to research...Over 80% of adults will buy this before the end of the year. What?
2012 Calendar
| 7 people like this
Answer to:
How can I lose fifteen pounds before daylight?
Lose it in a poker game in Britain.
Answer to:
Does Lady Gaga make you horny?
No, but she sure makes me want to smash the lil feller with a hammer.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What do you do if a guy in your neighborhood keeps throwing you into a swimming pool while you are asleep?
Stay awake
Answer to:
what's the one thing that you want for christmas that you know you won't receive.
My estranged son to call me. Have not heard from him in 15 years.
Answer to:
Whats a word that starts with the letter "Z"?
Zinfandel
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
How far is Round Table Pizza from your house?
Pretty far I guess...never heard of it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever seen a real monster that hides in your closet?
Not since I divorced her...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How many times a week do you get it?
It comes 5 times a week...I just hate having to go to the post office to get it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you have a middle name?
Why yes...yes I do!
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Where Is Dildo ??
Chasing the Energizer Bunny...
Answer to:
Are there things you are doing against your will? What are they?
Taxes...mainly property taxes...I mean, I own the property free and clear...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What would you do if a guy dressed up as Santa Claus keeps shoving hotdogs down your pants everyday?
Have a wienie roast...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Mastercard. Visa, Discover or American Express? What's in your wallet?
Wish I had none...but a Mastercard and a Visa hide out in my wallet.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What do you do if a guy dressed as Sasquatch keeps on shoving ice cream down your pants everyday?
Put on an extra pair of thermal underwear...gets kinda cold down there with all that ice cream.
Answer to:
Have you ever stepped out of your fashion comfort zone?
Yeah, wore a suit to a wedding...sucked big time...
Answer to:
What's your natural position?
Depends on her mood...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
am looking forward to__________?
this weekend...the granddaughters are coming to visit.
Answer to:
Sausage or bacon for breakfast?
Preferably bacon, but occasionally sausage...that's if I even eat breakfast.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Autumn leaves. Have you done some raking yet?
I don't rake the leaves...I let either mother nature (wind) or my granddaughter to take care of them, whichever gets to them first.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Alright to make this clear I have a 17,14,13,12,11,9, and 5 year old any comments?
You've been busy.
Answer to:
Something wrong with my goldfish.
Could be fungus...Check out a goldfish forum and check around there to see if you can get the information you need.
Answer to:
bridge _________________
over troubled waters
| 9 people like this
Answer to:
What if she refuses?
Cattle Prod...she will listen then.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can you describe the last poop you took using only the title of a movie?
The Blob
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
hvfb59bv46w5986gtv$$^%8t786b547 59n0 htiphyjunvjyu509 nyuv0u5ythjuhghhhhh
Very interesting concept!
Answer to:
I ringed your doorbell 5 times! What were you doing!?
I was at your place ringing your door bell 10 times.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever eaten cottage cheese & green olives?
I have eaten both, but not together.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Name some things that both religious and non-religious people agree on.
The "agree" to "disagree".
Answer to:
What is one food that when unexpectedly served right in front of you, you would want to throw against the wall?
Since you said "want to throw" and not, would throw....Hominy...YUCK!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I love this ___________?
bar
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What Indian name would you make up for your significant other? Ex: Peesalot.
She would be "Squat-to-pee"
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
If you're tall, do you... wait for it... PLAY BASKETBALL?? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahaha!!! Heh.
At 6'5", I don't play basketball...Maybe I'm to short.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Did you like being an A__ole?
An Anole? Never thought about being a lizard...
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
How big is your rear end?
Big enough that the D.O.T. makes me put a "Wide Load" sign on the front and back.
Answer to:
What is the number one item on your holiday wish list?
Obviously my kids...they must be high to think I'm gonna get them what they have at the top of their Christmas list...
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
More fun than a ________________
tornado at a trailer park.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What will you do in bed tonight?
Not sure how it will start...but know how it will end...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Answer to:
A bad response to 'I'm pregnant' would be? (humor welcomed)
"Is it yours"?
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What is something that you would not allow a nerd to do?
Borrow my pocket protector...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Our Father who art in ___________
The Maury Povich Show...you are "NOT" the father.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
How do you deal with two wise guy's who show up at your front door?
Show them the back door!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Where have all the G-Men gone?
They've gone to "H"
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is something you tried once and will never try again?
Stag beer...never again. Yuck!!
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What is something you own that you wish I would just drive up with a big truck and haul away???
An old smoke house that I have been wanting to tear down for some time now.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
How do you plead?
The 5th
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What do you dislike about Jehovah's Witnesses the most?
They always show up at the worst times...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why do black people call Walmart "Wally World" which is not proper?
Uh, well...I call it Wally World... and the last time I looked, I was white...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do u have brain bugs?
Hopefully my brain farts will keep them away...
Answer to:
How much do you drink these days?
A pitcher of beer a couple of times a week at the local bar...unless the grand kids are here, then I skip the bar and my pitchers.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
XXII – Question: Do you think Turkeys long for xmas and Thanksgiving?
They've got a couple of legs up on it...
Answer to:
Do you like seafood?
I have eaten many many different kinds of seafood...but my all time favorite is Snow Crab and Shrimp.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
What signs indicate that the end times are approaching?
When the bartender yells "Last Call"...
Answer to:
Can you survive without the remote?
Sure, I can always get the s/o to get up and change the channel for me...
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What are some good football (American football) movies?
An oldy, but goody..."Brian's Song"
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
XXIX – Question: Ever eaten quails?
Yes...quite tasty, just not much meat.
Answer to:
"Don't Step out of line" What does that mean to you?
Behave as you are ordered or expected to...
or
If you step out of line you will lose your place.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is NOT part of a healthy breakfast?
A bucket of lard.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is one thing you own that you can guarantee I don't have?
My car...if it's "MY" car, there's no way that you have it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
have you ever lost money?
In several different ways...yes.
Answer to:
Are you a skilful cook?
I believe so...started learning how to cook since I was 7 years old...been cooking 43 years now and love it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How do you handle being yelled at?
I just smile and then ask them "Are you done"?
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
How old were you last year?
48/49
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What's an unconventional thing to do on a beach?
Roller skate
Answer to:
Have you ever been the only one naked in a room full of people?
On the operating table...yes.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Knock 3 times on the ceiling if you want me, twice on the pipe if the answer is no, and once on the _______ if _______.
door
you mean it.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever gone to the beach during winter?
Many times when I lived in Florida...only lived 2 miles inland from the beach.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is the best thing to do on a cold windy day?
Stay inside and watch a movie with the grand kids.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
When was the last time you did someone a 'solid'?
Yesterday when my son said he needed to borrow my car to get to work because he had a flat on his truck. So I let him use my car.
Answer to:
Those that shout loudest______________?
don't want to hear others opinions.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How would you react if you walked by this guy? (See video in description)
Call the whitecoats.
Answer to:
Ya...UnicornMans just reached "Maestro"...Who is going to join me in Congratulating him on his Monumental Achievement...Wahooooo
Congrats Unicornman on the Maestrodom.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
When does This become His ??.....hehe
After you take away his T.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What are your plans for Friday night?
Traveling to pick up the grand daughters to keep them for a week.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
About how far can I push you before you lose it?
About a quarter of an inch from the ledge...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is the opposite of morning wouldn't?
Hahaha....Evening Wood...er I mean would.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Everything goes well when______________?
Mama's happy.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
VII – Question: Ever been bitten by a snake, how was it?
More times then I can count. As a kid I was always out catching snakes...and they seemed to tag me more often then not. Does not really hurt but itches some as time goes by, but sure does startle ya when they get ya.
Answer to:
Have you tried Pho yet?
Many years ago...It was worth eating, just nowhere around here to get it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
would you change your gender?
Heck no, I can barely walk in tennis shoes...
Answer to:
Ouch! I just cut myself _______.
buttering bread...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you care if there is a NBA season? I think I can live without it, how about yiu?
Not an NBA fan...so nope, don't care.
Answer to:
On what day of the week does the garbage truck come by to pick up garbage for you?
Whatever day I have enough to take to the dump...usually Saturday.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What does the voice inside your head tell you?
Lions tigers and bears, oh my...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Just where on Earth did you get that gigantic ___________?
thingamajiggy
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is something you hope to accomplish by your next birthday?
Seeing that next birthday!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you like left or right?
I prefer 2nd base.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Holy Sh*t! What's that on your head!?
That's my pet tarantula.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
You see a dollar bill lying on the sidewalk, do you lift it and put it in your wallet/pocket or do you keep on walking?
I pick it up and keep on walking.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Is yours an inny or an outy?
Born with an inny, work gave me an outy, the surgeon then gave me back my inny.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
If you fed beans to the birds and made them fart -would that help them to fly faster?
I don't know, but there would beano more fresh air.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I almost saw her (his) _____________ but _____________ got in the way!!
I almost saw her jugs, but the wife got in the way!!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Get outta my _______
garden you wascally wabbit.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
The rain in Spain _________________________
does not smell as much like fish like it does in Main.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Another word for_______ is_______
ca ca, doo doo, poo poo and number two
crap
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
How much would you pay to have unlimited money for life?
Fitty cent.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Can you hold your own?
Takes both hands...but yes.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
If you stumbled across a baby alien, what would you name him?
Guadalupe Esquivel Garcia
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever painted the town red?
I have tried a few times, but usually it is quite hard to do it while bent over the toilet.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Do you love fried garlic shrimp?
I like any shrimp...as long as there is no coconut with it.
Answer to:
What is a subject of conversation you shouldn't have at the dinner table?
About the dutch oven that has the soup cooking in it had granny's "Depends" soaking in it the night before.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
If you heard the name "Bubba" what would come to mind?
First thing would be my son, being that is what his nieces call him "Uncle Bubba".
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you use any lotion at all?
When I give the s/o a back massage....
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why is it that all the Christians at school are nice, and then they figure out I'm an Atheist and they hate me.
Hmmm...."All" Christians?...I judge no one.
Answer to:
I wanna know as I'm sure others would as well, have you ever seen the rain?
Shinin' down like water...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How would you feed an "Amphisbaena"...
Very carefully...you don't know which end will bite ya.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How old are you?
50 for a little longer.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Can anyone tell me what are DeKalb Schools?
I guess it means schools in DeKalb, or DeKalb county....
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
She,s had so many face lifts,theres nothing left in her_______________?
body to hold her head up.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Is there someone not related to you that you call Aunt or Uncle?
Yes, there are a few of my parents friends that we have always called Aunt and Uncle.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Stop it,you're making me _________?
write bad checks.
Answer to:
What did you see that you wish you could unsee but can't?
My ex wife.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
The last time I was drunk I _________?
obviously had way to much to frink.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Did you find what you were digging for?
No, that darn wedgie is still there.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
'Ping'! What happened?
Lids are sealing on my canning jars.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What should not be on your plate for dinner tonight?
Earthworm pate.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Stop eating my _____________!
thin mints
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Stop drinking my ___________!
Brooks ketchup
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Are you loyal to Tobasco sauce or Frank's Hot Sauce? Or do you use them interchangeably?
I use many different brands of hot sauce...but of the two you ask, Tobasco would be the one I would pick...but no loyalty. I actually prefer my homemade hot sauces.
Answer to:
What is the best pickle's brand? Do you like pickles?
I could eat my weight in Claussen's
Answer to:
What foods are the British famous for around the world?
Black pudding
Kippers
Pork Pie
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Do you enjoy the company of your pet?
Very much so...If they were not around, I'd probably go insane.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
I woke up to the sound of ____________
the coffee pot gurgling before the s/o headed off to work.
Answer to:
Will you skinny dip with me?
Sure, and the rest of the Polar Bear club...
Answer to:
Would you insert your finger into a hole just to find out what's inside of it?
Sure...why not? How else are we gonna find out if we found the mother load or not.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Will you call me? We really need to talk.
I forgot which psychiatric hospital you're at...refresh my memory please...
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
could you live the rest of your life on 1 million dollars
I'm sure I could, just wish I had the chance to find out.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
I smell ____ on your breath.
a peanutbutter, jelly, mayonnaise and banana sandwich
Answer to:
Do you like Jim Croce's songs? Why or why not? If so, which song is your favorite?
His life was to short, a great musician. I like all his songs, but "I got a name" is on the top of the list.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What would happen if I XT'd someone?
The person that got T'd would be owed an explanation from XT for getting T'd.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What do you say when you gotta go poo? I've heard some funny sayings before.
(this is for fun). :)
Dump a lump
Taking the browns to the super bowl
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
what happens if you sit on a bag of chips / crisps?
You will have crumby dreams when you go to bed.
Answer to:
Do UFOs really exist?
Unidentified flying objects..yes, there are plenty of things that are unidentified...but do I believe in Alien space ships....eh...not until I see one myself.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you remember the D.A.R.E program in grade school?
No D.A.R.E. program when I was in school, but remember it from when the kids and grand kids were in school.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
So, I'm naked. Now what?
Stay away from open flames.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you know how much money you have in your wallet/purse?
Zero, zilch, nadda...If I leave money in my wallet, it's gone before I get to use it...so no money kept in my wallet.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
I had a dream about Snooki, blue cheese, burnt toast, and a roller coaster. What does it mean?
It means you are going to end up on the Jerry Springer show.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
OK,I just gave you a little buzz !
What would your reaction be ?
Swat you with the fly swatter.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Finish this phrase: I love...
I love little baby ducks, old pick up trucks, slow moving trains and rain...And I love you too. According to Tom T. Hall that is.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
_________ is small enough to fit in the ____________
Gilbert Gottfried
person known as...Rosie O'Donnell
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Based on what you now know, what were you in a former life?
Spermatozoa...tadpole
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How would you react if you saw a person flying in the air by flapping his arms?
Find where he got all the helium and join him.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
So, how has your electricity been for you lately?
Shockingly priced.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
what is the name of this animal? pls tell me if u know
Possibly a black macaque
Answer to:
What do you think was the worst comedy film ever? Tell us so we can avoid it ;)
Freddy Got Fingered
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you REALLY know what's going on?
I try to stay in the know.
Answer to:
Are you hurting?
Pulled side muscle is giving me some discomfort right now...and my eyes and lungs don't feel so good right now...just got done making some Bhut Jolokia hot sauce and the fumes can do a trick on ya...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Hey, what did you eat earlier? Did you enjoy it?
I just got done making 16 pints of green tomato piccallili (relish) and some Bhut Jolokia hot sauce and tested them both, but that is all that I have had to eat today.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why do you hate flying?
My arms get tired.
I love flying.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Are you ___________ me right now?
wooing
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Finish this: Woohoo! I'm ______________!
Mr. Magoo
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
when was the last time you touched your toes?
This morning when I took a shower.
Answer to:
Your _____ is on fire!
girlfriend
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is something that you have never done in your life? But would like to do?
Be a millionaire.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can I pinch your nipples?
Only the ones on the baby bottle, but make sure your hands are clean first.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
How did you pay the milk man?
With my milk money.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Let's do a shot of _____.
Mezcal
Answer to:
Please _______ after _______.
rinse off your plate
you finish eating.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Why do I keep asking all these dumb questions?
Someone has to do it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Please _______ before _______.
Please be a sweetie and wipe the seatie before leaving the bathroom.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
_____ makes my butt hurt.
Ghost Chili Peppers
or
Hemroids
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Run run run as fast as you can, you can't catch me I'm ____________
Speedy Gonzales
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What can you say about a "Blue Moon"?
I saw it once.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What do you ceribate while sitting on the bowl?
I celebrate another complete cycle of poodom.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can you answer this question in French?
Bien sûr, je peux le faire!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Apart from too many calories, what are other reasons not to eat more than 8 bananas per day?
I wont have enough left to make banana pudding.
Answer to:
How do you do the voodoo that you do?
I do it to it like Pruit would do it to it.
Answer to:
Is "Electrocution" a shocking thing to say to someone....hehe
What an electrifying question...Shockingly so.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
The Dummies Guide To ________?
the "ANY" key
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Knock, knock. Who's there? Woody. Woody who? Woody _______?
Woody Wood, that's who...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Why were people so shocked when they arrived at the wedding?
It was clothing optional.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What are you wearing at this exact moment?
Boxers and a Big Dogs T-shirt
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Were you saved by the bell?
Yes...I was always late to one of my classes on purpose. The bell would ring, I would poke my head into the class room and old Ms. Kelley would point to the principals office. I liked being in the principals office more than in her class.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Guys! How often do you change your boxers?
Let's see...what year is it?
Every day.
Answer to:
Wheres my cat?
Last I saw of him he was visiting the neighbors pit bull.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What can you see from your front yard?
Woods, horses and an occasional deer.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Can I change the radio station?
Well, you will have to turn it on first.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
There wasn't much food in the Garden of Eden..so Eve ate Adam's__________
(hey this is just for fun!!)
Oscar Mayer
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
When was the last time your phone rang?
Couple of hours ago.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
May cause_________________
blindness, please remove spoon before drinking.
Answer to:
This coffee is so strong it's dissolving _______________________
my stomach lining.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What makes your "Blood boil"....
Drunk Drivers
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Can you give me a rotten answer?
Week old road kill
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How are my "Bluchers"..?....hehe
Have not seen them in person... but I'm sure they fit you well.
Answer to:
Would you take me to your nearest Blind Pig ? ....hehe... Please...
Best I can do is lead you to the ham in the fridge, it can't see either.
Answer to:
Are you or have you ever been a "Bowsie"....
Nope, but I know a few.
Answer to:
Who's your favorite Blimp....??
Dom Deluise...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you Brachiate often....hehe
Not much anymore, arms get to tired.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Where's your Calaboose....hehe
In the dungeon...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
As the King cut open the pie 4 and 20 black birds flew out..and all that was left was a lot of _____________________
bird poo
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
While Pinocchio was sleeping..his girlfriend ____________________ his nose.
Uh...straddled.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What would the name of your next newborn child be?
It would have to be Miracle since I took care of that problem 20 years ago.
Answer to:
If your mom is the answer, then what's the question?
One of the people that love me unconditionally.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What does King Kong use as a tooth pick?
Palm Trees
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
____________ ford
Tennessee Ernie Ford
Answer to:
Did Perry end it all last night?
Brain cramp stopped him for finishing his point. leadership materal?
Huh, guess he should have used a teleprompter.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
what are you loving?
Right now...the cooler weather...means very few insects.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
what is the funniest movie you think you have ever seen?
My all time favorite is Blazing Saddles..
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why not give up, why keep going?
To stubborn to.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What was the first automobile you can remember riding in? What do you remember about the vehicle or about the experience?
55 Chevy Wagon
I learned how to drive in this car when I was 9 years old. Dad would let us take it out in the orange groves and drive...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is something that you would not throw?
Baby/child
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
What's the second letter of alphabet?
Farfegnugen
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Since you're so sarcastic, why are you still alive???
Because only the good die young.
Answer to:
Get some _______ because _______.
blankets
you're sleeping on the couch tonight.
| 8 people like this
Answer to:
What do you usually say when you want someone to get lost?
Just that..."Get Lost".
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you have Sonic restaurant at your location?
Nope, closest one is 40 miles from me.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
If you can't __________ then don't _________!
If you can't run with the big dogs, then don't get off of the porch.
| 7 people like this
Answer to:
How long do you keep someone as an acquaintance before you let them be your friend? A day, a week, a month, six months?
Acquaintance: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from but not well enough to lend to...so...More than six months.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
If Jack Black can eat no fat and his wife can eat no lean, how do they agree on a menu for lunch?
And so betwixt the two of them
They went to Dairy Queen
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Would you mind diagnosing me with something?
Not until you take two swigs of this Vitameatavegamin...then ask again in the morning.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever gotten a speeding ticket?? Were you sad when you got it??
Last speeding ticket was in 1992. doing 72 in a 55. Was not sad, just pissed that I would have to pay the fine, but was my fault...he was only doing his job. He did make it a little more enjoyable when he mentioned to me about the bumper sticker on the back of my truck. It said "I'm not speeding, I'm qualifying".
Answer to:
Have you ever thought of using a rooster as an alarm clock?
Never thought of using one, but the neighbors rooster does the job.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Let your _______________ do the ________________
hair down and
wahtoosie
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you need to use both of your hands to hold it?
Well I'm afraid if I don't it will fall to the floor.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can I win?
Well I have won 32 straight...so yes, you can win this time.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What will happen if I don't do it?
Well if you don't do it your face will be froze in that position forever.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Would you like a kids meal?
Sure, as long as that kids meal includes snow crab...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Would you like to sit on my lap?
You playing Santa again?
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
No more drinks for you okay?
Why? You shink iz had to mush to frink? hic Peas can I haz yust one mo. hic
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Are you trying to bite my finger?!
Yes, I love finger sandwiches.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is one thing that you prefer to be small? Goodnight!....
My debt.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What are you most proud of?
My children and grand children.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What are you known for in your family ?
Many things, but I like to think that I am known quite well for my culinary abilities.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Can you think of a pretty girls' name that begins with M ?
Makenna
Maddilyn
Answer to:
Other than a bed, where else have you slept?
Couch, floor, cot, car, back of a truck, bus, in a tent, in a plane, on a raft, on a boat, airplane terminal, bus terminal,...shoot, I think it would easier to say where I have not slept.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
I used to ____________________, but now I __________________________ instead.
run 5 miles a day
take the car
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
my gf buy a cndm 4 a guy coz ds guy kips on askn her 4 som cdms evn do she has non,thts why she buy sme for him wat do u tink abwt her excs?
My eyes...my eyes...........
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Is there a woman you can think of that is scary? If so who is it?
In looks...Phyllis Diller
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Name something that is curvy? Anything
School grades
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
The bad news is___________but the good news is___________
the animals died in the fire
so did your ex wife.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Boston_______________
Terrier
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How do you know you are correct?
Cause Mama said.
Answer to:
When was the last time you wore boots of any kind?
1983, the year I got out of the Army.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Hey that soup is so manly..its has _____________________ in it.
power tools
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
This ship is going to stop only where i want it to stop...I've got the _______________________in my cabin.
Captain tied up
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What is the best way to tame a unicorn?
You have to grab it by the horn and feed it gummie bears.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Do you prefer lobster or crab?
Snow Crab please.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Approximately how much time do you spend on the phone specifically with family or relatives?
Probably around an hour a week.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you use your computer right now?
No, my other personality is at the moment.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Who taught you how to braid hair? (To anyone this might apply to)
My then wife, now ex wife. She had hair down to her butt cheeks.
Answer to:
Do you have a printer at home?
I do, but has not been used for a year or so.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Why do the French pee in the streets?
Oui oui...why?
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Can I clip your wings ?
Sure, I do not know why they leave the tips on my chicken wings...there is no meat there.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How do YOU spell relief ?
F A R T
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can you smell something fishy?
I do, my kimchi must be ready.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Did you say please to the police?
Sure did, but he still would not give up that jelly doughnut.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why can't you just get it through your head?
I'm pushing as hard as I can, obviously the tip of the arrow is pretty dull.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you like the smell of chickens?
Only when they are cooking.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Guess what? Chiken butt! Know why? Chicken thigh! Guess who? Chicken poo! Know how? Chicken cow! Guess when?
Chicken pen
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What's your "AKA"....??
Grizz
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Who gets your Goat.....!!
The last goat went to the coyotes.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Say anything?
Anything
Answer to:
Is that all?
What you see is what you get..that is all.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
That's all you got?!
I didn't know I needed to bring the whole cow.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Why you eating my pieces of chickens?!
So that all those little pieces weren't laying all over the table.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
I crave your mouth your voice your _________________
hair.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
DO cloacas have more fun?
They sure did when Steve Irwin was still around.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
If you eat my foods, _______.
I gonna smacka yo face!
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Name something you can do to a bare butt?
Draw a letter "B" on each cheek and call it Bob!
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
I've got a ________________________
pickle, I've got a pickle, I've got a pickle hey hey hey hey.....(according to Buckwheat of the Little Rascals_
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is something that you don't want to look at? Why not?
Rosie O'Donnell naked...oh wait, I don't even want to see her dressed.
My eyes, my eyes........
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
I think I will______________
I think I will just stay here and drink.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Why humans started to eat hot food?
It made the pterodactyl taste like chicken.
Answer to:
any cheap suggestions to keep warn in 10 degree weather?
Well, since this is in the hunting category...split open the large animal you just killed and crawl inside...should keep you warm for an hour or so.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
The verdict is in for Dr Murray. What do you think it is?
Guilty, Innocent or a Deadlock?
Guilty of Involuntary Manslaughter according to the verdict.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
why would anyone kill a mockingbird?
They're on a mockingbird diet.
Answer to:
Thinking of getting a Lorum piercing (pic included at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lorum) ... What do you think?
To each his own. Not for me, but if that's what you want...I say go for it. I personally would not put the lil feller I grew up with through that...lol
Answer to:
I'm trying to change______________________
the channel, have you seen the remote?
Answer to:
What is something you've decided you're unable to learn?
Say no to the grand children.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Touch of ______________________
gray.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
So lets just hope there is _________________________________
more from where this came from.
Answer to:
I would love a __________________________ right now!
stack of $100's
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
A fist full of ___________
knuckles
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
BEEEEEEEEEEFFFFFFFFFFF???? or CHICKEN?
Mooooo Love the beef.
Answer to:
It's________________Time!!
about that
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Can you live alone without family and friends?
I can and have, just prefer not to.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Can you name one item you absolutedly believe that you are paying too much for...
Gasoline
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Do you consider yourself attractive .....why? add picture =)
In a hairy sort of way...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Are you a Friendly Stranger?
I may be strangely friendly, but not The Friendly Stranger
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I'm in love with ___________.
this girl that I'm talking about.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
whiskey_________________
whiskeys to rough, champagne cost to much...vodka puts my mouth in gear. This little refrain should help me explain, as a matter of fact I like beer.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
This is a formal dinner...please put on a ____________________
shirt and pants, I said Formal, not come "Normal"
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
How much would you like?
Just enough to satisfy my craving.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Can anyone tell me about "Zippy the Pinhead?"
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zippy_the_Pinhead
Answer to:
What do you think is under the big one?
What to think of as "The Big One"...
Maybe the twins, the boys?
Or, a bunch or rubble and mayhem if the big one hits.
Answer to:
Do not ______________ this computer
Do not sneeze on this computer, it has enough viruses already.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
guys: got any urinal stories?
Uh, none that I can think of other than that I used to work at a vitreous china factory and I have made many urinals, toilets and lavatories.
Answer to:
how long are u comfortable with a stranger staring at u?
Maybe 10 seconds, then we are no longer strangers...
I usually just stare back at them, and they usually look away.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Did you flush the toilet?
Not yet, I was wanting to get a ruler and a camera so I can document this wonderful turd and send it to the Guinness World Records to see if I broke a record.
Answer to:
Yes, you may have my extra ticket to _______.
the Freaker's Ball
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
___________________dandy
Go Jim Dandy
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you like fish sauce?
I do when I add it while making kimchi, also oyster sauce and shrimp sauce.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Dr. Frankenstein said I've got good news and bad news, the good news is I'm giving you a second head, the bad news is I'm getting it from
a girl named Abby Normal.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
After the bank robbers ran into the car wash the police had to ________________________________
stop them from getting a clean getaway.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Well, that was____________________
a bummer.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Can you tell me whats this for? (Showen in red circle below:)
They are electric eel fishing poles.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever lost your marbles?
Sadly I have lost many of my Cat's Eye's, Commies, Steely's, Crystals and Bumbos...Oh how I miss them so.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can bald people have hair line fractures?
Only when splitting hairs.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Humpty Dumpty sat on a ________________.
muffin...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Little Bo Peep has lost her__________________.
sense of humor....
| 7 people like this
Answer to:
Are you knock knock knocking on Heaven's door?
Not according to the death clock...I still have 16 years to go.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why is it usually harder than it looks?
Viagra I suppose.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why do you get up each day?
Because the bathroom is in another area of the house.
Answer to:
What do you call a cat that stands straight up and totally still?
Froze solid
Answer to:
What could your browser history tell me that you wouldn't?
Nothing...I have nothing to hide.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is one question you have asked for your entire life?
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
When will you return to me?
As soon as the garbage patch kids un-cuff me.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Before an actor goes on stage, he always kisses his__________________
Wallet
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
You have been tasked with creating a new battle cry for your country's military, what would you come up with?
I like what Achmed the dead terrorist would say..."Silence!...I kill you"
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
___________ mate
Consummate
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
"I'm wasted and I can't find my way home" How do you find your way?
A trail of bread crumbs...always hungry after getting wasted.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
want an approximation of when you will die? http://www.death-clock.org/
You will live to be 66 years, 9 months and 27 days old!
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Should I drink alone while listening to I Drink Alone?
No, call me or George Thorogood...we will help you drink alone.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How old were you when you found out that Santa isn't real? Who told you?
What? No Santa? Where did you hear this? Have any proof to back this up? Wow, I'm really bummed now.
Answer to:
How big is it really?
Ginormous
Answer to:
So you got caught with it in your mouth?
Yep, just wish he would have quit trying to reel in the line...that darn hook hurt.
Answer to:
Is there anyone famous, who was born in your town?
Not in my town of 300 people, but the town of 130 people just a couple of miles from me is where Burl Ives was born.
Answer to:
What does muppet taste like? If I'm serving muppet at a dinner party, which wine should I offer to go with it?
Muppet has way to much filler in it, very fibrous. I'd recommend if you are going to eat muppet...MD 20/20 wine is needed.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
I've accepted the fact that _________.
I will be on oxygen therapy for life.
Answer to:
Do you ever drive 'under' the speed limit?
Well yes, don't try to, but there are times when it is a must.
Answer to:
What is something you think about way too often?
Lately, finances.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
It you cannot hold it much longer, what would you do?
Let it rip and blame it on the dog.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I missed _______ while I was _______.
the squirrel
aiming for the ex.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Were you bottle fed?
Nope, got it straight from the tap.
Answer to:
Do you like prune juice? And what does it do to you?
Never tried it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Popeyes or Dairy Queen?
Never been to a Popeyes, none even remotely close, and go to Dairy Queen maybe once a year. So...Neither.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you think of me when you are watching television?
Yes, I blame you every time the picture goes out.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you like chicken noodle soup?
Occasionally...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Do you like your online name? Scale from 1 to 10
Have had the same online name for close to 20 years...so it has to be a 10.
Answer to:
Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, why would he want to jump over the candlestick?
He didn't have a razor, and it sounded like a good idea to get rid of that unwanted hair.
Answer to:
I wear my sunglasses at night?
Your future must be bright!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Whys everybody stop singing?!
Someone shut off the music.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Let's do a routine head count. Yes? ONE here!
I'm just one, but now I make 4.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What do you like having two at a time ?
Double shots of Tequila
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Nothing is more hopeless than _________________?
being blind and trying to thread a needle.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
An odd thought stikes me________________________?
An odd thought strikes me, does it really take two to tango?
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What the hell is this damn thing!?
Not sure, but it's a good thing you didn't step in it.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Where is the worst place to get a paper cut?
Your tongue.
Answer to:
In the beginning, _______, but in the end, _______.
I started
I finished
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
pigeons are delicious, do you agree?
Squab is delicious when cooked correctly.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Dude where's my phone?
Have ya checked the toilet?
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is something that you always do?
Visit the toidy every morning.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
How fast can you type? (Eg: 4 letters every 5 seconds)
68...gotten slower through the years.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you shout at your monsters ?
Not anymore, they all grew up and moved away.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
A thing of beauty is a _____________________?
newborn child.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I think that I shall go and _____________________?
watch my show.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Seek abroad and you may find_____________?
a broad.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Three items you always keep in your fridge?
Hot peppers, hot sauce and milk. My fridge is never without these three items.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
A home is___________________?
where ya make it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
If you had to walk around with something posted on your forehead for a week, what would it be?
This space for rent.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Do you always have a dessert after your main meal?
Nope, the only time I have dessert after a meal is on Thanksgiving and Christmas Day meals.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Fill in the blank: Like a good neighbor, _________ is __________.
I pick up your dogs poop from my yard and throw it on your front porch.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
I can still ____________.
breathe, I'm not dead yet.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Happy ________ Weylon!
Happy happy joy joy Weylon! And a happy birthday also.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
You open your eyes and you are the Frankenstein creature, your first words?
Holy guano batman, I look like Fred Gwynne!
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
You know you are poor when __________.
dirt is the main appetizer.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
My favourite all time guitarist is ?
Stevie Ray Vaughn...but lately it has been Trace Bundy.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Has anyone ever slapped your hands?
Many times, especially while playing the slap game. http://www.ehow.com/how_2489_play-slap-game.html
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Did your toast fall on the buttered side ?
No, I just like to butter the counter first.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
..............!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!................???????????????
BR549
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Does your voice sound feminine?
Only when one of the grand kids accidentally head butts me in the crotch.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Is it that time of the month?
Yes it is, just got done sending out about 15 bills.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What would you say if you saw me shoot someone who liked to asked poo smearing questions?
I'd say "Oops there goes another fecalfeliac"
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why is it that you always want to be in the middle.
I like being the meat in a sandwich.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
why do i wake up with such a sore throat?
Do you snore? If so, this could be the culprit.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Do you go to the bathroom alone?
Why yes, yes I do!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever done anything bad?
This one time in band camp...
I'll never tell.
Answer to:
Did you ever call anyone by the wrong name?
So much so that my children think I named them wrong.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
You do realize I'm not actually Kim Kardashian, right?
Seriously? Darn...oh wait, who the heck is Kim Kardashian anyways?
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What is something that you should not carry?
An elephant...might do some severe damage to your back...
| 7 people like this
Answer to:
What is something that you don't miss?
My ex wife
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Do you sleep better when the room temperature is warm or cold? Do you have a temperature range that you prefer to sleep in?
Mid 50's to low 60's with fan and blanket on.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is something you did recently that you did for the first time?
Made Spicy South Seas green tomato relish.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Who should you never tease?
The Judge right before he renders the verdict.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever told someone that they love you?
I'm always telling my kids "You know you love me"...so yes.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Should people with tattoos be treated like criminals ?
No...Friendly Stranger said it the way I would have.
Just remember...there is only one difference between tattooed people and non tattooed people...tattooed people don't care if you're not tattooed.
| 11 people like this
Answer to:
Can I rent your poodle?
Rent? Well, if your talking for studding with my miniature poodle, sure...$350 a shot.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Would you adopt a platypus?
Only if I could name him Perry...Hey, where's Perry?
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Did Jack really had a thing with Jill?
He did until everything started going down hill.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Do sticks and stones really break bones?
If they get hit hard enough...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Just why?
Cause Mama said!
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
when is the last time you had ice cream?
Five to six months ago.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Who's wrong?
According to the Water Boy "Colonel Sanders" is wrong.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
At what age did you truly feel like you'd grown up and became an adult?
17 when I enlisted in the Army...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
How many, if any, microwaves have you had in the last ten years...
If my memory is correct, I'd say two.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can you eat a lemon without wincing?
Yep, been eating lemon for a long time.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do crabs think humans walk sideways?
If the crab hangs out at many bars, it probably does think humans walk sideways.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Spaghetti and meatballs or? Spaghetti and meat sauce
Meat sauce, don't care for meatballs.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Would You Do It All Over AGAIN??
Most of it in a New York Minute...but a few...nah.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
what is that bulge in your pants?
My one eyed trouser trout.
Answer to:
What did Jack say to Jill?
Jack and Jill went up a hill
to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high, and unzipped his fly
and said come on you know you wanna.
Jill said yes and dropped her dress
and then they had some fun.
But dumb a$$ Jill forgot the pill
and now she has a son.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What kind of egg was humpty dumpty?
Well he wasn't very eggcited about falling.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
How old were you when I was born?
A dollar three eighty...or 10.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Should I get Satan's name tattooed on my forehead?
To each his own, but I wouldn't recommend it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How soft do you like your toilet paper to be?
Anything softer than John Wayne toilet paper...you know the kind that is rough, tough and don't take no sh*t off of anybody.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How do you like your stuffing?
Put on a different plate.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Halloween is a good time to ______?
help kids get cavities.
Answer to:
Peanut Butter...
Wont bother me, don't like the stuff.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Can you lick it?
Only three times, then I crunch it to get to the center of the tootsie pop.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Halloween was going well until _______.
the jack-o-lantern caught the little kids costume on fire.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What do you do to spruce up your box of Jiffy cornbread mix?
I add jalapenos.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Who's been getting your attention in the grocery store recently?
Just my Niece...she is in charge of the dairy section and I'm always getting her attention to tell me if there are any deals to be had.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is the largest item you have ever fitted inside your pants/trousers pocket?
Probably a can of beer.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever eaten something on a dare?
Flies and grubs....
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
How often do you look at someone else's shoes?
Not often, usually only after I trip over them and I want to find out who left them laying around.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Is there something that you do not like about Halloween?
Getting T.P'd. It is cool looking the first morning after, but cleaning up the mess is a pain in the buttocks.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
How do you keep your feet happy?
Draw smiley faces on them.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
I have learned in life that____________________
I still don't know the difference of $hit from Shinola.
Answer to:
Is there a sports for lazy people?
Pocket pool
Answer to:
What does she mean when she tells me I'll see her in the bathroom?
She means she has no arms, and needs a little assistance.
Answer to:
What if you put out an old stinky couch for the garbage truck, and then found Tom Cruise jumping on it?
I would quickly push the button to compact the trash in the back of the truck.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
How do you start over again?
Rewind, then push start.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Does size matter when you are on top?
It does if the one on the bottom can no longer breathe.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you have a nice shopping mall at your town?
No malls in this town, just 2 bars, a gas station, an American Legion and a mom and pops restaurant.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Will you scratch my butt?
Sure, let me find my 10ft pole.
Answer to:
Can you stick it?
I'm sure you can, but when it wakes up you better be ready to run.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
When is the right time to reinvent yourself?
Right after you enter the witness protection program.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you like the smell of fresh cardboard?
Yeah, especially when it reminds me of the pizza they used to serve in school back in the day.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you know how to text?
Nope, never even tried.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
How often does your cat swear?
Every single meow.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How many years until your youngest child turns 18?
Over a year ago.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is another word you use instead of $hhiitt?
Crapolla
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Are you in the Sticks...
Not only in the sticks, but the leaves too.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you get extremely wet in the shower?
Why yes, yes I do...and to the life of me, I still can't figure out why.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How good of a shot are you with a gun? Rate yourself from 1 to 10.
7 without a scope.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What watershed do you live?
Mississippi River
Answer to:
When death knocks, ________________ ?
When death knocks, he obviously did not see the door bell button.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Can you name something that people make dirty for a living?
Porno Movies/Magazines
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you believe in cheese?
I believe cheese is real. I actually seen some the other day at the grocery store.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Would you rather have someone scratch your back or tickle your front?
Well I'm not ticklish, so I guess I will take the back scratch.
Answer to:
How well do you know the back of your hand?
Pretty darn well I'd say, known it all my life.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Will you ask me something?
Weylon, am I pregnant?
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What do you do when you are alone?
My dogs don't let me alone, so I am never alone.
Answer to:
Are you light skinned, white skinned, pink skinned, tanned skinned, yellow skinned, brown skinned, or black skinned? What skinned are you?
Multi-colored skinned, tattoos cover most of it up.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Who wants to join me in saying CONGRATS TO THE REDBIRDS on their 11th World Series championship?
Yeah Baby!!! Congrats Redbirds!
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Give me a word that rhymes with tickle?
Frickle
Answer to:
What did your father used to call your mother?
The same as he does now...By her name, Pauline or her nickname, Poodie.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is something that has gone by too fast?
My children and grand children growing up.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Is there a name for ppl who like snowy icy places?
Inuit
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you love to eat apple butter and then pee nuts?
Apple butter is ok...but pee nuts? Most painful me thinks.
Answer to:
Why did you jump in front of my car?
I needed something to put on my resume that would show that I was qualified to install speed bumps.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What was your most recent "uh oh" moment?
When I was outside and yesterdays chili kicked in.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
The best part about waking up is ___________.
knowing you have made it another day.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
What do you like to put BBQ sauce on?
Shredded pork
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Don't you hate when you find a ___________ in your __________ ?
fly
soup
I mean, he wont eat much, but I'm not sharing.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is a sign that you're likely to lose your job soon?
When you see a sign on the door saying "Going out of business".
| 7 people like this
Answer to:
You are pulled over by the police. What is your first reaction?
License plate light must be out, I know I didn't do anything wrong.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
My father use to say, "you can put that in your pipe and smoke it", nearly everyday. Did you father have a catch phrase? what was it?
Get that (snake, alligator, turtle, lizard) out of the house... you know your mother said no more pets.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What did your mother used to say?
You better quit pouting or a bird will poop on you lip.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Everytime I hear ______, I remember _____.
"Last call"
it's time to go home
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
High School is __________
33 years in my past.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
In 1994 what was happening to you or what were you doing?
Trying to potty train my youngest child.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
My internet connection is so slow, everytime I want to log on, I have to ______?
run in the Boston marathon.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Does music help you fall asleep?
No, but the hum of my oxygen machine or a fan does.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
When is it time to give up?
When you're staring down the policeman's service revolver.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
How do I get here from there?
Take 4 lefts.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you eat a lot of peaches?
Not any more, those darn squirrels keep getting to them before I do.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is your most simple pleasure you just couldn't live without?
Salt
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Did you think it through?
I normally just jump feet first and take the consequences.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Would you be offended if you were called a skinny b*tch ?
I'd be offended if they didn't. :-)
| 8 people like this
Answer to:
What time was it as you answered this question? Please give local time and GMT or geographic information.
Central Illinois, U.S. 8:32am
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do the police do a good job of patrolling your neighborhood? How often do you see them?
We might have a police drive through once a month...they do not patrol here, no reason to, we live in a very small and safe neighborhood.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you care to join me for a swim?
It's gonna have to be a Polar Bear plunge..water is to cold here to swim.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
When is Spicy Hot.....hehe
When she gets to close to the fire pit.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Who do you think she is?
She's supa freaky
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What exactly is 'better' in the Bamahas anyways?!
The Bahama Mama's
Answer to:
Women generally have a longer _______ than men?
day in the mall
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Men generally have a longer _________ than women?
fishing pole
Answer to:
Where can you find a fairy?
Walt Disney World has plenty.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Please say something / anything. Whatever's on your mind.
What do you call a constipated German? Farfrompoopen
Answer to:
Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
I heard they take Cofftea breaks.
Answer to:
Red or Green Grapes! Which do you prefer? Seedless or not?
I like both seedless, but I prefer the green.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you like fried mashed potatoes?
Fried mashed tater cakes...mmmm hmmm
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Where are your pants?
In the washer at the moment.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
I Dream of____________________________.
Jeannie with light brown hair.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Turn around and put your hands _______.
on your cheeks and smile.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Lindsay Lohan is posing for Playboy next week, how many of you men are going to rush out & buy the issue when it hits the newsstands?
Not I...have not bought any Playboy magazines, or any other skin mag's since the early 80's.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
________ rubbed my kitty the wrong way.
That speeding car
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
The time has come for ____________ to ____________.
The time has come for Paul to Revere.
Answer to:
Have you ever watch the horror movie called Slither?
Nope, never heard of it.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Thank goodness _______________ was invented!?
the t.v. remote control
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
If you were a road sign, what would you be?
Slippery when wet
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Is it tea done?
Tea for two and two for tea. Yup, tea is done.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What's the difference between a mouse and a louse?
A louse will make your head itch, a mouse just makes some peoples skin crawl.....
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How many paper towels do you use in a public restroom?
Two or three
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Can you give me one good reason?
Well, if you don't let me drive you to the hospital you will bleed out.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Guns are best _______.
at a knife fight.
| 7 people like this
Answer to:
What sports are most common among nudist colonies?
Marathon
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Say something random please
Kumquats
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
When was the last time you went to Disney Land/World?
Have been to Disney World at least 10 times, but have not been there since 1979.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What would motivate you to look for a job?
New lungs
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How do you like those apples?
I like them peeled and salted thank you.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
The day was going well until _______.
yesterdays chili kicked in.
| 8 people like this
Answer to:
High school limits trips to the bathroom, 3 per semester. More visits result in disciplinary time. Do you approve of this policy?
Keeping that kind of policy will keep the janitor on his toes.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What never ceases to fail?
The sun rising and setting.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
In a recent poll several months back...
Toilet paper, Cigarettes?
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What's your preferred type of "chill" music?
Simon and Garfunkel
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
In one word what does your dress sense say about you?
Confortable
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever seen a butterfly on roller skates?
No, but your question did remind me of the song "You can't roller skate in a buffalo herd".
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you ever sneak outside food into the movie theater?
At the indoor theater I will occasionally pay for their food, but at the Drive-In we take our food because they allow it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever been nailed?
A rusty one at that! I stepped on a board once and ran a rusty nail right through my foot. Very painful to say the least.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I want my ________.
cake and to eat it too.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Do you feel yourself connected with a well?
Hmmm...that's a "Deep" subject.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever tried pancake syrup on ice cream?
Many times...and it's yummy!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you feel well connected with yourself?
Well the super glue is still keeping me together.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Do you like gravy on fries? What about cheese?
I did when I would eat at the mess hall in the Army...but not since then, gravy...not the cheese.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever set an animal on fire?
Once in a while when I am cooking on the grill.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What do you keep in your secret pocket?
Mostly just lint.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Where did you get those fabulous shoes?
I borrowed them from Hobojoe....
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
At what age did you first start trimming your nose hair?
Don't remember the age, but I trim them when they start snatching food crumbs from my mustache.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Can you come out of your closet?
Nope, my closet is to small to even get into, and I'm not removing any of my tattoos.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Burned all my notebooks, what good are notebooks?
Buffalo Springfield Rides Again...
Answer to:
What's a "what-not"? Do you have one?
Yes, right next to my nick nacks.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is your favorite salad dressing?
Plain ole white vinegar, or Red Wine and Vinegar.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What's the silliest mistake you've made while cooking?
Using Baking Soda when suppose to use Baking Powder and vise versa.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Do you remember the Addams Family? If so what did you think about the series?
I am a fan of the Addams Family! Liked the old t.v. series, wasn't much up on the movies.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Which under water creature do you like/dislike the most?
Cuttlefish are cool looking, and taste good.
I don't dislike any...I think all underwater creatures are cool.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Why should your friend Jack stay away from the airport?
In case someone says Hi Jack
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
What is one thing you dislike about birds?
Them chirping and waking me up.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Were you a Geek or a Freak in High School???
At 6'4" and 250lbs no one called me either one. I was neither, I was a Neanderthal.
Answer to:
Can you throw a punch?
I would never waste good punch Hobojoe....
But yes, yes I can.
| 8 people like this
Answer to:
Whats the best thing about California?
It's thousands of miles away from me.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Let's go to a bar. What do you want so I can pre order?
Pitcher of beer, tomato juice and a shot of Pissed off Mexican. (Tequila and Hot Damn)
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Are you a horrible dancer?
Not sure, I never dance.
Answer to:
What was the last thing you took out of your freezer?
Salad shrimp
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How concerned are you about food safety?
Being that I grow most of my vegetables and gets my meats from reliable farmers...not very much
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What was the best kind of food you were introduced to?
There are so many, but Snow Crab, Shrimp and all Korean foods top the scales.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Can you name something or someone people are often chased by in movies???
Psychos
Monsters
Giant Insects
Ghosts
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Do you love eating raw meats?
I do, as long as it is not "Fowl" or "Foul"
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you like feeding people? Why or why not?
I enjoy cooking and thus enjoy feeding people.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Once in a ____________________________.
lifetime
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Would you hire a wino to decorate your home?
Sure and he will take out the dining room table, and put a bar along that wall.
"And a neon sign, to point the way, to the bathroom down the hall."
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
You may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?
Those darn Talking Heads
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
If I give my dog a treat she buries it outside and inside.She has done this since I got her.What is the reason for this?
They do this because their saving some food for when there is nothing else to eat, or to eat later when they are hungry.
Answer to:
What would you say if you walked into your room just in time to see my giant pet python disappearing down your shoes?
I'd say, "Well, that's better than him downing my shoes"... only pair I have.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What does the cat litter do?
It do, doo doo.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Does anyone like fried bologna sandwiches?
Many times as a kid, but now...Yuck!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Complete this sentence: ______________________ is always getting in my way.
My mustache
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Are you ready to receive?
Should I give before I receive?
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Do you like meat in your cereal?
Yeah, bacon in my oatmeal...
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
___________really sucks
My bank account
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Why does everyone like you?
Well, not everyone does, but a lot do because I give them no reason not to.
| 8 people like this
Answer to:
What is your favourite latin phrase?
damnant quod non intelligunt
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Does your cat knows how to use toilets?
I had a cat many years ago that did actually use the toilet, but she never learned how to flush.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Does your cat litter?
No, he deposits it into the correct receptacle.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you enjoy eating fish?
Fish is good...mmm k.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever done something stupid to prove a point?
More times than I can count.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever helped someone or something, anonymously?
Several times. One small example...leaving money in the coin slot of a washing machine at the laundry mat for the next person that uses it.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Would it really be too much to ask for you to to _____ after you _____?
rinse off your plate
are done eating
Answer to:
Do you like frozen bananas?
Chocolate covered...yes. But hard on the teeth.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you eat "Oyster stuffing" where you're from?
Do you like it?
Why? What's it like?
My Mother-In-Law makes it every thanksgiving, but does not stuff the bird with it. It is always make in a pan. It is not bad, but it is definitely an acquired taste.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What are your thoughts when you see a large gathering of crows?
They are getting ready to roost......
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Everything's better with ______ on it.
Blue Bonnet
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What do you not want to be caught doing on camera? Why?
Taking a healthy crap, or any crap for that matter...no need to explain...:-)
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Men: When you eat at a restaurant, why do so many of you tuck your napkins into the front waist band of your pants?
Can't say, have never seen this.
Answer to:
What is your favorite type of meat?
Snow crab...Cause it's scrumpdillyicious!
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Are you ready for now?
I'm ready now, but can't wait til later.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Will you scratch my belly?
That's a good boy...(scratch scratch)...good puppy...(scratch scratch)...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What would you do if you found a blue sock under your pillow?
I would quit blaming the washing machine and dryer for eating my socks.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
______________, the other white meat.
Snow Crab
| 7 people like this
Answer to:
What is your favorite style of comedy? (slapstick, satire, dark, etc.)
Benny Hill and Mel Brookes styles.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
When I eat ________, I love to cover it in cheese!
Nachos and pizza
Answer to:
So what's on the menu for Thanksgiving?
Well I hope I'm not using a menu, that would mean I am at the truck stop for Thanksgiving....lol
Don't really know other then the usual stuff, we don't have one at our house because we have 3 different Thanksgivings (homes) to go to each year.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Does it bother you that Steve Jobs will make more money while he's dead than you will in your lifetime?
But can "HE" spend it? Does not bother me one iota.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
True or False: Your name has the letter "E" in it?
False. No E at all in my first, middle or last name.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Does Anyone have any awesome ideas for 50th birthday party GAG Gift?
A banana warmer from Spencers.....
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Which teams will you never be a fan of? Why?
Dallas Cowboys...When I lived in Texas I just got tired of everywhere you went you saw "Dallas Cowboy" stuff everywhere.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What does it mean when Rose eats the woman you have just given her?
Means Rose has a very large appetite.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
D is for ___________
dummies
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why is the "bad" wind blowing?
It's due to all the beans I ate yesterday.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What did you do to my food....?
Nothing...why?...does it taste funny?
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
When's the last time you saw a squirrel?
Just a little bit ago...I see them everyday in my yard.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
OH NO ITS __________________________!!!! AAAHHHHHHHHH!
Mr. Bill
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Dad, is that you???
I'm not sure, what is your Mothers name?
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
When is it a good time to panic?
Right after you hit the hornets nest with a baseball bat.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Where in the world is ___________
Carmen Santiago?
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Will you meet me under the tree on Christmas?
Ok, but there wont be much room under there for anything.....
Answer to:
How chilly is it where you live right now?
42 and raining.....lousy cool day.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What are two of your favorite sandwiches?
Pastrami and Swiss on Rye with some horseradish.
B.L.O.T (Bacon, lettuce, onion and tomato)
Answer to:
Do you have teenagers?
One who only has 3 months left to be a teenager.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
As a child growing up what food did you absolutely despise? Do you still despise it?
Spam, Hominy, Peanut Butter....still wont eat it.
Cottage Cheese, but eat it now.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Lions and Tigers and Bears ____________!
are getting some help from Jack Hanna.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Do you eat any carnivorous animals?
Alligator, rattlesnake, fish and snapping turtle...yup
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why isn't your father an engineer?
Because he was a Data Processor for N.A.S.A. before he retired in 1976.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What were you fascinated with as a child?
Reptiles and amphibians....I was always catching snakes, small alligators, lizards, frogs etc. and bringing them home. Mom was not to happy, but Dad didn't mind. I am still fascinated with them. I have snakes and Lizards now.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
E is for __________
Expeditional
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What's a bad thing for a man to bring on his honeymoon?
Blow up doll
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Do you prefer albums or 8-tracks?
Prefer albums, but back in my hay-days it was kinda hard to play an album in the car, so it was 8-track then.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Why are cashiers always "checking me out" ?
I'm not sure, but they sure know how to push the right buttons to make me pay up.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What three letter word comes to your mind?
Why?
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What is the most asked for item at American restaurants?
A Menu
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
If you were a spider in my home, where would you hide so that I wouldn't kill you? Good day everyone!
Under the toilet seat.....
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Do you have conversations with grocery clerks?
Well, living in such a small community I pretty much know all of the grocery clerks...so yes, yes I do.....
| 9 people like this
Answer to:
Rats in the attic. How to get rid of them?
Python's and Boa's will do the trick.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What lyrics would you not put in a love song?
Baby you're so whack, how about shaving my butt crack.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Why is Mindfreak's nose so fat????
That's where he stores his illusions.
Answer to:
Mowgli called last night, what did he say???
He asked if I wanted to go hang out with him, Bagheera and Baloo at the pub and have a few pints.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How was your High School prom night? Mine was the worst night of my life sadly.
Did not go...went skinny dipping with my girlfriend and several other friends instead...We had a hoot.
Answer to:
My skinny jeans are so tight, everytime I wear them, ________?
my voice raises several octaves.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Welcome Back RoadWarrior!! :)
Woo hoo!!! Let the party begin. Welcome back RoadWarrior!
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Wood you?
I wood if I cood...that wood be good.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Can spiders mate with octopi?
Talk about eight legged freaks....
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What are the advantages of not wearing an underwear?
Less laundry
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
If you're sleeping on my bed, where am I suppose to sleep?
I don't know, but here's a pillow...now let me sleep.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is your first thought when you hear a key turning in your front door?
What the heck are they doing using a key, I never lock that door.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How many months until your birthday?
6.....
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
How many cars have you bought in your life?
14 cars
6 trucks
6 motorcycles
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What age were you when you got your first cell phone?
I am 50, and have never had a cell phone.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
So, who won?
The gingerbread man
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
ee bhaasha AB yil aarkenkilum manasilaakunundo ?
Gesundheit
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
OK, who's the fool who used my brand new vacuum to ____________ ?!
clean out the horse stalls.
Answer to:
Are you getting any action?
I get a lot of reaction when I ask for some action.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Trust me , Im a ___________.
Lawyer
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
That is some heavy _______.
That is some heavy sh*t right there.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Tell me a great song I should listen to that most people have probably never heard.
In Spite of Ourselves (John Prine)
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Should we pee on the fire?
Sure, but I'm gonna stand back some...don't need a wienie roast.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Why would anyone hook body cables to their jumper?
For an electrifying experience.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
A zombie just ate your right arm. You are now hanging from a cliff ledge by your left arm and your butt starts to itch. What do
Pass gas and hope that does the trick.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
The unconventional bride shocked everyone when she carried __________ down the aisle!
a shotgun
Answer to:
Do you think Bornabrit is really watching you? Her profile says so.
Well I hope so, or all this laying around in the buff has been a waste of time.
| 17 people like this
Answer to:
Let's _______ now and then _______later.
do it
do it again
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
You're all time favourite double act?
Mel Brooks and Harvey Korman
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What made you start?
She said go......
Answer to:
Should I be afraid if inanimate objects start talking to me?
Only if you start talking back to them....
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever poked yourself in the eye?
I blinded myself in my right eye for about 5 minutes many years ago by poking myself with my thumb. My second son was ready to be born and the nurse gave me some shoe covers to put over my shoes so that I could go into the delivery room. I told her that they were to small to cover my size 15 shoes, but she said do what you have to to get them on. Well....I tried to stretch them over my shoe...
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Can you hold your breath for one minute?
I'm lucky if I can hold it for 30 seconds, pulmonary fibrosis sucks.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Will you cover me?!
I've got ya covered, now hurry up before the boss gets back.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Will you cut me?
Well if you drop an easy pop fly like that again, I may just have to.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Is it broken?
It's not broken, it has always hung to the left like that.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Whatever happened to the boy in the bubble and the baby with the baboon heart?
Not sure but, these are the days of miracle and wonder.....
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
She gets _______ on a full moon.
freaky
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Are you a billionaire?
I was until I got married, now I'm just a millionaire.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What advice would you like to give your doctor?
Warm your damn hands up the next time before you give me a physical.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What smell or smells are you likely to smell if you open your windows at home ?
Country.....horses, cows, grain from the grain mill being transferred to the silos.......
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Its been a while since _____________________________
I've been ice fishing.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Is a stick shift more enjoyable to drive than manual? Why?
Manual (stick, or on the tree)
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Where were you on the night of August 15, 1972?
It was a Tuesday, and depending on what time of the day it was..I was either in school or fishing on the beach.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
You just realized Bill "Bubba" Clinton moved in next door to you......you would _______ ?
hide the cigars.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
THERE! WAS THAT HARD?!
Yes it was, now put that thing away before you poke someones eye out.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
how many bananas?
As Harry Chapin would sing "30,000 pounds of bananas"
Answer to:
You hear gunshots at 6:30 am on a Sunday morning....what do you do?
Wait for my neighbor to call me over to help dress the deer he just bagged.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you believe everything you believe?
I try really hard to believe everything I believe, but it's just so darn hard.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Uuuuhhhh, what are these five things growing on the end of my hand? They weren't there yesterday, heeeelllllpppppp!
You've been playing with toads again haven't you? Must be warts.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Congratulations! You just crossed the line. Where have you stepped into?
The twilight zone
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
How many foods do you have left?
Enough to feed a small army.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
When the media do straw polls, where do they get the straws?
Off of Juicy Juice boxes.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
My current cellphone is so old, I need to ____ before I can make a call or send a text.
wind the rubber band
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever done it in a closet?
Heck no, to many skeletons in there.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Where is Little Bunny Foo Foo?
Looking for the field mice
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What's that __________ for?
thingamajiggy
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Its difficult to eat when there's ________________ in my mouth.
no teeth
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
In your opinion, what do you think?
What does this have to do with the price of beans in Sangamon County Illinois?
Answer to:
Other than walking, many antropologists believe this was early man's first mode of transportation. What is it?
Taxiosaurus
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What would Chuck Norris do if he met a bear in the woods?
S**t in the woods?
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Tell me a story?
This one time in band camp.............
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Why didn't you come to my bar mitzvah?
Oh sorry, I thought you said come to my Bar Mister.....
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
If I remove the bath from my bathroom, what is that room then called?
Outhouse
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why would anyone want a monkey for?
To fling poo at unwanted guests...
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
A woman in the bed is worth two in the _____.
Divorce Court
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
If your a fan of baseball which team do you think will win the World Series?
I'm kinda of torn.....I was a Texas Rangers fan back in the 70's early 80's until I moved to Illinois and got married....She was a big Cardinal fan, I became a Cardinal fan. So...I would love to see the Rangers and Cardinals play in the World Series...but.....I guess really, I would have to lean to the Cardinals.
Answer to:
Have you ever broke a tooth on anything?
Several....jawbreakers are my downfall.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
We are _____?
family
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What springs to mind when I mention the word speedy?
Speedy Gonzales Cartoons
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
when was the last time you went skinny dipping was it lone or with someone and who
Couple of months ago in the father in laws pond....just me, the ole lady and the fish.
Answer to:
How do you keep your mind off sex?
Keep snapping my fingers with a mouse trap.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
See you at ________________ just don't bring ______________ ?
the submarine races
your husband
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is your favorite word starting with G?
Gargantuan
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you go to the theatre to see movies anymore or do you wait for the DVD? I personally I wait for the DVD and watch movies at home. I like being able to hit pause to grab a snack or go to the bathroom. Also quick rewind is nice.
Not to often, it all depends if the granddaughters are here or not.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do You Eat Untill Your Full, Or Do You Finish Whats On Your Plate?
I do. I have a motto here at my house. Take all you want, but eat all you take.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is a "must have" in your kitchen?
Hot Peppers and or Hot Sauce
| 8 people like this
Answer to:
What's your favorite Hostess snack food?
That's hard...I love lots of them. Suzie Q's, Ho Ho's, Ding Dongs, Zingers, Twinkies and the Hostess Cupcakes.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
have you ever had an obsession with a celebrity? who?
I've had a crush on Jodi Foster since my early teenage years, 35 plus years.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What things do you do/have done under the influence alcohol? that cost you in one way or another?
Years ago it caused me to lose my clothes and dance on the pool table....I was the butt of all jokes for quite awhile.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is something that you would NOT want someone to know about you?
I wouldn't want anyone to know that _______when__________and the _________is over.
| 7 people like this
Answer to:
Do you even listen to the Miranda Rights when you are spread eagled?
I wait till the cavity search.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Say, bye bye _______________.
Say bye bye to your WiFi
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Name something short and round. ________
Marbles
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Thunder only happens when it's raining, players only love you__________________.
when they're playing
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What is the best name for an adorable black male puppy?
Onyx
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
When would you think someone has really, really bad hygiene?
When the flies wont have anything to do with you.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why, I oughta ________.
whip ya till ya bleed.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Patti Jo bacame a "GENIUS" today,can we all congratulate her?
Congrats Patti Jo!
| 9 people like this
Answer to:
Someone once told me ________.
"You better shop around"
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Are you too much to handle?
Nah, I'm just right.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever pointed a gun at someone?
Paintball, water and rubber band guns yes...a real gun, no.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
I really need to spend more time_______________________?
getting my health back.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Picture _______________________ with a Kodak!
is worth a thousand words
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I am pregnant. Should I get a nintendo?
Better get two, you're gonna have twins.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Saturday Night's Alright For ____________________________?
fighting
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What can you not conquer?
Mt. Everest....Lungs wont let me.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever been a fair-weather fan?
Dolphin's fan since the 60's...that tells all...
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What should you should do if you see someone foaming at the mouth?
Ask if you can have one of his alka seltzer tablets to foam along with him.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Why are there no slow food restaurants?
We have a so called fast food restaurant near us that has got to be the slowest fast food restaurant in the world. The Hardee's in a town near us takes so long to get you your food that I refuse to eat there.
Answer to:
how ticklish are you on a scale of 1 to 10?
1, There is only one spot that I am ticklish at, and only one special person knows where that is.
Answer to:
Guys while using the bathroom to release your bowels, do you hold/keep your penis inside to toilet or do you leave it out?
I throw mine over my shoulder....that water is cold.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Whats the difference between a Koala and a Cola ?
Where the beverage is dispensed from.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
The one and only Bornabrit has become a Swami today. Who wants to congratulate her?
Congrats my friend Bornabrit.....
| 14 people like this
Answer to:
How old were you when you got your first job. Either full or part time?
8yrs old. Cleaning horse stalls.
Answer to:
If eating chocolate actually did the same for you has having sex would you give up sex or eat a lot more chocolate:-)
Sex has no calories...chocolate does. I'm sticking with sex.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What will you have in your omelet?
tomato, onion, jalapeno, mushroom and pepper jack cheese.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Anyone love sour kraut? What do you like to have with it?
On hot dogs, brats, kielbasa etc, and straight from the container.
Answer to:
what happens if you swallow a chewing gum?
You blow bubbles out your butt.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Someone at the cereal company is in big trouble! The prize in my cereal box is a ________________ !
Ex-Lax pill
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What are you afraid of when it comes to women?
Headaches
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What's your favorite word to use?
No s**t
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What are your views on Tattoos ? Would you ever get one ?
I have many...Just remember, the only difference between tattooed people and non-tattooed people is....
....Tattooed people don't care if you're not tattooed.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Who likes Okra?
I do, my favorite way is stewed with tomatoes, onions and bell pepper.
Answer to:
Did you ever watch "All MY CHILDREN"? On TV for 41 years?
The closest thing to a soap opera I ever watched for more than 5 minutes was Falcon Crest...so...No, never watched All My Children.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
I try to avoid_________________?
heated confrontations.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What helps you give someone your undivided attention?
Being handcuffed to the bed.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
This may still be able to be salvaged all we need ____________ ?
is some tongue depressors and super glue.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
my life ________________?
is a never ending story.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
What are some signs that you are not welcome somewhere?
When a gun is pointed at you.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Have you had any of these three today: chicken, pot or pie?
No...Chicken yesterday, but no pie...and no pot for many many years.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
You know it's time to leave the _______ when _______.
bedroom
the husband shows up.
| 7 people like this
Answer to:
If you are having a salty snack, do you have to follow it up with a sweet one ? You know you have to balance it out ....!
I don't always follow up, but I do have the craving.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is your favorite kind of pizza? I like cheeeeeessseeeee.
Veggie....Red onion, green pepper, black and green olives, mushrooms, jalapenos, tomato and pepper rings.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Are there any areas on your body where you don't feel a thing?
Three middle toes on my right foot. Had surgery for Mortons Neuroma and have lost feeling in the three middle toes. Very hard to use nail clippers, almost always cutting to close.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you been advised on what to do next by your tape worm?
To stay away from the Ghost Chili's, it gives them heartburn.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
When the world gives you too much ____, fertilize your neighbors flowers.
crap
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Is Moo Shu Pork a martial art?
I think so..it could make your pupu (s)platter.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What's your purview?
This question is outside my purview
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Where would you not go alone?
Lover's lane
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
What is the current time and temperature in your city?
8:59 and 55 degrees
Answer to:
What do you do when you become constipated?
Push, grunt and moan.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Would you drive this car to get 258 mpg?
I don't think I'd be able to fit into it. Ugly lil booger it is.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Doctor, I get this terrible pain every time I stick an axe in my head. What would you recommend I should do?
Take two Asprin's and ax me again in the morning.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Something that I HAVE to do everyday that I really dont like to do is_________?
my nebulizer treatment.
Answer to:
why you look me like that?
;-)
Uh, you just came out of the bathroom didn't you?...you have toilet paper dragging behind you.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What should never need a sign stating "This Side Up" ?
Beer mug
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
When is the last time you held a beautiful baby in your arms?
Well, if you are talking about an actual baby....Yesterday evening, holding my great niece.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Besides tires, what are things people like to keep spare(s) of??
Shoes
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Just wondering....How many speeding tickets you have had since the day you started driving? Can you even remember what age you were when you got it/them?
35 years of driving and 2 speeding tickets. Last ticket was over 15 years ago.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How do you imagine aliens would pee?
I don't know, but I refuse to shake their hand.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What was the last mistake that you made?
Putting to much Jolokia pepper in the fritter mix. The next morning was horrible.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Truth or consequence? We are playing the game.
Truth or Consequences New Mexico
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What’s the difference between a thin pig and a fat pig besides weight?
$2.59 a pound
Answer to:
Ring it to get in a bordello. (8 letters)
Doorbell
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What were your highest and lowest salaries made in life?
Lowest $2.75
Highest $34.80
Answer to:
Men: At what age, did you finally master the "unhook the bra" challenge? honestly? :-)
Honestly?...still haven't
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why do some guys use the urinal instead of the stall to go poo?
Uh, the Bidet was occupied?
Have never known anyone to poo in a urinal.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Do you look back on your high school years fondly or not?
Not to fondly, ....went to 3 different high schools due to fathers job and did not have much time to really settle in.
Answer to:
Are you wearing your hard hat today? (Satellite showers)
No, just carrying my catchers mitt.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you like to eat cold pizza for breakfast?
I'm in. Any time we have left over pizza, it gets eaten for breakfast.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
are cream filled donuts better than donuts with holes?
If it is Bavarian cream filled....I believe so.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
September is not the month to _______.
go ice fishing.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What are some things that should not be shared?
used condoms
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Do vegans have barbeque parties?
I'm sure they do, many vegetables are great on the grill.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
I once was without toilet paper so I used ______.
the torn sleeve from my shirt.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
After the drugs wear off __________.
the hospital will present me with the bill.
| 10 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever killed an animal to eat?
Plenty of times, gotta feed the family.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
did you smile this morning?
I did, but not until the little lady asked "Who farted".....
Answer to:
I am not crazy, I am just a little ________.
tea pot
| 9 people like this
Answer to:
Is your bathroom haunted?
I think so, there has been a lot of weird crap going on in there.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Is there any history of sanity in your family?
If you take this straight jacket off of me I will tell you.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Will you go already?!
Hold your horses there XT, making a move in chess takes time.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever chased the postman along the street and bitten him for apparently no reason?
No, I always have a reason to bite him...one more piece of junk mail and he's getting it again.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
When you buy a new chair or couch/sofa, do you jump up on it, walk around in a circle 3 times and then sit down?
Not until after I lift my leg and pee on the corner so that everyone else knows that this is my couch.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
There is NO way I will EVER be spotted driving ___________ !
in East St. Louis at night
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you like French people?
I have no reason to dislike them, but I have only known two people from France, and I like them both.
Answer to:
Love this song?
Love...No, but do like it. Brings back many memories....
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
I'm not _____________________.
Lisa (Jessi Colter)
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
_____nuts
Grape
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
There is NO way I will EVER be spotted driving ___________ !
a Moped
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What are those strange markings on the wall?
That's what happens when you catch an intruder off guard....
Answer to:
What would happen if I eat too much of her vegetables?
You might just get forked.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is a werid question for me to ask my boyfriend
Is the grass always greener over the septic tank?
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Can you name a gift that keeps on giving?
Herpes
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
At what places would you find a lot of nervous people??
Maternity ward
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Question seven in a set of nine. Would you be kind enough to tell me the name of an animal whose name contains 9 letters?
Albatross
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Penultimate Numbertime animal item: would you be kind enough to give me the name of an animal whose name contains ten letters?
Salamander, Chimpanzee. Chinchilla
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Last but not least in this category, would you be kind enough to give me the name of an animal whose name contains 11 letters or over?
Mistletoebird
Answer to:
I got a ticket to ride.....where should I go ?
"Last Train to Clarksville"
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Whats something an adult should know how to do?
Read and write
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Name an animal with 7 letters.
Panther
Answer to:
Fourth-last question in this category. Name an animal whose name contains 8 letters.
Aardvark
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What foods do kids eat more than adults?
Animal crackers
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What's something you should never take on your honeymoon?
Farm animals
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
What is going to happen on 11.11.11?
According to my calendar, nothing...but there is still plenty of time for something to be going on. Just another Friday.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What's a good excuse for canceling an appointment with your dentist?
Forgot I had a Proctologist appointment.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
What is a really bad job for someone who is accident prone??
A butcher
| 9 people like this
Answer to:
Can you think of something that still exists, but it isn't quite how you remember it in your childhood?
Freedom
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why did you pull my pants down?!
They had been hanging on the clothes line long enough and it was getting ready to rain...just trying to help out.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Anyone else watch the Charlie Sheen roast? Do you think comedian Amy Schumer went to far with what she said about Steve-O?
It's typical roasting...No holds barred. Tasteless maybe, but??????
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
14 bottles of wine for 8 dollars? Have you ever heard of such a great deal?!?
Boone's Farm Tickled Pink early/mid 1970's, 75 cents a bottle.... so $10.50 for 14 bottles. Some called it a wine, I thought of it as more like koolaide with a punch.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Name a place you would visit where you're not allowed to touch anything??
Missile launch facility control room
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What is something you try to get rid of but always seems to come back?
Weight
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
You step out of the shower/bath, look at your naked self in the mirror & your immediate thoughts are.....?
What are you looking at?
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Do you eat your veggies?
Sure do, and I even usually end up eating the grand children's veggies too....
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Do you live in a small town or a big city?
Quite small...under 300 people.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Part 4. Name an animal containing 6 letters.
Magpie
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I call you a witch.....you in turn would _________ ?
ask if you would like a bite of my Eye Of Newt sandwich.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Name something you prefer to NOT purchase used.
Toilet Paper
Answer to:
What would happen if you put an elephant in your freezer?
Hi, XT!
Elephantpops
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
New series now. The first of 9. Name an animal containing 3 letters.
Cow
Answer to:
Second question in a set of 9. Name an animal containing four letters.
Lynx
Answer to:
Third question in a set of 9. Name an animal containing 5 letters.
Dingo
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Men: What do you think women complain about the most?
Headaches.....as in "Not tonight honey, I have a headache".
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
If someone put candy coated bugs into ice cream, would you try it? Even a spoonful?
I'd try almost anything once, so sure....
Answer to:
What should not be hard?
scrambled eggs
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Love and marriage go together like ____________?
a cooler full of microbrew.
Answer to:
Your friend dreamed of growing hairs all over her body, asking you what it meant, so you said _______________________
at least you wont have to dress up for Halloween.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What would you use against a killer bunny?
A killer Beagle
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is the first thing that comes to when I say; Drake the WARECAT?
Whodat Warecat?
Answer to:
What are people going to do?
They're just going to keep on keeping on....
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
It's a ___________ day .
Fri
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
You can take me to _______, but please do not get me _______.
the wood shed
excited
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
If you're happy and you know it and you really want to show it, say a bad word. Go on, I dare ya!
isang masamang salita
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Have you ever enjoyed watching submarine races? ;)
Oh yes, especially when she says...dive, dive, dive.....
Answer to:
The do-dad with the weird thingy fell off the whatchamacallit onto the thingamabob. That explains why ___________.
the whohawdilly went fliggleflackin.
Answer to:
What is it that drives you crazy?
This darn pesky fly that just wont leave me alone.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why can't you just admit that I'm right?
Because your wrong.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I told everyone "Don't drink the water". but now look! Little Jimmy turned into a ___________ !
blob of gelatinous goo...
Answer to:
Has anyone ever told you that you were a little kinki?
Ehhh.....boarderline.....
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Where did Puff live?
He lived in Puff Puff Pass.
Answer to:
Are the moon is the mars face of last times from aliens?
Ground control to Major Tom.......
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What was the last concert you saw?
Steve Miller Band, many years ago.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What does a night out with the girls/guys do for you?
It usually makes me wake up with a headache....
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is the name of the closest bar/pub/tavern/club to your house?
The closest would have to be the American Legion post #932. There are 3 drinking establishments all within about 1 1/2 blocks of each other...and this is in a town of 300 people.
Answer to:
Whats the name of your favorite bar?
Hi Benders
Answer to:
What would you do if I told you I was gonna give you a "Dutch Oven"
I guess either I will be cooking a nice roast or holding my nose.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Do you know the way to _______________?
Tucumcari
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What person do you communicate with at least once a day? (email, phone or text)
My granddaughters
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
I don't care if Godzilla is coming! I'm not leaving until ________ .
King Kong shows up
Answer to:
Whats the one thing you will NOT have in your bedroom?
A Boeing 747-8
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Would you drink unpasteurised ‘raw’ milk?
I have plenty of times. One of the bonuses you get growing up on a farm.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What's so wrong with living on the 13th floor, or in Room 13??
Nothing at all unless you are superstitious. The Munsters loved it so much that they lived on 1313 Mockingbird lane.
Answer to:
Do you have a favorite shirt? Can you describe it?
A wet one :-)
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is your favorite spoonerism? Was it someone close to you or something you read or heard?
Uh,..nucking futs
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
If you can't _________ then you can't ________
stand the heat
stay in the kitchen
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
What will happen if _________________ ?
I put the bomp in the bomp bah bomp bah bomp, or put the ram in the rama lama ding dong
Answer to:
Can you jog?
I can for just s bit, the lungs wont let me get far.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Can you light my fire?
Sure, let me get my flame thrower going.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Worst. _______. Ever.
case scenario
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
Hold the _______, please.
bull crap
| 8 people like this
Answer to:
Do you consider yourself to be a Good cook,bad cook,Gourmet cook or other?
I consider myself a decent cook, everyone that knows my cooking says I'm a great cook. They say that I am my own worst critic.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
A friend in need is a _____.
A friend in need is a friend indeed.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
When is someone to old to ask others to "Pull their finger" ??
When they are laying in a casket 6 feet under.
| 10 people like this
Answer to:
Do you have pets that get jealous when you pay a bit of attention to another?
I have 4 dogs, and if you pet one, you have to pet them all....they are all very jealous.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Just once in my life I'd like to find ___________ in my mailbox !
no junk mail
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why do mermaids wear seashells?
To give their friends the hermit crab a place to hang out in.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Hey,can you give me a ride to___________________?
Tucumcari
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What did your momma tell you when you were growing up?
Mama told me not to come
She said, that ain't the way to have fun, son
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What do you call it when you lose electricity? E.g. black-out, power outage, power cut, etc.
Here we say "There goes another fried squirrel".
Answer to:
Close your eyes and I'll ___________ you.
mesmerize
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Look out your window, what do you see & hear? I see only trees I hear crickets and birds.
All I see are horses, rain and trees, I hear crickets, frogs,rain falling and horses neighing every now and then.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Can you open______________ for me? thanks.
this can of pickled peppers
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
whats that huge ___________growing on you?
third leg
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Once a ________ always a __________?
Once a sunrise, always a sunset
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
How Big, Is A Big Foot?
Well mine could be, 15EE, but I know there are bigger feet out there.
Answer to:
Was Pee Wee's Playhouse racist cuz of the genie?
Let's ask Jambi.... Mecka-Lecka-Hi-Mecka-Hiney-Ho......Jambi says no.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What's One Cheese You Refuse To Eat?
Casu marzu and Limburger
Answer to:
Can you name something that can be acquired but cannot be taught?
The taste for certain foods
Answer to:
What makes you happy today?
Seeing my friend Cotton alive and well.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
The last thing I bought at walmart was a ____________?
prescription from the pharmacy.
Answer to:
Complete the following sequence: 1, 2, ?, 4, 5, 6, 7.
Green light, red light.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
Why are you yelling at me?!
Well, you did tell me to yell if I needed you.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Why are you scaring my kids?
Sorry, was practicing for Halloween....
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What is a hair pie?
It's kinda like shepherds pie, finger licking good.
Answer to:
What is something you don't like if it is not big?
Bank account
Answer to:
Why would somebody drink alcohol for breakfast?
Because they are my first ex wife......
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
who will my husand be?
Not I....sorry, already taken.....
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Who wants to toss the literal salad?
I will, should go well with the steaks tonight.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
Who wants to take the long way home?
Lonely days turn to lonely nights, you take a trip to the city lights, and take the long way home.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What is getting worse as you age?
Arthritis.......
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What's the most disturbing show you have ever seen?
Barney the Dinosaur
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
What food/dish makes you release gas?
I don't need a food or a reason to release gas, but...red meat and beans really help out.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Have you ever sat on the pot and then was bitten by a snake coming out of the sewer?
No, but did used to have to flush the toilet before you sat down just to make sure nothing did show up. I have seen small fish in the toilet, but that was it. We lived in Florida right next to a swamp back in the 60's.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
When would it be wise to keep your mouth shut?
When under water and needing oxygen.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
You wanna roll with me?!
Let's roll.........
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
I was told on AnswerBag that I was pregnant, turns out it was just a beer belly. Who can I sue?
Anheuser Busch
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
How many cans of beer do you want?
I'll take 36 that way I will have enough to last till next week....
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
what will cause you NOT to want to eat?
2 pitchers of beer.
| 4 people like this
Answer to:
First, ________. Then, ___________.
First comes love, then comes marriage.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
Do you have any nicknames for any of your exes?
I gave my first ex wife a nickname of "Life", because life is a b**ch.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Are you now or have you ever been a cow tipper?
Never thought of tipping a cow after milking her...huh, but I usually gave them some hay afterwards....
Nope, never been cow tipping.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
If I drive my car at 90mph at a police roadblock will it fly up into the sky like it did on The Dukes of Hazzard tv show?
As long as you don't miss the ramp it should.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
What springs to mind when i mention the word turquoise?
American Indian Jewelry
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
No shirt, no _______, no __________!
No shirt, no pants, no dignity.
| 6 people like this
Answer to:
Home _________ .
Home errrrr Simpson
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Cold _______, warm _______ .
Cold beer, warm piss.
| 5 people like this
Answer to:
When does YOUR imagination run away with you?
When asleep and dreaming.
| 3 people like this
Answer to:
His steak was so rare that ...............?
That is basically how I order my steaks...I always tell the waiter/waitress when asked how I want my steak "If you can get it to the vet in time to save its life, that's how I want it".
His steak was so "Rare" that the diner was arrested for serving endangered species.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
As a child, how obedient where you? On a scale of 1-10 (10 =really good 1=really bad ) :-)
I would have to say a good 8.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Why didn't I get a Christmas gift from you last year?
You know how snail mail is...You might just get it by next Christmas.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
why does my grandpa wear a belt even though he does not have to
Never know when you will need a tourniquet, or a weapon....
Answer to:
Guys, when you go to a puiblic restroom, do you use the high, medium or low urinal?
I like to try each one out...kinda like marking my territory.
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
I'd rather get naked than__________________.
run through a cactus field barefoot, ouch, could you imagine all those little pricks....from the cacti?
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Is anybody else having trouble breathing?
Lets see, Pulmonary Fibrosis, Asthma and Chronic Bronchitis, nah....same ole breathing troubles as usual.
| 1 person likes this
Answer to:
What is something you shouldn't do at the zoo?
Jump around like a chimpanzee and throw your poop at the visitors.
| 9 people like this
Answer to:
Well, It is Time to Say Good-Bye, Folks..
Take care RoadWarrior!
| 13 people like this
Answer to:
"I am _________."
I am Ironman...er, I mean Ironhead!
| 2 people like this
Answer to:
Would you rather have your burger grilled or fried?
Grilled, but still rare.
| 4 people like this